After last week’s nadir of content, things aren’t much better this week I have to say with a couple of honourable exceptions. It’s another ‘golden mic’ presenter slot again though unlike last week, I’m not expecting much. The double act of Jo Brand and Mark Lamarr were two of my favourite holders of the chalice but the bar is seriously lowered as this time it’s Robbie Williams. Not long departed from Take That, the cheeky Stoke-on-Trent lad probably seemed like a decent shout for the role given that he was headline news even before his solo career had begun* due to the fall out from the Take That split.

*He wouldn’t release his first solo single until July 1996

However, he must also have been a considerable risk given his appearance at that year’s Glastonbury Festival when he was clearly under the influence of…something. He was a loose cannon. He jokes early on that he’d even stayed sober for the show. Well, let’s see if he can live up to one of his song titles and entertain us…

We start tonight with D:Ream who were starting to run out of steam (and sales) some eighteen months after their No 1 song “Things Can Only Get Better”. Having taken the opportunity afforded by such a big hit and run with it by releasing a flurry of further singles to almost constant diminishing returns, the party was entering the past-midnight-talking-shite phase. Take “Party Up The World” for example. The second single from sophomore album “World”, it sounds like it was written to order to supply a middling sized hit with an equivalent sized amount of quality. The song is not aided by Peter Cunnah’s live vocal here – he definitely hits a bum note early on. “Party Up The World” would give D:Ream a No 20 hit but after that it was a case of reliving the glories of “Things Can Only Get Better” which was most famously utilised by the Labour Party for their 1997 General Election campaign. I wonder if Howard Jones ever sits at home and in a quiet moment of reflection thinks “What was wrong with my song?”

Oh, one last thing. The chorus from “Party Up The World” is surely ever so slightly influenced by this Erasure tune which is ironic as D:Ream also released a single called “Star” which didn’t sound anything like the synth pop duo’s track…

Some Eurodance next courtesy of Cappella who have changed their singer since the last time we saw them. After Kelly Overett departed, a replacement was found in the form of Alison Jordan who was initially discovered via the Search For A Star competition on BBC’s That’s Life show in 1992.

After their last few hits all had titles that were variations of the usage of the word ‘move’ and the letter ‘U’ (meaning ‘you’), the group returned to an earlier hit for the inspiration for this latest one. In 1992, they made it to No 25 in our Top 40 with “Take Me Away” and in 1995, they achieved their final UK hit with “Tell Me The Way” – it’s clever stuff no? No, not really and neither was this tune. It sounds like they’d cut and pasted the most obvious and shittiest riffs and beats from every Eurodance hit ever and just glued them altogether – the musical equivalent of a patchwork quilt but one covered in excrement.

Capella never had another UK Top 40 hit but the project is still a going concern albeit with a totally different line up and they performed on the 90s nostalgia circuit. They even released a single as recently as 2023 called “Happy Phonk” but nobody really noticed.

Unable to resist the lure of tomfoolery any longer, the previously staid and sensible persona Robbie Williams had adopted tonight until now goes out of the window as he goes into skit mode. The premise of said skit is that he’s going to reveal the truth behind what Take That are really like but the only rehearsed line he gets out before an extra dressed as a security guard drags him off camera is that they drink camomile tea. Are you entertained yet? As comedy routines go, it’s hardly up there with the “Don’t tell him, Pike!” scene from Dad’s Army is it?

The first video of the night comes from Foo Fighters for their second ever single “I’ll Stick Around”. It’s another pretty nifty, driving rock tune though not as strong a track as their debut single “This Is A Call” to my ears. Dave Grohl looks so young here but then I guess we all did 29 years ago. I used to work with a guy called Dave at Our Price who looked a bit like Grohl though on reflection I’m wondering if the lookie-likie claims were purely based on the fact that Dave had long rock hair and his name was…well…Dave.

And suddenly, from out of nowhere, a man who hadn’t had a UK Top 40 hit since 1988 and hadn’t been on TOTP for a decade. That appearance had been as part of Lloyd Cole and The Commotions performing their single “Lost Weekend”. If you’d told the 17 year old me back then that Lloyd wouldn’t be on the show for another 10 years, I would have dismissed you as a crackpot completely divorced from musical reality and yet that is exactly what happened. But how did it pan out like this? Well, after “Lost Weekend”, things quietened down for Lloyd and the Commotions. Follow up single “Cut Me Down” barely scraped into the Top 40 and then the band disappeared for nigh on two years recording their difficult third album “Mainstream”. When it did finally come out, it seemed that the world had moved on from their crafted, intelligent jangle pop and despite achieving gold status, the three singles from it could only muster these chart peaks:

46 – 31 – 59

The writing was on the wall and the band read it. They split in 1989 leaving Lloyd to pursue a solo career that somehow never seemed to chime with commercial trends. Three albums were released in quick succession in the early 90s but to limited sales. Not one of them produced a Top 40 single. And then, something finally stuck with public opinion. “Like Lovers Do”, the lead single from fourth album “Love Story” made No 24 in the charts and a TOTP appearance was warranted. I don’t know why the stars aligned between Lloyd and the record buying public on this particular single and no other – maybe it was just good marketing and promotion but it’s a nice enough song I guess.

I always liked Lloyd right from “Perfect Skin” though I can’t say I followed his solo career in too much detail. However, I saw him and the Commotions on the “Mainstream” tour when he failed to say more than two words to the audience and years later on his own in New Mills when he wouldn’t stop talking. His opening line in the latter gig to the crowd was “I know you’re all sat there thinking Lloyd Cole has let himself go a bit. Well, you should have a look in the mirror”. Excellent!

Next a song that I do remember but which I don’t recall so much fuss being made about it at the time as seems to have been written about it online since. “Fantasy” was the lead single from Mariah Carey’s fifth studio album “Daydream”. Her previous one “Music Box”* had been a monster selling 28 million copies worldwide.

*Technically her third album but I’m disregarding her 1994 Christmas collection

So how do you follow that? You just churn out a copycat album don’t you? Based purely on lead single “Fantasy”, it sounded to me like she’d done just that – it didn’t seem a whole lot different to something like “Dreamlover”. But then, I hadn’t heard the Bad Boy remix by Puff Daddy. This was the evidence of Mariah’s new direction. Featuring rapping from Wu-Tang Clan’s Ol’ Dirty Bastard, it was seen as a milestone recording by many for the fusion of urban/hip hop with mainstream pop with an emphasis on rap as a featuring act. Alongside “I’ll Be There For You / All I Need To Get By” Method Man and Mary J. Blige, it was designated as an early recording of the “Thug-Love” sub genre.

Apparently, the rest of the album was of a more R&B flavour which caused much concern and consternation at her label Columbia who really didn’t want to mess with the formula that had brought her and them so much success. The head of Sony Music (and Mariah’s husband at the time) Tommy Mottola was especially vexed. Mariah knew best however and the album was another huge seller shifting 20 million copies worldwide with “Fantasy” going to No 1 in the US and No 4 over here.

I’m not sure that this live by satellite performance from New York was worth the effort though. Is that the official video playing on the huge tv screens behind Mariah? Wouldn’t they have been better off just showing that?

Inevitably, Robbie Williams has gone there and resorted to chatting up a female audience member for his next link. Obviously, it’s all staged (he puts on a silly fake American accent) but it’s still not a good look especially 29 years on.

OK, so back with the music and it’s another showing of the studio appearance by The Rembrandts from the other week. Watching it back, I’ve noticed that in the version of “I’ll Be There For You” the band perform here, the iconic handclaps at the end of the first line seem very low in the mix and nowhere near as prominent as in the opening credits for Friends. That seem a little odd as although the addition of them wasn’t the band’s idea and they didn’t actually record them (they were done by the show’s creators who wanted to be on the record in some way), supposedly The Rembrandts thought the clapping was the best part of the song. There’s only four claps after that first line (though it sounds like more) but apparently it took loads of takes to record as the aforementioned show’s creators just couldn’t get the hang of it. I wonder if their mothers warned them that there’d be days like these?

There’s two ways to consider the next hit on the show – either it’s a clever updating (by 1995 standards) of a classic disco track or…it’s an heinous abomination of an idea that should have been dismissed as soon as it crystallised in the originator’s brain. I think, rather predictably, I’m of the latter opinion. N–Trance had started the year with one of the biggest dance anthems of the decade in “Set You Free”. Featuring vocals from Kelly Llorenna, it was a genuine, credible Hi-NRG, rave track. I, for one, didn’t see them following it up by going the tacky cover version route.

“Stayin’ Alive”, of course, was originally by the Bee Gees and was part of the soundtrack to the movie and indeed cultural phenomenon that was Saturday Night Fever. A huge global hit, it was an American No 1 song and UK No 4 in 1978. Fast forward 17 years and it was given the rap treatment by Ricardo da Force whose previous credits included some of The KLF’s biggest hits. Now, given those credentials, I would have hoped for a better outcome than what N-Trance served up which seemed to me to be calculated and cynical to appeal to the cattle market disco crowd.

The performance here goes big on all the 70s disco motifs including the obligatory geezer in the white John Travolta suit. It all seems a bit naff. However, the part where he removes his jacket and twirls it around and throws it into the audience before it is slung back landing on his arm is choreographed quite well. And that’s as positive as I can be about this one. Nasty stuff.

Despite being trailed as the play out track on last week’s show and still not to be released for another four days, Simply Red are back on the show to perform their new single “Fairground”. Not wishing to be outdone by Capella’s costumes earlier, Hucknall has turned up in his own full PVC outfit. For the love of God man! Why?! This was clearly his full on, decadent pop star phase. Check out his overflowing ginger locks as well!

I’m reminded of my own Mick story which I’ve told before but which seems appropriate here. When I first worked in Manchester at the Our Price store in Market Street as a Christmas temp, there was a young woman on the staff called Natalie who was very attractive (I think she’d done done some modelling). One morning she came into work and told us that Mick Hucknall had chatted her up in a bar and wanted to see her again but she wasn’t sure what to do about it. A bit later that day, I answered the work phone and the person on the other end asked to speak to Natalie. When I asked who was calling he simply replied “Mick”. It was Hucknall! In the end, Natalie told him she wasn’t interested I think. That’s not quite the end of the story though. One morning, Natalie turned up to work in a skin tight, black catsuit. I’m not sure she’d been home from another night out. She turned to me and said, “Do you think my outfit is a bit much?”. I didn’t know where to look! Fast forward five years though and I certainly didn’t want to look at Mick Hucknall in his own version of a catsuit!

What’s that?! What about the song? Oh look, “Fairground” will be No 1 soon enough and for 4 weeks so there’ll be plenty of time to discuss it in a future post!

Michael Jackson is No 1 with “You Are Not Alone” for the second and final week. Jackson, like Mariah Carey, recorded for Sony and just as the Songbird Supreme’s (© The Guinness Book of World Records) relationship with the company’s CEO Tommy Mottola deteriorated to the point of divorce, so The King of Pop (© erm…Michael Jackson?) also had issues with him. Big issues. In a 2002 press conference, he called him a racist and held up a picture of Mottola depicted as the devil. Sony refuted the claims and refused to renew Jackson’s contract. In 2020, Kanye West even suggested that Mottola had something to do with Jackson’s death in 2009 in a since deleted tweet though I’m not sure Kanye is the most reliable source of information.

The play out track is “Let’s Spend The Night Together” by the Rolling Stones which was played to advertise the return of TOTP2 as highlighted by Robbie Williams in his final piece to camera but I’m not spending the night or any other time reviewing that one.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	D:Ream	Party Up The World	Nope
2	Cappella	Tell Me The Way	Never
3	Foo Fighters	I’ll Stick Around	I did not
4	Lloyd Cole	Like Lovers Do	I didn’t as it goes
5	Mariah Carey	Fantasy	Nah
6	The Rembrandts	I’ll Be There For You	Yes for my wife but she gave it away to our Friends obsessed goddaughter
7	N-Trance	Stayin’ Alive	As if
8	Simply Red	Fairground	Its a definite no
9	Michael Jackson	You Are Not Alone	And No

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001wc3t/top-of-the-pops-14091995?seriesId=unsliced