TOTP 25 APR 1996

We have arrived at one of the most infamous episodes of TOTP certainly of the 90s, maybe ever. It’s that show with Chris Eubank. Why was he presenting the nation’s favourite music programme? Well, he’d retired from boxing in the September of 1995 having failed to regain his super-middleweight title from Steve Collins. However, he would return to the fight game later in 1996. For now though, he was seen by executive producer Ric Blaxill as a suitable choice for the ‘golden mic’ slot. As far as I can tell he was one of only three sporting celebrities to host TOTP with the others being footballer Ian Wright and jockey Frankie Dettori. All three you could argue have a personality that transcended their sporting fame – Wright is exuberant and Tigger-ish, Dettori is cheeky and likeable and Eubank…well, he’s eccentric if not downright odd. I’m actually quite intrigued to see what he says in his links to camera. Ding! Ding! Round one!

Eubank starts by introducing himself (as if he needed to) by giving us his full nomenclature including his middle name Livingstone. It’s pretty impressive as middle names go but nobody will ever top ex-footballer Emile William Ivanhoe Heskey. He then says something about the forthcoming “goodies” on the show and that he’s feeling “effervescent”. It’s a nervous, stumbling start – he needs to get a few punchy lines in to settle him down. The act he introduces are Babylon Zoo and their second hit of the year “Animal Army”. I said of this song when the video was shown the other week that it had traces of both Oasis and the Stone Roses about it and listening to it again here, I’m even more convinced of that assertion. Try closing your eyes and just listening to this performance – see what I mean? Anyway, Jas Mann has grown a spattering of facial hair and is wielding a guitar for this performance which we never saw during the “Spaceman” weeks. I presume he was trying to establish some musicianship credentials on the hunt for credibility points but I’m not sure he really wins that fight. Following what would turn out to be the third biggest selling single of the year in the UK was always going to be a bout too far but its peak of No 17 was probably a little on the harsh side on reflection. Babylon Zoo would stagger on for one final round before being KO’d when third single “The Boy With The X-Ray Eyes” peaked at No 32.

Eubank looks like he’s on the ropes already, appearing dazed and confused and uttering barely remembered lines instructing us to “enjoy the show”. He needs to rally and quickly. Whilst he takes a break between rounds and gets some encouragement from his corner man, we get a performance of the latest dance hit to cross over from the clubs to the charts. “Keep On Jumpin’” was originally recorded by US disco act Musique in 1978 but didn’t trouble our charts until it was revived by The Lisa Marie Experience who took a version of it to No 7 in the UK Top 40 and to the top of our Dance Chart. Despite their name, this lot were actually two male house DJs Neil Hinde and Dean Marriott (aka D. Ramirez). They would go on to remix tracks for the likes of Sash, Eternal, Robin S and Inner City. “(Keep On) Jumpin’” (no brackets, no points) would be their only chart hit as The Lisa Marie Experience though. I’m assuming that their name was inspired by Lisa Marie Presley, daughter of Elvis and Priscilla, who, at this time, was in the process of divorcing perhaps the most famous person on the planet Michael Jackson. I’m guessing they were hoping to trade subliminally on the news headlines that the couple would have been generating? Is that a known marketing strategy?

As for their hit, they couldn’t get clearance to use a sample of the original track so had to record their own version of the chorus which they do pretty faithfully with convincing disco strings to the fore. Having not been a UK hit in the 70s, the song found itself in the Top 10 twice in the space of a few weeks in 1996 when a much more housed-up version by Todd Terry featuring Martha Wash and Jocelyn Brown peaked at No 8.

Eubank throws a cryptic curveball with his next link, setting the mathematicians in the watching audience a brain teaser – “how long does it take a lady to make that step?”. What was he on about? I can only assume he was referring to the first video of the night for “The Box” by Orbital. In it, actor Tilda Swinton plays an alien-like character who observes Earth and its inhabitants in stop-motion giving the impression that she is operating outside of temporal constructs before disappearing whence she came. It’s all very The Man Who Fell To Earth which apparently was the inspiration for the promo according to its co-director Jes Benstock. Was its stop-motion effect what Eubank was being obscure about in his intro? Another question I have is how famous was Tilda Swinton at this point? I’m thinking not that well known beyond the art house crowd as most of her credits up to this point were for a clutch of Derek Jarman films. This was well before her roles in The Beach, Vanilla Sky and The Chronicles Of Narnia franchise. If my guess is true, then her smaller profile would only have added to her portrayal of the mysterious protagonist of the video.

As for the track itself, “The Box” would become one of Orbital’s bigger hits peaking at No 11. It sounds like the soundtrack to a 60s spy thriller but with a few dance beats thrown in. Maybe the duo of brothers Phil and Paul Hartnoll were in training with their eye on the prize of an actual film soundtrack which they achieved the following year with their reworking of the theme to the 1997 remake of The Saint which gave them their second consecutive No 3 hit following the rather disturbing “Satan Live”. In 2000, they would continue with the soundtrack work when they contributed a track (with Angelo Badalamenti) to the aforementioned The Beach movie.

Eubank’s landing some blows now (or at least he thinks he is) with some more enigmatic words. This time, he says “We live in a country where the minds of the people are manipulated by the press. Think about it”. I mean, he’s not wrong and nearly 30 years later that is still the case but why was he prompted to say that at this time? Was he having a particularly bad time with the tabloids? In his early pugilist career, he hadn’t enjoyed a good relationship with the press who depicted him as arrogant and with ideas above his station with his flamboyant sartorial style and posturing or as his Wikipedia entry puts it ‘the man you love to hate’. After he’d lost his boxing title and was supposedly retired from the fight game, would he have still attracted so much attention? I guess by presenting TOTP he was hardly shying away from the public counting his money in his expensive mansion was he?

Definitely on the covers of the music press would have been Ash who were onto their third (and ultimately biggest) hit in “Goldfinger”. I guess this would have been a breakthrough moment for the band – their first time inside the Top 10 and it came with a single that was released a good six months after their last hit. Momentum could easily have been lost. “Goldfinger” not only consolidated that previous success but went beyond it. To do that, the band had to come up with a bloody good tune and they did that. I used my words carefully there – it’s a good tune but not a great one to my ears in the respect that I think they’ve got better songs. Still better than most of the garbage in the charts though. Watching this performance back, I’m struck by how much Tim Wheeler looks like Vernon Kay? Odd(job).

Eubank is finding his feet now and getting a combination together. He’s not stumbling over his words so much and is addressing the audience in a more direct way informing us that he’s got something next to get us “absolutely freaking” before describing it as a modern day version of “Knees Up Mother Brown”. Who can he be talking about? It’s Technohead of course and their latest hit “Happy Birthday”. Yes, the people who brought us “I Wanna Be A Hippy” thought we could do with another dose of their dumbo brand of high speed, happy hardcore nonsense and duly delivered unto us a second hit. It’s a carbon copy of its infuriating predecessor but that didn’t stop UK punters from buying it in enough numbers to send it to No 18 – just bonkers. That’s also the word I would use for this performance which is a riot of idiots jumping around maniacally for the duration of the ‘song’. And what was the recreation of the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party all about? Ever wondered why the hatter was mad? Well, apparently it was an actual condition arising from the use of mercury in the Victorian era to cure pelts in the hat making process. When the mercury got into the systems of the hat makers, it gave rise to mental health problems including dementia hence the phrase. In terms of Lewis Carroll’s character in Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland, some analysis suggests he was written this way to highlight some of the most irritating and unpleasant traits of human nature. ‘Irritating’ and ‘unpleasant’? Well, that explains it then as “Happy Birthday” by Technohead was nothing if not irritating and unpleasant.

P.S. The Emily who Eubank says happy birthday to in his intro is presumably his daughter Emily whose 2nd birthday it had been six days before this TOTP aired.

Oh dear. Eubank makes a misstep in his next intro although in 1996, I’m not sure his choice of words would necessarily have tripped him up. Would we have winced at him describing Louise Werner of Sleeper as “an absolute tottie” back then? I like to think I would have but I can’t be sure. Also, would Eubank’s Nicholas Parsons reference have hit home with the TV audience in 1996? The game show that Parsons presented that shared its name with Sleeper’s single ran from 1971 to 1983 so had been off our screens for 13 years by this point. I think that particular punch line might have failed to hit its intended target.

Just like Ash earlier, Sleeper were at a pivotal moment in their career with the release of their first Top 10 single “Sale Of The Century”. Also just like Ash, it came six months after their last hit so it was an important moment momentum wise. In terms of the song itself, it was arguably just more of the same Sleeper sound that previous hits “Inbetweener” and “What Do I Did Now?” had established. That shouldn’t be seen as a criticism though. They had a successful formula and were giving the people what they wanted. What’s that? Couldn’t the same argument be applied to Technohead? Erm…no. Why not? Well…I didn’t like them did I? That’s fair enough isn’t it? I think it is. Interestingly, Louise Werner doesn’t have her guitar with her for this performance and she seems a bit lost without it. Not knowing quite what to do with herself, she resorts to a few skip and jump movements. She should have floated around the stage Muhammad Ali style, throwing a few jabs, ducking and weaving. I’m sure Chris Eubank would have been even more enamoured with her than he already was.

It’s round seven and Eubank rallies with an intro that sits well with the esoteric, faux-existential quotes he specialises in. It also shows that he knew something of the band he was introducing. “Now here’s a group to make you philosophise and think” he pronounces before the Manic Street Preachers fill our screens. There’s no doubting that the Welsh rockers have a canon of work that displays a certain intellectual rigour with their influences ranging from Nietzsche to Camus to Chomsky and much wider. Was it possible that Eubank was a Manics fan or just that he’d done his research? Whatever Eubank’s truth, the band were telling us that theirs was that they were definitely still a going concern despite the disappearance of Richey Edwards via the success of “A Design For Life”. Ironically, the song’s best known lyric – “We don’t talk about love, we only wanna get drunk” – in which the band highlight the working class’s right to do so, would be sung back to them by crowds of middle class festival goers. Think about that as Chris Eubank might have said.

OK, we nearly at the KO moment for Eubank. The moment when Chris is dealt a blow he can’t recover from. When the BBC4 audience, with our prior knowledge of what’s coming, look on with a building sense of schadenfreude until suddenly it’s here…and Chris Eubank has to introduce Suggs singing “Cecilia”. Why was this a big deal? Because of our host’s lisp of course – it’s not a great look is it? Taking the piss out of a speech impediment. Six years on from this, Gareth Gates would win the hearts of the public on Pop Idol with his singing and looks but also because of his determination to not let his stammer prove too big an obstacle in his pursuit of becoming a pop star and recording artist. I guess Eubank’s perceived arrogance and eccentric demeanour meant he was never going to be afforded the same reaction.

His intro for the actual performance by Suggs and Louchie Lou and Michie One of “Cecilia” has him on the ropes but the knockout blow comes during the Top 10 countdown when he has to say “At six, Cecilia by Suggs”. That moment was used in an episode of Never Mind The Buzzcocks in the a round called Freeze Frame which was basically a What Happened Next? section…

Go to 3:40 in for the “At thickth, Thethilia by Thughth” moment

Mark Morrison is still in pole position at the top of the charts and he’s still got his rather creepy handcuffs with him. The recurrent line “you lied to me” combined with Morrison’s style of delivery has made me ponder that “Return Of The Mack” is what you get if you combined “Ain’t No Doubt” by Jimmy Nail (“she’s lying”) with “It Wasn’t Me” by Shaggy. What a thought!

After the Suggs KO, the defeated Chrissy boy gives a reflective speech about being true to yourself before signing off with a cheery “Good bloody show”. To paraphrase Chumbawamba, you can knock Eubank down but he’ll always get up again. The play out song is something of an oddity called “That’s Nice” by Minty. If you don’t remember it (as I don’t), it’s probably because it never charted as far as I can tell. Yes, it’s another of those left field Ric Blaxill choices where he championed a track that would not actually become a Top 40 hit.

Minty was a vehicle for Australian performance artist, club promoter, fashion designer and friend of Boy George, Leigh Bowery. Wikipedia tell me that Minty were part of the Romo movement which I’d never heard of but which was short for Romantic Modernism and was characterised by a hotchpotch of musical genres including disco, glam rock and the New Romantics with its base camp being the club night Club Skinny in Camden. This track was a posthumous release as Bowery died from an AIDS related illness on New Year’s Eve 1994 though the project continued under the leadership of his long term female partner Nicola Bateman. I’m guessing now but was Leigh Bowery the inspiration for the character of Vulva from Spaced?

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Babylon ZooAnimal ArmyNot for me but for a friend. Honest!
2The Lisa Marie Experience(Keep On) Jumpin’No
3OrbitalThe BoxNot for me thanks
4AshGoldfingerNo but I have it on their Intergalactic Sonic 7″s compilation album
5TechnoheadHappy BirthdayAs if
6
Sleeper
Sale Of The CenturyLiked it, didn’t buy it
7Manic Street PreachersA Design For LifeNo but I had the Everything Must Go album
8Suggs featuring Louchie Lou and Michie One CeciliaNah
9Mark MorrisonReturn Of The MackNope
10MintyThat’s NiceAnd no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0020ldh/top-of-the-pops-25041996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 18 APR 1996

Who the heck is / was Beertje Van Beers? Why? Because she’s hosting this TOTP and I, for one, haven’t a clue as to why. Hang on, she’s not the singer with Technohead of “I Wanna Be A Hippy” fame is she?

*checks internet*

No, I don’t think so. I’ll have to do some more research.

*checks internet again*

Well, it seems I wasn’t the only person confused but inevitably someone had the answer…

Right so basically she was Bis in presenter form? Anyway, the first artist tonight are The Wildhearts who were a favourite of TOTP executive producer Ric Blaxill according to the tweet above which seems to accuse him of employing some favouritism when it came to the running order. Is that fair? Well, let’s look at the evidence. The Wildhearts were no strangers to the charts having had five UK Top 40 hits to this point though only one had made it into the Top 20. This single – “Sick Of Drugs” – would become their biggest when it peaked at No 14 so they were on an upwards trajectory which would add weight to the claim that a place on TOTP was justified. The counter argument would be that those chart positions were inflated by the band being shoe horned onto the show and benefiting from the exposure. Where lies the truth? I think I’ll leave (literally) the final word on this to the band’s lead singer Ginger who says at the end of the performance “If you wanna hear the rest of the song go and buy the single”. The full track clocks in at 4:43 in length but this TOTP performance is about 2:30 long. I think Ginger’s frustration at being cut short suggests the band were not in receipt of preferential treatment from Ric Blaxill.

Now to another artist who wasn’t revelling in huge hit singles. However, she was positively ripping it up when it came to albums sales. Alanis Morissette’s “Jagged Little Pill” had been in UK charts since August of 1995. However, it didn’t make it into the Top 10 until January of the following year. That slow burn was possibly due to the fact that it hadn’t furnished any massive hits with the three singles taken from it up to that point having peaked at Nos 22, 24 and 26. Respectable but not the kind of numbers to propel an album into the stratosphere. However, playing the long game would prove to be a much more successful strategy ultimately. Word of mouth promotion and an organic growth of the album would see it spend 41 consecutive weeks inside the Top 10 once it had got there with 11 of them at No 1. This was quite the phenomenon. Compare that to say Babylon Zoo’s album which crashed into the chart at No 6 off the back of the enormous “Spaceman” single but which was out of the Top 40 within a month, never to be seen again. With sales of “Jagged Little Pill” showing no signs of tailing off, a fourth single was released from it and this one would not only be the second highest charting of the six ultimately take from it but also the most infamous of them.

“Ironic” is a great tune based around a simple yet effective narrative but unfortunately for Alanis, her choice of title for the song didn’t match what she was singing about. Much cultural analysis has gone into dissecting the lyrics of “Ironic” and pointing out that the scenarios depicted in the song are not examples of irony but rather just bad luck. Such criticism opened the song up to parody, the king of which, “Weird Al” Yankovic, was always going to join in the pile on which he duly did with his song “Word Crimes”. Perhaps the most famous take down of it though came courtesy of Irish comedian Ed Byrne:

Ed made a career for himself out of that skit! Had we all noticed the irony of a lack of irony in a song about irony back in 1996 though? If we did, I don’t remember it. That Ed Byrne clip came from a Channel 4 show broadcast in 1999. In fairness to Alanis, she took it all on the chin and even extracted the piss out of herself in this updated performance of the song on The Late Late Show With James Corden in 2015:

Time to check in on how Bertje Van Beers doing as host? Well, she’s enthusiastic, I’ll give her that. Perhaps ever so slightly the wrong side of annoying? Maybe. Her next link is for a live by satellite performance by Presidents Of The United States Of America and their biggest hit “Peaches”. This is a great left field song which, like “Ironic” before it, created a bit of discussion about its lyrics. Unlike “Ironic”, said discussion was of a much baser nature. Now I just thought this was a quirky song about a guy who liked to eat peaches. However, there is a school of thought that it’s actually about eating something altogether different. I’ll say no more than that.

Lead singer Chris Ballew though says it was inspired by overhearing a homeless man walk past him muttering “I’m moving to the country, I’m gonna eat a lot of peaches” over and over. Apparently that line could have been inspired by a song by John Prine called “Spanish Pipedream”…

Blow up your TV, throw away your paper

Go to the country, build you a home

Plant a little garden, eat a lot of peaches

Try an’ find Jesus on your own

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Jeffrey Bradford Kent / John Prine
Spanish Pipedream lyrics © Walden Music, Inc.

So there’s that but there’s also a second part to the inspiration for the song also from Ballew who recounts going to the house of a girl he fancied whilst under the influence of recreational drugs, finding her not at home and so waiting for her sat under a peach tree, having an hallucinogenic experience whilst crushing fallen peaches in his hands. I think I’ll choose to go with Ballew’s story as to what the song’s about. Not everyone agrees though. Here’s Captain D from Cincinnati on the Songfacts.com website:

I’m a pervert so I thought it was sexual too

Well, I guess the Captain is honest at least. The Presidents Of The USA would have two more UK hits before disbanding in 1997. “Peaches” remains their signature hit though. Such was its renown that it even permeated our culture to the point that the character of Hank from King Of The Hill knew it:

Everything But The Girl have finally moved on from “Missing” after it stayed in the charts for six months but they weren’t leaving their new direction behind them. “Walking Wounded” (both the single and album) saw the duo continue to embrace dance beats and in particular those of a drum and bass variety that were ripping up the nation’s dance floors and starting to enter the mainstream. Whilst their repositioning of themselves as a dance act no doubt won them some new admirers, I wasn’t one of them. I’d grown up with the Ben and Tracey era of “Each And Everyone” and the wonderful “Baby, The Stars Shine Bright” album, not this electronica, trip-hop material. I just couldn’t get into it. Sure, I could appreciate “Missing” for its musicality that could see it be effective as both an acoustic ballad and dance anthem but did I want to hear an Everything But The Girl album that went further than that? No thanks. The record buying public disagreed with me of course sending the album to No 4 and a platinum certification selling three times as many copies as predecessor “Amplified Heart”. However, it could be argued that this new direction only brought short term gains. Follow up album “Temperamental” continued the dance experiment but received a lukewarm reception and sales. Appearing in 1999, it would be the last Everything But The Girl album for nearly a quarter of a decade with the band’s output becoming mired in a haze of Best Of compilations and collections. Their legacy deserved better.

After a terrible decade so far in terms of his legal battle with Sony over the fairness of his recording contract, 1996 was turning out to be a splendid year for George Michael. Sure, he’d had two No 1s (a duet with Elton John and his version of “Somebody To Love” from The Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert) but he lost that litigation with the court wholly rejecting his claims of restraint of trade. However, when Sony sold his contract to Virgin in 1995, he was able to resume his career and he did so in some style. “Jesus To A Child” gave him his first truly solo UK No 1 since 1986’s “A Different Corner” and he followed it with a second chart topper in “Fastlove”. Based around an interpolation of Patrice Rushen’s 1982 hit “Forget Me Nots”, it was a stark contrast from the haunting balladry of its predecessor, a funk-based number celebrating one night stands over committed relationships. The track had a very sophisticated, highly polished production sound to it with the saxophone part played by Andy Hamilton who was responsible for the memorable saxophone break in Duran Duran’s “Rio”. Somehow, the BBC censors missed George singing the line “all that bullshit conversation” at the start of the song.

The B-side was a funked up but slowed down version of “I’m Your Man” showing that George hadn’t totally turned his back on his rich pop past. Although it’s hard to beat the effervescence of the Wham! original, the ‘96 remake is definitely worth a listen:

The song’s futuristic video gave George the opportunity to have a dig at Sony re: the aforementioned court case with one of the promo’s dancers wearing a set of headphones displaying the word ‘FONY’ in the style of the Sony corporate logo. That didn’t stop it from being nominated for three MTV Music Video Awards winning the one for International Viewer’ Choice. Watching it back now, it seems to draw inspiration from the film Logan’s Run, in particular the scene where Logan meets Jessica on ‘the circuit’, the tinder of 2274:

As with a few artists, I kind of lost touch with The Cranberries after a while. I’d enjoyed their early hits and had been to see them live in October of 1994 I think but by 1996, they’d definitely slipped off my radar. “Salvation” was the lead single from their third album “To The Faithful Departed” and was definitely more in the vein of “Zombie” than “Linger”. It would become their joint biggest hit when it peaked at No 13 which seems an awfully low bar for a band that turned out a few cracking hits. I guess they were more of an albums band?

Featuring Dolores O’Riordan stomping all over the track with a strident vocal and almost shouted chorus, “Salvation” was seen as an anti-drug song though Dolores herself described it more as anti anything that took control of you. Sadly for her, she was unable to live by the lyrics of her song and was found dead in 2018 in a hotel room in Mayfair, London with the inquest ruling that she had died by accidental drowning following sedation by alcoholic intoxication.

Here’s something unusual – a controversial Michael Jackson single. I jest of course. Jacko’s whole life (and death) was surrounded by controversy. However, “They Don’t Care About Us” was certainly up there for generating a storm of headlines. The fourth single taken from the “HIStory: Past, Present And Future, Book 1” album, it attracted unwanted (by Jackson) attention both for its lyrics and video. The former were accused of being anti-Semitic with its use of the phrases “Jew me” and “Kike me” which Jackson strenuously denied and, indeed, agreed to re-record the track for subsequent copies of the album with the offending phrases replaced with “sue me” and “strike me”. In the end though, they were just covered up with some abstract noises – you can hear said sounds in the video shown on this TOTP.

The video was filmed in a favela or ghetto in Rio de Janeiro and caused concern for their Secretary of State for Industry, Commerce and Tourism who was worried showing the poverty in the area would adversely affect tourism and Rio’s bid to host the 2004 Olympics. A judge banned the filming of the video but a counter injunction saw it go ahead. Some supported Jackson’s claim of highlighting the poverty in the area whilst others criticised his production team for negotiating with local drug dealers for permission to film in the favela. It’s interesting to note that we only get about 2:20 of the video shown here where in the past TOTP have devoted huge sections of their half hour to showcasing a Jacko exclusive. Could they have been put off by the negative press? As for the song itself, its samba beat and chant like chorus actually make it stand out for me within Jackson’s catalogue – was the “hooo-aaargh” shout halfway through the song and attempted by Beerjte Van Beers in her intro the impetus for Leigh Francis to choose Jackson for one of his outlandish BoSelecta! characters?

The caption accompanying this performance by The Cure says that they haven’t been on TOTP since April 1990. That can’t be right can it? They’d had five Top 40 hits since then. Didn’t any of those justify an appearance on the show? Anyway, “The 13th” was the lead single from the “Wild Mood Swings” album and well, I’m sorry but it’s awful. The Cure do Mariachi? No thanks.

The album was not well received by fans or the music press and it was the band’s poorest selling for 12 years. Even Robert Smith himself has said that he was disappointed with it – maybe he should have taken more heed of the lyric he sang in “The 13th” of “I just know this is a big mistake”. I recall that we didn’t sell many at all in the Our Price where I was working at the time. Though they would never regain their commercial edge, the band are still together and were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2019 which gave us this marvellous Robert Smith moment…

Mark Morrison has completed his slow slither up to the No 1 position with “Return Of The Mack”. It’s taken six weeks to get there which was an eternity in 1996 when we were used to singles debuting in the top spot in week one. True to his dubious character, he sidles up to Beertje Van Beers at the end of his performance and drags her away with him as the credits roll. Maybe this was cooked up between the pair of them pre-show but even if it was, it looks terrible especially through 2024 eyes.

For the first time in a while, we have a play out video of a current chart hit rather than a clip from the archives to promote TOTP2. In this case, we get a football song but not that one. Yes, in 1996 if your single about the beautiful game wasn’t called “Three Lions” then it was destined to be forgotten. Who remembers “Move Move Move (The Red Tribe)” by The 1996 Manchester United FA Cup Squad? Well, you might if you’re a United fan I guess but when it’s not as memorable as the odious “Come On You Reds” from 1994, then you know the game is up. For the record, it was a horrible Reel 2 Real facsimile which is never a good thing.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1The WildheartsSick Of DrugsNegative
2Alanis MorissetteIronicNo but I had the Jagged Little Pill album
3Presidents Of The United States Of AmericaPeachesNo but I had it on one of those Best Album Ever compilations
4Everything But The GirlWalking WoundedDidn’t happen
5George MichaelFastloveNope
6The CranberriesSalvationIt’s a no from me
7Michael JacksonThey Don’t Care About UsI did not
8The CureThe 13thNah
9Mark MorrisonReturn Of The MackNo
10The 1996 Manchester United FA Cup SquadMove Move Move (The Red Tribe)Never

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0020crt/top-of-the-pops-18041996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 11 APR 1996

I’ve reached another blogging milestone – this is my 600th post over my 80s and 90s TOTP sites combined. Thank you to anyone and everyone who has ever taken the trouble to read any of them. 600 eh? Phew! When I started back in 2017 with the 1983 BBC4 repeats, I didn’t have any such goal in mind. In fact, I wasn’t sure I would even make it to the 1984 repeats but make it I did and seven (actual) years later, I’m still at it but with an end in sight as I won’t go past the year 2000 (as Busted almost sang). The 600th episode of TOTP was on 9th October 1975 but I was only seven then so don’t remember it at all. For the record though, it featured The Sparks, Bob Marley and David Essex at No 1. As for other 600th episodes, that landmark was reached in EastEnders on 6th November 1990 by which point I’d only just got married and moved to Manchester two weeks before so watching the latest escapades of Phil and Grant Mitchell probably wasn’t high on my list of things to do. The 600th episode of Coronation Street was broadcast on 12th September 1966 two years before I was born. Let’s see if any of the artists and hits in my own 600th anniversary are worth celebrating…

Well, if it’s a celebration we’re having then I guess we should start with a party tune and “Ooh Aah…Just A Little Bit” by Gina G is definitely that. This is her third consecutive week on the show and in the studio so the BBC couldn’t be accused of not getting behind our Eurovision entry this year. Now, in the last post I mentioned that I had a Gina G story. It’s time for it to be told. Around this time, Ricky Ross, having broken up Deacon Blue, was launching his solo album “What You Are” and the Sony rep who used to sell into the Our Price I was working in got all the staff on the guest list for an album launch party at a bar in Manchester. There was a free bar at the party and many, many drinks were consumed. I actually had a five minute chat with Ricky who was a nice bloke.

What’s this got to do with Gina G? Well, I also got talking to some guys who said they were the people behind “Ooh Aah…Just A Little Bit” but that they weren’t getting any royalties from it and were taking legal action or something. That’s about all I can remember (it was a free bar after all!) but searching online nearly thirty years later to see if there was anything in what they told me, I found that there was loads of legal action surrounding the song. Gina G reckoned she was owed over £136,000 for her part in its success while another case was launched by one Simon Taube who wrote the song and it was recorded by Gina with two producers called Wainwright and Burton who went under the alias of The Next Room. Enter one Stephen Rodway to the story as the new producer for the track who went under the professional name of Motiv-8. A deal was signed between Taube and Rodway giving the latter 30% of any royalty payments. However, said royalties were all collected by Rodway’s production company FX leading to Taube and the original producers suing FX for £408,000. Were those guys at that album launch that I spoke to Taube, Wainwright and Burton? Did they ever receive all of what they thought they were owed? Or even just a little bit?

How long has this been going on Paul? Seven years and 600 posts mate! Keep up! Seriously though, I love Paul Carrack’s voice and he’s written some pop classics but I’m not sure why one of them was back in the charts in 1996. “How Long” was originally a No 20 hit for his band Ace in 1975 but apparently it was reactivated 21 years later for Paul’s solo album “Blue Views” and reissued to promote it. It would peak at No 32 one place below the cover of it by the Yazz/Aswad collaboration from 1993. For such a timeless track, those chart peaks seem slightly underwhelming but justice arrived in 2020 when, 45 years after its original release, its use in an advertisement for Amazon Prime prompted 4,000 downloads, 831,000 streams and the No 1 spot in the Billboard Rock Digital Song Sales chart.

Although widely perceived to be a song about infidelity between a couple, it was actually written by Carrack when he found out that Ace bassist Terry ‘Tex’ Comer had been secretly working with Scottish folk-rock duo The Sutherland Brothers. By strange coincidence, also released the same year was “Make Me Smile (Come Up And See Me)” by Steve Harley and Cockney Rebel which was another song about band disharmony. When members of the original Cockney Rebel approached Harley about their desire to write songs for the band, he refused and the band split with Harley forming a new group. Hitting the top spot with their first release under their new moniker, the song was a jibe at the original Cockney Rebel members who Harley believed had done him dirty by trying to change a winning formula.

Just like “How Long”, “Make Me Smile (Come Up And See Me)” has been covered by many artists including Duran Duran, Erasure and The Wedding Present whose performance of it here includes David Gedge looking exactly like me 35 years ago – or is it me looking like Gedge?

I’ve never been much of a rap /hip-hop fan but I know a good tune when I hear one and “California Love” by 2Pac featuring Dr.Dre and Roger Troutman is a good tune. His first release since being…well…released from prison in 1995, it features amongst others a sample from “Woman To Woman” by Joe Cocker (not Jarvis’s Dad) and would top the US charts while making it to No 6 in ours. Its hook though is surely the ‘golden throat’ vocal in the chorus courtesy of Roger Troutman who sounds like a character from Viz but was actually a singer, songwriter, producer and all round pioneer of the funk movement. The aforementioned ‘golden throat’ sounds like a porn film title but was actually a custom made ‘talk box’ / vocoder supplied by electronics firm Electro Harmonix which he also used to contribute vocals to the Scritti Politti single “Boom! There She Was” in 1988. Then there’s the legendary Dr. Dre’s involvement which supposedly led to the falling out between himself and 2Pac. The latter, of course, would be dead within six months, murdered as part of the East Coast-West Coast hip-hop rivalry (unless you believe the conspiracy theories that he faked his own death). Rumours circulated that former friend turned rival Notorious B.I.G. was involved in 2Pac’s murder but then he was killed himself in 1997 in another Las Vegas drive by shooting. All of these artists would become a source of exasperation to me whilst working in Our Price as their albums would attract the white, middle class gangs from da hoods of Cheshire who would try and nick their CD sleeves for the parental guidance warning lyrics printed inside them. We had to replace them with temporary inserts and keep the real thing behind the counter.

Both Dr. Dre and Notorious B.I.G. continue to feature in my life as a source of inspiration for in jokes between myself and my wife. Whenever one of us says that we’ve forgotten something, it will be followed by a cry of “Forgot about Dre” referencing his 2000 single with Eminem and which Mark and Lard satirised on their Radio 1 show. Notorious B.I.G. was also known as Biggie Smalls which gets a regular shout out if one of us says “no biggie” as in “it’s not a big deal”. We sound insufferable don’t we but we’re not really – honest!

Here’s a band that was lumped in with the Britpop movement whether they liked it or not but are hardly talked about anymore despite having a clutch of decent tunes. If Longpigs are mentioned these days, it’s usually to say that they included a young Richard Hawley in their ranks (he’s the guitarist on the left of the screen) and he, of course, would go onto much solo success as a ballad crooner with albums like “Coles Corner” and “Lady’s Bridge”. He was also briefly a member of Pulp after Longpigs split. I’ve seen him a couple of times live and he was great.

Back to Longpigs though and “On And On” (not a tribute to the longevity of this blog!) was their second and joint biggest hit of their career alongside the excellent follow up “She Said”. Weirdly, just as I mentioned Aswad earlier for their version of “How Long” with Yazz, I get to name check them again as they also had a hit with a song called “On And On” in 1989 though obviously not the Longpigs song.

No, it’s not that moment (not yet) but it is Suggs with his cover of the Simon & Garfunkel song “Cecilia”. I’ve always had a soft spot for Madness and have even seen them live but Suggs as a solo artist? No, nay, never. I didn’t like any of his solo singles (not even “Blue Day” with my beloved Chelsea FC) and haven’t enjoyed his performances on these TOTP repeats. I’m not sure why Suggs on his own is such a turn off for me – maybe it’s the hackneyed layer of ska he applies to all his songs which annoys, especially on cover versions like this. He’s roped in Louchie Lou and Michie One for this single whom you may recall had a ragga-fied hit in 1993 with a version of one of the worst songs in the history of recorded music – Lulu’s “Shout”. I don’t think their contribution helped at all. However, given that they are on the record and in the studio with Suggs, why did they need the other two backing dancers for this performance? They don’t add anything much either although in reality, no amount of intervention could fumigate this stinker.

Yes, Babylon Zoo did have another hit and here’s the proof. “Animal Army” was the follow up to “Spaceman” and nearly 30 years later, it doesn’t stand up well at all. It probably needed crutches in that department even back then. You can see what Jas Mann was trying to do; repeat the recipe that made its predecessor such a banquet of a hit but without the magic ingredient of the exposure of a Levi’s ad campaign, it was always going to taste a bit bland. It feels like it should have been better than it was, that all the flavours were there but it wasn’t quite right – it had been overcooked. In the mixing bowl was a bit of glam rock, a hint of Suede, even a dash of Stone Roses and Oasis in the vocal phrasing but the lyrics were utter tosh about elephants, lions, leopards and then bizarrely dinosaurs and angels. Just nonsense. The inclusion of some elephant trumpet noises at one point is a direct steal from the opening of Talk Talk’s “Such A Shame”. So, in conclusion, very derivative and ultimately not very convincing. It would debut at No 17 but was out of the chart within two weeks. It was a similar story everywhere else. The Babylon Zoo story was coming to an end only weeks after it had started.

Talking of derivative, this single by Upside Down sounds so familiar to something else but I can’t quite put my finger in what it is*. “Every Time I Fall In Love” was the second hit for this lot who were perhaps the ultimate in manufactured boy bands with their audition and selection process filmed for the BBC documentary series Inside Story. If this was the sound of falling in love, it was enough to make us all platonic. Plastic, shallow and facile. I can’t find a clip of this studio performance but they’ve turned up in different coloured silk suits but getting dressed themselves was clearly beyond them as they’ve forgotten their shirts underneath their suit jackets. It’s like Showaddywaddy meets The Chippendales. Sadly, Upside Down had another two hits in them before they disappeared and renamed themselves Orange Orange. No, really.

*Update: I think it might be “The Girl Is Mine” by Michael Jackson?

Next an allegorical song for the ages from Rage Against The Machine. The lead single from their second album “Evil Empire”, “Bulls On Parade” warns of how the arms industry encourages war and conflicts as it’s good for business and securing military contracts. RATM pull no punches about their disgust at the practice with lines like these:

Weapons not food, not homes, not shoes

Not need, just feed the war cannibal animal

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Brad Wilk / Timmy Commerford / Tom Morello / Zach De La Rocha
Bulls on Parade lyrics © Wixen Music Publishing

Nearly thirty years later, the world appears to have learned nothing. There’s no space here for pithy irreverence from me. I’ll leave it there.

I’m not giving any devastating insight by stating that there was a lot riding on the release of “A Design For Life” for Manic Street Preachers. This was their first new song since the disappearance of rhythm guitarist and songwriter Richey Edwards. Having made the decision to carry on, there must have been a huge amount of trepidation within the band and their record company about how it would be received. Would the fan base accept them as a trio? Would this new song be too far removed from the dark material of their “Holy Bible” album? They needn’t have worried – “A Design For Life” would give the band the biggest hit of their career and provide them with probably their best known song. There was something about the scale of track that hypnotised. Perhaps it was the dominant but not domineering string section (the same players as employed on the majestic “Yes” by McAlmont & Butler) that gave it such power. You knew it was going to be massive from the first time you heard it and hear it we did as it was played endlessly on radio in a way none of their previous singles had ever been. Parent album “Everything Must Go” would indeed go… three times platinum and furnish the band with four hit singles. Manic Street Preachers had not only survived the loss of a crucial band member but they were actually flourishing in the aftermath.

A few posts ago I wrote about the BBC series This Life and about how its soundtrack was full of contemporary music (mainly Britpop) including the Manics. Ten years after the series finished, a reunion special was made to catch up with the characters and see what had happened to them all. In one scene, they have a barbecue and drink long into the night. The music that they played as they partied? Yep, “A Design For Life”.

It’s a third and final week at the top for The Prodigy and “Firestarter”. The band had experienced plenty of big hits before of course – five of their previous nine singles had gone Top 10 but a No 1 record, even in 1996 when there were more than ever thanks to record company marketing, promotion and pricing strategies, was still a huge deal especially for a band seen as being so far from the mainstream. Incredibly, they would repeat the trick with their next single “Breathe” paving the way for an electric performance at Glastonbury in 1997 which blew me away. Sadly for the band, that year also saw Radiohead play the set of their lives there the following night which rather stole some of their thunder but it shouldn’t diminish the achievement of a band whose first hit was dismissed as having creating the much maligned toy town techno genre.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Gina GOoh Aah…Just A Little BitNope
2Paul CarrackHow LongI did not
32Pac featuring Dr.Dre and Roger TroutmanCalifornian LoveNo
4LongpigsOn And OnDecent tune but no
5Suggs featuring Louchie Lou and Michie OneCeciliaNever!
6Babylon ZooAnimal ArmyNah
7Upside DownEvery Time I Fall In LoveAs if
8Rage Against The MachineBulls On ParadeWorthy but no
9Manic Street PreachersA Design For LifeNo but I had the Everything Must Go album
10The ProdigyFirestarterAnd no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0020crr/top-of-the-pops-11041996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 04 APR 1996

Four days before this TOTP aired, my beloved Chelsea lost an FA Cup semi-final to Manchester United who were on their way to the ‘double double’. I was crushed. After waiting my whole life to see them play in a proper cup final, they’d got humped 4-0 by United two years before. In 1996 though, I was sure that we would get revenge and turn the reds over to reach the final again. We nearly did. Leading 1-0 at half time we looked good until an early second half equaliser and a catastrophic misplaced back pass to set up a young David Beckham for the winner meant that we fell to defeat. I had no idea at the time but a year later, my anguish would be fully cleansed by our cathartic victory over Middlesbrough in next season’s final under Ruud Gullit and his ‘sexy football’. There are no football songs on this edition of TOTP but maybe there are some sexy ones? Let’s see…

Well this guy clearly thinks he’s sexy but…As with last week’s show, we start with a dance tune by an act that’s probably just the pseudonym for a DJ or producer or both. Kadoc were from Spain according to tonight’s host Dale Winton and that’s all there is to say about them or at least that I can be bothered to find out about them. I did try but there wasn’t much coming up other than I recognised the generic design on the cover of the single that was the mark of the Positiva record label who must have licensed it in the UK.

As for their track “Night Train”, it sounds to me like another one of those tracks that owes a lot to “French Kiss” by Lil Louis. A repetitive beat based around a one line lyric – it might have made sense on a sweaty dance floor down your nightclub of choice but it all looks a bit silly in the TOTP studio despite throwing a trio of backing dancers at it to try and raise the temperature of the performance. Look, if you’re going to do a song called “Night Train” on TOTP, let the late, great Steve Strange and co show you how. Backing singers missing their cues, jerky, unrehearsed dance moves from Steve and all cloaked in enough dry ice that wouldn’t be out of place in John Carpenter’s horror classic The Fog. Lovely stuff.

I’m not sure if Ocean Colour Scene have ever been described as ‘sexy’ (maybe they have by the strong devoted in their fan base) but it’s not the first word you would use to describe them is it? That’s not a criticism – they always seemed like a band that were more about their art than air brushed photo shoots anyway. Having scored their first Top 40 hit with previous single “Riverboat Song”, they followed it with an even bigger one in “You’ve Got It Bad”. This is yet another single that I haven’t retained in my memory banks. I could have bet money that the magnificent “The Day We Caught The Train” was the follow up to “Riverboat Song” but yet again these TOTP repeats delight in revealing to me how my memory is failing me. In my defence, “You’ve Got It Bad” isn’t one of the band’s better tunes – I think I would describe it as ‘competent’ which isn’t really how you would want your craft to be categorised.

Dale Winton mentions in his intro that the band’s next live gig is supporting Oasis. Would that be the Maine Road gigs at the end of the month? I think it might be. As I confessed in a previous post, I was at the Saturday concert with some friends but missed seeing Ocean Colour Scene as we were still imbibing some pre-gig drinks when they were on stage. In August this year I will be rectifying that wrong when I will see the band along with Embrace and Cast at an outdoor gig in Hull. Incidentally, Cast were also meant to be in that Oasis bill but had to pull out as their drummer had broken his arm. Couldn’t they have borrowed a replacement from someone like when The Beatles subbed in Jimmie Nicol for a tonsillitis struck Ringo for some gigs on their 1964 world tour? Maybe Oasis could have given them Tony McCarroll’s number whom they’d recently sacked? By the way, it’s taken a while but I’ve finally worked out who lead singer Simon Fowler reminds me of here…

Now, I’m not sure that Dave Grohl is the sexiest man in rock but he has been described as the nicest and that’s got to count for something. His band Foo Fighters were in the charts this week with the fourth and final single taken from their eponymous debut album called “Big Me”. It’s a very radio friendly song definitely at the poppier end of their range and to reflect that, they made a video to promote it that parodied the well known (in America) series of adverts for Mentos Mints. It was based around a narrative that people could solve day-to-day problems by outside-the-box thinking if they ate a Mento Mint to inspire their creativity. The actors in these ads performed in mannered and exaggerated ways (camping it up some might say) against an insanely catchy jingle. The Foo Fighters video apes some of the scenarios in the Mentos adverts scene for scene (the boxed in car for example) with the band also lampooning the acting style. It works pretty well if you know those adverts which of course we didn’t in the UK so we might have appreciated that it was an attempt at being light hearted but the parody element surely escaped us.

So back to Dave Grohl and whether he’s sexy or not. I’m not sure he did himself any favours by styling his long hair into bunches in parts of the video. It gave me real Bill Bailey vibes from that episode of Black Books where they drink the guy’s really expensive wine cellar dry.

Now, was this next hit a blatant and deliberate attempt to cash in on a TV sensation or something that grew organically from the clubs before finally getting an official release? The truth is out there (yes I’m using that tag line again!) but I’m not sure where it is. Apparently, some club DJs had been playing the X Files theme as a chill out track for ravers to come down to after a hard night on the dance floor and all that entailed (ahem) but had then also used it as a basis for making unlicensed dance remixes causing Warners to release the official single by Mark Snow in an attempt to kill off the practice. However, it didn’t prevent a retaliatory official release of “X-Files” by DJ Dado whose version had been one of the most popular in the clubs. Dado was an Italian DJ and producer (weren’t they all?) who took the dream trance sound of Robert Miles’ “Children” and combined it with the haunting melody of the TV show theme to come up with this hit that would spend time residing alongside Snow’s original in the Top 10. It would turn out to be DJ Dado’s only UK hit.

If innuendo is all about sex then “Ooh Aah…(Just A Little Bit)” is indeed a sexy song. Gina G’s Eurovision entry has crashed into the charts at No 6, instantly topping the chart high of the previous year’s contestant Love City Groove. Whether this was a portent that it could sweep all before it and take the Eurovision crown for the UK for the first time in 15 years was debatable but it was indisputable evidence that it was going to be a major hit on our chart. Not since Bardo (remember them) in 1982 had a UK entrant been so high up the Top 40 and this is as with the actual contest still being six weeks away when, whatever its fate, the song would surely get another sales boost due to the promotion and coverage of the event. As it turned out, “Ooh Aah…(Just A Little Bit)” would enjoy a spectacular chart run spending a solid ten weeks inside the Top 10.

This particular TOTP has gone backing dancer mad with Gina’s gals being the third set to feature after those behind Kadoc and DJ Dado. Despite a bit of over enthusiastic thrusting of chests, their moves are playful rather than suggestive I would…erm…suggest whilst Gina gives a winning Kylie-esque smile throughout. I have my own personal story about this song but I’ll keep it warming the bench for now as guess what? Gina is the opening act on the next show!

Hmm. Despite his large collection of ballads and love songs in his back catalogue, I’m not sure that the words Lionel Richie and sexy belong together in the same sentence. He’s here anyway to promote his latest single “Don’t Wanna Lose You” but judging by the fade away segue, it’s just a repeat of his studio appearance from the other week. Truly, it’s not a very good song and surely can’t be talked about in the same breath as some of his classic hits. In Lionel’s defence, he’s definitely trying out his best approximation of Lenny Henry’s Theophilius P. Wildebeeste’s character (he’s even cultivated a carefully coiffured beard) and looks longingly straight down the camera but you can’t really get away for the fact that he is, despite everything he’s trying, still Lionel Richie.

Next to a guy who may have been an unlikely sex symbol but his picture was surely on more teenagers walls than Lionel Richie’s. Jarvis Cocker’s national treasure status was never bigger than at this point. Not only had his band Pulp completely crossed over into the mainstream following the success of their “Different Class” album but he’d become front page news after his protest against Michael Jackson at the BRIT Awards a few weeks before this TOTP aired. “Something Changed” was the fourth single lifted from that album and I recall thinking that the band were pushing it releasing a single from an album that had already been out for six months by this point. However, it’s such a good song it deserved its own moment in the spotlight. An observation on the randomness of life and how monumental events in people’s lives occur. Cleverly, it doesn’t eulogise the concept of fate as so many songs do but rather tries to examine the ‘sliding doors’ notion of how your life would have gone in a completely different direction if you’d literally arrived somewhere one minute earlier or later. That idea really intrigues me and I’m sure we can all think of our own personal ‘sliding doors’ moments. I hadn’t realised until now how old the song was in that the band had played around with it as early as 1984 but returned to it for the “Different Class” sessions and worked it into the track we know today. Maybe if they’d persevered with it originally then fame and fortune might have come to the band much earlier than it did. A ‘sliding doors’ moment indeed.

It’s the return of Mark Morrison now as he continues his protracted journey to the No 1 spot with his hit “Return Of The Mack”. He’s up to No 4 this week after spending three consecutive weeks at No 6. Him topping the chart after that run must have seemed unlikely but the two place move upwards was followed by a week at No 3 before he finally got to the summit in week six of release. Whilst we were seeing a new No 1 record going straight to the top virtually every week around this time, it’s worth remembering that there were still some songs that climbed steadily like in the good old days of the 80s. As well as Morrison, there was the aforementioned Gina G who took eight weeks to get to No 1 plus, of course, there was the outlier that was “Think Twice” by Celine Dion that took an incredible sixteen weeks to rise to the top. Totally predictably, Morrison adds to the backing dancer count for this TOTP with a further four in this performance. There was clearly a trend for showing your bra during this period!

The Prodigy remain at No 1 with “Firestarter”. I talked about the video for this one in the last post so now it’s time to focus on the song itself. Well, it couldn’t be more in your face – the musical equivalent of the face hugger from the Alien franchise. A blistering assault on your aural senses. I guess you can’t underestimate the input of Keith Flint to it in what was unbelievably his first vocal contribution to a Prodigy track. It would be like Bez doing lead vocals on a Happy Mondays single and it going to No 1. A remarkable achievement. Sure, Flint didn’t have a technically good voice but what he did do, he did brilliantly. As for the musical composition of the song, there are a few samples in there that I’ve never picked up on before. I’m going to pardon myself for not spotting The Breeders and “Devotion” by Ten City but how on earth did I miss the ‘hey’ chant from Art Of Noise’s “Close (To The Edit)”?! It’s metaphorically been under my nose and literally in my ears for 28 years!

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1KadocNight TrainNever
2Ocean Colour SceneYou’ve Got It BadNo
3Foo FightersBig MeI didn’t
4DJ DadoX-FilesOf course not
5Gina GOoh Aah…(Just A Little Bit)Nope
6Lionel RichieDon’t Wanna Lose YouNah
7PulpSomething ChangedNo but I had the Different Class album with it on
8Mark MorrisonReturn Of The MackNegative
9The ProdigyFirestarterShould have but didn’t

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0020540/top-of-the-pops-04041996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 28 MAR 1996

On the Monday following the broadcast of this TOTP, John Squire released a statement confirming that he had left the Stone Roses. As that date was 1st April, maybe some thought it was an April Fool’s joke but in reality, the writing had been on the wall for some time. The band were in disarray after a number of damaging events – the lukewarm reception to the almost mythical sophomore album “Second Coming”, the departure of Reni and the cancellation of their Glastonbury appearance the year before and the poor reviews for the shows they did play with much of the criticism surrounding the state of Ian Brown’s voice. The Stone Roses would be dissolved by Brown and Mani just a few short months later. Squire would move in to his next project very quickly with The Seahorses claiming a Top 3 hit with their debut release “Love Is The Law” in late April.

Also moving on to something new was the Our Price store in Stockport where I was working. I’m pretty sure it was around this time that we switched over from the old (and antiquated) master bag stock control system to the Virgin ELVIS technology. I think it stood for Electronic Virgin Information System and was quite the advancement from what preceded it. This was a computerised system that would give you daily figures (as opposed to a manual count) for every item that was sold in store meaning that you had much better sales information on which to make reorder decisions about the all important chart titles. Setting it up though was quite an undertaking as everything in the shop needed a barcode attaching to it and scanning into the system. Not only that but the tills had to be changed as well and the staff trained in how to use them. It was quite the transition and required a team of ELVIS trainers to guide us through it and for the store to be shut to the public at some points while the hardware was installed. I wonder which tunes we might have played in the shop stereo to soundtrack our endeavours…

I don’t think “I Need A Lover Tonight” by Ken Doh would have been my first choice. Who the hell was this guy, where had he come from and what did he want? Well, my answers would be that he was a pound shop Haddaway, I don’t know nor care and that he wanted a hit record which he got when this Italian House track from the “Nakasaki” EP went to No 7.

Presumably the whole thing was inspired by the wrestler Kendo Nagasaki who was popular in the 70s. His real name was Peter Thornley who kept up the pretence of his Japanese samurai wrestling character by never being seen without his mask and doing interviews via a representative. A similarly mute approach by Ken Doh would have been appreciated. Ken Doh? I’d rather have Mad Donna…

The curious footnote to pop history that is Bis have themselves an actual, proper chart hit with “Kandy Pop” from “The Secret Vampire Soundtrack” EP after their debut TOTP appearance the other week as the first unsigned *band in the show’s history.

*This wasn’t quite the truth as they were on Glasgow’s Chemikal Underground label

Up to No 25 by this point, it’s a curious song that sounds like an outlier compared to its chart contemporaries back then. Sort of ahead of its time you might say in that it has a new millennium feel to it to my ears. Of course, I might be talking bollocks here; I often do. Here’s evidence of that as my earlier description of them as a musical footnote isn’t really true. Yes, they only had two minor UK Top 40 hits but that doesn’t really tell the whole Bis story. As Alphaville once sang, the band were big in Japan, have released six studio albums, fourteen EPs, seventeen singles, had their music used in The Powerpuff Girls TV series and film and, despite a few years hiatus, are still a going concern today. They haven’t quite made it to the top result if you google Bis though being behind the Bank for International Settlements.

Themes from TV shows as hits in the pop charts, whilst not a weekly occurrence, weren’t unheard of either. There’s “The Theme From M*A*S*H” / “Suicide Is Painless”, Ennis Morricone’s “Chi Mai” from The Life And Times Of David Lloyd George and “I’ll Be There For You” by The Rembrandts from Friends to name but three. However, “The X Files” by Mark Snow felt different to all of the above. Maybe because it was from a sci-fi show and therefore the sound of it was…what?…spooky…eerie…sinister….that its success seemed somehow out of left field. I couldn’t quite imagine people buying it, taking it home and then listening to it. They must have as it went to No 2 in the charts and stayed there for three weeks but it seemed an unlikely activity. Or maybe they weren’t listening to it but bought it as a keepsake or souvenir of the show they loved. In the pre-digital age, access to your favourite show wasn’t as easy to come by. Sure, you could record the episodes off the TV to a VHS tape for repeated viewing or wait until the official videos came out and buy them (and many people did) but all that required effort. Or was it being played in the clubs as a come down tune as the morning dawned and the ravers tried to get themselves together to make the journey home? I guess the truth is out there (ahem) as to the real reason people took to buying this single in such quantities but it probably isn’t anything to do with an alien plot to take over the earth.

The XFiles TV series was first aired in the UK on Sky in January 1994 (Rishi Sunak wouldn’t have known about it then) before being picked up by BBC2 in the September. By March 1996, it was an established phenomenon with the characters of Mulder and Scully imprinted on the national psyche (just ask Catatonia). I watched it occasionally rather than religiously but always enjoyed what I saw. Mark Snow’s theme tune though? I couldn’t imagine feeling the need to listen to (an albeit enhanced) four minute version of it let alone purchase it. Such was the interest in The XFiles and its theme tune though that inevitably other parties saw the opportunity to cash in on it. In a future TOTP repeat, we’ll see DJ Dado with an Italian House version of the song but I’m getting ahead of myself. For now, it was all about Mark Snow and his hit record which by making it to No 2, equalled the chart high of the last instrumental TV theme tune to be a mega smash that being “Crockett’s Theme” by Jan Hammer from Miami Vice in 1987.

When I were a lad, the utterance “ooh-arr” usually meant just one thing – The Wurzels were on TV again. Yes, the Scrumpy and Western band who gave us “The Combine Harvester” and “I Am A Cider Drinker” never seemed to be far from our screens in that long hot summer of 1976. Fast forward twenty years and that phrase (with just a little bit of a spelling tweak) would be adopted for a much higher and nobler use than that of a novelty record – the UK’s Eurovision Song Contest entry! Gina G was the singer chosen to represent us in 1996 despite the fact that she is Australian (the following year we had Katrina And The Waves whose titular Katrina is American also) and although she would finish 8th despite being a pre-tournament favourite with the bookies, her song “Ooh Aah…Just A Little Bit” would become a No 1 record. This would make it the first Eurovision song to top the UK charts since “A Little Peace” by Nicole in 1982 and the first UK entrant not to win Eurovision but become a No 1 since “Congratulations” by Cliff Richard in 1968. Phew! How did this happen then? Well, the Song For Europe people had shown a willingness to depart from the more traditional Eurovision sound with the previous year’s “Love City Groove” track and though that rap experiment failed in terms of winning the contest, it proved that you could go bold without being derided. Hence the following year, another musical direction was chosen that wasn’t a natural fit with Eurovision but which was certainly popular – Eurodance. “Ooh Aah…Just A Little Bit” nailed that sound but added something to make it stand out – an infectious, brain cell kidnapping, almighty hook of a chorus that was simple to the point of nearly being dumb but with a sexual overtone. It was sort of like a more knowing, elder sister of “Saturday Night” by Whigfield really.

Given that the single would stay in the Top 10 for ten consecutive weeks (including seven at either No1, No 2 or No 3) and given that Eurovision wasn’t until the 18th May and this TOTP was still in March, I think I’ll leave it there for now. We’ll be seeing a lot more of Gina G in the forthcoming weeks but to add some symmetry to the post, it should be noted that The Wurzels recorded their own version of “Ooh Aah Just A Little Bit” in 2002 (with the “Ooh Aah” restyled as “Ooh Arr” obviously) from their album “Never Mind The Bullocks, Here’s The Wurzels”. Marvellous!

Just like that other Britpop band Menswear at this time, Cast decided that their fourth single release would be a ballad. Whereas “Being Brave” felt ever so slightly of being contrived and that it had everything thrown at it in the production, “Walkaway” sounded more organic to me. As I said in a recent post, I think Menswear just about pulled it off with their slowie but Cast’s attempt at balladry seemed more natural and effortless. Wistful, contemplative, melancholic yet melodic, it really stood out.

Being chosen to soundtrack a BBC montage to draw a line under England’s semi-final defeat to Germany in Euro 96 didn’t harm the song’s life cycle either. Whoever was putting those vignettes together was clearly a Britpop fan after Shed Seven had been used twice before earlier in the competition. “Walkaway” was an inspired choice though. The devastation the nation felt after Gareth Southgate missed that penalty needed to be acknowledged and assuaged and Cast’s track was just right. The band themselves were away on tour in the US whilst all the fervour and excitement surrounding the tournament was going on and so missed their moment of national recognition. It might just be their most well known tune though not their highest charting hit. That honour would be bestowed on their next release, the non-album single “Flying” which indeed the band were. One thing though; shouldn’t it have been called “Walk Away” not “Walkaway”.

I should have probably mentioned that this is the last show to be hosted by Mark Goodier. He’d made his TOTP debut back in 1988 and although I’ve been quite disparaging about him in the past on this blog, I can appreciate that he was a safe pair of hands. His hair in this episode is very Louis Balfour of The Fast Show’s ‘Jazz Club’. Nice! Also coming to an end were PJ & Duncan. No, sadly they hadn’t decided to stop making music yet but rather that they would now be releasing records under their own names rather than their Byker Grove characters. On reflection, it’s a wonder that the change hadn’t happened much earlier. After all, they had been gone from the CBBC drama for three years by this point. Whatever the reason and circumstances behind the change of moniker, you could see the direction the pair were heading in the direct to camera piece at the top of the show where they inform us that they will be performing on the show tonight from an aircraft hangar at Heathrow Airport on their way to Japan. This presenting lark did seem to come naturally to them. The track they are promoting is the fourth and final single lifted from their “Top Katz” album and it’s a cover of the old Monkees hit “(I’m Not Your) Steppin’ Stone” except the duo have renamed it as purely “Stepping Stone”. Well, at least they were showing some respect for the correct spelling.

I say the old Monkees hit but the song has been covered by many artists including, as Mark Goodier states in his intro, The Sex Pistols but the list also includes Paul Revere & The Raiders and scouse baggy types The Farm. Like most I would guess though, the version I first knew was that Monkees one as it was on a Greatest Hits tape I had when I was only about 10. Back then I was more familiar with them than The Beatles for example due to the repeats of their TV shows that the BBC would air during those aforementioned long summer holidays. As for PJ & Duncan’s version, it’s predictably naff with the first few seconds sounding like a knock off of “Everybody In The Place” by The Prodigy (more of whom later).

How do you define Dubstar? Even the music press at the time struggled. Look at this list of other artists that they were compared to by various publications:

  • Portishead
  • Pet Shop Boys
  • St Etienne
  • Billie Ray Martin
  • Deacon Blue (?!)

Well, if those guys in the know couldn’t decide, what chance do I have? For the record, surveying that list, my first inclination was towards Portishead but on reflection maybe St Etienne is a better choice. Or maybe we should dispense with all such comparisons and judge them on their own merits? Yes, that seems like a better way of doing it. I shall proceed on that basis. “Stars” was a rerelease of their debut single which had peaked at No 40 in 1995 but was given a second chance after the success of “Not So Manic Now” and deservedly so. It’s an affecting, almost beautiful song bestowed with a touch of stardust by the celestial vocals of Sarah Blackwood. Deceptively slight and also substantial at the same time, it rightly became the band’s biggest hit when it peaked at No 15 second time around. There you go. No comparisons to anybody else in that assessment. As for the performance here, Sarah’s commitment to hardly moving is almost Chris Lowe-esque…Oh bugger.

There is a point where I really couldn’t be bothered with Wet Wet Wet anymore. When they burst into the charts in 1987 from seemingly nowhere with a clutch of great pop tunes (albeit with some bits of them pinched from the work of others), I genuinely liked them. Even when they tried to make that jump from pop star to mature artist too quickly with second album “Holding Back The River” I thought they were still OK and then their renaissance under third album “High On The Happy Side” was well deserved as it was a solid pop album. So why and when did my interest wane? It seems obvious now but it was “Love Is All Around”. I didn’t hate it like everyone else seems to be in a rush to say they did these days but after that level of success I guess I maybe thought they didn’t deserve my attention any more. Not that they would have known or cared about my onrushing indifference but still. I know “Julia Says” was the follow up single but after that I couldn’t really tell you what they released. As such, I have zero memory of “Morning” but Wikipedia tells me that it was fifth and final single taken from the “Picture This” album and it peaked at No 16.

Having listened to it back, it wouldn’t be out of place on a Radio 2 playlist today but was this really what the kids wanted back then? I wonder how many albums that “huge record deal” they’d just signed according to Mark Goodier was for? They only managed to release one more before the end of the 90s plus a second Greatest Hits in 2004 for their label Mercury. To be fair to them, drummer Tommy Cunningham left the group for a while over royalty payments and then Marti Pellow had to take time out to deal with his addiction problems. The band are just about still together though seem to be a three piece these days with only Graeme Clark and previously publicity shy guitarist Graeme Duffin remaining from the original combo with former Liberty X member Kevin Simm on lead vocals.

To the new No 1 and what a seismic record it was. Everything about “Firestarter” by The Prodigy screamed headlines whether they were about its sound, Keith Flint, that video and, of course, a show of moral outrage by some of the tabloids. Watching the promo back further the first time possibly since 1996 and it strikes me that it would be hard to explain to anyone who wasn’t around then why it was so shocking but somehow it was. Why was it? Well, it was 28 years ago and in those intervening years, we will have witnessed a lot of shit and maybe we have become desensitised to images that we would have once found shocking or disturbing. Perhaps, if our first view of the video was via this TOTP and that first view came after a very mellow song by those nice Wet Wet Wet boys…well, it would have been a bit of a shock and certainly quite a contrast. Then there’s the fact that it’s all shot in black and white (due to the band blowing most of the budget on an aborted first attempt) and set in a disused London Underground tunnel adding to the sense that we were watching something very sinister. We were still three years away from the black and white ‘footage’ style cinema of The Blair Witch Project but revisiting the “Firestarter” promo through the prism of that film somehow makes the viewing even more unsettling. Then there’s Keith Flint whose performance provoked such a reaction from viewers and the press. The tics and twitches that he constantly shows us gave the impression of someone who was, if not deranged, definitely experiencing some sort of mental breakdown. His Soo Catwoman influenced hairstyle only added to the sense of the unhinged. And then there’s the sound of “Firestarter”…oh hang on, you know what? It’s going to be No 1 for the next two TOTP repeats so I think I’ll leave it smouldering there for now…

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Ken DohI Need A Lover TonightNever
2BisKandy PopNegative
3Mark SnowThe X FilesNo
4Gina GOoh Aah…Just A Little BitNope
5CastWalkawayHow did I walkaway from this one? No it seems
6PJ & DuncanStepping StoneAs if
7DubstarStarsDidn’t but should have
8Wet Wet WetMorningNah
9The ProdigyFirestarterSee 8 above

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m002053x/top-of-the-pops-28031996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 21 MAR 1996

In the last post I mentioned that Ricky Gervais had been the music advisor on the BBC2 show This Life and that much of its soundtrack featured artists that could have been categorised as Britpop. Well, it looks like Ricky could have been advising on the tunes for this TOTP with nearly half of the acts of that genre. Also very much riding that zeitgeist are tonight’s hosts, the then achingly right on Steve Lamacq and Jo Whiley.

We start with one of those Britpop acts Shed Seven who are at the top of their arc popularity wise with their biggest ever hit “Going For Gold”. To mark the occasion, lead singer Rick Witter has channeled his inner Martin Fry from ABC and turned up in a gold lamé outfit (see what he did there?). A few weeks later, as part of the BBC’s Euro 96 coverage, the band would find two of their songs (this one and “Getting Better”) being used to soundtrack trailers for England games. Just as “Going For Gold” was reaching a much wider audience than ever before due to its adoption by BBC Sport, conversely Going For Gold their daytime quiz show hosted by Henry Kelly came to the end of its nine year run just days after the end of the football tournament.

We stick with Britpop as Oasis get another outing despite the fact that “Don’t Look Back In Anger” is no longer at No 1. As with Technohead the other week however, staying in the same position for two weeks as you descend the charts is seen as reason enough to bag a spot on the show. As such, in spite of falling from No 1 to No 2 to No 3 in consecutive weeks, staying at No 3 sees Noel, Liam, Bonehead et al back on our screens. I like the way that Jo Whiley refers to them as “Our friends in the North” thereby giving a nod to the fact that this song was used in the closing scene of the BBCs drama series of the same name that had aired a couple of weeks previously. I seem to be warming to Jo a bit retrospectively having not had too high an opinion of her in the past. This would be the last time we saw Oasis on TOTP for nigh on 18 months when they returned with the “D’You Know What I Mean?” single.

Apart from “Lucky Star” in April 1984, Madonna had an unbroken run of Top 10 hits in the UK stretching all the way until December 1994 and then she had three in 15 months or three out of her last six single releases if you prefer. Starting with “Take A Bow” which only made it to No 16, there then followed “Oh Father” that matched it and finally there was “One More Chance” that peaked at No 11. Another track from her “Something To Remember” ballads collection, this was actually one of three new songs recorded for the project. It’s all very stripped back with only three instruments used on it – acoustic guitar, cello and keyboard. The composite effect is Madge does “More Than Words” by Extreme.

As she was filming for the Evita film when the single was released, there wasn’t time for Madonna to promote the song nor even to shoot a video so we just get a promo of clips from her previous videos slung together, hence Jo Whitley’s comment “A brief history of Madonna, hairdo by hairdo”. I find the whole thing a tad underwhelming if I’m honest. Now, if she’d covered this instead, then I would have taken a lot more notice…

There were perhaps none more Britpop than Menswear and like Shed Seven earlier, this was the peak of their success. After three medium sized hits the previous year, “Being Brave” would give the band their only Top 10 hit. It took a big ballad to do it, dripping with strings and a big ‘bah, ba ba, bah’ chorus but they manage to pull it off. I remember thinking at the time that they were somehow selling themselves and their fans short by releasing a ballad as if they were playing along with the record industry game and not sticking to their principles but on reflection, why shouldn’t they record such a song? They’re the artist, the creative ones, not me – I was just selling their wares working in a record shop.

Johnny Dean looks like he’s been inspired by Bowie’s ‘Thin White Duke’ era image here but, as with the song he’s singing, it all just about works. Menswear would only have one more hit single later in 1996 before they embarked on the disastrous country rock – tinged second album “Hay Tiempo!” which only got released in Japan at the time though it is available on Spotify now. They split in 1998 with a brief relaunch in 2013 but with only Dean as the original member of the new line up. He would subsequently disown that period of the band and having started a new group, it seems that Menswear are officially closed until further notice though a career spanning four CD box set – “The Menswear Collection” – was released in 2020.

There now follows a pair of very middle of the road ballads performed by two very mainstream artists. For all his success both as part of The Commodores and as a solo artist, Lionel Richie hadn’t released a studio album for a whole ten years by 1996. The only material made available under his name in the intervening years had been his incredibly successful Best Of album called “Back To Front” in 1992 and accompanying hit single “My Destiny” but other than that, nowt. In fairness to Lionel, he’d spent much of that time dealing with a highly publicised divorce plus the loss of his father and a close friend. By 1996, he was ready to resume his career and joined forces with those go to soul / R&B producers Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis. The result was the album “Louder Than Words” and its lead single “Don’t Wanna Lose You”. However, Lionel did lose me (if he ever had me in the first place) as this was a sluggish, ambling, slow walk to extinction song whose only possible hope of redemption was that it had a whiff of “No Woman No Cry” about parts of its melody. The album sold moderately at best (ten times less the amount than “Dancing On The Ceiling” did in the UK) prompting his next release to be yet another Best Of in the form of “Truly: The Love Songs” in an attempt to reverse Lionel’s commercial fortunes which it did until his subsequent studio album in 1998 which absolutely bombed. I guess people are just stuck on you(r) old songs Lionel.

The second of those two ballads is “Falling Into You” from Celine Dion. In his intro, Steve Lamacq refers to her as “the skinniest woman in the world”, a comment I don’t think he would get away with today. It was probably ill-advised back then given the rumours of eating disorders that had followed Celine around most of her life. In any case, Steve Lamacq was hardly on the portly side or a picture of glowing health himself back then was he? In 2022, Celine revealed that she had been diagnosed with stiff-person syndrome, a neurological condition affecting her muscles. An Amazon Prime documentary chronicling her illness has just been released.

Were Garbage Britpop? On the one hand you’d have to say absolutely not given that 75% of their line up were American. On the other, their lead singer and focal point of the band was Scottish. Whether they were or not, what is sure is that they were the third band on the show tonight experiencing their biggest ever hit after Shed Seven and Menswear. “Stupid Girl” was the third single to be released from their eponymous debut album and would peak at No 4. It’s also surely their best known song. Built around a drum loop from “Train In Vain” by The Clash, it’s an hypnotic four minute tale of wasted potential with Shirley Manson’s strident, powerful vocal frogmarching rather than leading us through it.

Given that their previous two Top 40 hits had peaked at Nos 29 and 13, “Stupid Girl” going straight in at No 4 must have been a shock to both band and record label especially as the album had been out for a good six months by this point. It would set something of a standard with four of their next five singles going Top 10. Shirley looks great here with her pink dress reviving images of their debut TOTP appearance and that pink feather boa wrapped around her mike stand. So, returning to that original question, to be or not to be Britpop? I don’t know but great pop? Definitely. No maybe about it.

Boxing and pop music are not natural bedfellows. Sure, there’s “Eye Of The Tiger” by Survivor from Rocky III which will be forever synonymous with the fight game and that song “In Zaire” by Johnny Wakelin which was about ‘The Rumble In The Jungle’ match up between Muhammad Ali and George Foreman but generally I would argue, no good can come of them sparring with each other. I’m not talking about the walk on music that boxers enter the ring to as they’re proper tracks that have been co-opted for a different use. Nor do I mean the various boxing playlists to be found on streaming platforms for the same reason. No, I’m talking about when the two worlds properly collide like here…Kaliphz featuring Prince Naseem and “Walk Like A Champion”. This was a hip-hop outfit from Rochdale teaming up with the holder of the WBO Featherweight title, the flamboyant (some may say arrogant) Prince Naseem Hamed. Presumably both thought that they could benefit from such a symbiotic relationship – Kaliphz bagging themselves a bona fide chart hit and furthering their career and Prince Naseem…well…making a few quid I suppose.

The resulting track is, of course, appalling. Naseem was so high on confidence by this point that he even believes a vocal contribution from himself was not just valid but valuable. It wasn’t. Who bought this rubbish? I’m guessing there must have been some hard selling into record shops by the promotion team behind it to get it to No 23. Kaliphz did gain some traction from its success though. At the prompting of DJ and FFRR Records label owner Pete Tong, a move to Jive Records brought a pairing with Pete Waterman. Under his guidance and a name change to Kaleef, they secured a second chart hit when their version of “Golden Brown” by The Stranglers peaked at No 22 later in 1996. Prince Naseem would continue boxing for a further six years winning 36 of his 37 professional bouts.

Prince Naseem wasn’t the first boxer to release a record though. Discounting Billy Joel who was a boxer before moving onto making music, Nigel Benn aka ‘The Dark Destroyer’ released “Stand And Fight” in 1990 with an outfit called The Pack. It wasn’t a hit but I would wager it was a better record than the Kaliphz/Prince Naseem effort. I could be biased though as I have my own personal memory of this track. Back then, I’d just started as a Christmas temp at the Our Price store in Market Street, Manchester. Just a few weeks into my time there, we had a personal appearance from Nigel Benn himself to promote the record. He signed a load of publicity shots (I got one for my brother who was a fan) and we played his song continuously on the shop stereo not that it sold much. There was a photo of him with the shop staff (including a 22 year old me) that appeared in the WH Smith staff magazine which I kept for years but I’ve no idea where it is now.

Of course, there is one example of boxing snd pop music dovetailing beautifully and it comes courtesy of Everything But The Girl whose song…erm…”Boxing And Pop Music” from their 1991 album “Worldwide” is rather beautiful.

It’s a third and final week at the top for Take That with “How Deep Is Your Love”. As this blog will come to an end with the 1999 TOTP repeats, it’s also the last time I’ll be reviewing them. So farewell Gary, Mark, Jason, Howard and Robbie. I couldn’t stand you when you first appeared on the scene even before you were having hits. Working in Manchester at that time, everyone knew about the group’s failed attempts at stardom to the point that when Gary Barlow came into the Our Price store I was working in, a colleague followed him round mouthing “Nobody buys your records” behind his back. How we all laughed. Then, when the joke was on us as they started notching up the hits, I really detested them, dismissing them as manufactured teeny weeny idols only getting success by resorting to 70s cover versions. When “A Million Love Songs” came out, I begrudgingly admitted it wasn’t the worst thing I’d ever heard and had to acknowledge that Barlow had written it himself at least. Following that, their Barry Manilow cover of “Could It Be Magic” was actually pretty good – what was happening? Having got into their stride, the flood of No 1s arrived. Most of them I could do without to be honest though they at least tried for a more mature round on “Sure”. Then came their finest moment for me with “Back For Good” – a truly great pop song with follow up “Never Forget” also…well…memorable. Their reunion ten years later brought more well crafted pop songs and they deservedly reaped success a second time around. I even saw them live at the Old Trafford cricket ground with my sister, standing in for a friend who’d let her down and it was a very enjoyable show. Even losing another member in Jason Orange hasn’t killed them off. Fair play to them I say.

One last thing, we never got to see the frankly bizarre video for “How Deep Is Your Love” on these TOTP repeats so a quick word about it. We may have thought that we’d get a commemorative promo for their ‘last’ single, maybe a montage of their hits or a farewell-themed plot reassuring their broken hearted fans that everything would be OK in the end. How wrong we were.

What we actually got was a tale of kidnapping, the implication of torture and ultimately murder. The band play their parts well as the kidnapped performing the song under duress (especially Barlow) but the video is stolen by the blonde kidnapper played by Paula Hamilton. With disturbing heavy Whatever Happened To Baby Jane eye make up, she makes for a convincing deranged, obsessed fan. Paula has had her own demons in her real personal life. You can read up about her yourself if you want but besides the Take That promo, she is also best known for this memorable advert from 1987:

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Shed SevenGoing For GoldThought I might have but singles box says no
2OasisDon’t Look Back In AngerYES!
3MadonnaOne More ChanceNah
4MenswearBeing BraveNope
5Lionel RichieDon’t Wanna Lose YouAs if
6Celine DionFalling Into YouNever
7GarbageStupid GirlCould have but didn’t
8Kaliphz featuring Prince Naseem Walk Like A ChampionHell no!
9Take ThatHow Deep Is Your LoveNo but my wife had their Greatest Hits CD

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001zyvh/top-of-the-pops-21031996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 14 MAR 1996

Sometimes, things can take a while before they come to fruition, a substantial gestation period before conditions are right for optimum blossoming. In the world of entertainment, we might call it a sleeper hit. In the UK singles chart of 1996, such things were becoming a rarity with singles careering in and out of the Top 40 within a couple of weeks, usually debuting at their peak position before falling away quickly. Songs going straight in at No 1, a complete rarity in the 80s, was becoming a weekly event. In the television industry however, sleeper hits were still a thing. Stretching back to the 70s, Happy Days only became a huge success once the programme makers decided to centre the show around the character of Fonzie. In the 80s, the first series of Blackadder was not a ratings winner until they changed eras and the personality of the title character in Series 2. A similar thing happened with Men Behaving Badly with its popularity soaring once Harry Enfield’s character was replaced by Tony played by Neil Morrissey.

So it was in 1996 with This Life which first aired four days after this TOTP was broadcast. An ensemble piece about a group of 20 something law graduates as they began their careers, it gained little attention when first broadcast. However, with a second series secured, the first was repeated early in 1997 so that it would segue into the second and it started to gain traction both critically and ratings wise. I’m pretty sure that would have been when I started watching it. The show’s success would make stars of the young, mainly unknown cast, none more so than Andrew Lincoln who would eventually become the lead in The Walking Dead phenomenon. This Life featured plenty of contemporary music in it chosen by a pre-fame Ricky Gervais (credited as ‘Music Advisor’) with a heavy Britpop bent. Artists such as Oasis, Pulp, Blur, Suede and Supergrass would all have their songs used. None of those acts are on this episode of TOTP sadly but let’s see who are.

Oh come on! After I’d spent the intro making the case that unlike TV, the Top 40 wasn’t home to any sleeper hits by 1996, the very first song on tonight’s show is just that. “Return Of The Mack” by Mark Morrison would take six whole weeks to get to No 1, the making it the first record to actually climb to the top spot since Michael Jackson’s “You Are Not Alone” the previous September. Not only that, it also took its own sweet time descending the charts. Look at these positions in a solid twelve week stay inside the Top 10.

6 – 6 – 6 – 4 – 3 – 1 – 1 – 2 – 2 – 3 – 3 – 10

In short, it was a monster shifting 1.8 million copies in the UK alone, being our fifth best selling single of the year and also going to No 2 in the US Billboard Hot 100. So what was it about it the track that got under people’s skin so? Well, it was damned catchy with a singalong chorus that anyone could do but especially if your surname began with ‘Mc’ or ‘Mac’. Plus, it was a very smooth sound, almost effortlessly so. Much of that came from its sampling of “Genius Of Love” by Tom Tom Club which also featured heavily in Mariah Carey’s hit “Fantasy” from a few months earlier so maybe that triggered some brain muscle memory that appealed?

As for Morrison himself, he was not a pleasant individual and would never win any Citizen of the Year awards. I knew he’d been in trouble with the police but it wasn’t until I read up on him for this post that I understood the full extent of his law breaking. Perhaps the most famous incident was when he was sentenced to 12 months in Wormwood Scrubs for paying a lookalike to do 108 of his 150 hours of community service following his conviction for affray in a brawl in which there was one fatality. In an act of premonition, Morrison foretells his fate by wearing a set of handcuffs on his left hand in this performance.

Continuing the police presence in this show, here’s Gabrielle who wasn’t in trouble with the law herself at this time but she did have to help them with their enquiries. This was a case involving her ex-partner and father of her child who murdered his stepfather. Obviously, once the press got hold of the story and made the connection with Gabrielle, it was her name that hit the headlines not his but there was never any suggestion of the singer being involved in the murder. It wasn’t the greatest profile with which to relaunch her career though. However, “Give Me A Little More Time” was too appealing a song for any bad press to derail it and it became a Top 5 hit.

I should say, by the way, that tonight’s hosts (plural) are MN8 who are making the most of their brief time in the spotlight. I can’t say I approve of their banter so far especially the feeble joke about a band trying to be like Oasis called, The Ants…The Spiders…no The Beatles. Come on guys, that’s awful! Anyway, “Real Love” was the second single to come out of The Anthology project following the massively disappointing “Free As A Bird”. Based around another unfinished John Lennon demo, at least this one doesn’t sound like an ELO B-side despite the involvement once again of Jeff Lynne in a producer role. The video is the predictable montage of archive clips of the band integrated with some new footage of Paul, George and Ringo recording their contributions to that original demo. It doesn’t seem to have such a defined narrative as the promo for “Free As A Bird” which was meant to be from the perspective of a bird in flight. It also doesn’t have that grainy animation effect which its predecessor did but, personally, I think it’s all the better for that.

I don’t recall this but apparently Radio 1 refused to play “Real Love” on the basis that they were a contemporary music station and the latest release from The Beatles wasn’t what their listeners wanted to hear. Oh dear. Whilst falling short of calling it a ban, Radio 1’s stance caused a reaction from Paul McCartney (the return of the Mc?) who wrote an 800 word article in the Daily Mirror expressing his disappointment and that he could hear the influence of The Beatles in a lot of the then contemporary music. He had a point when it came to Oasis at least. In an act of contrition, station controller Matthew Bannister agreed for a ‘Golden Hour’ of Beatles music and that of those artists influenced by them to be broadcast.

The sixth take of the “Real Love” demo is the first track on the soundtrack to the 1988 documentary Imagine: John Lennon which I owned at one point. The official 1996 release of it would be the last new Beatles song released in the lifetime of George Harrison who died in 2001. In 2023, the final ever Beatles single “Now And Then” was released but thankfully I won’t have to review that.

OK, I quite liked the MN8 intro for this next one. One of them says “There’s Motörhead, Radiohead, Beavis and Butthead now there’s Technohead” while his pal keeps interrupting him saying he wants to be a hippy. “Go away and be a hippy then” the first one exclaims in exasperation finally. Look, it’s hardly Derek and Clive or Morecambe and Wise but it amused my tiny brain OK?! Talking of which, the brainless “I Wanna Be A Hippy” was purely for the feeble minded. The TOTP producers couldn’t get enough of it though it seems. Despite having fallen down the charts twice (and gone back up once), staying at No 9 (after peaking at No 6) for two weeks was considered enough chart traction for another (a third?) TOTP appearance. It would hang around the Top 40 for a further five weeks before departing by which point their follow up single was out and straight into the Top 20. Oh joy!

Wait…what?! Peter Andre had a hit in this country before “Mysterious Girl”?! I wouldn’t have believed it but here’s the evidence literally in front of my eyes. “Only One” was already at its peak of No 16. The aforementioned “Mysterious Girl” would be his subsequent single release and it would be that song that really broke him when it went to No 2. He followed that up with two consecutive No 1s before 1996 was over meaning he had four hits in that calendar year. Who would have thought that 28 years later, this perma-tanned, baby oiled berk would still be appearing on our TV screens long after his pop career was over?! What is his enduring appeal? I just don’t get it.

If I had to say something about “Only One” it would be that it’s not as bad as “Mysterious Girl” but that’s like saying Rishi Sunak isn’t as bad as Liz Truss. Both are horribly useless but one couldn’t outlast a wilting lettuce. Sadly Peter Andre’s career could.

Next up is Robert Miles who is up to No 2 with “Children”. In my mind, for no discernible reasons other than they’re both instrumentals and they were both in the charts at the same time, this record is always linked to the theme tune to The X Files by Mark Snow which we’ll see on the show in a couple of episodes time. As for this show, if you look closely in the Top 10 rundown, you can see there’s some editing gone on. The graphics for Robert Miles does not include the title of the song. Here’s @TOTPFacts with the reason why:

Whether this was the right decision or not, it was kind of undermined by what’s reported in the second half of the tweet above.

By 1996, and this might well upset some people, is it fair to say, in terms of the charts, that Gary Numan was becoming a one trick pony? Hear me out. He’s here on the show to perform his only* solo No 1 hit “Cars” – retitled as “Cars (Premier Mix)” – due to its use in an ad campaign for Carling Premier beer.

*”Are Friends Electric?” was released under the Tubeway Army banner

The last time he was in the TOTP studio? 1987. And what song was he performing then? Yes, another remix of “Cars” (this time restyled as the ‘E’ reg model mix). In total, the song has been released four times as a single if you count the original 1979 issue and a further rerelease in 1993 when it peaked at No 53. The 1996 version would get to No 17 and would be backed by a Best Of compilation called “The Premier Hits”. Money for old rope? Almost certainly.

Now, that’s not to say that Numan wasn’t busy recording in all the intervening years. He was – he’s released 22 studio albums and 51 singles so far in his career but would you have noticed unless you were a die hard fan? Ah yes, those fans, the so-called ‘Numanoids’. I’ve said before that I never enjoyed a good relationship with that particular fan base. Why? Because they were a massive pain in the arse when I worked in record shops that’s why! Endlessly ringing up to ask about release dates for their hero and then disputing the information I gave them. Always just a synth riff away from starting an argument. I’ve never been that keen on Numan himself either – all that endorsing of Margaret Thatcher (which he has publicly regretted since) and then marrying a member of his fan club. Then there’s his industrial rock sound that has dominated his later work. Not for me thanks though I can appreciate his pioneering part in the synth pop movement and his influence on subsequent artists. I’ve not got a totally closed outlook you know. I’m pretty open-minded and in touch with my caring side. You could say I’m a new man (ahem).

We arrive at one of the more notorious TOTP appearances, not because of the quality of the performance nor what the band were wearing but because of a much more…well, legal matter. As announced by hosts MN8, for the first time on the show was a totally unsigned act. Yes, it’s time for the curious footnote of pop music history that was/is Bis. Having formed at school in Woodfarm, East Renfrewshire this trio found themselves on the UK’s premier music show on prime time TV despite being unknown to the vast majority of the watching millions. How did this happen? It seems to be down to just one man who was a fan. Handily for Bis, that man was TOTP Executive Producer Ric Blaxill. What are the chances?! Now, as for that “unsigned” claim, it turns out that unknown doesn’t mean unsigned as they were actually on the indie label Chemikal Underground which was started by Scottish band The Delgados to release their first single. Other artists on the label’s roster included Arab Strap and Mogwai though their only UK Top 40 single came courtesy of Bis. The song performed here – “Kandy Pop” – was taken from their “The Secret Vampire Soundtrack” EP and would make No 25 in the charts.

Listening back to it now, I do wonder what all the fuss was about as it’s the sound of some over excited teenagers let loose in a recording studio and thinking that they’re the future of pop music. All very underwhelming. Maybe I felt different about it at the time – I can’t recall. Amazingly, this wasn’t their only UK Top 40 hit as in November 1998, “Eurodisco” went to No 38 (they were on the Wiiija label by this point). Bis split in 2003 but reconvened in 2009 and are still a going concern today and have toured with the likes of Foo Fighters, Garbage and…wait…Gary Numan?! That must surely have come about after they both appeared on this TOTP?! Maybe they got along well in the Green Room post show?

Take That remain at No 1 with their (sort of) valedictory single “How Deep Is Your Love”. In the last post, I said that I hadn’t realised how many units they’d shifted of their albums, seeing them as purely a singles band (in their first incarnation). However, their (first) Greatest Hits album released at this time would easily outsell two of those three studio albums with only “Everything Changes” marginally out performing it. Maybe they were a singles artist after all?

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Mark MorrisonReturn Of The MackNegative
2GabrielleGive Me A Little More TimeNah
3The Beatles Real LoveNo but I had a version of the demo on that Imagine: John Lennon soundtrack
4TechnoheadI Wanna Be A HippyNever
5Peter AndreOnly OneAs if
6Robert MilesChildrenI did not
7Gary NumanCars (Premier Mix)No
8BisKandy PopNope
9Take That How Deep Is Your LoveNo but my wife had their Greatest Hits CD

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001zyvf/top-of-the-pops-14031996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 07 MAR 1996

After Justine Frischmann the other week, now we get the other of the two biggest female names of the Britpop movement in the TOTP ‘golden mic’ slot. Louise Werner was/is, of course, the lead singer of Sleeper and as such the connection to and similarities with her Elastica counterpart were always going to be highlighted by a lazy music press. In March 1996, Sleeper were just about to reach the peak of their popularity with the release of sophomore album “The It Girl” just two months away. Said album would go platinum in the UK and harbour four hit singles. I caught Sleeper around this time at the Manchester Academy and they were pretty good as I remember. I always preferred Louise to Justine as she seemed the less intimidating of the two and, if I’m brutally honest, I fancied her more. There, I said it. Neither though seemed particularly at ease with the role of TOTP host and both came across as a bit awkward. Well, you can’t be good at everything I suppose (says the man who isn’t good at anything). As well as being singers in successful bands, both Justine and Louise had subsequent creative careers as an artist and author respectively.

Anyway, ready or not, it’s time for the music and we begin with a song called…erm…”Ready Or Not” by The Lightning Seeds. This was the lead single from their fourth album “Dizzy Heights” and was very much in the same vein as pretty much everything else they’d ever done – a jaunty, catchy, uplifting pop tune high on hooks but low on substance. Don’t get me wrong, I’m quite partial to the odd Lightning Seeds tune but even Ian Broudie would surely admit that his band were hardly Radiohead. This one though is perhaps a bit more lightweight than usual with lots of “La la la la’s” thrown into the mix including the whole of the outro. That’s maybe appropriate though given that the band’s drummer Chris Sharrock once played with The La’s as well as The Icicle Works and later Robbie Williams, Beady Eye and Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds.

The song would share its title with a No 1 hit by The Fugees from later in the year but that’s not the only link between the two. As Euro 96 fever took hold of the country and “Three Lions” topped the charts, it traded places at No 1 that Summer with The Fugees’ cover of “Killing Me Softly” with both songs reaching the top of the charts on two separate occasions. Oh yes…”Three Lions”. I’m afraid it’s coming soon to these TOTP repeats. Oh, and the lyric in “Ready Or Not” that goes “It’s like the tipper most topper most high”? It was surely inspired by this John Lennon line:

Who are these people and what on earth are they doing? Well, the artist was Sasha & Maria but they’re not the two berks making tits of themselves messing around with what looks like a bedsheet. I think this tweet sums up my thoughts on the matter:

Sasha was the Welsh DJ and record producer of Sasha and John Digweed fame whilst Maria was Maria Nayler who was a member of Ultraviolet in the early 90s and who would go on to guest on the Robert Miles hit “One And One” later in 1996. Here though, she was supplying the vocals for this, the similarly titled “Be As One”. Apparently, the track had been flooded into record shops via unlicensed white labels which led to Deconstruction Records contacting the BPI anti-piracy unit and taking out full page ads in the trade press to warn people off the illegal copies. Obviously, the track did/does nothing for me and watching it now it’s giving off strong Eurovision vibes but was clearly big in the clubs and made No 17 on the UK singles chart.

Louise Werner tries to loosen up a bit with an amusing reference in her next intro about Sleeper producer Stephen Street being called Jon Bum Bogey on account of his once big hair. OK, amusing might be pushing it but at least she’s trying. I’ve said it before but Bon Jovi were on a commercial role in this country in the mid 90s. Between 1993 and 1996 they racked up thirteen Top 40 hits including nine Top 10 entries. “These Days” was the penultimate of these and the title track of their 1995 album. A long way from the bluster of their poodle rock era, this was definitely showcasing their melancholy side – more “Save A Prayer” than “Livin’ On A Prayer” you might say. After one more hit, the band would take a pre-agreed four year hiatus before returning in 2000 with the “Crush” album. Whilst still a big name, I wonder though if the youth will know Jon as the father-in-law of Millie Bobby Brown rather than being the singer of one of the most successful rock bands of all time?

Next, we have one of those pointless hits. I don’t mean ‘pointless’ as in “what was the point of releasing that?” but rather Pointless as in the TV show. Asked to name an obscure Eternal single, an answer of “Good Thing” would definitely impress Alexander Armstrong. The third single from second album “Power Of A Woman”, it maybe wasn’t what we’d come to expect from the group. This was more of an – dare I use the word? – urban style rather than the slick, R&B/pop hybrid they’d been so successful with. Was it conceivable that the members of All Saints were set at home watching this performance and thought “Aye aye, we could do that but in cargo pants and crop tops”?

An interesting side plot to this hit is that the following week, ex-member Louise would release her second solo single “In Walked Love” which would peak at No 17 whereas “Good Thing” got to No 8. Chalk one up to Eternal but who was the ultimate winner in this battle do you reckon?

I’m getting really bogged down in all these dance tunes that have been on the show of late. Here’s another one. Gat Decor were, according to Wikipedia, one of the earliest exponents of ‘progressive house’ music. I’ve neither the time nor inclination to investigate what that particular strand of dance music was all about but having watched this performance of “Passion”, my uneducated view is that it’s yet another tune that resembles “Show Me Love” by Robin S. As for the track’s personal history, as Louise Werner says, it was originally a minor hit in 1992 as an instrumental but it was mashed up with “Do You Want It Right Now “ by Degrees Of Motion by an East London DJ who put out some DJ only copies of it turning it into an underground club sensation. Properly licensed and with vocals sung by Beverley Skeete, this 1996 version would peak at No 6.

After the bedsheet debacle of Sasha & Maria earlier, the now ubiquitous staging distraction for this dance hit was a guy behind Beverley giving off some strong Live And Let Die vibes.

Our host really tries to liven things up in her next intro which would no doubt be seen as inappropriate at the very least and possibly as racist now. Teeing up Boyzone who are live by satellite link from Korea, Louise says “I hope they’re not eating puppies or anything”. Gulp! Well, the lads definitely aren’t doing that as they’re too busy performing an especially lame song called “Coming Home Now”. This was their only single to be written solely by the five of them without any input from outside co-writers and it shows. There’s nothing really to this wisp of pop fluff that drifts aimlessly along to destination nowhere. It would be their only hit not to make the UK Top 3 in the first part of their career before their initial split in 2000. Interesting to note that Shane Lynch and Keith Duffy are only allowed to do the short, spoken word parts rather than a spotlight vocal like Ronan Keating and Stephen Gately get to do. As for poor old Mikey Graham, he’s not allowed to do anything except be in the background which was pretty much his only contribution to Boyzone ever. Talking of splits, they must have been thinking “we’re in here” when the news of Take That’s forthcoming break up hit the headlines. Indeed they were as their next two singles of 1996 would both go to No 1. The King is dead, long live The King!

The Women of Britpop theme continues now with Louise Werner introducing Camden drinking buddies Lush who are in the studio to perform their single “Ladykillers”. Probably the band’s most well known song, it was deliberately written by lead singer Miki Berenyi to be a hit with her admitting it was her attempt to give the press what they wanted, an affirmation of the band’s Britpop credentials. This may explain why it sounds like “Waking Up” by Elastica which itself lent heavily from “No More Heroes” by The Stranglers. The song has been taken up as a feminist statement due to its lyrics that lampoon the sexual bravado of men towards women. A few months later the Spice Girls would take up the baton and go global with their ‘Girl Power’ slogan. I suspect that Lush would have preferred another drink down the Good Mixer, Camden Town than all that world domination business though.

It’s Britpop overload as the next act on are Supergrass with their “Going Out” hit. When they performed this as an ‘exclusive’ the other week, did they have the brass trio with them? I’m sure I would have remembered three guys who looked like Tom Petty, Bill Bailey and Mike Barson from Madness (it isn’t him is it?). I saw Supergrass live in York in the early 2000s and they refused to play “Alright”. That’s the last time I spend an evening ‘going out’ with them.

Take That have predictably gone straight in at No 1 with their ‘final’ single “How Deep Is Your Love”. Their run of success was quite remarkable with eight of their last nine singles topping the chart. In my head, they absolutely were a singles band with their albums not as successful but a quick check of their discography shows that the three albums of the first part of their career all sold well with the biggest being “Everything Changes” which shifted 1.3 million copies in the UK alone. I think it was the fact that they’d released more videos than albums (six to three) by this point that made me undervalue them. A few years later I was living in York and hosted a pub quiz as the regular guy was on holiday. I included a question about Take That and made the mistake of making a derisive comment about them (this was before their wildly successful comeback in 2006) and was perhaps rightfully rounded on by the assembled throng of quizzers. Take that indeed!

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1The Lightning SeedsReady Or NotNot
2Sasha & MariaBe As OneNo chance
3Bon JoviThese DaysNah
4Eternal Good ThingNo
5Gat DecorPassionAs if
6BoyzoneComing Home NowNever
7Lush LadykillersNope
8SupergrassGoing OutI did not
9Take ThatHow Deep Is Your LoveNo but my wife had their Greatest Hits CD

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001zqtv/top-of-the-pops-07031996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 29 FEB 1996

1996 must have been a leap year as we’ve got a TOTP on the 29th February. The day after this show aired, Status Quo took Radio 1 to the High Court over its refusal to playlist the band’s latest single, a cover of “Fun Fun Fun” by The Beach Boys who also feature on the record. Status Quo lost their legal action with the BBC successfully claiming that the group did not fit the demographic audience the station was trying to reach. In a musical landscape dominated by Britpop and dance music, they had a point. Or did they? The album the single came from – “Don’t Stop” – went to No 2 and sold 100,000 copies so wasn’t it Radio 1’s obligation to reflect what was popular? For what it’s worth, I think they made the right decision. The album was entirely made up of cover versions including (and I’ve only just discovered this) their takes on “Safety Dance” by Men Without Hats and “The Future’s So Bright (I Gotta Wear Shades)” by Timbuk 3. I know! What on earth?! I’m almost curious enough to investigate what they sound like but not quite.

The following day, Melody Maker praised Pulp’s Jarvis Cocker for his protest at the BRIT awards two weeks earlier against Michael Jackson’s performance of “Earth Song” suggesting he should be knighted. Although Jarvis got arrested for his part in the incident (with Bob Mortimer famously attending the police station to represent him legally), I think we all know who ultimately came off better out of the episode. Pulp were probably as famous as they ever would be at that point with the controversy taking Jarvis to the front pages of the daily newspapers rather than just the music press. It hadn’t always been like that of course with the band having spent the 80s on the peripheries of indiedom before the move to Island Records and becoming bona fide chart stars. And how did they do that? Via “Perseverance” of course which incidentally is the name of the first song on the show tonight.

Yes, Terrorvision have blasted their way into the Top 5 with this, the lead single from third album “Regular Urban Survivors”, and it’s a stonking tune. Breaking the conventions of standard rock with brass parts and a vocal from Tony Wright that’s ragged and raw sounding but by no means without melody and hooks aplenty, it’s a great way to start the show and marks a welcome departure from all those dance acts and their repetitive beats. A regular reader of this blog assures me that Tony has a very nice cafe in Otley and he can often be seen behind the counter serving cups of tea and slices of Victoria sponge to the local residents or perhaps those rock fans who have gone on a pilgrimage to find one of their 90s heroes. Tony has framed pictures of his lyrics on the wall if you want to get a selfie with some rock memorabilia. Maybe he even has one that includes the infamous line in “Perseverance” about the ‘whales and dolphins’?

Ah! Here’s the dance act with repetitive beats. I knew it would only be a matter of time. Gusto were nothing to do with Chelsea right back Malo but was instead New Jersey producer Edward Greene whose hit “Disco’s Revenge” was built around a loop of a sample of a track called “Groovin’ You” by former Herbie Hancock drummer Harvey Mason. The title “Disco’s Revenge” was taken from a quote by legendary ‘Godfather of House Music’ Frankie Knuckles who described the style of music developed in his club in Detroit thus. If you’re familiar with this blog, you’ll know that, by writing the above, I’ve wandered into an area where I’ve no right in being, namely house music. I’m clearly out of my depth when discussing such matters so I’ll extricate myself quickly.

As for “Disco’s Revenge”, I’d rather have “Rocker’s Revenge and their 1982 smash hit “Walking On Sunshine”.

Whether you like her or not, the dominance of the charts by Celine Dion was in full swing by the mid 90s. With one huge No 1 to her name already in the form of “Think Twice”, she would then settle into a pattern of churning out the hits on a regular basis before exploding again with that song from the Titanic movie in 1997. Within the calendar year of 1996, she would rack up four Top 10 UK hits. No artist would have more than that. So popular was she that one Christmas around this time, the police had to be called to an Our Price store in the region (thankfully not the one where I worked) to settle a dispute between two customers who were locked in battle (literally) over the last Celine Dion CD in the shop with both refusing to let go of it! “Falling Into You” was the title track from Celine’s fourteenth studio album and saw some rather restrained vocals for once from the ‘Queen of Power Ballads’. If only those two shoppers had showed the same restraint.

Next the return of Gabrielle whom we haven’t seen on the show or in the charts for a whole two years. The curse of having your debut single go to No 1 (the only way from there is down) had afflicted Gabrielle since “Dreams” had topped the charts in 1993. Her three subsequent single releases had peaked at Nos 9, 26 and 24. However, she would spectacularly lift that hoodoo with “Give Me A Little More Time”. Just a ‘Just’ away from sharing the same title as the old Chairman Of The Board hit from the 70s (and also for Kylie in the 90s) and ‘a little’ too much to be the name of Whitesnake’s 1984 minor hit, Gabrielle’s song was actually a classy slice of soul/pop with a retro 60s feel. Perfect for daytime radio playlists, it reversed her trend of diminishing chart returns and then some by peaking at No 5.

While she’s been away, Gabrielle has had a change of image with a new hairstyle that also acts as a replacement for her trademark eye patch. She has ptosis, a condition which causes the drooping of one eyelid and has always covered it using hats, sunglasses, her hair and, of course, the eye patch. Did she ever wear it again after this point? If this wasn’t a watershed moment for the eye patch, it definitely was for Gabrielle’s career as this hit would usher in a period of sustained success. Two more mid-sized hits followed “Give Me A Little More Time” before a No 2 turned up after she joined forces with East 17 on “If You Ever”. Two more Top Tenners followed in its wake before “Rise” gave her a second No 1 some seven years after her first. She still wasn’t done as “Out Of Reach” went to No 4 on the back of its inclusion on the soundtrack to Bridget Jones’s Diary.

Next a run of three huge music legends on the bounce starting with Sting who’s beaming in to the show from that well used TOTP satellite location under Brooklyn Bridge, New York. How many times was this setting featured?! I get that the backdrop is an arresting image of the Manhattan skyline but it kind of dwarfs the artist and makes them seem incongruous. Sting’s appearance here isn’t helped by the fact that he’s doing a dance version of “Let Your Soul Be Your Pilot”. Why?! As it’s a designated dance version, there has to be a troop of backing dancers cavorting behind him but this just adds to the feeling of absurdity. Sadly I can’t find a clip of this performance on YouTube. Maybe that’s for the best.

Meanwhile, back in the studio is Tina Turner with the lead single from her latest album “Wildest Dreams”. Remarkably, this was her first studio album for seven years though it didn’t feel like Tina had been away at all thanks to a Best Of collection in 1991, her biopic film What’s Love Got To Do With It and accompanying soundtrack in 1993 and her recording of the theme tune for the James Bond flick Goldeneye in 1995. Listening to “Whatever You Want”, it sounds like it could also have been recorded for a 007 film with some heavy “Licence To Kill” vibes permeating through. Tina does her usual Tina shtick here but as with Sting before her, the backing dancers seem unnecessary. No doubt Tina and record label Parlophone would have been wanting (and perhaps expecting) a bigger hit with the track than the No 23 high it produced but I fear she may have been ever so slightly out of sync with UK chart tastes at the time.

We’d only just bid farewell to Babylon Zoo’s “Spaceman” at the top of the charts but now we were literally saying “Hallo Spaceboy” to David Bowie and the Pet Shop Boys. It seems to be generally accepted that Bowie was not at his best in the 80s. Despite the success of “Let’s Dance” (both the album and the single), pretty much all of his output that decade did not meet with the approval of the fans. However, and I’m not counting myself as a Bowie superfan but I did see him live once, I struggled with his 90s material. “Black Tie White Noise” passed me by with its lack of obvious singles, “Earthling” was never going to win me over with its exploration into the drum and bass phenomenon and then there was “Outside”. Influenced by Twin Peaks, this was a concept album that followed a narrative of a detective investigating the murder of a 14 year old girl in a fictional New Jersey town. Reviews were mixed with some labelling it as his finest work since “Scary Monsters (And Super Creeps)” whilst others derided it as pretentious shit. I was probably somewhere in the middle of those two extremes of opinion but even I was definite that “Hallo Spaceboy” was a good single. How much of that is down to the involvement of the Pet Shop Boys more than Bowie I’m not sure but their influence couldn’t be denied. An almost hi-NRG backing allied to Bowie’s unique phrasing and Neil Tennant’s deadpan vocals, the decision to reference “Space Oddity” and Major Tom in the lyrics was perhaps cynical but also a clincher.

Despite looking like a vicar with a stiletto fetish, Bowie is still effortlessly cool in this performance with Neil and Chris happy to literally stand to one side to let the people see the master at work. “Hallo Spaceboy” peaked at No 12 making it Bowie’s second highest charting single as a solo artist of the whole of the 90s.

On February 13th 1996, Take That announced that they were splitting up. It’s hard to recall nearly 30 years on how much of a big deal this was especially as ten years later they came back and have stayed back for a further 18 years and counting but a big deal it was. Infamously, telephone helplines were set up by the government to support those teenage fans that were left distraught and with feelings so big that they didn’t know what to do with them. They had been together for six years or so but only three and a half of those were as chart stars. Was that a long time for a teen-oriented pop group to be around or had they called time on themselves too early? I’m pretty sure that they could have carried on for another album and a few hit singles but by that point they would have been pushing 30 which may have been at the older end of the pop star age bracket. By disappearing for 10 years, they probably gave people the chance to miss them before picking up where they left off and giving themselves a second career. Did they feel the pressure of the presence of Boyzone in the charts as a rival to their popularity? I think they possibly could have ridden that out. After the departure of Robbie Williams the year before, maybe the writing had been on the wall although there still seemed to be an appetite for the group.

To draw a line under what would turn out to be the first part of their career, a Greatest Hits album was released with a new single to promote it which was a cover of the Bee Gees 1977 hit “How Deep Is Your Love”. Was it a lazy move to bow out with a cover? Well, there was a certain amount of symmetry to the release as their breakthrough hit in 1992 had been a cover – “It Only Takes A Minute” by Tavares. The That lads give a decent take on the track with Gary Barlow’s lead vocal a passable Gibb brother impression. Whilst he and Jason Orange have sensible, mid 90s haircuts, Howard Donald has what can only be described as dread bunches whilst Mark Owen has a hairstyle I might have had in junior school! After this single, the talk turned to solo careers with Gary Barlow everyone’s favourite to be the most successful. Little did we know. One person who did seem to be in the know was host Nicky Campbell who correctly predicted a “reunion tour in the next century” in his outro.

Oasis are straight in at No 1 with “Don’t Look Back In Anger”. Of course they are. What’s maybe surprising is that despite all the fuss around the band and Britpop, this was only their second chart topper at the time after “Some Might Say” the year before. Of course they’d had some near misses. I was convinced they would be the Christmas No 1 in 1994 with “Whatever” but they lost out to East 17. Then there was the Battle of Britpop when they were beaten into second place by Blur and of course, their last single “Wonderwall” had sold and sold and sold but not at the right time to displace Michael Jackson’s “Earth Song”. This time, however, there was no stopping them even though it would only be for one week due to the hysteria surrounding Take That’s swansong.

Is there a more Britpop moment than Noel Gallagher and his Union Jack Epiphone Supernova guitar in this performance? What’s that? The Select magazine cover from April 1993 with Suede’s Brett Anderson set against a Union Jack backdrop? Or Liam Gallagher and Patsy Kensit on the cover of Vanity Fair in a bed with Union Jack pillow cases and bedspread? Nah, it’s Liam and that guitar for me. Perhaps an even bigger moment associated with this song in my opinion though is its use in the wonderful BBC drama Our Friends In The North. The final episode of the decades spanning show aired eleven days after this TOTP was broadcast. The final scene showed the character Geordie played by Daniel Craig striding across the Tyne Bridge (and out of our lives it felt like) after an emotional reunion with the show’s other three main protagonists. It was quite a moment for the watching millions at home. When “Don’t Look Back In Anger” came on to soundtrack this scene, it felt almost perfect. Timing wise, with the last episode being set in 1995 and the song at the top of the charts, it felt like the zeitgeist hadn’t been followed so much as tracked and hunted down. It really was sublime stuff.

Oasis themselves wouldn’t release anything after “Don’t Look Back In Anger” for nigh on 18 months as they retreated to record the difficult third album “Be Here Now” by which point Britpop was on its way out making this TOTP performance an even more defining moment in time. As Martin Tyler said of Liam and Noel’s beloved Man City winning the Premier League so dramatically in 2012, “I swear you’ll never see anything like this ever again so watch it, drink it in…”.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1TerrorvisionPerseveranceGood tune but no
2GustoDisco’s RevengeAs if
3Celine DionFalling Into YouNever
4GabrielleGive Me A Little More TimeNo
5StingLet Your Soul Be Your PilotNah
6Tina TurnerWhatever You WantNope
7David Bowie featuring Pet Shop BoysHallo SpaceboyNo but I did like it
8Take ThatHow Deep Is Your LoveNo but my wife had that Best Of album
9Oasis Don’t Look Back In AngerYES!

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001zqts/top-of-the-pops-29021996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 22 FEB 1996

Welcome to another instalment of TOTP Rewind, the blog where I, a man who turned 56 yesterday, reviews past episodes of the legendary pop music show and who, despite having lived through this era and worked in record shops for nigh on the whole of the 90s, often has zero recall of some of the acts and songs featured. Don’t let that put you off though! I remember some of it – honest! To help stimulate my brain into activity, and I haven’t done this in a while, I’m going to check in on what I was up to in early 1996 in my personal life (I will get to the music eventually I promise!). Well, I was working at the Our Price store in Stockport and had been there for about a year following the closure of the Market Street, Manchester shop. Retail was hard work but the product was exciting and the staff all pretty much got on with each other (usually) so there were regular after work drinks in the town’s hostelries.

My life was ticking along nicely then until it was rudely interrupted by me being called up for jury service. If you’ve never done it, I can say that it was both fascinating and terrifying. I don’t know if it’s still the same as I’ve not done it since but you were expected to serve for a minimum of two weeks with the courts meeting the costs of your wages. Two weeks off work might have sounded great and indeed day one was spent just sitting around waiting to be called onto a jury which I wasn’t. I remember I was reading Trainspotting by Irvine Walsh and pretty much finished the whole book that day. First thing on day two though I was selected for a jury. Watching the defence and prosecution making their cases in court was fascinating. It wasn’t until they’d finished and you had to go and discuss the case as a jury that it became real and that was the scary bit. That 17th century saying describing the make up of a jury as “twelve good men and true” was a load of bollocks I was to discover and I don’t mean the obvious flaw that women have been serving on juries since the 1920s. I vowed there and then never to get in trouble with the law because if my misdemeanour went to court, the calibre of people deciding your fate could not be guaranteed. I won’t go into any details of the case but one bloke came to his personal verdict straight away based on what the accused looked like, refused to consider any counter arguments and sat there reading his copy of The Sun for the rest of the day. As we couldn’t come to a verdict we were all agreed on by the end of play, we started to wonder what would happen. Would we have to stay overnight in a hotel like in the movies? Fearing this might be the case, The Sun reading bloke started to panic saying he was meant to be going out with the lads that night and so offered to change his mind if it would help! I was appalled! In the end, we were just told to go home and not talk about the case.

When we reconvened the following day, The Sun reader assumed his original stance and we were subsequently dismissed as a jury as we were taking to too long to come to a verdict for this type of case (an historical one brought years after the event with no physical evidence). The experience has stayed with me ever since. Back to the TOTP though and I wonder if there are any acts on tonight who should be tried for crimes against popular music?

Well, “I Wanna Be A Hippy” by Technohead must surely have some charges to face. As established in a previous post, this was an example of gabber dance music, a subgenre of hardcore techno and definitely not happy hardcore as I initially surmised. What it undoubtedly was, of course, was hideously irritating crap that, horror of horrors, also refused to shift from your brain for hours once heard.

I can think of no more of a condemnation of it than to point out that its chart peak of No 6 was actually bettered by a parody of it by The Smurfs later in the year retitled as “I’ve Got A Little Puppy” which got to No 4 despite featuring the lyric “I take it for a walk, pooper pooper scooper”. Talk about dog shit!

I seem to be getting very bogged down in definitions of dance music currently and here’s another one. After the gabber strand of Technohead comes the Dream house of Robert Miles. At least host Lisa I’Anson had the good grace to name check the sub genre in her intro meaning I didn’t have to do too much research into working out which category it belonged to. “Children” was another of those mid-90s hits like “Missing” by Everything But The Girl that stayed on the UK charts for months. Ten weeks inside the Top 10 (of which the first seven were spent at either No 2 or No 3) and sixteen in the Top 40 in total. Quite remarkable for a tune that initially was not included on Radio 1 daytime playlists. No matter though as the UK, just like the rest of Europe where it went to No 1 in twelve different countries, was unable to resist its charms. Characterised by a floating, ethereal piano riff, was it just Jean Michel Jarre for the 90s? I don’t know enough about the “Oxygène and “Équinoxe” hitmaker to make an informed judgment but it was certainly worlds away from the headache inducing relentless beats of the likes of the aforementioned Technohead and thank god for that!

Apparently, Miles created “Children” to help combat a tragic consequence of rave culture, namely that of clubbers falling asleep at the wheel of their vehicles after a night of strenuous dancing combined with alcohol and drug use. Dubbed ‘strage del sabato sera’ (Saturday night slaughter) in Italy, Miles wanted to compose a a calming track to end a DJ set to help the crowd acclimatise before heading home. I had no idea about any of that until now. It was just that instrumental dance track that I sold over and over the counter in Our Price.

Here’s a question. How do you follow up the biggest hit of your career which knocked down barriers that had previously excluded you from a wider audience and brought you into the mainstream consciousness? Well, if you’re Björk, you turn your back on that breakthrough hit and return to your original style and principles and resume your rather experimental music career. Reading that back, it sounds rather glib and possibly inaccurate. Or is it actually correct? Let’s examine the evidence. The case for the prosecution is that surely anyone not previously familiar with Björk’s oeuvre but who loved and bought “It’s Oh So Quiet” were not going to be tempted to continue that purchasing trend by the next single “Hyperballad” were they? A skittering, jerky, bleeping track about throwing objects off a cliff in the early morning before your partner awakes to symbolise the parts of yourself you must sacrifice in order to make a relationship work, this was a return to the Björk of old wasn’t it?

The case for the defence is that the track was critically acclaimed by the music press. Look at these reviews:

…excellent example of music meeting art”

Diver, Mike (2009). “Review of Björk – Post”. BBC. Retrieved 25 November 2020.

“…a delightful track that all fans of quality music will enjoy.”

Baltin, Steve (9 March 1996). “Pop Singles”. Cash Box. p. 7. Retrieved 14 November 2022.

“All fans of quality music” eh? Well, that’s me told. Added to that is the fact that “Hyperballad” was a UK Top 10 hit and that Björk had just won a BRIT award for International Female Solo Artist would suggest she was hardly a cult figure any longer and that she had already crossed over into the mainstream quite successfully thank you very much. The verdict? The blogger is guilty of anti-Björk bias m’lud.

Next a duo who were continually accused of committing the crime of making bland and unworthy pop music – will the Lighthouse Family please rise! In their defence, their hit “Lifted” was co-written by Martin Brammer who was the vocalist in the rather excellent 80s band The Kane Gang who knew his way around a tune and indeed is an Ivor Novello Award nominee. The prosecution would level the charges that he’s also written songs for Olly Murs and Nick Carter of Backstreet Boys. My verdict would be that though not a fan, there are much more heinous musical misdemeanours to be offended by although the claim on Smooth Radio’s website that Lighthouse Family are “one of the most popular duos of all time” may result in litigation from Simon & Garfunkel, Soft Cell, Erasure, Pet Shop Boys…

From a duo to a trio now as it’s yet another appearance on the show for 3T and their hit “Anything”. I’m so bored of this lot and their drippy ballad that the only thing that will keep me watching is to see if the one in the hat has brought his backpack with him and whether he’ll dramatically throw it down on the floor again…

*keeps watching…*

He’s definitely got it with him…

*still watching…*

Pow! He’s slam dunked it again! Now cart them all off to jail. It is beyond reasonable doubt that they are guilty of assault and battery of my ears.

It’s time for the Battle of Britpop Version 2.0 that nobody ever talks about (apart from me) probably because it wasn’t really a proper thing. We all know that Blur won said battle in the summer of 1995 but there was nearly a repeat the following year. Perhaps deliberately, Oasis and Blur missed clashing release dates of their first singles of 1996 by a week meaning there was not officially a rematch of the two bands duking it out for the No 1 spot. This was probably just as well in the case of Damon and co as they would have been stopped in the first round by their northern counterparts. “Stereotypes” was the third single released from “The Great Escape” album and its chart high of No 7 was pretty respectable. However, when “Don’t Look Back In Anger” came out seven days later, its sales dwarfed those of “Stereotypes”. Well, they did in Our Price Stockport anyway. I’m pretty sure I have these figures correct – by my memory we sold 429 CDs of the Oasis single in week one but just 13 of Blur’s. Ooof! No wonder Noel Gallagher felt cocky enough to give this message to camera at the top of the show:

“Good evening Top of the Pops. Best band in the world, live and exclusive…and it’s not Blur”

To rub salt in the wound, the TOTP producers have got both bands in the studio together tonight and are letting Oasis perform two tracks after they’d already walked off with three BRIT awards (to Blur’s zero) three days earlier but to Blur’s credit, they seem to have taken it all in good grace with Damon acting all playful around Lisa I’Anson as she introduces them. As for “Stereotypes” as a song, it’s not the band’s best work by any measure. A functional, Blur-by-numbers track to my mind but supposedly it had originally been earmarked as the lead single from the album. Now if that Battle of Britpop had been “Stereotypes” v “Don’t Look Back In Anger” instead of “Country House” v “Roll With It”, we might have had a different winner.

And so to those naughty Manc lads who, as previously mentioned, have been allotted two songs on the show which was not a regular occurrence then or at any point in TOTP history. As far as I’m aware, only The Beatles and The Jam were given that honour previously. The Fab Four’s double appearance was way before my time but I distinctly remember The Jam performing double A-side “Town Called Malice” and “Precious” in 1982 as my Weller obsessed elder brother sat watching transfixed. Fast forward 14 years and it’s self confessed Jam fan Noel Gallagher taking up the baton from his hero. “Don’t Look Back In Anger” was the second of eight No 1s for Oasis and in truth, its success was no surprise. With the album “(What’s The Story) Morning Glory?” having already been out four months and gone multiple times platinum, you might have thought that a fourth single being lifted from it was destined to not pull up any trees sales wise as so many people already had it. However, such was the buzz around this huge anthem and so long had we known that it would be coming out as a single (it was initially due out in early January but was delayed by five weeks) that there was huge anticipation for its release.

I understand the criticisms that are levelled at it (and many other Oasis tracks) that it’s so derivative and steals from other songs. There’s the “Imagine”-esque piano opening, the lyric pinch from the legendary John Lennon memoirs cassette that was stolen from the Dakota Hotel, the similarity to “All The Young Dudes” and my own personal discovery that the chords are almost the same as those of “Ralph McTell’s “Streets Of London” and yet…I still think it’s a great song, possibly their best. I think there’s a valid claim here that this song and 1996 in general was the high point of the band’s career. Sure they wouldn’t release any new material for another 18 months but this was the year of the Maine Road gigs (more of them later) plus the two nights at Knebworth House where they performed to 250,000 people but could have sold 10 times the amount of tickets. I don’t think they were ever bigger than at this point. 1997 would bring the difficult third album “Be Here Now” and the whole cringey ‘Cool Britannia’ nonsense and subsequent years would see the band change the line up though remain popular but not be the phenomenon that they once were.

I certainly recall thinking this double TOTP performance was a big deal. The way Liam goes “yeah, yeah, yeah” to the studio audience as he crosses over with Noel as if to say “settle down, of course we’re playing another and we’re the only band who can do this because we’re the best”. That second song was their cover of Slade’s “Cum On Feel The Noize” which was one of the three extra tracks featured on the CD single. For some this was a lazy, hammy choice of song to cover but I loved it especially the piss taking Black Country accents the band put in at the beginning and end of the track. Well, I was 28 years younger then and I guess my sense of humour wasn’t as mature (?) as it is (?) now. The other tracks on that CD single were “Underneath The Sky” which didn’t have that much going for it in retrospect but which I thought was perfectly fine back then and “Step Out” which was a gloriously effervescent song that unfortunately gave more credence to the claims of those who were not Oasis fans that Noel just kept stealing other people’s work when it was found to be so similar to Stevie Wonder’s “Uptight (Everything’s Alright)” that the soul legend had to be credited on the track.

So returning to those aforementioned Maine Road gigs, I did get to the Saturday one but I nearly missed out altogether. I knew that they were going on sale from the Manchester Apollo box office and the Apollo wasn’t that far from where we were living. As it happened, the day they went on sale was one of those when I was on jury service. This was great news as it meant I didn’t have to worry about getting to work and also gave me a bit of extra time as the courts didn’t open until about 10ish. Nothing could stop me getting those Oasis tickets now…except the monstrously huge queue that I found when I arrived at the Apollo. I thought I was getting there in time for the box office to open but hadn’t banked on the number of people who had camped out overnight to be at the head of the queue. I joined the back of it and looked at my watch. The queue wasn’t moving quickly and all that time that I thought I had was now not looking like nearly enough. So couldn’t I have just stuck it out and tuned up late at court? Not an option. On a previous day I’d witnessed a fellow jury member return late from lunch by a few minutes delaying the start of the afternoon session. The judge asked him how much his lunch had cost. “Five pounds” came the reply. “Add a zero to that and that’s how much your fine is for being late back” pronounced the judge. As I got closer to the box office window, the minutes were slipping away. I got to within six or seven people from the front of the queue before time ran out and I lost my nerve. I just walked away from the queue and headed into town to do my public duty. Fortunately for me, my mate Paul (the chef from last week’s post who liked to play rap music loudly while washing his whites in our flat) was on the case and got tickets for us all so I did go to the Oasis ball after all.

The “Spaceman”’s orbit has started to decay and he’s crashing back down to earth. Yes, it’s the fifth and final week at No 1 for Babylon Zoo and what a strange ride it was. The nation lost its head over the music on a 30 seconds jeans advert causing the full track to be released. Only then did the truth come out that it wasn’t what the advert had promised but we gave a collective shrug of our shoulders and went out and bought it in our droves anyway. Jas Mann got to be the pop star who he always believed it was his destiny to be for a little while before suffering a backlash that this country always reserves for people deemed to have been too successful. We might see Babylon Zoo on TOTP again in these repeats as there were a couple of minor hit singles in the wake of their No 1 but their time in the spotlight was waning faster than a shooting star across the sky. Unlike “Starman”, “Spaceman” didn’t blow our minds, at least not for long anyway.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1TechnoheadI Wanna Be A HippyNever
2Robert MilesChildrenNo
3BjörkHyperballadI did not
4Lighthouse FamilyLiftedNah
53TAnythingNope
6BlurStereotypesNo but I had The Great Escape album with it on
7OasisDon’t Look Back In Anger / Cum On Feel The NoizeYes sir!
8Babylon ZooSpacemanI am going to admit to buying it but not for me for a friend who was obsessed with it so she could use my staff discount – honest!

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001zj0c/top-of-the-pops-22021996?seriesId=unsliced