TOTP 10 DEC 1992

When I was a lad (can’t believe I’ve started a post with that phrase!) things seemed straightforward, linear even. Timelines of events were uncomplicated. Things happened then finished. Then something else happened. What on earth am I talking about? Well, I’m thinking about musical movements.

When I was growing up in the 70s, it seemed to me that flavours of music would rise to popularity, burn brightly and then fizzle out whereupon something else would take over. So glam rock was prevalent from 1971 to 1975 approximately before punk rock pressed the reset button in a whirlwind of filth and fury. By 1978 with The Sex Pistols in disarray, punk had served its purpose and was superseded by New Wave and a Mod revival. When that bit the dust the New Romantics took centre stage with swagger and outrageous outfits. With the pin up boys of that movement aspiring to be more than cult status, New Pop was born with Duran Duran, Spandau Ballet and Culture Club dominating the charts. See what I mean? Yes, that’s a very simplistic view that could easily be debunked I’m sure (where was disco in all this for example?) but I’m going with it to enable my point. Talking of which, what is my point exactly? It’s this. By the time we got to late 1992, what musical movement were we in because I have no idea going by the running order on this edition of TOTP. Yes, obviously we had seen a dance explosion happen from at least 1988 onwards (some may even date it as early as 1986) but by this point it was the movement was so refracted that there was a kaleidoscope of sub genres. I remember whilst working for Our Price in the 90s a memo coming out from head office entitled ‘scary areas of your shop and how to deal with them’. First on the list was how to classify the dance collections section of the racks, so unwieldy had that section become.

Anyway, back to TOTP and this show featured a boy band, a Motown superstar, a part of the establishment that was into his fifth decade of hit records, the Queen of Latino pop, a posthumous release from one of the biggest and most flamboyant rock stars ever, some US R’n’B a cappella style, some indie rock, a collaboration between some Manc electronic dance pioneers and the kings of Brummie reggae and…descending from a parallel universe a troupe of wrestlers! Pick the bones out of that! What the Hell was going on?! Let’s find out..,

We start with that boy band – Take That. After having lived with the next big thing tag for a year or so without delivering on it, these lads had finally started turning potential and promotion into sales. Their cover of Barry Manilow’s “Could It Be Magic” was their fourth chart hit of the year and this one was the biggest of the lot, ascending ultimately to a high of No 3. Now Take That weren’t the first teen sensation to do a cover version – I’m thinking The Bay City Rollers doing “Bye Bye Baby” by The Four Seasons for example – but this did seem to set a template for the conveyor belt of acts that followed in their wake. Look at this lot:

  • 911 – “More Than A Woman” by the Bee Gees
  • A1 – “Take On Me” by A-ha
  • Boyzone – “Father And Son” by Cat Stevens
  • Five – “We Will Rock You” by Queen
  • Let Loose – “Make It With You” by Bread
  • OTT – “Let Me In” by The Osmonds
  • Upside Down – “If You Leave Me Now” by Chicago
  • Westlife – “Mandy” by Barry Manilow

All fine versions I’m sure you’ll agree! To be fair though, Take That’s cover of “Could It Be Magic” was pretty good I think although their reworking of it had more to do with Donna Summer’s 1976 disco rendition than the Manilow version. I seem to recall it being received pretty well as an unexpectedly strong version which wrong footed most people’s expectations of what they would do next. Sure it was a cover but of a different flavour to their take on “It Only Takes A Minute” by Tavares that gave them their first big chart hit. Should they have reversed their release schedule and put “Could It Be Magic” out earlier and then gone big time on ballad “A Million Love Songs” for the Xmas No 1? For what it’s worth I think they got it the right way round.

This was the first time that Robbie Williams took on the vocals on his own. Little did we know what was to come in just a few short years. Gary Barlow is demoted to rank and file status – he’s on backing dancer/ vocals duties with the rest of the group. You can almost see him counting the dance steps in his head. I’d watch your back Gary if I was you.

Despite having passed away in late 1991, Freddie Mercury still retained a massive presence into 1992. In April, The Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert was held at Wembley stadium and in November came “The Freddie Mercury Album”, a collection of his solo work released to commemorate the anniversary of his death. It was a nice idea for the fanbase and no doubt record label Parlophone always had it in mind to ring every drop of revenue they could out of his existing catalogue. What I didn’t quite get though was how they were going to put together a Best Of out of such scant source material. Freddie only released one, pure solo album in his lifetime which was 1985’s “Mr Bad Guy”. Yes, there was that “Barcelona” album with Montserrat Caballé but who, apart from superfans, really knows anything from that but the title track? What else is there? Well, he had a hit single in 1984 called “Love Kills” from Giorgio Moroder’s restoration of Fritz Lang’s 1927 classic silent film Metropolis. Then there’s his No 4 hit from 1987 which was his cover of The Platters oldie “The Great Pretender”. And…erm…oh yes! There’s “I was Born To Love You”, the only single to chart from that “Mr Bad Guy” album. Erm…except that isn’t on “The Freddie Mercury Album”! I presume it was a licensing issue as “Mr Bad Guy” was released by CBS rather than Queen’s EMI label. There are other tracks from it on “The Freddie Mercury Album” but maybe CBS/Sony didn’t want to give away the rights to its (then) best known tune.

Given all the above, Parlophone chose to promote the album with “In My Defence”. This was a track from the Dave Clark musical Time. This was the production that had already given us Top 40 singles by Cliff Richard (“She’s So Beautiful”), Julian Lennon (“Because”) and indeed Freddie himself who took “Time” to No 32 in 1986. I guess Parlophone could have rereleased “The Great Pretender” (which they ultimately did after “In My Defence”) but not “Barcelona” which had already been re-issued for the 1992 Olympics. “In My Defence” it was though and it’s a perfect vehicle for Freddie’s voice, all overblown drama and huge notes but it works pretty well. It could easily have been a Queen composition really. The single went Top 10 but there was an even bigger hit to come from the album the following year that had been hiding in plain sight but that’s for a future post…

Something from the US chart now as we see a song that would end up being a big hit in the UK four years down the line but not for the original artist. I don’t recall the Shai version of “If I Ever Fall In Love” but then, despite this TOTP appearance, it only made it to No 36 in our charts. In the US however, it was a huge hit staying at No 2 for eight weeks!

Was the version they perform here the version on the record? A cappella I mean?

*checks Spotify*

I found two versions. One is the TOTP version and the other has a bit of instrumentation on it but not much. I’m not mad on a cappella I have to say and Shai haven’t made me change my mind. What was the deal with the guy with his coat half on and half off?!

Oh that version that was a hit in 1996? That was by East 17 and Gabrielle of course. They changed the title to “If I Ever”, dropped the a cappella style and took it all the way to No 2. Don’t think it stayed there for eight weeks though. I didn’t like that version either.

Right it’s time for those wrestlers! Despite the charts having been infiltrated in recent weeks by novelty tripe like computer games tunes “Tetris” and “Supermarioland” and a ‘song’ by stripper troupe The Chippendales, it seemed 1992 hadn’t done with us yet in the utter shite stakes. You may not be surprised that WWF Superstars was the idea of Simon Cowell. Here’s @TOTPFacts:

Hmm. It reminds me of a scene from one of my favourite ever films Stardust starring David Essex which tells the story of the rise of fictional rock star Jim MacLaine. After he has split from his band and gone solo, MacLaine’s manager Mike (played by Adam Faith) plans a worldwide TV and cinema simultaneous broadcast of a concert to promote MacLaine’s latest album. A conversation between Mike and Jim’s American manager Porter Lee Austin (played by Larry Hagman) plays out like this:

Mike: See, what we do is this. We get the cinemas and TV companies all over the world to put up a big enough advance to cover the cost of the album and the show. Well, I mean that way we can’t lose. I mean…If they can pick up money putting on boxing shows, just think what we can pick up putting Jim MacLaine on satellite. For every one boxing fan there must be at least 5,000 pop fans. I mean, to coincide with the concert what we can do is put the album out worldwide. Well, just think of all that promotion Porter Lee. It’s all or nothing this one Porter…

Porter Lee: What kind of concert Mike?

Mike: Don’t worry about the concert eh? Just leave that to me. I tell you one thing, it be like something you’ve ever seen before

Porter Lee: That’s a pretty good idea Mike. Maybe I can do something.

Mike: He’ll be bigger than Aldof Hitler after this lot.

OK, we probably didn’t need the Hitler reference but you get my drift. The WWF Superstars single was called “Slam Jam” (presumably after a wrestling move?) and it was, of course, dreadful. Produced by Mike Stock and Pete Waterman (it just gets worse doesn’t it?), the vinyl came in a poster sleeve bag as I recall (Cowell never misses a marketing trick) and it would reach No 4 in the charts. I’m guessing it was bought by 10 year old boys because if not, I have no idea how to explain what occurred here.

“Connecticut, we have a problem”. Host Mark Franklin advises us that there was meant to be an exclusive satellite performance by Diana Ross of her latest single “If We Hold On Together” from Connecticut but technical problems have put paid to that so we have to make do with the official video instead. To be honest, I’m not too fussed either way.

Now this was taken from the soundtrack to the Universal Pictures animated film The Land Before Time but I’m confused because it came out in 1988 so why was a song from it a hit in the UK four years later? I can only assume it had a terrestrial TV premiere around this time. Another thing that’s confusing me is what this video is that TOTP are showing? I can’t find it on YouTube. The only one I came across featured wall to wall scenes from the film whereas the TOTP version also includes footage of Diana herself. To add to the mystery, Wikipedia says there was no official video for the song. Maybe there wasn’t in 1988 but there was in 1992? I refer you to my earlier comment. I’m not really fussed either way.

As for the song, it sounded exactly as you expected it would. Basically “Somewhere Out There” from An American Tail. “If We Hold On Together” peaked at No 11.

One of the surprise breakout stars of 1992 were KWS who bagged an unlikely No 1 with their cover of KC And The Sunshine Band’s “Please Don’t Go”. A Top 10 follow up (another cover of George McRae’s “Rock Me Baby”) consolidated their success. On reflection, KWS were like the soul version of Undercover. However, by the end of the year their shtick was starting to wear thin. Yet another cover version was chosen as their third single release of the year – “Hold Back The Night” by The Trammps – but to spice it up a bit, they (or more likely their management) decided to team up with the original hitmakers on the track.

Now it’s easy in this performance to see who are The Trammps as they’re the older fellas who have taken their tuxedos and bow ties out of the back of the wardrobe. I’m assuming the KWS guys are the two on keyboards at either end of The Trammps but are they ‘K’, ‘W’ or ‘S’? Remember that their band name came from the initials of the band’s surnames – King / Williams / St. Joseph. And where was the one that wasn’t there?

“Hold Back The Night” peaked at No 30.

Ah the Breakers. Marvellous! After the Boney M “Megamix” single last week, there’s another one tonight courtesy of Gloria Estefan. Known as “Miami Hit Mix” in the UK, this was to promote Gloria’s first “Greatest Hits” album which was a huge seller over Xmas reaching No 2 and eventually going triple platinum in the UK. I recall that by opening time on Xmas Eve, the only chart stock line that we had ran out of in the Our Price in Rochdale where I was working was the cassette version of the album. We knew we had some on order that were due to come in on the day but the record company were out of stock when the delivery came in. Ian the store manager wasn’t too arsed saying “nobody will find it anywhere else in Rochdale today”. He was probably right. There wasn’t much competition record shop wise in Rochdale. There was somewhere in the Exchange shopping centre but it was very hit and miss and the manager of the place was obsessed with our shop and used to buy his records from us!

Anyway, back to Gloria and the “Miami Hit Mix”. There were five tracks in the medley from various stages of Gloria’s career. You can tell that as they were released under three different Gloria monikers:

SongGloria Moniker
Dr BeatMiami Sound Machine
CongaMiami Sound Machine
Rhythm Is Gonna Get YouGloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine
1-2-3Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine
Get On Your FeetGloria Estefan

As with Boney M, the Xmas party market meant that sales of the single were brisk enough to send it into the Top 10. Also like Boney M, it was the last time Gloria ventured so high in the UK charts.

Fed up of all the cover versions in the charts? Tough because here comes another one courtesy of The Lemonheads. I had no idea who this lot were at the time but their cover of Simon & Garfunkel’s “Mrs Robinson” sounded pretty cool to me back then. According to some of the online reviews I have found, I was in the minority. Ultimateclassicrock.com describe it as ‘terrible’ and ‘meh’. Even Evan Dando himself can’t like it that much as he is on record as hating the original and indeed Paul Simon. So why was their cover even recorded then?

Apparently it was to celebrate the 25th anniversary home video release of The Graduate, the film it features in. The Lemonheads cover brought the band more coverage and success than they’d ever had up to that point. The band had already released four albums to little fanfare since their formation in 1986. The first three had been on indie label Taang! before they were picked up by major Atlantic for their fourth “Lovey”. However, it was fifth album “It’s A Shame About Ray” that would see them gain much wider recognition. Initial pressings of the album didn’t include the “Mrs Robinson” cover but its success meant that the album was re-released with its omission now corrected. It would achieve gold status sales in the UK and a rerelease of the title track brought the band a second Top 40 single the following year.

The pinnacle of the band’s success came with the release of the “Come On Feel The Lemonheads” album in October of 1993 which made the Top 5 in the UK charts. I had transferred from the Our Price in Rochdale to the much bigger store in Stockport by that time. The manager there when I started was a guy called Paul who looked a bit like Evan Dando and certainly the image of Dando on the cover of the album bore that out. Paul moved on to HMV (or was it Virgin?) not long after I got to Stockport. On my first day I asked him what lunch he wanted to go on. He replied “lunch is for wimps”. I visibly gulped.

“Mrs Robinson” peaked at No 19.

Right, what’s this then? 808 State vs UB40? What the Hell? Electronic dance music meets reggae pop? Who’s idea was this? OK, that’s enough questions. Time for some answers. Well, I haven’t got many to be fair. This remix of the Brummies 1981 Top 10 single “One In Ten” came from the Mancs’ fourth studio album “Gorgeous” which featured other guest artists like Ian McCulloch. Why they chose to tackle UB40’s unemployment referencing classic I’m not sure. Judging by some of the comments on YouTube against the single’s video, people are very divided on whether the remix was genius or a crime. For me, I’m always going to favour the original.

The remix of “One In Ten” peaked at No 17. 808 State would not return to the Top 20 for another five years when they did so with another collaboration, this time with James Dean Bradfield of Manic Street Preachers on “Lopez”.

After all the cover versions and medleys, here’s a proper, original song courtesy of Madonna. I say original but “Deeper And Deeper” does delve into one of her most iconic hits when it morphs into “Vogue” in the coda. Oh, and there’s a “La Isla Bonita” borrowing bridge that features flamenco guitar and castanets. And…it does pinch some lyrics from “Do-Re-Mi” from The Sound Of Music. Apart from that though, totally original.

“Deeper And Deeper” peaked at No 6.

There’s only two weeks to Xmas so Cliff Richard is making his move for the festive No 1 with “I Still Believe In You”. He resorts to his usual over emoting performance tricks that he’s been peddling for years. I’m sure it’s just a case of slowing down with age but he could mix it up a bit. The other thing that doesn’t seem to have changed for years is Cliff’s hair. It seems to have been the same since the mid 80s at least. Cliff mate, it’s 1992 and you’re still sporting a mullet! Now granted I myself cultivated one during the period ‘84-‘86. Not a Chris Waddle but it was definitely long at the back. It was fashionable back then. By 1987 though, mine was gone forever. Cliff on the other hand was determined to keep the style going single handedly…erm headedly.

Cliff never did make the Xmas No 1 this year because of this next record…

A second week at No 1 for Whitney Houston with “I Will Always Love You” and I think it was becoming obvious by this point that this was no ordinary record. I don’t have actual sales figures to hand but in the Our Price in Rochdale, it felt like it was outselling everything else in the Top 5 combined. With just a couple of weeks to go to Xmas, the idea of there being a race to be the festive chart topper felt like delusion. It was never in doubt.

Order of appearance ArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Take ThatCould It Be MagicGood cover but I wasn’t buying Take That thank you very much!
2Freddie MercuryIn My DefenceI did not
3ShaiIf I Ever Fall In LoveNah
4WWF SuperstarsSlam JamAs if
5Diana RossIf We Hold On TogetherNever happening
6KWS / The TrammpsHold Back The NightNope
7Gloria EstefanMiami Hit MixNo
8The LemonheadsMrs RobinsonLiked it, didn’t buy it
9808 State vs UB40One In TenNot for me
10MadonnaDeeper And DeeperNegative
11Cliff RichardI Still Believe In YouThe feeling is not reciprocated Cliff
12Whitney HoustonI Will Always Love YouAnd no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0017731/top-of-the-pops-10121992

TOTP 22 AUG 1991

Welcome back to TOTP Rewind where I’m pretty sure we are about to witness the very last time that Bruno Brookes hosted the show. Yes, that annoying little git that seems have been hanging around forever is about to be deprived of one of his regular gigs and it’s come not a moment too soon as far as I’m concerned. I wonder if he knew this would be his last appearance at the time? Obviously it wasn’t just Bruno who was being ousted though. The great TOTP ‘Year Zero” cull that happened in October 1991 would take out all of those Radio 1 DJs that had been inviting themselves into our sitting rooms every Thursday for years in one fell swoop. We will see valedictory appearances by Mark Goodier, Jakki Brambles, Simon Mayo, Nicky Campbell and Gary Davies in the weeks to come. I wasn’t particularly a fan of any of them but Brookes was such an irritating little runt (yes that’s ‘runt’ although it could easily have been another word ending in ‘-unt’) that I think it’s his removal that pleases me the most. Despite his TOTP dismissal, he still had his Radio 1 post that he had been in since 1984 and somehow he would survive for another four years there before new Head of Radio 1 Production Trevor Dann axed him with the infamous words “…Why is Bruno on? You know, he seems to have a charmed life, because if the view was ‘we must get rid of the dinosaurs’, you know we’ve got this behemoth striding the airwaves of dawn”. Anyway, lets see if Brookes makes a decent fist of his last show or if he makes a few howlers like always…

He starts off with zero controversy (even his usually elaborate wardrobe has been toned down) as he introduces someone else making their final TOTP appearance on the show in Midge Ure. I was listening to some Ultravox on Spotify earlier and some of their Ure-period stuff was pretty good. I’m thinking about the likes of “All Stood Still”, “Hymn” and “Dancing With Tears In My Eyes” rather than the pompous “Vienna” (which I never liked that much) and the frankly ridiculous “We Came To Dance”. A lot of Midge’s solo stuff paled in comparison to his Ultravox high points. Some of it was OK but even his most successful stuff like surprise 1985 No 1 “If I Was” I found laborious and uninspiring. “Cold Cold Heart” was hardly electrifying and could be filed under the category of ‘meh’.

Although he’s got rid of his horrid ponytail, Midge still has a cracking pair of sideburns on display here. Pretty bold stuff as I don’t remember them being an essential male fashion accessory back then. Of course, these days Midge is actually bald rather than bold. The rather ham fisted attempt to show off the song’s Celtic credentials at the end via the use of three tympanum drums looks a bit daft to me. “Cold Cold Heart” peaked at No 17.

Oh, here we go…what’s Bruno on about now? There are two records at No 21 in the chart run down? What?! For once, Brookes hasn’t made a right ricket as there were two No 21 records that week. Apparently Oceanic and Sophie Lawrence had pulled in the same amount of sales and so, after the furore the previous year surrounding the Dee-Lite / Steve Miller Band debate about who should have been No 1 after sharing the exact number of sales, Gallup had made the policy not to try and separate artists in these circumstances but would instead grant them equal chart billing.

The soundtrack to this unusual countdown was supplied by The Prodigy who were having a huge hit with their debut single “Charly”. Infamously sampling the 1970s BBC Public Information Film Charley Says, I for one did not see them becoming such huge players in the dance scene of the 90s and beyond off the back of it. That mining of vintage Childrens TV programs as source material for dance tracks would become a thing of sorts . Following in the steps of “Charly” came amongst others Smart E’s “Sesame’s Treet”, Urban Hype’s “A Trip to Trumpton” and “Roobarb & Custard” by ShaFt. This short-lived genre even had a name which I was unaware of until now which was ‘Toytown Techno’.

I would come to appreciate The Prodigy much more as the decade wore on and their Glastonbury performance of 1997 remains spectacular. For now though, I think I almost dismissed “Charly” as a novelty. Maybe I just didn’t like to be reminded of those 70s public informations films, of which none were more scary than this one:

“Rave on!” exclaims Bruno at the end of the Prodigy video sounding like he was auditioning for a part in Peter Kay’s Phoenix Nights. The turd. Right, here’s somebody new even if the song had been out before. Nothing to do with Elkie Brooks (that was “Sunshine After The Rain”), this little pop nugget was called “Sunshine On A Rainy Day” and was written by legendary producer Youth for his then girlfriend Zoë but it failed to find an audience when originally released in 1990 when it peaked at No 53. However a remix by Mark “Spike” Stent earned it a second shot at the charts and this time it powered all the way to a high of No 4. Youth seemed to be preoccupied with writing songs about rain back then as he also co-wrote Blue Pearl’s 1990 hit “Naked In The Rain”.

Zoë’s hit song though captured something of the essence of 1991 it seemed to me. Was it the mix of hypnotic dance beats with a folky song structure or just that uplifting, sing-a-long chorus pre-fixed with a shout of ‘Yay!’ from Zoë that so beguiled? Or was it just that Zoë herself cut quite the pop star figure in this performance? I seem to remember a few male work colleagues being quite taken with her.

Sadly for Zoë, it never got any bigger or better than this for her as a singer. One minor Top 40 hit followed called “Lightning” but her album “Scarlet Red And Blue” disappointed commercially. She returned with a new rock sound in 1996 with a song called “Hammer” which seemed to be trying to ride on the Alanis Morissette bandwagon but nobody noticed nor cared. After its failure, she left the music business to become a sculptor and potter although she has since recorded material under the alias Hephzibah Broom.

So The Prodigy creating Toytown Techno proved to be a case of “What Can You Do For Me” and passed me by completely but an act sampling proper pop records and making them into dance anthems proved to be “Something Good” I could get behind. OK, enough for the puns but I have always had a soft spot for Utah Saints. Their ambition according to themselves was to get rock ‘n’ roll into rave and they achieved this by sampling Eurythmics’ “There Must Be An Angel (Playing With My Heart)” and Gwen Guthrie’s “Ain’t Nothin’ Goin’ On But The Rent” to outstanding effect.

Originating from the Leeds club scene where they hosted their own nights, their name was nothing to do with toothy 70s boy band The Osmonds who hailed from Ogden, Utah. No, here’s @TOTPFacts with the real story behind that name:

So now you know. Anyway, they hit big immediately with their debut single “What Can You Do For Me” making the Top 10. Now I’ve read both Dave Stewart’s autobiography and a biography of Annie Lennox and I don’t remember anything in either about there being a dispute between Annie and Dave about allowing Utah Saints to use a sample of “There Must Be An Angel (Playing With My Heart)” as Bruno Brookes suggests there is. “Annie Lennox wanted it banned but Dave Stewart thinks it’s a smash. What do you think?” he rambles in his intro. I can’t find any mention of it online either. In fact the only Utah Saints / Annie Lennox reference I found was that they did a remix of one of her solo singles (“Little Bird”) in 1993 so she can’t have been that pissed off with them.

Another song that made it to No 10 in the charts was this one from Jason Donovan although Brookes can’t resist one final incorrect chart prediction when he says that it’s “no doubt a future No 1”. Maybe he was basing his forecast on the fact that Jase’s last single “Any Dream Will Do” had gone to No 1. That song’s success though was backed up by Donovan performing it live twice a day all week at the London Palladium in the lead role of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. A little naive I think from Bruno to think that chucking out an unimaginative cover of “Happy Together” by The Turtles would repeat the trick. Not that there’s anything wrong with the song – I love the original version – but Donovan’s take on it brought nothing new to the table at all. It just seemed a lazy choice of song and indeed it had been cynically shoe horned onto his recent Greatest Hits album presumably with the intention of releasing it as a single all along.

Even Donovan can’t really be arsed to sell the record too much in this performance. At one point he does a Paul McCartney ‘whacky tombs aloft’ gesture for some reason and then his panicked facial expression immediately afterwards gives away that he suddenly thought what did I did that for?! “Happy Together” was Jason’s final UK Top 10 hit.

It’s that song by Karyn White that was a Breaker last week next. It turns out that Karyn is quite the businesswoman. She started her own music label and entertainment company in 2011 called Karyn White Enterprise Inc and also runs a successful interior design and real estate business. Not content with that, she’s also tried her hand at acting and is still recording with her last release being in 2018. If only she had given video directing a shot as well – it may have livened up the video for “Romantic”. The ‘storyline’ for it as listed on the IMDB database is this:

The music video begins with Karyn White pulling up in a sports car. She sings as she wears pearl necklaces against a gray background. A group of dancers strike poses throughout.

Seruously?! Did somebody pitch that as an idea and got the gig?! “Romantic” peaked at No 23.

“Onto more rave” announces Bruno as we head into the No 21 hit (of which there are two of course this week) sound of Oceanic with “Insanity”. Now you know me, I could never be described as a dance head but after Utah Saints earlier, this is the second dance anthem of the show that I didn’t mind at all. I think it was that huge, euphoric chorus or maybe even the key change at the finale. There seemed to be much more of a traditional song structure to it than some of the other dance tracks of the time. Here’s David Harry of the band on that very subject courtesy of @TOTPFacts:

OK, well the comparison between Oceanic and Nirvana slightly undermines the point but I think you get the gist.

What? You want to hear about my Oceanic story? Oh OK. Well, I was once at a freebie record company do (possibly the Ricky Ross album playback) whilst I was working for Our Price and I’d arrived at the venue before any of my colleagues. I’m not great at parties anyway so I found myself mooching around feeling lost. I spotted someone else who appeared to be experiencing the same thing so I decided maybe we could help each other out by striking up a conversation. The person who I started chatting to was *that lady from Oceanic! It turned out she was feeling exactly the same as me and was glad of someone to talk to. Eventually my colleagues and her friends turned up and our time together was over – cue lots of questions from my contingent about who I had been talking to and what did we say to each other. All I remember is that she was very nice and that I learned that her friends she was at the event with were in the middle of some legal action about the songwriting credits to Gina G’s hit “Ooh Aah… Just a Little Bit”.

“Insanity” peaked at No 3 and was the best selling dance single of the year and the ninth best selling overall outselling nine No 1 records in the process. Let’s hope whoever wrote it got their just royalties.

*I should give the lady her proper name which is Jorinde Williams although to be fair to me they did call their album “That Album By Oceanic”.

Martika is back! Yes, she of “Toy Soldiers” fame back in 1989 had returned and with a credible song. How so? Well “Love… Thy Will Be Done” was written by Prince of course and much was made of that at the time I seem to remember. It didn’t strike me as an obvious collaboration I have to say but then if you think about it, he has worked with / written songs for loads of different people. There’s even a Prince family tree online which lists them all. Under the section People who recorded songs written or co-written by Prince you’ll find Martika along with Madonna, (Chaka, Chaka, Chaka) Chaka Khan, Sheena Easton, Sheila E, Paula Abdul, The Bangles, Celine Dion, Kenny Rogers and of course Sinead O’Connor. If he could write songs for Celine Dion then Martika wasn’t that big of a stretch! As for the song, I quite liked it – a much more mature sound (that’s the word all the music press used anyway). Bizarrely its drums and bass backing do not vary at all throughout the song in terms of bpm yet somehow it just works.

“Love… Thy Will Be Done” was from Martika’s second album “Martika’s Kitchen” which performed well in Europe but poorly in her native US. The title track would be issued as a single and was a return to the more poppier fare that I would have expected from her.

“Love… Thy Will Be Done” peaked at No 9 on the UK Top 40.

Yet another dance tune as we start the Breakers section with “Lift” / “Open Your Mind” by 808 State. Like previous singles “Cubik” / “Olympic” and “In Yer Face”, this was taken from the band’s third album “ex:el” but unlike those tracks which both went Top 10, the spreadsheet formulas for chart success didn’t work for “Lift” / “Open Your Mind” and it stalled at No 38. I didn’t mind this but to my untrained ear were they all starting to sound a bit the same? Maybe it didn’t matter if you were on the dance floor with chemical substances coursing through you which I wasn’t at this time.

What?! Tin Machine?! F*****g Tin Machine are on TOTP?! In my mind, Bowie’s much maligned super group project had disappeared after their first album in 1989 but having checked out their discography on Wikipedia, I do remember the cover of the second album (“Tin Machine II”) from working in Our Price. I don’t recall this track (“You Belong In Rock n’ Roll”) though. Apparently it was released in a blaze of publicity (it clearly had no effect on me) but it struggled to a chart high of just No 33. Even that paltry chart placing for the musical legend that Bowie is/was turned out to be Tin Machine’s biggest hit. The band had to change labels from EMI to Victory Music to even get that second album released as the lack of hit singles on their debut album had freaked EMI out and they got cold feet about the whole project.

Apparently there’s a studio performance in the next TOTP repeat that involves a chocolate eclair but I’ll keep my powder dry on that one until next time….

Following “The Joker” by the Steve Miller Band and “Should I Stay or Should I Go” by The Clash into our charts comes the next vintage track to be reactivated for a Levi’s TV advert. “20th Century Boy” was originally a No 3 hit for T. Rex in 1973 but it was chosen to front the latest Lev’s ad campaign in 1991 and re-issued curiously as being by Marc Bolan and T.Rex.

The advert itself features a very young Brand Pitt and the single’s success in 1991 (it peaked at No 13) , just like The Clash, sparked the release of a T.Rex Best Of album called “The Ultimate Collection ” which, backed by a TV Ad campaign, went to No 4 in the album charts.

It’s a great song and as much as I had a weakness for them, is sooo much better than – “21st Century Boy” by Sigue Sigue Sputnik.

So it’s been a “healthy” chart Brookes advises us before we get to the No 1. Not sure what standards he’s applying to the nations’s pop choices there but it is still suffering from an extreme case of ‘Adamsitis’ as “(EverythingI Do) I Do It For You” by Bryan Adams is still at the summit of the Top 40 for the seventh week running. OK, what can I dredge up about this song that hasn’t already been said so far. My own personal opinion of it? Sure…

Question: Is it a terrible song?

Me: No, but it has a deservedly terrible reputation. No song should be No 1 for 16 weeks.

Question: Ah, so you like it then?

Me: It’s not up there with his best material but I didn’t mind it on first hearing. After the 10th, 20th, 100th time, it lost its appeal certainly.

Question: Did you buy it?

Me: No. I never even considered it. It was so inescapable that even if I’d really liked it, there would have been no point – you heard it all the time anyway.

The play out video is “Mind” by The Farm. It seemed as though this lot’s time in the sun was coming to an end by this point. After the glory of two consecutive Top 10 singles in 1990, impetus had been lost and subsequent singles “Sinful! (Scary Jiggin’ with Doctor Love)” with Pete Wylie and “Don’t Let Me Down” failed to crack the Top 20.

Still, not to worry, they had lots of new tunes up their sleeve and “Mind” was the first of those being the lead single from second album “Love See No Colour”. Unfortunately that also failed the Top 20 test and also the Top 30 one as well when it stalled at No 31. In truth, it’s not a great song, lacking the groove of ..erm…”Groovy Train” and the hook of “All Together Now”‘s rousing chorus. It also had some seriously terrible lyrics:

Remember all the good times that we had
Remember those days they were never sad
All our hopes and all our dreams
All our crazy mixed up schemes

I’d have been embarrassed by those in 5th form.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Midge UreCold Cold HeartMouldy old fart more like – no
2The Prodigy CharlyNo
3ZoëSunshine On A Rainy DayLiked it, didn’t buy it
4Utah SaintsWhat Can You Do For MeSee 3 above
5Jason DonovanHappy TogetherHell no
6Karyn WhiteRomanticNah
7Oceanic InsanityNo but I didn’t tell Jorinde that
8Martika Love… Thy Will Be DoneNope
9808 StateLift / “Open Your MindGuess what? No
10Tin Machine You Belong In Rock n’ RollThis belonged in the bin – no
11Marc Bolan and T.Rex20th Century BoyNot the re-release but I have it on a Best Of CD
12Bryan Adams(EverythingI Do) I Do It For YouI think we’ve already established the answer to that question
13The FarmMindNegative

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000zwqz/top-of-the-pops-22081991

TOTP 14 FEB 1991

Welcome to TOTP Rewind where we by happy circumstance we find the there is a show scheduled to be broadcast on Valentine’s Day! Yes, the calendar and the stars aligned 30 years ago meaning that music could be the food of love so let’s see which beautiful ballads would have given all those lovers out there excess of it…

….hmm. Well, the title of the song is romantic I guess but “I Wanna Give You Devotion” by Nomad was hardly a traditional love song. In fact, it you check out the lyrics, there doesn’t seem to be anything about plighting one’s troth in them at all. In fact, it’s all rather dark as rapper MC Mikee Freedom (no double ‘e’ no points) bangs on about nightmares, the night creeping in and uses words such as ‘frightening’, ‘spooky’ and ‘terrorise’ to get his point across. And what was this point exactly? Well, but seems to be political as at one point he raps:

Poll tax came and up went the rise
Open your eyes and realise
I’m a truly disguise
Like hawk, the slayer, he came and courted
Maggie came, but now she’s slaughtered

I’m guessing not too many couples slow danced the night away to this one. To be fair, I’m sure it did pull in the punters onto the dance floor across the nation’s nightclubs but probably to wig out rather than canoodle.

“I Wanna Give You Devotion” peaked at No 2.

Talking of wigs… here comes Kylie Minogue with her video for “What Do I Have To Do?”, the one where she sports loads of different hairstyles which are, of course, mostly false hair pieces. It’s a pretty nifty little dance tune but again, hardly the stuff romantic nights in are made of. Whatever your opinion about Kylie, you can’t deny that she was prolific. This was her 12th single release in three years and she’d also released three albums in that time.

Going back to the video, @TOTPFacts dug out a nice behind the scenes piece about how it was filmed including a slow motion sequence which entailed the track being speeded up. I’ve watched the video back in full and I really don’t think the effect achieved was worth the effort. It was hardly up there with the reverse sequences in Danny Wilson’s “Second Summer Of Love” video when they had to mime to the vocals backwards. Also, anyone suggesting you can’t tell the difference between Kylie’s normal vocals and the speeded up ones is just cruel.

An actual song with the word ‘love’ in the title next but again it’s hardly a big, slushy Valentine’s Day number. As with Nomad earlier, “You Got The Love” was a huge dance anthem courtesy of The Source featuring Candi Staton. Though I just seemed to accept that of course she was the vocalist, in retrospect, was it quite an odd pairing? After all, Candi hadn’t had a Top 40 hit in the UK since 1982 when a version of “Suspicious Minds” made No 31 and anyway, she was surely best known for her 1976 disco classic “Young Hearts Run Free” and her cover of The Bee Gees “Nights On Broadway” the following year. Well, that’s all I knew about her anyway. Years after “You Got The Love”, I worked with a guy who swore by Candi Staton and was probably appalled by my rudimentary knowledge of her back catalogue. Looking at her discography, she has actually released 28 albums over the course of her recording career bu then she doesn’t do things by halves – she’s also been married six times.

The 1991 version of “You Got The Love” peaked at No 4.

Definitely not a Valentine’s Day tune was “In Yer Face” by 808 State. By this point, these Manc lads were getting the hang of this pop star business as “In Yer Face” was their third consecutive Top 10 hit in their own right after “Pacific State” and “Cubik” / “Olympic” and their fourth if you include “The Only Rhyme That Bites” with MC Tunes. Pretty impressive stuff from a bunch of lads whose origins lay in their shared love of a record store. To be fair, It’s a legendary record store. Eastern Bloc was where all the cool people bought their music. Situated on Oldham Street in Manchester’s historic Northern Quarter district, it was the purveyor of dance music of every hue – house, techno, drum and bass etc it was all here mostly on vinyl and a lot of it stock was imports. I think I went in once during my 10 years of living in Manchester (mainly just to say I’d been in there) and I certainly didn’t buy anything (not being, you know, cool and that). Apparently there used to be a rule that if a punter came in Eastern Bloc and didn’t know anybody behind the counter, then you wouldn’t get served! I know record shops in general could have that image of being staffed by sniffy musos behind the counter who would openly jeer at a punter’s purchase choices but that’s weapons grade pomposity!

Anyway, when owner Martin Price got together with regular customers Graham Massey and Gerald Simpson, the seeds of the group were sown and with a couple of additions to the membership in DJs Andrew Barker and Darren Partington and the departure of Simpson, the classic 808 State line up was established. “In Yer Face” was from the band’s third studio album “ex:el” (which was their biggest selling album peaking at No 4) and was about as far removed from a romantic ballad as it was possible to be. That grinding, almost sinister back beat combined with some out there samples trickery and the only vocal being a disembodied voice saying ‘In Your face’, it was quite unnerving to a pop kid like me.

Price left the band shortly after whilst Eastern Bloc relocated to Stevenson Square in Manchester City centre in 2011. Unsurprisingly, I have yet to visit it in its current location.

As host Gary Davies says, the highest climber this week is a song that was 21 years old back in 1991. So why was “Alright Now” by Free back in the Top 40 in 1991? Do you even have to ask? Inevitably, it was due to its inclusion in an advert of course, specifically this advert:

Well, it made a change from Levis I suppose. With “Alright Now” climbing the charts, Island records released a Best Of album tie-in entitled rather boringly “The Best Of Free: All Right Now” which sold surprisingly well going silver in the UK. I say surprisingly because Free only ever had five UK chart hits and two of those were “Alright Now”.

Obviously I was already acquainted with the track before its 1991 reissue as its one of those songs that has received constant radio play down the years and routinely features in those Greatest Rock Songs of all time polls. If anything, it has completely overshadowed the rest of their output and in a Songfacts interview, drummer Simon Kirke, confirmed this when he commented “It became a bit of an albatross around our necks, I have to say. Even though it elevated Free into the big leagues, it became a bit of an albatross because we couldn’t follow it.” Albatross or not, it has been covered by the likes of Rod Stewart, Mike Oldfield, Christina Aguilera, the Runaways and ..erm…Pepsi & Shirlie. No really. Look…

Oh and indeed, dear. By the way, it’s suitability as a Valentine’s Day song was very much in doubt due to the lyrics being about a man picking up a woman purely for sex and when the ‘L’ word gets mentioned, her reply is:


She said love, Lord above
Now you’re tryin’ to trick me in love

The 1991 re-release of “Alright Now” peaked at No 8 having made it all the way to No 2 in 1970.

Some nice Valentine’s themed segue work from Gary Davies next as he manages to get in a plug for World Gold Heart day raising money for the Variety Club before introducing “Every Beat Of The Heart” by The Railway Children. Finally, a love song on Valentine’s Day! Or is it? If you actually analyse the lyrics, it seems to be a break up song. Check out this opening verse:

That’s some angry sky behind me
But I don’t need you here to guide me
Identify too familiar ground
And I’ll keep away, I’ll keep away

It doesn’t get any better in the chorus when lead singer Gary Newby sings:

Every beat of the heart
Brings me closer to the start
Takes me further away from you
Brings me closer to the truth

Damn these song lyrics getting in the way of a neatly themed post!

So who were The Railway Children? Named after the film starring a young Jenny Agutter, they were actually signed initially to Factory and very much darlings of the mid 80s indie scene. However, there’s is a well told story of not wanting to be a cult band forever and seeking out bigger commercial success. A move to Virgin and touring spots supporting REM and Lloyd Cole exposed them to a larger audience and eventually they scored a bona fide No 24 chart hit with “Every Beat Of The Heart” from their third album “Native Place” when it was re-released after peaking at No 68 in 1990. It’s a great little pure pop song with an indie twang and they looked set for those bigger things they desired on the back of it. I remember there being a rush in demand for their album and not being able to get it into the store as Virgin temporarily withdrew it presumably while they decided how to promote it. I would see this record company practice a number of times over the years and it was intensely annoying for customers and record staff alike (see also Nirvana when “Smells Like Teen Spirit” broke and “Nevermind” was withdrawn).

And then….nothing. Subsequent single releases from the album failed to get anywhere near the Top 40 and they would become just what they didn’t want – a one hit wonder. Musical differences within the band then arose as they searched for a new direction and they split not long after although since 2016 the original line up has reunited to perform some festival gigs.

As with The Railway Children before him, Chris Isaak‘s new single was actually an old single having originally been released in 1987. “Blue Hotel” was taken from his eponymous second album and had tanked on its original outing peaking at No 100. However, it was crucially one of the tracks included on the rapidly compiled “Wicked Game” compilation album in early 1991 which was designed to be an introduction to Isaak’s canon of work for the newly initiated in the light of the success of the “Wicked Game” single. Hence, it was plucked from obscurity for another tilt at the Top 40 and hey presto! Another hit! It’s the very definition of moody and, to my ears, was a good choice as a more uptempo follow up to its predecessor. Again, as with The Railway Children, I recall there being a demand for his back catalogue but a lot of it was unavailable in this country but I think our shop got a few copies in on import.

Despite its yearning qualities, the lyrics (yet again) don’t imbue the song with a natural romantic quality. Instead they concern lonely highways and life not working out Chris’s way. In short, it’s mournful for a lost love rather than celebratory of a current one. I liked it though. It stuck out as an antidote to all those dance anthems and he looked as cool as f**k even in that vile suit.

“Blue Hotel” peaked at No 17 second time around.

It’s that spooky “Only You” song by Praise next. Combining electronic and world music (Wikipedia assures me the genre is called ethnic electronica), it featured the vocals of Miriam Stockley who has quite an address book full of contacts. She has provided backing vocals for tracks by the likes of Roger Daltrey, Thomas Dolby, Queen and multiple SAW artists. Oh and Nik Kershaw (ahem). As for its Valentine’s Day credentials, I think I would be a bit freaked out to say the least if I’d just entered into a romantic relationship with someone who wanted this to be our song. Plus there’s the subject of those pesky, lyrics again. Now I can’t work out what on earth Miriam is singing about but according to the internet, the opening lines are:

Whip, whip, whip
Whip, whip, whip
Whip, whip, whip
Whip like that
Whip, whip, whip
Whip
Whip like that
Whip like that
Whip like that
We suffer everyday, what is it for?

WTAF?! Surely not?

Despite Gary Davies’ assertion that it could be No 1 next week, “Only You” would speak at No 4.

Definitely not a love song is the new No 1 which is “Do The Bartman” by The Simpsons. I really can’t explain the success of this single. Yes, The Simpsons was pulling in the ratings in the US but in the UK it had only been on air a few months and even then only on Sky which the majority of the public didn’t have access to. And it isn’t even funny – surely humour is an essential ingredient of a novelty record? As I was one of those who knew little of the programme, I assumed that Bart must be the lead character but surely, in retrospect, we all agree that Homer is the true comedy heart of the show don’t we?

We arrive at the final track of the night and by my reckoning we haven’t had one single, genuine love song on a show being broadcast on Valentine’s Day. Weren’t there any suitable candidates that were going up the charts or new entries?

*checks chart rundown*

There was a new entry which actually had ‘love’ in the title! Oh hang on – it’s “Love Rears Its Ugly Head” By Living Colour. Yeah, I don’t think that title fits the bill somehow. But wait! There was a band with the word ‘Valentine” in their name! An open goal for the TOTP producers surely? Ah, it’s My Bloody Valentine. Not sure some guitar feedback from a bunch of shoe gazers who performed a half hour interlude of noise in their gigs is going to work either. How about “Get Here” by Oleta Adams then? Perfect and it’s going up the charts. What? It was on last week? Ok, I’ve got it. An unlikely saviour but it just might work. “Beautiful Love” by Julian Cope. That’ll do. He’s on next week you say? Oh forget it then!

So what do we sign off with? Well, it’s a good old rocker by Jimmy Barnes with INXS. Despite being one of the most popular and best-selling Australian music artists of all time, I have to admit to not knowing much about Barnes but I do know that this collaboration with INXS was a cover of a tune originally recorded by 60s Aussie band The Easybeats (of “Friday On My Mind” fame). “Good Times” was in the charts due to its inclusion on the soundtrack of The Lost Boys film which was shown on BBC on New Year’s Day this year hence the renewed interest in it. There was a trend for this sort of thing around this time. We’d already seen Berlin and Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes back in the charts on the back of terrestrial TV film premieres. The Lost Boys is a great film though and one of those that I pretty much will always watch if I stumble over it while channel flicking.

The Jimmy Barnes / INXS version of “Good Times” peaked at No 18.

For posterity’s sake, I include the chart run down below:

Order of AppearanceArtistTitleDid I Buy It?
1NomadI Wanna Give You DevotionNope
2Kylie MinogueWhat Do I Have To Do?No
3The Source featuring Candi StatonYou Got The LoveGood tune but no
4808 StateIn Yer FaceNot really my bag
5FreeAlright NowNah
6The Railway ChildrenEvery Beat Of The HeartNo but I probably should have
7Chris IsaakBlue HotelNo but my wife had the Wicked Game compilation album with it on
8PraiseOnly YouNo thanks
9Do The BartmanThe SimpsonsAs if
10Jimmy Barnes / INXSGood TimesNegative

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000wvlx/top-of-the-pops-14021991

TOTP 22 NOV 1990

22nd Nov 1990. A momentous date in British history. Why? Thatcher was finally going after her Cabinet refused to back her in a second round of leadership elections. I’m pretty sure I was in work with my newly acquired Xmas temp job at Our Price when the news broke. A Downing Street statement was issued at 09.30 in the morning after Thatcher had informed her Cabinet and the Queen of her decision to stand down. The timing of the news meant that the whole day would have been taken up discussing it (whilst serving some customers as well no doubt). I was just 10 years old when Thatcher came to power. I was now a married man of 22. This was huge. I have a memory that I couldn’t quite believe it when I first heard. After all, less than 24 hours earlier she had vowed to ‘fight on and fight to win’ after winning the first round of the leadership contest but not with the required majority. I should state that I wasn’t in a state of denial and couldn’t accept what had happened – I despised Thatcher and her government. It was just that it felt like her reign would never end and then suddenly, she was done. It didn’t seem real. There was a very staunch socialist working in the shop at the time who was besides himself with excitement the whole day. There was no mention of the news on that night’s TOTP although host Anthea Turner, whom I’m pretty sure she is a Tory supporter, seems to be sporting a rather sensible haircut that would prove to be an inspiration for Theresa May decades later. That apart, the BBC steered clear of any political comment. Enough of the politics though, who were the acts that were campaigning for your sales to make them the new chart leader?

We start with new chart sensations EMF who have gone Top 5 already with “Unbelievable” and were no doubt eyeing that No 1 spot. I’d certainly never heard of them before their Smash Hits Poll Winners Party slot but apparently the ‘buzz’ around the band had been building for a while. When they toured as support for Adamski, there were more EMF baseball caps and T-shirts sold than the “Killer” hit maker’s. As a result the group were banned from selling merchandise in the concert venues. With a loyal following in place and a fantastic, fresh sound, they seemed destined to have a No 1 record…..

…and then this bloke happened! If it’s late 1990, it must be Vanilla Ice! Rising to the attention of the UK via the same route as EMF (appearing on the Smash Hits Poll Winners Party), it seems crazy to recall now but Vanilla Ice wasn’t always regarded as a complete joke. I’m fairly confident that his “Under Pressure” sampling hit “Ice Ice Baby” was seen as, if not cutting edge, then inventive? No? How about ‘clever’? Still not having it. OK, ‘resourceful’ then? Right then smart arses, what word would you use? ‘SHITE’. Yes, agreed but I’m taking about back in 1990 without any revisionism in play. Still ‘shite’. Ok, you win. Even so, it was the first ever single by a rap artist to go to No 1 in the US. That must count for something surely?

Very much seen as the white MC Hammer, the two seemed inextricably entwined for a while – Ice toured with Hammer and “Ice Ice Baby” was nominated for a Grammy in the category Best Rap Performance alongside Hammer’s “U Can’t Touch This” (which took the award).

Real name (unbelievably) Robert Van Winkle, Vanilla Ice took “Ice Ice Baby” straight to No 3 (a record highest entry for a new act in the UK Top 40 at the time -it was eventually usurped by Whigfield’s ‘Saturday Night”) before making the short jump to No 1 a week later. We were in the grip of Vanilla Ice fever! Sensing they were onto something potentially very big record company SBK, once the single had hit the top spot in the US also, pulled “Ice Ice Baby” from sale in an attempt to force people to buy Ice’s album “To The Extreme”. It worked as it went onto go 7× Platinum in the States. Like I said, Vanilla Ice fever.

And yet…at some undetermined point, the world seemed to wake up to the fact that we’d all been duped. This guy wasn’t the real deal, he was a fraud! His success disappeared almost as soon as it had started. One further Top 10 single followed (a cover of Wild Cherry’s “Play That Funky Music”) and then…pretty much nothing. No, not nothing, ridicule. Suddenly nobody was owning up to having bought any Vanilla Ice records. The spell was broken and music fans came to their senses. Maybe it had all been a bad dream.

As for Vanilla Ice himself, various career changes were undertaken to maintain his celebrity. An attempt at becoming a serious rapper appealing to the hip hop market fell on deaf ears. There then followed acting, motocross, becoming a Rastafarian and growing dreadlocks and then eventually, inevitably, reality TV. Oh dear. A little part of 1990 however will always remain Vanilla Ice’s. Yo, VIP, let’s kick it!

Perhaps the least remembered of their hits, so what was the deal with The Proclaimers doing a cover of Roger Miller’s “King Of The Road” then? Well it was from a film soundtrack (of course it was), the film in question being an Australian romantic drama called The Crossing – no I’ve never seen it either. Anyway, I should say for all the pedants out there that “King Of The Road” was actually an EP (remember EPs were all the rage in 1990 – The Wedding Present, Ride, Inspiral Carpets etc) with three other tracks on it including their take on a song mostly associated with Johnny Cash called “Long Black Veil”).

The performance by Charlie and Craig here strikes me as a bit odd. Why the tuxedos and bow ties? Is it some sort of ironic comment on the subject of the lyrics (a drifter of no fixed abode)? Then of course there is the Jonathan King sticker on the double bass – that hasn’t aged well. I was only mentioned King in the last post in relation to the Righteous Brothers. I had no idea I would be referring to him again so soon. At the song’s close, the sound seems to dip to almost a whisper. Is that how it was on the record or a sound fault in the studio? Oh and I don’t recall anybody seriously suggesting that “King Of The Road” might be the Xmas No 1 as Anthea informs us. Really?! As it turned out, it peaked at No 9.

Right, who’s idea was this because I need to have a serious word with them? Did we really need a version of “It Takes Two” by Rod Stewart and Tina Turner in our lives? I didn’t. Look, I don’t mind the original by Marvin Gaye and Kim Weston of course but this duet seemed so cynical and… well, just money for old rope. What? It was part of a Pepsi TV advert campaign you say? Well, look I’m not about to take on the might of a multinational corporation so I’ll let this one go.

Rod, of course, was no stranger to cover versions. Just the previous year, he’d had a hit with Tom Waits’ “Downtown Train” and he seems to have spent huge chunks of the latter part of his career churning out covers as part of his “Great American Songbook” series of albums. Rod maintained his Motown theme when he released a single literally called “The Motown Song” in 1991. Both that and “It Takes Two” were included on his “Vagabond Heart” album of the same year.

“It Takes Two” is one of those songs that was made for a duet and as such many, many versions of it have been recorded down the years – Donny and Marie Osmond, Cliff Richard and Cilla Black even Rod returned to it again in 2019 when he partnered with Robbie Williams (yuk!). Even worse than that though was a version by Bruno Brookes and Liz Kershaw! At least such a ghastly creation cold never happen again…could it?

Rod and Tina’s version of “It Takes Two” peaked at No 5.

Ah, this is better – a genuinely affecting (if slightly disturbing) ballad in “Falling” courtesy of Julee Cruise. Sadly, Anthea can’t remember her chart placings and although she has just announced that it is at No 11 this week in her chart rundown section, she then introduces it as being at No 10. FFS! You were hosting a show literally based around the Top 40 Anthea!. These things mattered!

Julee gives a very ethereal performance befitting the song that she is singing. She refuses to look into the camera and her ‘I’m not really here’ persona gives the impression that she has been transported to another far away dimension entirely. I think it worked pretty well.

The song’s co-composer Angelo Badalamenti would achieve another Top 40 hit six years later when he teamed up with James’s Tim Booth for the Booth and the Bad Angel project which produced an album and this single called “I Believe” but really, it sounded just like something from Booth’s day job to me:

Like “It Takes Two” earlier, here’s another song that has been widely covered. Jimmy Somerville‘s take on “To Love Somebody” by the Bee Gees was to promote his “The Singles Collection 1984/1990” which was a big seller over Xmas as I remember. That album seemed to draw a line under Jimmy’s career for a while. It would be another five years before he released his next record and indeed he has only recorded four solo albums in total since 1990.

For someone with such unique vocal talents, a lot of Jimmy’s hits seem to have been cover versions. I’m thinking “Don’t Leave Me This Way and “Never Can Say Goodbye” with The Communards and ” “It Ain’t Necessarily So” and the medley of “I Feel Love / Johnny Remember Me / Love To Love You Baby” with Bronski Beat. Then there’s “You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real)” and this one as a solo artist. I’m not making a judgement just an observation.

“To Love Somebody” was Jimmy’s last Top 10 hit peaking at No 8.

Definitely not a cover version is double A-side “Cubik/Olympic” by 808 State. We get “Cubik” this week and back then, that menacing, heavy dance riff would have sounded exhilarating to me but listening back 31 years later, it makes me feel a sense of dread. Damn you middle age!

To be fair though, even in my 30s I was a delicate flower and I did find myself nearly having a panic attack every time the staff in the Our Price I was working played “Higher State of Consciousness” by Josh Wink over the in-store sound system.

The fourth and final week at No 1 for The Righteous Brothers with “Unchained Melody”. Unlikely as it seems, there is a connection between The Righteous Brothers and Scottish stadium rockers Simple Minds. How so? Erm…simple really. The Minds 1984 single “Speed Your Love To Me” was influenced by the line in “Unchained Melody” ‘God speed your love to me’. When asked in an interview with Songfacts.com if there was a connection, Jim Kerr replied:

Yes, there must have been. We loved that song. I think it was [producer] Steve Lillywhite that said, “You know, there’s, ‘God speed your love to me’ in The Righteous Brothers’ ‘Unchained Melody.'” And, of course, it’s wonderful. Such a great sentiment.

As far as I can tell, Simple minds have never covered “Unchained Melody” and The Righteous Brothers have never given us their take on “Speed Your Love To Me”.

What fresh Hell is this?! Bloody jinxed it didn’t I with my comment about Bruno Brookes and Liz Kershaw before because here they are with the official Children In Need charity single for 1990. Their version of “It Takes Two” had been the previous year’s official single for the charity and it made it all the way to…No 53! Great effort. “Let’s Dance” was the old Chris Montez number and this time Bruno and Liz pulled out all the stops and got the record to…No 54. There have been worse performing Children In Need singles but not many. It’s hardly “Perfect Day” is it?

I always found Brookes and Kershaw’s ‘love-hate’ on air relationship tedious at best and creepy at worst.

For posterity’s sake, I include the chart rundown below:

Order of appearanceArtistSongDid I Buy it?
1EMFUnbelievableUnbelievably not at the time but I did buy a later single of theirs called Afro King, the CD of which was like a mini greatest hits which had it on
2Vanilla IceIce Ice babyNo No baby
3The ProclaimersKing Of The RoadNah
4Rod Stewart and Tina TurnerIt Takes TwoBut not you two – no!
5Julee CruiseFallingNo but it was on that first Q Magazine album that I bought.
6Jimmy SomervilleTo Love SomebodyNo but I had that 84-90 Best Of with it on
7808 StateCubik / OlympicNope
8The Righteous BrothersUnchained MelodyIt’s a no
9Bruno Brookes and Liz KershawLet’s DanceCharity single or not, this was simply appalling. NO!

Disclaimer

OK – here’s the thing – the TOTP episodes are only available on iPlayer for a limited amount of time so the link to the programme below only works for about another month so you’ll have to work fast if you want to catch the whole show.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000tpzk/top-of-the-pops-22111990

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

Some bedtime reading?

IMG_0001

TOTP 08 NOV 1990

This schedule of reviewing two retro TOTP shows a week is killing me! Plus my Mac is now so old that it can’t cope with any software updates which means the formatting of my posts has gone to pot recently so apologies for that. Enough of my IT issues though. Just a reminder of what is going on here. I, a 52 year old middle aged man, have been reviewing these BBC4 TOTP repeats for over four years now. Having started in 1983 we are now into 1990 and with it being November, the release schedules are starting to get busy with the all important Xmas market on the horizon. As such there are six new singles on the show tonight but we start with a second studio performance for a song that surely didn’t warrant a repeat.

Despite being voted the Best Male Solo SInger in the Smash Hits Readers Poll of 1990 for the second year running (he was also voted the worst Male Solo Singer) and having a string of hit singles to his name this calendar year, all was not well in Jason Donovan world. The hits were getting smaller and the teeny bopper fans had new idols to worship in the form of New Kids On The Block (Donovan trailed in third behind two of them in the Most Fanciable Male category). His latest single “I’m Doing Fine” was doing nothing of the sort and had not even yet made it into the Top 20. A second TOTP outing was called for and so here he was opening the show in a determined effort to re-establish himself in the upper echelons of the charts. 

If you compare and contrast this SAW produced ‘song’ with the glorious “Step Back In Time” that we saw on last week’s show from Kylie Minogue… well, it’s like comparing Boris Johnson with the New Zealand PM Jacinda Ardern; one’s a fine example of statecraft the other is…well…just a state. And talking of states, what the Hell is Jason wearing here?! It appears to be a suit over the top of a gold lamé tracksuit top and the only person I can think of who used to wear such a garment was that now unmentionable name from Radio 1’s past and the host of that show about fixing things for people (no, not Repair Shop – you know who I’m talking about!). 

This TOTP performance did nothing to alleviate Jason’s chart fortunes (literally nothing as it went down from No 22 to No 29 the following week). In 1991, the classic (but desperate) record company trick of releasing a Best Of album saw his profile at least maintained and brought him a couple of Top 20 hits (one a cover version obviously) but his true resurrection came from left field when he scored a No 1 with “Any Dream WIll Do” from Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

Another song at its chart peak next. Paul Simon‘s “The Obvious Child” was very well received critically (as was parent album “The Rhythm Of The Saints”) but what was it actually about? Well, according to one review in Rolling Stone magazine, the lyrics referred to the process of growing old and the fact that ‘days have become defined by their limitations and dogged ordinariness’. Wow! That could just as easily be describing living through the COVID pandemic. 

Apparently the song is also the namesake of a film which I never knew until now. Obvious Child is a 2014 American rom-com about a drunken one night stand which leads to the lead character (played by Jenny Slate) deciding to have an abortion. I’ve never seen it but it gets rave reviews with Slate receiving numerous awards for her performance. A bit like Paul Simon then. 

“The Obvious Child” peaked at No 15 and it would be another 16 years before Simon had another UK Top 40 single. 

What the f**k?! A single that includes the line ‘What the f**k?’ in its lyrics and yet seems to have gone unnoticed for three decades and never been censored nor banned?! Unbelievable! OK, I’ve overplayed the puns a bit there but it is quite extraordinary. You could say the same about the whole EMF story though. Hailing from the Forest Of Dean in Gloucestershire, this lot appeared almost fully formed with an irresistible song and stardom seemed theirs for the taking. 

I think I first became aware of them when they appeared on the Smash Hits Poll Winners Party 1990 show which my research tells me took place on the 11th November (so presumably I hadn’t watched this TOTP from three days earlier). I recall saying to my wife as we watched it in our flat that we had just moved into “who the Hell are EMF?”. To be fair to me, what were they doing on a show about the chart stars of the year winning awards when they had only just released their debut single? I would find out soon enough. Their song “Unbelievable” blew me away. It was the right sound at just the right time; they were perfect for late 1990 – right on the money. Coming over like the younger, cheekier siblings of Jesus Jones, they rode the rock-dance crossover zeitgeist flawlessly and were rewarded with a huge hit. “Unbelievable” was a No 3 hit in the UK and a No 1 in the US. 

Apparently the “oh” and “It’s unbelievable” samples were taken from controversial (and pretty offensive) US comedian Andrew Dice Clay which I never knew until now. I do recall though that there was a big fuss about what the initials EMF actually stood for. The official line was ‘Epsom Mad Funkers’, a name taken from a New Order fan club although rumours persisted that it referred to ‘ecstasy mother f**ker’ as that phrase featured in a hidden song simply called “EMF” on the band’s debut album “Schubert Dip”. 

Despite a string of singles after “Unbelievable” that all made the Top 40, their chart peaks were in decline and after three albums they eventually split. Multiple reunions have taken place since but the band’s history also included tragedy – Zac Foley, the band’s bass guitarist, died in 2002 aged just 31 due to an overdose of non-prescribed drugs. 

One of my abiding memories of EMF and “Unbelievable” comes from a long forgotten TV show called Tom Jones: The Right Time which chronicled the history of pop music and how it had been influenced and shaped. The first episode included this performance with EMF and audience members getting on stage to literally hang off Tom’s Neck. 

Whilst not a super fan (although I do have their Best Of CD), I would be able to name quite a few Del Amitri songs including “Spit In The Rain” but I had no idea it had actually made it into the Top 40. As far as I can tell, this was a non-album single* released in between the “Waking Hours” and “Change Everything” LPs and actually made No 21 in the charts. In my head, everything the band released between “Nothing Ever Happens” in 1990 and “Always The Last To Know” in 1992 missed the Top 40 but clearly not. It’s fairly typical Del Amitri fare but that’s fine by me with the ‘spit in the rain’ simile a clever lyrical tool. 

The band are due to release a new album later in 2021 entitled “Fatal Mistakes” which again could be a reference to the COVID 19 panademic.

*It did eventually appear on a two -disc reissue of “Waking Hours” in 2014 

The Top 5 albums feature is still with us so for all the completists out there, these were the best selling albums in the UK for October 1990

  1. Paul Simon – “Rhythm Of The Saints”
  2. The Three Tenors – “In Concert”
  3. Status Quo – “Rocking All Over The Years”
  4. George Michael – “Listen Without Prejudice Vol 1”
  5. The Charlatans  – “Some Friendly”

Some pretty mainstream names in there although The Charlatans creeping in at No 5 to remind us that this was 1990 after all. ‘Madchester’ and all that.

Definitely not part of ‘Madchester’ were Liverpool’s The La’s and if EMF’s story was extraordinary, even that had nothing on this lot. The legend of Lee Mavers remains a mystery up there with Richie Edwards of the Manics. Often referred to as a scouse Brian Wilson, his refusal to dance to the music industry’s tune and reputation for studio perfection means he has become a mythical figure with just that one, solitary La’s album to show for his talent. 

I think I’d first heard “There She Goes” when working in the toy department of Debenhams at Xmas in 1989 – a colleague had played it to me (it was originally released in November of 1988) and so immediately familiar did it sound that it felt impossible that it hadn’t been in existence for years and years. A timeless melody indeed. The 1990 re-release here was remixed by Steve Lillywhite and this time, resistance was futile. If The Stone Roses could be treated as the new gods of popular music then surely The La’s were also assured a place in musical heaven? For all the plaudits that their album received, I was amazed to discover that it only made No 30  on the chart. It got played to death in the Manchester Our Price I was working in at the time. Sadly, there was to never be a follow up. Bassist John Power got fed up of the inertia and left at the end of 1991 to form the super successful Cast (who Mavers has expressed his extreme dislike for) whilst The La’s went into hiatus for 14 years before a brief reunion in 2005 that resulted in some live shows but no new music. 

I saw The La’s twice live; once supporting Fine Young Cannibals when I confidently told my wife that their band name was pronounced The L.A.s (as in LA, California) and once with a friend called Jane who was a fan – that gig was cut short when one of the band possibly Mavers, possibly Peter “Cammy” Cammell  (the John Bishop lookalike in this performance I think) stormed off stage never to return, a bit like the hope of any new La’s material. 

Just like “The Obvious Child” being name checked in a film, BBC comedy-drama TV series There She Goes was named after the song by The La’s.  

To quote EMF, What the f**k?! A single by Gazza?! Yep, despite Italia ’90 having come to its sad conclusion (for England fans) four months prior, we still couldn’t get enough of Mr Gascoigne (supposedly). “Fog On The Tyne” was re-written by Lindisfarne just for the man himself and released as “Fog On The Tyne (Revisited)”. Well, if Timmy Mallett could be a pop star, why not Gazza? Surely he was more popular than that berk? Well, not quite it seemed as Gazza’s debut waxing peaked at No 2 whilst Mallett scored a No 1 as Bombalurina. Still, No 2 was pretty impressive to say that the record was a load of shite.

Was he inspired by his Spurs and England team mate Chris Waddle whose “Diamond Lights” as part of Glenn & Chris had been a hit three years before? Or was it his involvement in New Order’s “World In Motion” England song from the World Cup that made him think he could be a pop star? Well, according to an interview in Smash Hits, when asked ‘why did you decide to embark on a career as a pop star?’ Gazza replied:

“Somebody asked us if I wanted to do a record and I said I would do it”

There you go then. Simples. 

To my mind, Gascoigne’s well documented problems seem to have been exasperated by being surrounded by a lot of people trying to catch a ride on his fame. That Smash Hits article commented that the video shoot was ‘packed with Gazza’s family and Gazza’s mates and Gazza’s mates’ mates and Gazza’s mates’ mates’ second cousins’. Says it all really. Bet Jimmy Five Bellies was there. 

Not content with one single, Gazza released a follow up and an album (!) called “Let’s Have A Party” (of course it was) which included four Jive Bunny style medleys – a disco one, a Motown one, an Elvis one (Gazza’s favourite) and a Gilbert O’Sullivan one (yes, a Gilbert O’Sullivan one). Even allowing for the madness of the aforementioned Jive Bunny phenomenon, surely nobody bought Gazza’s album? Surely? 

A massive seller over this Xmas period was “The Singles Collection 1984/1990” by Jimmy Somerville covering his solo, Bronski Beat and The Communards career. To promote the album, Jimmy did a cover of The Bee Gees hit “To Love Somebody” which actually suited his voice I thought. Well, I suppose you could join the dots between the Jimmy’s falsetto voice and Barry Gibb’s (who wrote the song) quite easily. I like the way in which Jimmy never seemed to dress up for his TOTP appearances. Check him out here in his plain grey T-shirt and jeans. Quite the contrast to Jason Donovan’s attire at the top of the show. If you’ve got the pipes, that’s all that is really required, eh Jase? 

“To Love Somebody” peaked at No 8. 

The Righteous Brothers remain in pole position with “Unchained Melody” which, in 1999, the American Society of Composers, Authors, and Publishers called one of the 25 most-performed songs and musical works of the entire 20th century! It’s been covered by everyone from Elvis to Bing Crosby to LeAnn Rimes to U2…no really….see?

It’s the Righteous Brothers version that is the definitive take though surely? So pervasive is the song’s influence that Ghost (the film that generated its re-release) was originally going to be called Unchained Melody. 

Inevitably, Family Guy has its own take on Ghost and “Unchained Melody”:

The play out video is the new one from 808 State. Double A-side “Cubik / Olympic” would peak at No 10. The “Olympic” track was recorded in support of Manchester’s 1996 Olympic bid. That bid would be unsuccessful with Atlanta getting the nod but Manchester would try again for the 2000 Olympics and I was was working in Our Price in Stockport the day that decision was announced. There was an event down at the Castlefield area in Manchester city centre with thousands of people congregating to hopefully celebrate the good news. The trams were packed ferrying party goers to the venue. Sadly, the Manchester faithful were disappointed again as Sydney was announced as the host city. That great city that was our home for the best part of the 90s would ultimately get its time in the sun when it hosted the 2002 Commonwealth Games – two years after we left Manchester. 

For posterity’s sake, I include the chart run down below: 

Order of appearance

Artist

Song

Did I Buy it?

1

Jason Donovan

I’m Doing Fine

No of course not

2

Paul Simon

Obvious Child

No but it was on that first Q Magazine album that I bought.

3

EMF

Unbelievable

Unbelievably not at the time but I did buy a later single of theirs called Afro King, the CD of which was like a mini greatest hits which had it on

4

Del Amitri

Spit In The Rain

No but its on my greatest hits CD of theirs

5

The La’s

There She Goes

Not the single but I have their album

6

Gazza and Lindisfarne

Fog On The Tyne – Revisited

NO!

7

Jimmy Somerville

To Love Somebody

No but I had that 84-90 Best Of with it on

8

The Righteous Brothers

Unchained Melody

It’s a no

9

808 State

Cubik / Olympic

Nope

Disclaimer

OK – here’s the thing – the TOTP episodes are only available on iPlayer for a limited amount of time so the link to the programme below only works for about another month so you’ll have to work fast if you want to catch the whole show.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000th92/top-of-the-pops-08111990

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

Some bedtime reading?

 

Page 1 - Smash Hits - Issue 311 - 31st October - 13th November 1990

TOTP 04 OCT 1990

We’re really out of sync with these BBC4 TOTP repeats. In the real world in 2021 we are entering Spring whilst in TOTP Rewind land we are are well into the Autumn of 1990. Like a busted clock, even allowing for the two repeats a week schedule, there’s usually a couple of times in a calendar year when TOTP of yesteryear and real time are in harmony but the delay between the end of the 1989 shows and the beginning of the 1990 broadcasts has thrown everything out. Oh well – in a world of lockdown, time seems to have shifted from its axis anyway and no longer seems to function as it once did. The days are so much longer and the lack of anything to do means they all blur into each other anyway. When I was working in record shops in the 90s, I’m sure Mr Our Price used to mess with the space-time continuum so slowly did some of the afternoons pass.

The first act on this week’s TOTP ought to know something about the workings of time given their name – Twenty 4 Seven featuring Captain Hollywood. OK, the Captain Hollywood bit doesn’t add anything to the theme but you can see where I was going. This lot seemed to be a prototype 2 Unlimited with their template of a male rapper and female singer (plus both acts were Dutch) and yet, unlike the latter who terrorised the charts for a good few years in the early to mid 90s, they never seemed able to capitalise on the success of “I Can’t Stand It” in the UK. There was a follow up single that made the Top 20 but after that, time stood still for them.

In the rest of Europe however, it was a completely different story where they remained popular and successful despite the departure of the Captain himself in 1991. By the way, Hollywood’s real name is Tony Dawson-Harrison and after leaving the band, he went a bit off the rails…

Talking of time as we were…it’s HAMMER TIME! Yes, MC Hammer is back and for the second time this year, there is a cover of a song originally recorded by the Chi-Lites in the UK Top 40. Back in July, Paul Young released his version of their “Oh Girl” track and now MC Hammer has followed suit by covering “Have You Seen Her”. As a follow up to “U Can’t Touch This”, it was quite a departure bpm wise. With it being a Hammer production though, he changes the lyrics significantly with pretty much the only one kept the same being the ‘Have you seen her, tell me have you seen her’ chorus. I’m not sure that all of the rewritten words have aged that well. Check these out:

Hammer, you know I’m looking
Calling all my friends all around the place
Guy, Levert, or my homey Rob Base

If you’ve peeped her out, tell me
Yo, veo on the phone
Ted, Dre, or Ed Lover
Fab Five, homeys won’t you help a young brother

Peeped her out?! Plus he refers to himself in the third person at least twice – a clear sing that success had gone to his head by this point. Apparently Hammer would inflict fines for breaches of discipline by any of his touring party for such crimes as making mistakes on stage! Lost. In. Showbiz. “Have You Seen Her” didn’t quite match the heights of “U Can’t Touch This” but was a solid follow up, peaking inside the Top 10 at No 8. The third single released from the album, “Pray”, would further consolidate his success by duplicating that chart position. We’re not done with Hammer time just yet!

One of the most consistently, commercially successful bands of the 80s next who, despite by their own acknowledgement had realised by this point that their imperial phase was over, nevertheless continued to produce work of substance into the new decade. “So Hard” was the lead single from the first Pet Shop Boys album in nigh on two years. When it was released later in the month, “Behaviour” would go to No 2 but would sell substantially less copies than their “Actually” and “Introspective” albums. However, despite my persistent blogging about a TV show format that insisted the opposite and made a competition out of music, creativity cannot be measured by units shifted and chart positions alone. “Behaviour” is now very much seen as a maturing of their writing and routinely named as one of their finest works by their fan base. A melancholy classic dealing with the weighty subjects of friendship, loss and, in the case of the track “Being Boring”, speaking to and for the LGBT community of the heartbreak and tragedy of AIDS.

Coming back to “So Hard”, apparently it was the first track finished for “Behaviour” but Chris Lowe has subsequently acknowledged that it could and possibly should have been left off the album so incongruous was it to the rest of the songs it contained. Even if you only know the singles taken from the album like the aforementioned “Being Boring” and “Jealousy”, it’s easy to see what Chris was getting at. Not that it isn’t a good song, I think it stands up well and I initially preferred it to the subsequent single releases but over time I have come to appreciate more the power of the song writing on those other tracks.

I once got into a Twitter row with the Absolute 80s radio station about “So Hard”. How so? Well, it was all to do with the subject of time again, or more specifically the delineation of it. What am I going on about? Well, it’s simple really. Absolute 80s played “So Hard”, a song released 10 months into the 90s. It offended my sense of musical eras. Here’s the spat in full:

Yes, I am a complete pedant. “So Hard” peaked at No 4 in the UK Top 40.

Oh come on! Who in the whole wide world needed a Technotronic “Megamix”?! This was weapons grade shithousery by the act’s record label as they basically had their first four singles (that had already been hits) mixed together and shoved that out into the market to get people to buy them all over again. Thankfully, this act of gross manipulation turned out to be the tipping point and record buyers rejected their poisonous product after this. They would achieve just one more Top 20 hit in the UK. In early 1991, fellow Eurodance snake oil salesmen Snap! would pull the exact same shit when they released a single called “Mega Mix” which was a remix of their first four singles and just like Technotronic’s effort, it also went Top 10. Would we ever learn?

The TOTP producers are still persisting with this best selling albums of the previous month nonsense. For the record, the best selling albums of Sep 1990 were:

1. Three Tenors – In Concert

2. George Michael – “Listen Without Prejudice Vol 1”

3. Elton John – “Sleeping With The Past”

4. Michael Bolton – “Soul Provider”

5. Deacon Blue – “Ooh Las Vegas”

A couple of noteworthy things here. Firstly, the weird, DIY looking clip to reflect the George Michael album. What the Hell was that?! Well, George had refused to shoot a video for the album’s lead single “Praying For Time” due to tensions with his record company Sony and seeing as there wasn’t yet another single taken from it, seemingly somebody (Sony? TOTP?) put together some stills against a back drop of the “Waiting For That Day” track. It looks odd to say the least.

Secondly, that Deacon Blue album was a compilation of B-sides and unreleased tracks so the fact that it was such a big seller says much for their popularity at that time. I’ve got “Ooh Las Vegas” and there are some great songs on there and no I don’t care what you think of that statement.

Back in the studio we find MC Tunes and 808 State with “Tunes Splits The Atom”. This was the second consecutive hit for Tunes after “The Only Rhyme That Bites” earlier in the year and while it’s crammed with his rap lyrics like its predecessor, it has a more mellow vibe to it. This was the last single to be officially credited to ‘MC Tunes versus 808 State’ – “Primary Rhyming”, the next single lifted from his debut album “The North At Its Heights”, had that wording removed from its cover credits. That act seemed to break the spell as it peaked at No 67 and MC Tunes never graced the charts again. There was no chain reaction of subsequent hits after this one (ho ho).

He made the most of his time in the spotlight though including being the guest singles reviewer for Smash Hits around this time. He chose “So Hard” by Pet Shop Boys as his single of the fortnight but he hated MC Hammer’s “Have You Seen Her” describing it thus:

This is the sort of tune that gets played in nightclubs called ‘Mr Smiths’ wear people go wearing their nice suits, drink brown ale and chat up women. Crap.”

Quite. Smash Hits subsequently ran a competition to win the very copy of the MC Hammer single that MC Tunes damaged! “Tunes Splits The Atom” peaked at No 18.

Some Breakers now…what? Four of them?! Oh great. Lots more typing to do yet then. We start with the Adventures of Stevie V who I had no idea managed two chart hits! “Body Language” was that second hit but was nowhere near as successful as his No 2 hit “Dirty Cash” peaking at No 29. The reason why? It was a load of old cobblers! Give me The Adventures of Tin Tin over Stevie V anytime. Hell, I’d even settle for some Thompson Twins (see what I did there?).

The unusual event next of a Breaker tune becoming a No 1 record. Despite the TOTP hosts usual claims that this section featured the most ‘happening’ records on the charts, they rarely were and the whole premise of the feature was presumably just a ploy to be able to cram in a load more tunes on the show. “A Little Time” by The Beautiful South was a welcome exception. Whilst not my favourite song of theirs by quite some distance, compared to the likes of The Adventures Of Stevie V, it was chart nectar. Entering the charts at a lowly No 30, it progressed steadily to the Top 10 the following week, then the Top 5 and finally No 1 for a solitary week.

Yet another bittersweet tune from the pens of Paul Heaton and David Rotheray, the use of a male and female vocalist in Dave Hemmingway and Briana Corrigan helped to emphasise the opposing sides of the lyrics with the sting in the tale that while ‘Dave’ had been off enjoying himself before committing himself to the relationship, by the time he had decided, ‘Briana’ had pulled the plug on it and wanted nothing to do with him. The memorable video full of flour, feathers, kitchen knives and a decapitated teddy bear with its head on a spike won the 1991 Brit Awards for British Video of the Year.

“Red Hot + Blue” was a compilation album from the Red Hot Organization, a not-for-profit international body dedicated to fighting AIDS through pop culture and featured interpretations of Cole Porter songs by contemporary pop artists. It was a fairly eclectic roster of artists who contributed from Tom Waits to U2 and from Salif Keita to k.d. lang. It sold over a million copies worldwide and there was an accompanying TV special featuring specially created videos for the songs, alongside clips highlighting the effects of AIDS.

I remember the album used to get a regular airing in the Our Price store I was working in by the end of the year and my favourite track from it was David Byrne’s treatment of “Don’t Fence Me In” closely followed by Debbie Harry and Iggy Pop’s cover of “Well, Did You Evah!”. However, the official single released from the album was Neneh Cherry ‘s take on “I’ve Got You Under My Skin” which, whilst very important in terms of helping to promote AIDS awareness, I didn’t like that much at all musically. Looking back ,and given the subject matter of “Being Boring”, I’m surprised that Pet Shop Boys weren’t contributors to the project whereas the aforementioned Thompson Twins were. Not that I know anything about how such projects are put together of course. “I’ve Got You Under My Skin” peaked at No 25.

As with the first of this week’s Breakers The Adventures of Stevie V, I had no idea this lot had a second hit but they did. “Heaven” was the re-released follow up to The Chimes‘ cover version of U2’s “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”. It was a No 1 song on the US Billboard Hot Dance Club Play chart but struggled to a high of No 24 in the UK Top 40. Listening to it now, I can appreciate Pauline Henry’s vocal prowess but the song doesn’t do anything much for me at all I’m afraid.

Who on earth was Bobby Vinton and what was he doing in the charts? Well, you only had to hear “Blue Velvet” once to realise that he was a singing star from back in the day but apart from that I knew very little. Oh hang on, was he the guy that sang “Dream Lover” and “Mack The Knife”? No, that was Bobby Darin. Oh. Well, Wikipedia tells me that Vinton was a US singer-songwriter who, get this, released 38 studio albums, 67 compilation albums and 88 singles over the course of the 60s, 70s and 80s. However, he’d only ever had two minor Top 40 hits in the UK back in the early 60s.

So why was he riding high in our charts in the 90s? I don’t really have to spell it out do I? No, it was nothing to do with the David Lynch’s 1986 film Blue Velvet (although the song does feature in it as sung by its star Isabella Rossellini). OK, it seems I do have to spell it out. It was used in an advert. Of course it was! Everything in the charts in this year seemed to have been in a bloody advert. Here’s @TOTPFacts with the details:

Nowadays of course, Nivea have turned from blue to red and got Liverpool FC footballers to advertise their products. Thankfully, this hasn’t led to a re-release of the “Anfield Rap” yet. “Blue Velvet” would rise all the way to No 2.

Maria McKee is still at No 1 with “Show Me Heaven” but instead of that live vocal studio performance that they’ve been showing, we get the official promo video this week. As it’s from the Days Of Thunder film, it’s not long before we see Tom Cruise’s fizzog (mostly kissing co-star and later wife Nicole Kidman) although to be fair, Maria does get plenty of screen time too.

I’ve never seen Days Of Thunder but I’m imagining it’s like Top Gun but with racing cars instead of jets. Hang on, it says in Wikipedia that Cruise’s character was called Cole Trickle? Cole Trickle? Wait! It gets better (or worse). The character’s name was a reference to real life American race car driver Dick Trickle! That’s DICK TRICKLE!! Once more…DICK TRICKLE!! That’s up there with Biggus Dickus…

Just in case you hadn’t had enough Technotonic in the last 30 minutes, here they were again as the play out video but under their pseudonym of Hi Tek 3 along with Ya Kid K with “Spin That Wheel (Turtles Get Real)”. Like Partners In Kryme before them, this was from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles soundtrack and was actually a re-release having made No 69 back in January but was propelled to No 15 this time around on the back of the fuss/success surrounding those infernal turtles.

Ya Kid K always makes me think of “Our Kid Eh” by Mark and Lard’s spoof group The Shirehorses which of course lampoons Radiohead’s “Kid A” and features songs such as “Why Is It Always Dairy Lea” (a take off of “Why Does It Always Rain On Me?” by Travis) and “Feel Like Shite” (their take on “Alright” by Supergrass). Lovely stuff.

Order of appearanceArtistSongDid I Buy it?
1Twenty 4 Seven featuring Captain HollywoodI Can’t Stand It…and therefore I didn’t buy it
2MC HammerHave You Seen HerNope
3Pet Shop BoysSo HardNo but it’s on my Pop Art retrospective of theirs
4TechnotronicMegamixAs if
5MC Tunes / 808 StateTunes Splits The AtomNo
6The Adventures Of Stevie VBody LanguageNegative
7The Beautiful SouthA Little TimeNot the single but I have it on their Best Of album
8Neneh CherryI’ve Got You Under My SkinIt’s a no
9The ChimesHeavenAnd another one
10Bobby VintonBlue VelvetNot for me thanks
11Maria McKeeShow Me HeavenNah
12Hi Tek 3 featuring Ya Kid KSpin That Wheel (Turtles Get Real)Hell no

Disclaimer

OK – here’s the thing – the TOTP episodes are only available on iPlayer for a limited amount of time so the link to the programme below only works for about another month so you’ll have to work fast if you want to catch the whole show.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000t132/top-of-the-pops-04101990

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

Some bedtime reading?

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TOTP 05 JUL 1990

It is Thursday the 5th of July 1990 and it is less than 24 hours since the England international football team bowed out of Italia ’90 in the cruelest of circumstances. Just four days earlier, a 3-2 quarter final win over unexpectedly tricky opponents in Cameroon had unleashed emotions and hopes not witnessed since 1966 (and all that). But football is a cruel business – just this week my beloved Chelsea have sacked our greatest ever player – and by the time of the usual TOTP broadcast on the following Thursday, England were out, denied at the last by a penalty shoot-out defeat to West Germany. It hurt, so close but yet so far. Buoyed by the feel good factor that the team’s progress (if nor performances ) had instilled, we allowed ourselves to believe we were back and there would be many more tilts at the big prize to come. Little could we have imagined that it would be another 28 years and 7 tournaments before we would get to the World Cup semi final again.

Two days after this TOTP, England would lose again in the pointless third place play off match to hosts Italy whilst the final itself a day later was one of the worst games of football I have ever had to endure. After Gazza’s tears in the semi-final, we had Maradona’s as his Argentina team, who barely deserved to be there, lost a bad tempered match 1-0. The England team were hailed as heroes on their return (despite Gazza’s ‘hilarious’ fake breasts outfit) and a country’s appetite for football was rekindled after the dark days of the mid to late 80s.

Just in case you haven’t seen this enough times in the intervening 30 years…and who the hell is ‘Christopher’ Waddle?

Enough of the football though, this is supposed to be a music blog isn’t it? Yes, you’re right – it is. Let’s get to it then and tonight’s host is the ever snarky Nicky Campbell and the first act on tonight are Inspiral Carpets with “She Comes In The Fall”. This was their follow up to breakthrough hit “This Is How It Feels” and for me, it wasn’t anywhere near as captivating as its predecessor. I mean, compared to some of the utter dross inhabiting the Top 40 at the time it was like musical ambrosia but it seemed a bit…I don’t know….conventional? No, not conventional… erm…unexceptional? I think maybe they peaked too early with “This Is How It Feels” for me. “She Comes In The Fall” has all the right ingredients – Clint Boon’s swirling organ sound, driving back beat and Tom Hingley’s no frills vocal stylings but it just didn’t grab me in the same way.

Talking of Clint Boon, I saw him live a couple of years ago when I caught the Happy Mondays play at Hull. It was an open air gig and the support were Peter Hook and The Light so a very Manc based line up. Boon, with his DJ hat on, provided the tunes in between acts and it seemed like money for old rope to me as he rolled out the most obvious of Manchester tunes. It was almost like a musical version buzz word bingo. Still, the crowd seemed to lap it up. Having said that, they were mainly middle aged men reliving their hedonistic youth by being of their tits on coke so they weren’t the most demanding of audiences.

“She Comes In The Fall” peaked at No 27.

What? Another Janet Jackson single? As with a lot of Ms Jackson’s output, it’s also another single I don’t recall at all. “Alright” was one of seven singles lifted from her “Janet Jackson’s Rhythm Nation 1814” album and although the video shown here won a Soul Train Music Award for Best Music Video, I don’t remember that either. It starts off looking like Bugsy Malone before the inevitable big production dance routines kick in. The plot, for what its worth, resolves with it all having been a dream which is fitting as “Alright” is one big snooze*. It peaked at No 20 over here and No 4 in the US.

*Yes, I know the video was the inspiration behind Bill Bailey’s “Rapper’s Delight” routine on Strictly last year. I wasn’t arsed about that either.

Seven of the eleven songs on tonight’s show have already been seen before and here’s a run of three on the trot beginning with Poison and “Unskinny Bop”. Supposedly the title doesn’t refer to anything at all and was just a guide vocal that fitted phonetically into the song’s structure but having read the lyrics back, it’s pretty clear that it was all about having ‘A bit of How’s Your Father’. Check out these lyrics:

Like gasoline you wanna pump me, And leave me when you get your fill yeah

Still need convincing? How about these then:

You’re sayin’ my love won’t do ya
But that ain’t love written on your face
Well, honey I can see right through ya
Yeah, who ridin’ who at the end of the race?

I don’t think you need to be a cunning linguist to understand what was being sung about.

“Unskinny Bop” peaked at No 15.

As he introduces the next act who are Double Trouble with “Love Don’t Live Here Anymore”, Nicky Campbell appears spooked by the studio audience member stood next to him. To be fair to him, her look does require a double take. She looks like she’s turned up for the Halloween show about four months too early. Dressed head to toe in black and white with a massive floppy hat and two tone hair, she’s not your regular TOTP attendee. Judging by her outfit, I din’t think Double Trouble would have been her musical act of choice. In all honesty, they’re not mine either. Their shiny R’n’B cover version of the old Rose Royce classic is functional at best.

After name checking Madonna and Jimmy Nails’s versions of the song in last week’s post, it got me thinking about just how many times it had been covered. It’s loads. The recently spied Yazz did a version for her 1997 album “The Natural Life” then there’s Seal who recorded it for his second album of Soul covers (“Soul 2”) in 2011. Of course , there are also the usual easy listening treatments of it by the likes of Michael Ball and Bill Tarmey (aka Jack Duckworth) but I think the one that really caught my eye was by “Pompeii” hit makers Bastille. Let’s have a listen then…

Hmm…I’ll stick with Jimmy Nail thanks. Double Trouble’s 1990 version peaked at No 21.

A third outing for Nicky Lockett now otherwise known as MC Tunes and his mates 808 State with “The Only Rhyme That Bites”. Fair play to the TOTP producer Paul Ciani I guess for really promoting an out and out rap sound so heavily. However, we only get 1 min and 20 seconds of the track which was again due to Mr Ciani who, in an attempt to shoehorn in more songs into the show’s half hour slot, restricted the duration of studio performances to three minutes and videos to two minutes. Not sure what MC Tunes, who looked like he could handle himself, would have made of his massively edited screen time.

“The Only Rhyme That Bites” would get no higher than its No 10 peak here.

I’m guessing that Paul Ciani was also responsible for this new segment of the show – the Best selling albums of the month. Why the new format? TOTP had always been based around the template of the Top 40 singles chart. This new feature seemed incongruous to say the least. And where was the sales info coming from? Gallup presumably. I have to admit to not recalling this bit of the show’s history so I have no idea how long it lasted. No doubt future TOTP repeats will have the answer. For the record, the Top 5 albums for June 1990 were:

1. Luciano Pavarotti – The Essential Pavarotti

2. Soull II Soul – Volume II 1990: A New Decade

3. Jason Donovan – Between The Lines

4. Talk Talk – The Very Best Of Talk Talk

5. New Kids On The Block – “Step By Step”

Back to that Top 40 singles chart though and we find an unusual new entry at No 12 in F.A.B. featuring MC Parker and “Thunderbirds Are Go”. Yes, after MC Tunes we got MC Parker, that bloke that drove Lady Penelope around in Gerry Anderson’s wonderful puppet adventures series Thunderbirds. I loved the Gerry Anderson creations when I was a small boy (Captain Scarlet And The Mysterons was my favourite) and, in retrospect, I’m not sure that he gets the credit that he deserved for what he achieved. I’m also not sure that this mash up of theme tunes from his shows given a then contemporary house dance sheen was a suitable tribute either.

The single was part of a bigger project that culminated in the “Power Themes 90” album that contained 12 tracks based around British TV show theme tunes – six were Anderson vehicles with the others made up from the likes of The Prisoner, The Saint and The Avengers. I remember the album from my first few weeks in employment at Our Price later in the year but apart from the Thunderbirds single I’m not sure I heard any of the rest of the tracks. I wonder what the Captain Scarlet one was like….

…well, that was horrible! Bloody Hell! OK, back to MC Parker and according to my Supermarionation book (yes I am that sad), Parker’s character was initially conceived as a simple dramatic support to Lady Penelope but his comedy value meant that he was often the star of the show. His incorrect use of the letter ‘h’ which would preface all vowels became his trademark. As such, I guess it made sense to promote the “Thunderbirds Are Go” single around him.

Two years after this single, The Thunderbirds TV series was rebroadcast on BBC and picked up a whole new generation of fans leading to a relaunch of a range of Thunderbirds branded toys, the biggest seller of which was the model for Tracy Island. So hard to get was the item that Blue Peter famously showed desperate parents how to make their own version out of cereal packets, pipe cleaners and washing up liquid bottles etc as demonstrated by one time TOTP presenter Anthea Turner:

In hindsight, was “Thunderbirds Are Go” a novelty record? I’m saying yes but then, we’d already had a dance record featuring samples of dialogue from Thunderbirds two years earlier when “Beat Dis” by Bomb The Bass was a huge hit and I don’t recall anyone saying that was a novelty record. Fine margins and all that.

“From plastic puppets to Australian soap operas” says Campbell as he gleefully puts the boot into the next act who are Craig McLachlan And Check 1-2 with “Mona”. Craig won’t care though as he is up to No 4 in the charts and if anyone is getting a kick in the knackers it’s his ex Neighbours co-star Jason Donovan whose chart career is showing definite signs of starting to peter out. When asked about how he felt about having a bigger hit than Donovan in Smash Hits magazine, McLachlan replied:

Ah look we’re over the moon. It’s fantastic…The music’s pretty Australian and we didn’t know how it would go down over there in a fairly techno chart. Our music is back to cranking the amp up and sweating a lot…

Cranking and sweating? He sounds like my 11 year old when he’s playing Fortnite. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, being ‘sweaty’ in Fortnite means you’re a top player and ‘cranking’ refers to ‘cranking 90s’ which is a technique of building that is considered the fastest way to get high ground on a player. I feel so old.

Back to Craig though and although his music career fell away after the success of “Mona”, he remained inextricably (and some might say bizarrely) linked to Jason Donovan as they both played the role of Dr Frank-N-Furter in Rocky Horror Picture Show and also Caractacus Pott in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (I saw Donovan in the latter show – his performance was limited to say the least).

What was it with the 1990 and soul dance re-workings of classic old tunes? After Double Trouble’s version of the Rose Royce song “Love Don’t Live Here Anymore” earlier in this very show, we get some act called Massivo featuring Tracy and their interpretation of the Minnie Riperton hit “Loving You”. The other week we had Maureen doing Sister Sledge’s “Thinking Of You” and earlier in the year we had The Chimes giving an R ‘n’ B rendition of U2’s “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” – now this. I’m not sure I recall this at all. Who was Tracy? Well she was nothing to do with the Tracys from Thunderbirds nor was she Tracy Tracy from The Primitives (despite her peroxide blonde hair). Who was she then?

Here’s @TOTPFacts with the answer:

OK – still none the wiser to be honest. What? There’s more?

So a bit like Betty Boo in that respect then. Watching this back, Tracy doesn’t quite nail the famous descending F sharp note for me – bit screechy (like I could do it).

Massivo peaked at No 25 but the seemingly endless conveyor belt of this type of thing (what was this genre called?) carried on into the 90s with Quartz featuring Dina Carroll (yes that one) giving us a danced up version of Carole King’s “It’s Too Late” in 1991 and The Fugees adding some beats to Roberta Flacks’ “Killing Me Softly” in 1996.

Stop! Hammer time! Shouldn’t that be MC Hammer time though? It’s the third ‘MC’ of the show and I’m sure at some point MC Hammer did actually drop the MC bit from his stage name (was it when he released “Too Legit* To Quit” in 1991?). Anyway, for now he’s got the MC prefix and he’s tearing up the charts with “U Can’t Touch This”. The single was taken from his Diamond (not platinum but diamond) selling US album “Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em”. I’m glad I took notice of the title at the time as a few months later when I went for an interview for a sales assistant position with Our Price, one of the questions on the music quiz applicants had to take was ‘What is the name of MC Hammer’s current album?’. Boom! Back of the net!

Given that his commercial peak lasted only from 1990-92, Hammer’s name does still seem to resonate all these years later. Was it all about the trousers or did he actually have some good tunes in there as well? One thing is for sure, he never got so big that if you google the word hammer the first results that come up are not this:

* ‘Legit’ is another word that my 11 year old uses on a regular basis. I’m not sure what he would make of Hammer’s oversized pants though. On that theme, I once showed a younger colleague at work a video of the Bay City Rollers and she could not get her head round their tartan trousers troosers.

England’s World Cup may be over but Elton John‘s reign at the top of the charts carries on. What was it about this song that the nation couldn’t get enough of? Truly baffling. Well, here’s the aforementioned MC Tunes giving his verdict from a Smash Hits article on “Sacrifice”:

“I’ve always admired Elton John. He’s not my kind of groove if you get what I mean but I’ve always admired him because he’s a good writer. ‘Candle In The Wind’ is a fabulous song and the lyrics in his new one are really good so I’m into the Elton record, yer.

Oh, it was the lyrics then. Let’s have a look at them again. This is the chorus:

And it’s no sacrifice
Just a simple word
It’s two hearts living
In two separate worlds
But it’s no sacrifice
No sacrifice
It’s no sacrifice at all

Hmm. Doesn’t seem to be a lot going on there except the repeated use of the word ‘sacrifice’. I’m not having it Mr Tunes – don’t tell him I said that though.

The play out video is “She Ain’t Worth It” by Glenn Medeiros and Bobby Brown. After his music career ended, Medeiros took up teaching and is now the president of St. Louis School, an all boys Catholic school in Honolulu. Sounds impressive doesn’t it…until you realise that he has a son called Chord and a daughter called Lyric. No, really.

For posterity’s sake, I include the chart run down below:

Order of appearanceArtistSongDid I Buy it?
1Inspiral CarpetsShe Comes In The FallNope
2Janet JacksonAlrightAll wrong – no
3PoisonUnskinny BopNo
4Double TroubleLove Don’t Live Here AnymoreNo love for this one at my house
5MC Tunes versus 808 StateThe Only Rhyme That BitesLiked it, didn’t buy it
6F.A.B featuring MC ParkerThunderbirds Are GoLoved Thunderbirds, didn’t love this – no
7Craig McLachlan Check 1-2MonaI did not
8Massivo featuring TracyLoving YouNah
9MC HammerU Can’t Touch ThisAnd I didn’t – no
10Elton JohnSacrifice /Healing HandsNot knowingly but I’ve since discovered that Healing Hands is on a Q Magazine compilation LP that I bought. That doesn’t count does it?!
11Glenn Medeiros and Bobby BrownShe Ain’t Worth ItAnd neither was this song

Disclaimer

OK – here’s the thing – the TOTP episodes are only available on iPlayer for a limited amount of time so the link to the programme below only works for about another month so you’ll have to work fast if you want to catch the whole show.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000rgm4/top-of-the-pops-05071990

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

Some bedtime reading?

https://michaelmouse1967.wixsite.com/smashhits-remembered/1990-issues

TOTP 22 JUN 1990

If a week can be a long time in politics then that is also true of football (and quite possibly music). When last week’s TOTP was aired, the England national team had made a sluggish start to Italia ’90 and were being widely criticised in the media. Fast forward eight days and they have turned things around and qualified for the knockout stages after defeating the might of Egypt in the last group game. Hang on, eight days you say? Yes, this particular TOTP went out on the Friday rather than in its regular Thursday night slot so as to clear the schedules for that England v Egypt game the day before. Suddenly hopes were revived and the nation looked forward (albeit with some trepidation) to the next game versus Belgium.

Those eight days have also proved to be a long time in the pop music world as tonight’s show has nine (!) ‘new’ songs on it and only four that we have seen before in no small part due to the return of the Breakers section. Tonight’s host is Jakki Brambles whose previous recent appearances on the show have been dominated by her wearing of big Winter coats even under TV studio lights. With it being the height of Summer though she peeled all her layers off and gone for a white t-shirt and ripped jeans look topped off with an embroidered baseball cap. The T-shirt proclaims the legend that is The Royal Findhorn Yacht Club (I have no idea) and Jakki seems to be in a rush to get off (possibly to do some tacking on a schooner or something – as I said I have no idea) judging by the speed with which she is talking.

We start tonight with Brummie rockers Magnum who were last seen in the Top 40 back in ’88 with a trio of medium-sized hits from their “Wings Of Heaven” album which was the peak of their commercial success. I have no recollection of them still having chart hits into the 90s but here they are with a little ditty called “Rockin’ Chair”. Taken from an album called “Goodnight L.A.”, it sounds pretty unexceptional, rock fodder to me but supposedly the album was meant to be an attempt to break the band in the US and was seen by critics as taking the band in an ‘Americanised’ and more commercial direction. If anything, to my ears, it sounds less commercial than their previous hits like “Start Talking Love” and “Days Of No Trust”. Anyway, what do I know? So did Magnum manage to break America? No, no they didn’t and you know why they didn’t? The album was never released in the United States! Right, scratch that comment about what do I know because I may not be a record company executive but I do know that if you want to break America, it’s a good idea to release your album there so that people can, you know, actually buy it!

The album did OK in the UK (where it was released) peaking at No 9 and presumably it did well in Germany judging by Jakki’s comments about the band entertaining 50,000 East Berliners recently.

“Rockin’ Chair” peaked at No 27 but their last single previous to that was a No 33 hit called “It Must Have Been Love” talking of which…

…here come Roxette enjoying the biggest hit of their career with “It Must Have Been Love”. Often dismissed as insubstantial and not deserving of any credibility claims, it’s fair to say that the duo rarely get referenced as being the musical influence of…well…anybody really. Having said that, they racked up a smorgasbord of hit singles throughout their career which, incidentally, spanned 33 (!) years. I always got the impression that they were not that bothered by the criticism that dogged them, steeled by the knowledge that they were good at what they did – writing, recording and performing well crafted pop tunes. Indeed, so comfortable were they with their image that they even called one of their compilation albums “Don’t Bore Us – Get To The Chorus!”. If that doesn’t display a healthy degree of self knowledge then I don’t know what does!

“It Must Have Been Love” peaked at No 3 in the UK and was a Top 10 hit in just about every country around the world going to No 1 in the US, Australia, Denmark and Spain to name but a few.

Well here’s a treat – two acts for the price of one! Never has the acronym BOGOF been more apt though as said acts are Sonia and Big Fun! What?! Why?! What possible justification could there be for this unholy pairing?! What? It was for charity? Which charity? Childline? Oh..well…I can’t really…oh OK, it seems there was some credible justification but it doesn’t mean I have to like the song does it? And I don’t. It’s not even a cover of the James Taylor classic “You’ve Got a Friend” but another Stock, Aitken and Waterman composition.

Watching this performance back, it looks just wrong for them all to be sat down for the duration of the song Westlife-esque when we were used to seeing Big Fun jumping around the TOTP stage wiggling their arses for all their worth and little Sonia doing her rolling shoulders nerdy dance moves. It’s not that easy to transform yourself from pop puppets to serious artists surely? Just by the addition of some stools? *Insert your own jokes*

In a Smash Hits interview around this time to promote the single, when Big Fun’s Jason John was asked if they dreaded ‘the dumper’ and what would they do if they fell into it, he replied:

I don’t think about the dumper because we’re really only just beginning our careers…”

Hmm. After “You’ve Got a Friend” peaked at No 14, Big Fun never had another Top 40 single. After disbanding, one of them became a painter and decorator whilst Jason ‘we’ve only just begun’ John decamped to the US to run a nightclub in New York.

It’s those famous musical offspring Wilson Phillips next who are bounding up the charts with their single “Hold On”. The group En Vogue also had a hit with a song called “Hold On” in this year – they were on the show only the other week – and it got me thinking whether “Hold On” was a popular song title of choice for recording artists. I found a website that listed 45 cover versions and distinct songs that happen to share the title “Hold On”. They included artists as diverse as Tom Waits through to Donny Osmond via Santana and KT Tunstall. And whose song called “Hold On” was the most commercially successful? Why, Wilson Phillips of course (En Vogue came in second).

Some Breakers now starting with Red Hot Chili Peppers and “Taste The Pain”. Despite being around since 1984, I have to admit that they hadn’t been on my radar at all in that time and I can’t say I remember this track either. I wouldn’t really become aware of them until the following year and the release of their “Blood Sugar Sex Magik” album and attendant singles “Give It Away” and the anthemic “Under The Bridge” which I bought. “Taste The Pain” was from their previous studio album “Mother’s Milk” and became the band’s first UK hit single peaking at No 29. I hadn’t realised before but they actually had a track on the multi platinum Pretty Woman soundtrack album called “Show Me Your Soul”. Given the film and soundtrack’s popularity and seeing what it was doing for the career of Roxette whom we saw earlier, I can’t help wondering if they wouldn’t have been better off releasing that as a single?

I can’t move on though without a mention for Celtic ‘bagrock’ outfit Red Hot Chilli Pipers whose lineup features three highland bagpipers and traditional marching snare backed by a more traditional rock band. Their live show even features highland dancing! I’ve yet to catch them live myself yet but a friend who has say they are quite the experience.

Bruce Dickinson covering “All The Young Dudes”? Even if this was for charity* as per Sonia and Big Fun (which it wasn’t) it would still be inexcusable. This David Bowie penned tune that was turned into a massive hit by Mott The Hoople really didn’t need the Dickinson treatment. I couldn’t see that it added anything to the original being a pretty straight cover. I suppose it was a canny marketing move by Bruce’s label to release a well known song to help promote his “Tattooed Millionaire” album but still.

*Two years later, Dickinson did record a song for charity when he combined with Rowan Atkinson in his Mr. Bean alter ego to record Alice Cooper’s “(I Want To Be) Elected” for Comic Relief which went to No 9 which was 14 places higher than “All The Young Dudes”.

And talking of Alice Cooper, completing a trio of rock-related Breakers, are Dogs D’Amour who once toured with Alice around the start of the new millennium. Back in 1990 though, they were in the Top 40 again for the second and final time. Having finally breached the chart ramparts in ’89 with ‘Satellite Kid”, “Victims Of Success” was the lead single from their album “Straight??!!” and I have to say the title didn’t ring any bells with me. Having given it a listen, it sounds like a rather unremarkable blues rock song full of guitar twangs and hackneyed lyrics like these:

“Yesterdays punks on the cover of the rolling stone
Yesterdays punks could buy a Beverly Hills home”

I’m kind of surprised it managed to sneak into the charts to be honest. Maybe they were riding on the coattails of the success their good buddies The Quireboys were enjoying around this time?

“Straight??!!” would be the last studio album to feature the band’s ‘classic’ line up (it says on Wikipedia) before they split. Top Dog Tyla (real name Timothy Taylor) would resurrect the brand in various different formats and line ups over the years as well as collaborating on a project entitled Hot Knives with long-time friend *checks notes* ah yes, Spike… from The Quireboys.

“Victims Of Success” peaked at No 36.

A return to the show for the break out star of ’88 next as we witness the return of Yazz with her new single “Treat Me Good”. Just two short years since her massive No 1 single “The Only Way Is Up”, Yazz was at a crossroads. Her debut album “Wanted” had gone double platinum but the singles released from it had all peaked at a lower chart position than the one before. Her next move was career crucial. “Treat Me Good” was to be the lead single from an album initially entitled “Revolution Of Love” (presumably the album due out “at the end of the Summer” as advised by Jakki Brambles) but it never appeared and was canned when Yazz left her record label Big Life. Were they disappointed by the commercial performance of “Treat Me Good”? Despite a 10 place move up the charts after this TOTP outing, the single would get no further than that No 20 peak and would be in and out of the Top 100 in five weeks. To be fair, it didn’t really sound to me like it had that ‘Wow!’ factor that “The Only Way Is Up” had and was a pretty sub-standard R’n’B pop number.

Re-emerging with Polydor Records, Yazz once again found herself in the position where a proposed second album was shelved when “One True Woman” failed to appear in May ’92. After one final return to the Top 40 in ’93 with Aswad with a cover version of Ace’s “How Long”, her sophomore album finally emerged more than five years after her debut. It bombed completely. Yazz continued to release singles and one further album into the 90s but she then found herself at another crossroads (this time of a more personal nature) when her marriage to her husband (who was also her manager and publisher and father of baby Rio mentioned by Jakki Brambles in her intro) broke down. After finding Christianity, Yazz now spreads the gospel message in prisons and released a record called “This Is Love” which was inspired by her experiences.

And yes Jakki, she did look incredible just eight weeks after giving birth.

After the decade that was the 80s had seen fit to allow Aussie soap Neighbours to spawn bona fide chart stars in Kylie, Jason Donovan and (for the love of God!) Stefan Dennis, you would have thought that the 90s would have brought a stop to that but no! There was still another of the cast that felt that the world of pop had space for one more…all hail Craig McLachlan And Check 1-2. As referenced by Jakki Brambles in her intro, Craig had played the role of Henry Ramsey (the brother of Kylie’s character Charlene) in Neighbours for nearly three years but by the time of his foray into music and subsequent hit with “Mona” he had swapped allegiances and transferred to the other Aussie soap Home And Away. I have very distinct memories of Henry Ramsey whilst I was still a student at Sunderland Poly – nasty mullet and dungarees worn without a T -shirt which the women that I was friendly with at the time were quite taken with – but I had no idea that he had pop star pretensions.

Now admittedly it was a very low bar but I didn’t mind “Mona” (compared to Stefan Dennis, he was the height of credibility) and it was a tune that was written by blues rock ‘n’ roll legend Bo Diddley which had been performed previously by the likes of The Rolling Stones, The Troggs and Bruce Springsteen so Stock, Aitken and Waterman this was not. I’m pretty sure I didn’t realise the song’s origins at the time but fourteen years after it was a hit in the UK, I saw a band perform their own version of this in whilst on holiday in San Francisco. I can’t remember the name of the band but the venue was called the Biscuits And Blues Bar and I remember thinking there’s no way this can be a Craig McLachlan original if this authentic blues band are performing it!

After peaking at No 2 in the UK, it seem that Craig might have a shot at usurping his one time co-star Jason Donovan in UK pop fans’ affections given that old Jase seemed to be on a downward commercial trend but after one more single (the No 16 hit “Amanda”) he was pretty much gone. He did follow Donovan’s trick of releasing a song from a stage musical three years later when “You’re the One That I Want” from Grease in which he was starring with Debbie Gibson made No 13 in the UK Top 40 (Donovan had scored a No 1 with “Any Dream Will Do” from Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat) but he would never again return to our charts.

Inevitably, and very much seen as the classical antidote to New Order’s “World In Motion”, here is the BBC’s Italia ’90 theme tune “Nessun Dorma” by Luciano Pavarotti. Now inextricably linked in the psyche of every English football fan with the events of June /July 1990 and the fortunes of the national team, how many of us had ever heard of it (or indeed Pavarotti) before?

The BBC really pulled it out of the bag when it came to soundtracking their coverage of this World Cup. Does anybody recall the ITV opening titles and music? I didn’t and had to look it up. Here’s their opening titles….

…just dreadful. Apparently it was entitled “Tutti Al Mondo”, was written by Rod Argent and Peter Van Hooke and …oh nobody cares do they? ITV’s theme tune was crushed by the BBC and Pavarotti’s weight as easily as Gazza’s tears started to flow after that booking in the semi final. A few words about the opening title graphics before we move on which were awful as well. The crass image of the statue of David nonchalantly nodding some footballs around and the official mascot stick figure player called Ciao added in to ensure the full tacky horror couldn’t be missed. Comparing the two is a bit like on The Apprentice when the two teams do the advert task and one team has understood the brief completely and delivered something concise and on message and the other team has just came up with a slogan that they thought was a clever word play and completely missed the point of what they were trying to sell. Somebody in the ITV creative team should have got fired.

“Nessun Dorma” was a No 2 hit on the UK Top 40 and after the Three Tenors concert in Rome the night before the final was played featuring José Carreras, Plácido Domingo and of course Pavarotti spawned the classic live album, the world went classical music mad. That album became the best-selling classical album of all time and even changed the way the music industry marketed its classical catalogue with a whole new category called ‘strategic classical’ set up to try and reach new audiences via huge marketing campaigns.

My own personal memory of the whole Nessun Dorma / Three Tenors phenomenon was that my future father -in -law was so enthused by the concert that he taped it off the TV (remember when we used to do that?) to keep for posterity but my future mother-in- law taped over it with an episode of Eastenders by mistake. Once the incident had been discovered I was dispatched into Hull town centre to ask around the music shops to see if anyone knew when the official video would be coming out. There was no release date forthcoming so we had to pretend that the precious VHS tape couldn’t be found whenever my father-in-law asked about watching the concert over again for many months until the official release could be bought for him.

MC Tunes in the area! The Moss Side rapper is back on the show with his hit single “The Only Rhyme That Bites” although this week we get the video. @TOTPFacts has unearthed this about the promo:

Hmm. Well, it just looks to me like a load of guys skateboarding and not especially impressively. I suppose we all have to start somewhere and Ken Horn did go onto produce a number of successful TV shows including the Jimmy McGovern drama The Street and the fifth series of the superb Line Of Duty. Back in 1990 though, it looked like brother Trevor had the monopoly on the family talent.

By the way, if you’re wondering whatever happened to MC Tunes and wanted to know more about what sort of person he was/is, don’t go looking to Wikipedia for the answer. Under the category Personal Life, it just says:

Tunes still lives in Manchester.

“The Only Rhyme That Bites” peaked at No 10.

And so it came to pass that Elton John‘s first ever solo No 1 would be with the brain stupefying “Sacrifice / Healing Hands”. After his ridiculously flamboyant outfits of yesteryear (Donald Duck anyone?), Elton has completely toned it down and gone for an all black ensemble topped off with a BOY cap. Were they popular at the time? I’m pretty sure Chris Lowe of the Pet Shops Boys used to wear one back in the day but were they still a thing in 1990?

The single was taken from the album “Sleeping With The Past” which in a Smash Hits feature where pop stars named their favourite ever albums, that man from Big Fun Jason John (whom we heard from earlier) was at it again giving us the benefit of his wisdom. Here he is:

Sonia actually gave me this LP as a present a few weeks ago…It must be one of the best albums he’s ever done…Personally I’ve become a big Elton fan after listening to this album. It’s been a big inspiration to me.”

Hmm. Not “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road” then? “Too Low For Zero” maybe? “Don’t Shoot Me I’m Only The Piano Player”? No? OK, Jase, you know best.

At the song’s end, there’s a weird interaction between Jakki Brambles and Elton where she strides across the stage, offers her had to Elton to shake and then kisses his! There then follows an excruciating exchange where Jakki asks Elton how he is and which charities the royalties from the single are supporting. Elton is almost monosyllabic in his replies. Now if you really want to see a proper Elton John interview, may I recommend this…

So put off her stride is Jakki that she forgets to introduce the play out song which is one of the biggest and most talked about hits of the year – it’s MC Hammer with “U Can’t Touch This”. This tune was absolutely massive back in the day but more seemed to be made in the press about Hammer’s baggy loon pants (that tapered to the ankle) in the video.

Famously based on “Super Freak” by Rick James, “U Can’t Touch This” made Hammer a huge star briefly. Parent album “Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em” stayed at No 1 in the US album charts for 21 weeks and was the best selling album of 1990 there. Multiple awards followed and his extensive tours raked in the money. It’s 1990 and the living is good for MC Hammer. It wouldn’t last though but that’s all for another post.

“U Can’t Touch This” peaked at No 3 in the UK Top 40.

For posterity’s sake, I include the chart run down below:

Order of appearanceArtistSongDid I Buy it?
1MagnumRockin’ ChairNah
2RoxetteIt Must Have Been LoveNegative
3Sonia and Big FunYou’ve Got A FriendBut it’s not me!
4Wilson PhillipsHold OnNo
5Red Hot Chili PeppersTaste The PainNope
6Bruce DickinsonAll The Young DudesAs if
7Dogs D’AmourVictims Of SuccessIt’s a no from me
8YazzTreat Me GoodIt was really weak sounding to me – no
9Craig McLachlan Check 1-2MonaI did not
10Luciano PavarottiNessun DormaFor all the memories it always invokes, I didn’t but it
11MC Tunes versus 808 StateThe Only Rhyme That BitesLiked it, didn’t buy it
12Elton JohnSacrifice /Healing HandsCertainly not!
13MC HammerU Can’t Touch ThisAnd I didn’t – no

Disclaimer

OK – here’s the thing – the TOTP episodes are only available on iPlayer for a limited amount of time so the link to the programme below only works for about another month so you’ll have to work fast if you want to catch the whole show.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000r6hy/top-of-the-pops-22061990

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

Some bedtime reading?

https://michaelmouse1967.wixsite.com/smashhits-remembered/1990-issues

TOTP 07 JUN 1990

Hello and welcome back to TOTP Rewind. BBC4 took a break from their TOTP repeat broadcasts over Xmas and the New Year but are back on schedule now. We re-start back in June 1990 and I’ve just had my 22nd birthday! 22! It’s literally a lifetime ago – how did I get to be so old? I suppose the intervening 30 years had something to do with it! To recap, I’ve just moved up to Hull from Worcester having finally secured some work after five months on the dole and am living with my girlfriend and her parents. My job is at Kingston Communications* doing some very basic VDU input on a temporary contract. As I remember, it was putting in employee time sheets into a database and there was a massive back log of them so quite a few weeks work.

*One of the many things that makes Hull unique is the fact that it is the only place in the UK not served by BT but by its own telecoms services run by KCOM (formerly Kingston Communications).

The day after this TOTP was broadcast, the 1990 World Cup kicked off with England expectations pretty low after a disastrous Euro ’88 showing. Italia ’90 would turn out to be a watershed moment for our national game. Enough of all that though, what about the music? Well, there are seven ‘new’ songs on the show that we haven’t seen before and the presenter is the ever so clean looking Mark Goodier who promises us a “special surprise” at the top of the show. Ooh! Wonder what that could be?

Before any of that though we’re kicking off with Pop Will Eat Itself and only their second ever Top 40 hit “Touched By The Hand Of Cicciolina”. I’d first come across this lot when they released a cover of Sigue Sigue Sputnik’s “Love Missile F1-11” in 1987 but I hadn’t quite grasped at the time that they were part of the same ‘grebo’ movement that would launch the likes of The Wonder Stuff, Ned’s Atomic Dustbin and Gaye Bykers On Acid. Indeed The Poppies*, The Stuffies* and The Neds* were all from the same place; Stourbridge in the West Midlands which was my original neck of the woods so I really should have had a better handle on all these bands.

*No amount of dropping their shortened names can cover that up (Credibility ed).

By 1990, they had carved out a career of sample-laden, indie dance rock tunes with singles like “Def. Con. One” and “Can U Dig It”. With one eye on the imminent Italia ’90 World Cup, the single “Touched By The Hand Of Cicciolina” was promoted as the ‘unofficial World Cup Theme’ and includes sampled crowd chants and I’m pretty sure snatches of match commentary by the likes of Barry Davies and John Motson. And Cicciolina? This referred to…oh tell you what…here’s @TOTPFacts with that particular back story:

Well, if Boris Johnson felt comfortable saying Donald Trump deserved a Nobel Peace Prize when Foreign Secretary back in 2018, then I hope somebody nominated Cicciolina back in the day for her unorthodox peace process plan.

Apparently the marketing campaign for the “Touched By The Hand Of Cicciolina” single included an absurd notion to petition for Cicciolina to be the person who presented the World Cup to the winning team at the conclusion of Italia ’90. I’m guessing the single’s title was inspired by New Order’s 1987 single “Touched By The Hand Of God” – the Mancs are also of course indelibly linked with Italia ’90 due to “World In Motion” which we will be seeing later. I was chatting with my friend Robin at the weekend and he disputed my claim that “World In Motion” is the best football song ever declaring that, indeed, he preferred “Touched By The Hand Of Cicciolina”. Never one to follow popular opinion Robin but I do think he means it! Robin’s favourite footy song peaked at No 28.

Historically when TOTP presenters make chart predictions they usually over estimate the potential of a single, rashly forecasting a No 1 record. In the case of Elton John and “Sacrifice” this evening’s host Mark Goodier does the opposite and under estimates its chart peak by saying it “could well end up being a Top 5 record that”. It of course went all the way to No 1 and not just any No 1 but Elton’s first as a solo artist. I say “Sacrifice” but it was actually “Sacrifice / Healing Hands” as it was a double A -side release. Both songs had been previously issued as singles in their own right at the tale end of 1989 with neither breaching the Top 40 but after Radio 1 DJ Steve Wright inexplicably started playing “Sacrifice” on his show in the Summer of 1990, it was re-released after audience reaction. How apt that a man infamously not that bothered about music would have a key role in getting such a bloated, lifeless dirge of a song to the top of the charts. In its defence, as Goodier says, it did raise money for charity (the AIDS Foundation I think) but it seems a travesty that “Sacrifice / Healing Hands” was the single to finally secure him a No 1 in his own right. So many more songs in his back catalogue deserving of that particular accolade. Of the two, I slightly preferred “Healing Hands” but I’m splitting arse hairs to be honest.

My aforementioned friend Robin and I once had a disagreement over a drink in a London pub about Elton’s back catalogue – he dismissed it all (and I mean every song) as awful. When I countered that you couldn’t say all his songs were shit he replied “Of course I can. Music taste is subjective – I thought you knew that”. I had no comeback. Smart arse.

Talking of double A-sides here comes a dance act I have no memory of at all. D-Shake were from Holland apparently and its their track “Yaaah” that gets a spin on the show tonight but it was the flip “Techno Trance (Paradise Is Now)” that all the DJs in the know were playing in the clubs apparently including the likes of Carl Cox. I’ve listened to both (although they actually seem to be different versions of the same track) and can confirm they are both horrible.

The guy behind D-Shake was a guy called Aad de Mooy who sounds like he plays up front for Huddersfield (or maybe Brighton) and according to the Discogs website has 31 different aliases including Cat Scanner, Jackhead and my particular favourite Dr Nunu. By the way, check out Goodier’s arse clenchingly awful intro to this one:

“What’s the secret of a good dance song – it’s definitely a good groove…”

A good groove?! He’s only one step away from saying (in true embarrassing Dad style) “It’s got a good beat and you can dance to it”. Oh Christ! That’s what I sound like when I talk about music to my 11 year old isn’t it?! “Yaaah” / “Techno Trance (Paradise Is Now)” peaked at No 20.

In all of these TOTP reviews I have done stretching way back to 1983, it feels like very few bands have been on as much as The Mission. I mean maybe some of the really big hitters like Erasure, Depeche Mode etc but of those who have not had massive hits I can think of only maybe Siouxsie And The Banshees. And despite all of those appearances, not once did The Mission ever have a Top 10 hit. “Into The Blue” was their eighth consecutive Top 40 hit and was the last single to be taken from their “Carved In Sand” album. Goodier is at it again with a really patronising intro when he says “Coming up a band who really can play their instruments” Eh? Why did he feel the need to day that. Was there some conspiracy theory going around that they were just Milli Vanilli-esque record company stooges who didn’t actually play on their records? He goes onto call the single a “big chart smash”. Was it Mark? This is its chart record:

35 – 32 – 65

Hmm. Hardly a biggie. Three weeks on the chart in total with a high of No 32 then gone! I have to admit this one doesn’t do much for me. I don’t mind their sound but it does all start to sound the same after a while. Damn! I’m sounding like an embarrassing Dad again! By the way, Wayne Hussey and bassist Craig Adams used to be in The Sisters Of Mercy but left to form The Mission. So what I hear you cry. Well, here’s @TOTPFacts again to fill in the gaps:

The first of just three songs on the show that we have seen before next as we’re back with the dance tunes when we get another eyeful / earful of Don Pablo’s Animals and their version of “Venus”. As with D-Shake earlier, these lot were a European collective of producers but where D-Shake were from Holland, DPA* were Italian and German consisting of Paolo Bisiach, Christian Hornbostel and Mauro Ferrucci. And just like D-Shake founder Aad de Mooy, all three sound like they could have Premier League connections. I’m going for:

  • Paolo Bisiach – a Liverpool centre back in the mid 90s
  • Christian Hornbostel – a Southampton manager
  • Mauro Ferrucci – a Chelsea left back in the early 2000s

You can tell I’ve run out of things to say about Don Pablo’s Animals can’t you?

*Did anyone call them that? Bit like did anybody really call Tears For Fears ‘TFF’ apart from Peter Powell of course!

Goodier mispronounces the name of the next act who are Wilson Phillips or ‘Wilston Phillips’ as our host calls them (thanks to my wife for spotting that little gaff). Ah yes, Wilson Phillips whom you cannot mention without referencing their rock heritage. So much was made of the fact that Chynna Phillips is the daughter of John Phillips and Michelle Phillips of The Mamas & The Papas, while Carnie Wilson and Wendy Wilson are the daughters of Brian Wilson of The Beach Boys and Marilyn Rovell of The Honeys. They must have got so fed up of answering questions about their famous parents when doing promotional interviews for the record. Whatever promotion they did though must have worked as their debut single “Hold On” went to No 1 in the US and No 6 over here.

The other big talking point about the trio was their vocal harmonies which are all over “Hold On” which is one of the perkiest pop songs you might ever hear despite its lyrics being inspired by Chynna Phillips’s experiences with substance abuse and the AA. I used to work with someone who said this was one of his favourite songs ever although I’m not entirely sure he wasn’t winding me up.

Despite initially breaking up in 1992, the trio have reunited a few times over the years including for this scene at the climax of the film Bridesmaids which is one of those movies I always end up watching if I stumble over it while channel flipping.

If it’s 1990 then it must be Madchester and here’s someone else who was seen as being part of that movement and for once, he was actually from Manchester! MC Tunes was from the infamous Moss Side area of that great city which (certainly when I lived there and not that far from Moss Side itself) had a reputation for high crime rates, regular stabbings, drugs and gangsters. The image of his glaring face and intimidating stare on the cover of his album “The North At Its Heights” would absolutely have you believe that Tunes could handle himself in Moss Side. Indeed, Mark Goodier seems so unnerved by his presence in the TOTP studio that he stumbles over his intro seeming to change his description of Tunes from a ‘man’ to a ‘lad’ halfway through.

“The Only Rhyme That Bites” was his debut single and biggest hit of his career and was made in conjunction with fellow Mancs 808 State. Cleverly based around a sample from the main title theme to the Western The Big Country which pulled you in from the start, it would go Top 10 in the UK. However, after his initial success, his solo career fell away a bit and by 1995 he had left his MC Tunes alter ego behind and formed the achingly trendy Dust Junkys who just about everybody I ever worked with in multiple Our Price shops in the Greater Manchester area seemed to love …except me. I always quite liked “The Only Rhyme That Bites” though. So apparently did Goodier who pulls out a “Wicked, wicked” line to describe it at the end of the performance. Dearie me.

Just when you thought he couldn’t plumb the depths of naffness any deeper, Goodier uses the phrase “1990 stylee” to introduce “Papa Was a Rollin’ Stone” by Was (Not Was). How did this man ever achieve such longevity as a broadcaster?!

David and Don Was (not their real names) have done some truly remarkable work I think but this cover of The Temptations’ 1972 hit left me cold. Songs like “Out Come The Freaks”, “I Feel Better Than James Brown” and “How The Heart Behaves” sound brilliant but this? Nah, not for me. I’d even take “Walk The Dinosaur” over this! They retuned to the charts in 1992 in a big way with the No 4 hit “Shake Your Head” featuring the vocals of Ozzy Osbourne and Hollywood movie star Kim Basinger and a Best Of album called “Hello Dad…I’m In Jail” which I bought but again they recorded another uninspiring cover version (INXS’s “Listen Like Thieves”) to promote it. Just stick to your own songs guys!

At least Goodier agrees with me (and therefore disagrees with my friend Robin) that “World In Motion” by New Order is the best football song ever as we get to the new No 1 and its time for that surprise! It’s only a live interview with the England 1990 World Cup squad! Would this have been seen as event TV back in the day? Maybe I guess. What follows though is the lamest of banter (courtesy of Gazza and a fake sleeping Chris Waddle) whilst Goodier attempts to prove to the watching millions that he’s actually a football fan as well. About as convincing as David ‘Is it Aston Villa or West Ham’ Cameron mate.

As for the song, apparently the FA hadn’t been that keen on the involvement of New Order and the band never got any World Cup tickets or freebies. National treasure and star striker Gary Lineker wasn’t keen either describing football songs as “a bit twee” but John Barnes was all for it and of course he would go onto seal his small but perfectly formed place in pop history with that rap. Supposedly the few players that did turn up to the recording session disappeared halfway through to open a Topman store in Middlesbrough! Talking of which, mention must go to the ultimate top man of football songs Keith Allen who helped write the lyrics and of course appears in the video. He would return to that rather niche genre again in 1998 being involved with both “Vindaloo” by Fat Les and “England’s Irie” by Black Grape. I read his autobiography a few years ago which was a fascinating read. He supports Fulham in case you were wondering.

We close with one of the most well known power ballads of all time. “It Must Have Been Love” by Roxette is of course forever associated with the film Pretty Woman in which it featured but it’s also taken on a life of its own soundtracking many a relationship break up and still gets regular radio airplay to this day.

The band were big news in the US after clocking up two Billboard No 1s in 1989 and so were approached to record a song for the film’s soundtrack album. Rather than recording something brand new, they just reworked an existing song called “It Must Have Been Love (Christmas for the Broken Hearted)” which had been a big hit in their native Sweden but had not been released globally so remained unknown to most of the planet’s pop fans. Not for long though as both the soundtrack album and “It Must Have Been Love” took off in a massive way with the latter supplying the duo with their third US No 1. It was also a No 3 in the UK and remains their biggest hit here. I’m guessing that it must also be their most well known song. They would return the following year with the album and single “Joyride” – yet another US No 1 single.

Order of appearanceArtistSongDid I Buy it?
1Pop Will Eat ItselfTouched by The Hand of CicciolinaI didn’t – sorry Robin
2Elton JohnSacrifice /Healing HandsCertainly not!
3D-ShakeYaaahNaaah
4The MissionInto The BlueNope
5Don Pablo’s AnimalsVenusNo but my wife had it on a Smash Hits Rave album
6Wilson PhillipsHold OnNo
7MC Tunes versus 808 StateThe Only Rhyme That BitesI didn’t
8Was (Not Was)Papa Was A Rollin’ StoneNo but it’s on my Best Of album of their which I bought
9New OrderWorld In MotionCall the cops! There’s been a robbery. This isn’t in my singles box!
10RoxetteIt Must Have Been LoveNegative

Disclaimer

OK – here’s the thing – the TOTP episodes are only available on iPlayer for a limited amount of time so the link to the programme below only works for about another month so you’ll have to work fast if you want to catch the whole show.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000qzmj/top-of-the-pops-07061990

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

Some bedtime reading?

https://michaelmouse1967.wixsite.com/smashhits-remembered/1990-issues