Gloria Estefan

TOTP 05 JUN 1998

I’m nearly 30! Back in 1998 that is. I’m pushing 60 now. Where did all the time go? I’ll tell you where all the time goes these days – on writing this blog! Two TOTP repeats a week is hard work. I’m sure BBC4 only used to air one show every seven days when I first started doing this back in 2017. Much more manageable. Anyway, it’s my choice so I’ll just have to quit my bellyaching and get on with it. So, back in 1998, this particular TOTP was broadcast the day before my 30th birthday and to mark the milestone my wife and I went to Edinburgh for the weekend. Having looked at the running order for this one, I can see English, Irish and Welsh artists but nobody Scottish. As ever then, I was out of step with the musical tastes of the British record buying public!

Our host is Jo Whiley (who seems to be trying out Björk’s hairstyle for size) and we start with an Australian in the diminutive form of Natalie Imbruglia who is experiencing a form of diminishing returns as her third single “Wishing I Was There” peaks at its debut position of No 19. “Torn” and “Big Mistake” had both been No 2 hits with the former especially being a huge commercial and airplay success. This one, however, couldn’t replicate said success and watching this performance, I can see and hear why. There’s a lot of posturing, growling and attitude from Natalie but there’s not much of an actual song to hang it all onto. The overall effect is that of an overly eager Alanis Morissette wannabe. The rock guitar ending seems especially over the top. Bizarrely, a fourth single released from her “Left Of The Middle” album called “Smoke” would return her to the Top 5. You tell me.

The Irish contingent is represented next by Boyzone. Now this track. – “All That I Need” – was No 1 ages ago (the show dated 1st May to be exact) and was not even in the Top 20 at this point so what was it doing back on the show? Well, this seems to be a case of more performance recycling from executive producer Chris Cowey. He’s shoehorned this one in under the guise of the lads’ latest album “Where We Belong” being No 1 on the album chart but that’s seems like a flimsy bit of reasoning. An album chart section wasn’t a regular feature (I think it was back in the ‘year zero’ revamp era) so why bring it back now? Will we see it in every show from now on? Nah, I’m not buying it (the album chart grift not this Boyzone single though obviously I didn’t buy that either).

Here come the Welsh! Yes, it’s those alt rockers, those power poppers, those neo-psychedelics (I’ve no idea what I’m talking about!) the Super Furry Animals with the title track of an EP no less called “Ice Hockey Hair”. To quote Chris Tarrant, this is what the kids wanted! Something to make them think, to question the established norms and to fuck with their heads! Not that bland nonsense Boyzone were pedalling! And for once, maybe the kids were listening as this became The Furries highest charting single to date when it debuted at No 12 after their last five hits had all peaked between Nos 27 and 22. This was also a favourite of the inkies music press with Melody Maker naming it the tenth best single of the year and the NME proclaiming it the second. And why not? It’s a glorious mix of styles with some reviews detecting Queen, ELO, Pavement and Wings combined with what the NME termed “mad, techno squalling”. But what was “Ice Hockey Hair”? Well, it was another term for the mullet hairstyle that the band picked up from a conversation with a Swedish football player (as you do).

The EP’s opening track was a little ditty called “Smokin’” which was used to soundtrack a Channel 4 series about the Seven Deadly Sins and, in particular, the episode about ‘Sloth’ presented by Howard Marks. Yes, that Howard Marks so you can guess what the track was about. It should be of no surprise though as the Super Furry Animals weren’t afraid to push the boundaries. In fact, the band didn’t give a fuck. Ahem.

This next song represents the countries of Turkey, Germany and England – this is “Horny ‘98” by Mousse T versus Hot ‘n’ Juicy. Now depending on your point of view, this was either a cheeky, cheesy dance floor banger or utter filth which was corrupting the pure minds of the young generation. Actually, there’s a third option which was to find it, like me, just plain annoying. Mousse T is Mustafo Gündoğdu, a German-Turkish DJ and producer whose CV includes the accolade of being one of Germany’s first producers of house music and, by way of contrast, a stint as a judge on the German version of Pop Idol. Hot ‘n’ Juicy were Emma Lanford and Nadine Richardson who lived in a tower block in the former Lee Bank estate of Birmingham. There doesn’t seem an obvious connection between the two camps but at some point their paths crossed and “Horny ‘98” was the result. Listening to the track today, it seems quite repetitive (if catchy) but maybe that was requisite to be a club anthem? I don’t know. I was nearly 30 so I don’t think I was frequenting that many nightclubs at the time. I can imagine though that women up and down the country were receiving unsolicited attention from many a drunken male reveller whose opening line was “I’m horny, horny, horny, horny”. The whole thing was just awful.

What’s happening here? A performance of a song that wouldn’t be released as a single for six weeks and which host Jo Whiley says we weren’t meant to see until July? Ah but…there’s some headline-making, mitigating circumstances at play here which my last post was based around – Geri Halliwell leaving the Spice Girls. Right, so there’s a lot to unpack here starting with the insight from Whiley that some TOTP performances were filmed way ahead of release schedules. “Viva Forever” would not be in the record shops until 20th July yet here it was on TOTP on the 5th June! Was this standard practice? Certainly you can tell from some of the presenter links in these shows that the artists are not in the studio with the host at the same time. In the case of the Spice Girls though, there were some very specific circumstances peculiar to this single. The release schedule for “Viva Forever” was a mess. Originally reported as being out as a double A-side with the track “Never Give Up On The Good Times” on May 25th, it never appeared presumably because the group were on their Spiceworld tour and not available to do promotional duties. I’m guessing that this TOTP appearance was squeezed in to be kept until “Viva Forever” was in the charts before its broadcast. Then came the ‘Geri’s leaving’ bombshell but the tour had to continue and so the single’s release date was shifted three times in July before its ultimate appearance.

Given the seismic waves felt by the Halliwell departure, did Chris Cowey realise the footage that he had on his hands with the five piece performing together for possibly the last time was golden and so put it out there as almost an historical document? Then there’s the performance itself. Geri is hardly in it! She has no close ups and is it me or does she seem to be standing slightly away from the rest of the group, isolating herself? Was this how it was originally shot or had some heavy editing taken place post the news of her leaving breaking? If so, why? And if that was how it was originally recorded, also…why? Jo Whiley seems to take great delight in the splintering of the Spice Girls making wisecracks about them performing through gritted teeth. What about the song itself (and that video) though? Well look, it will be No 1 and for two weeks within a few repeats so I’ll keep my powder dry until then but for the record, I thought it was actually OK.

Widening this international array of artists on tonight’s show even further is Cuban-American superstar Gloria Estefan who has been away for a couple of years but was back with new single “Heaven’s What I Feel”. And when I say ‘widening this international array’, I mean stretching it like an elastic band as Gloria’s song was also recorded in Spanish as “Corazón Prohibdo” and French as “Amour Infini”. It received generally positive reviews with plaudits for it being a pop/dance crossover hit and for the fact that Estefan hadn’t resorted to a big ballad as she had done for so many of her hits previously. It sounds to me though like a song from a musical, moving a Romeo and Juliet style plot along but with enough beats to keep the audience tapping their feet. Actually, has there been a Gloria Estefan jukebox musical?

*checks internet*

Yes, there has. I thought there was and it’s called On Your Feet! and guess what? “Heaven’s What I Feel” is not one of the numbers featured in it. Missed a trick there Gloria.

We’re back in dear old Blighty next with “four young ladies who are widely tipped to be the next big thing” according to Jo Whiley. Wow! Who can she be talking about? No, she can’t mean N–Tyce can she?! The All Saints wannabes (check out their carbon copy cargo pants) who’d been around for a year, released three singles of which none got higher than No 12 and whose album peaked at No 44?! That N-Tyce? Couldn’t Whiley have come up with a more suitable intro? It’s almost sarcastic in its tone. “Boom Boom” was the fourth and final of those singles and it really is lowest common denominator stuff. The lyrics to the chorus are:

“Ooh it’s boom boom, hey it’s boom boom, yeah it’s boom boom, ooh it’s boom boom”

It’s not Radiohead is it? Apologies to Ario, Chantal, Donna and Michelle (yes I obviously had to look their names up) and they could, of course say “who are you to judge us and our four medium sized hits? Where’s your hits?” and that would be absolutely valid but ‘the next big thing’? No chance.

Our international tour finishes back in Ireland where we find, according to Jo Whiley in her intro, the youngest ever all girl group to have a No 1 record. Not only that but they’ve gone straight in week one at the top which not even the Spice Girls nor All Saints could lay claim to. Now surely these girls were the act that you should have been referring to as ‘the next big thing’ Jo? Two of the four piece act are the sisters of Boyzone’s Shane Lynch, a connection which actually works against my global theme rather. Three people not just from the same country but from the same family across two different acts. It’s all a bit parochial.

B*Witched appeared fully formed seemingly from nowhere and went straight to the top with their debut release “C’est La Vie”. Every year during the late 90s there seemed to be a single that would cause a selling sensation – “Don’t Speak” by No Doubt, “MMMBop” by Hanson, “Killing Me Softly” by The Fugees and now this one. The very definition of joyful, this bubbly (if cheesy) pop confection bounced around your head almost as energetically as the girls bounced around the TOTP studio stage whilst performing it. Seriously, the whole thing was just exhausting. In some ways, it was preposterous. The Irish dancing breakdown section is sonically and visually ludicrous and the “Fight like me Da as well” line cranks up the cringe factor but somehow it all hangs together and just works. Indeed, the bridge into the chorus is almost pop perfection.

“C’est La Vie” would kickstart a period of undiluted and outright commercial success for the group with their first four singles all going to No 1 whilst their debut eponymous album went double platinum. That level of popularity proved hard to maintain and, almost inevitably, there was a downturn in sales come the release of second album “Awake And Breathe” and its attendant singles. By the time it came to recording a third album, the jig was up and they were dropped by their label Sony leading to the group splitting in 2002. Their management’s decision to base the vocals and focal point around Edele Lynch probably didn’t help build career longevity with the resentment it caused amongst the other group members. Those tensions were brought out into the open again when a spot on ITV reality show The Big Reunion in 2012 reactivated the B*Witched name but they were resolved enough that they could tour again and release new material in the form of two EPs.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Natalie Imbruglia	Wishing I Was There	I did not
2	Boyzone	All That I Need	Never
3	Super Furry Animals	Ice Hockey Hair	Liked it, didn’t buy it
4	Mousse T versus Hot ‘n’ Juicy	Horny ’98	Definitely not
5	Spice Girls	Viva Forever	Nope
6	Gloria Estefan	Heaven’s What I Feel	Nah
7	N-Tyce	Boom Boom	No
8	B*Witched	C’est La Vie	No but it was a favourite of my wife’s

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m002j9qq/top-of-the-pops-05061998?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 23 AUG 1996

Posted on October 23, 2024 by 80stastic

According to my 1996 diary, around this time I received a reward cheque for £50. What for? Well, back in the day, if a retail worker took a customer’s credit card out of circulation at the request of the card issuer, they would send you a cheque for that amount as a thank you. The way it would work is that the customer with the overspent card would try and buy something on it and when it was put through the PDQ machine, the display would show the message ‘contacting card issuer’ and you’d have to pick up the phone that was part of the machine and talk to the customer’s bank. They’d ask a couple of questions about the transaction and possibly ask to speak to them in person as well. The chances were that ultimately you would get asked to retain the card and cut it up in front of them before sending it back to the bank. The experience was both exciting (at the thought of the £50 reward) and unnerving (as to how the customer would react) at the same time. Mostly they would be sheepish and let you do what you had to do but not always. One in particular I remember went ballistic whilst talking to the bank shouting at the top of his voice “Don’t you know who I am?! I’m a knight of the f*****g realm!”. I don’t know what the person on the other end of the line said but it must have been withering as the customer gave me the phone back, said sorry and sloped off. Anyway, eventually the company I was working for (Our Price) changed their policy so that the reward cheques didn’t go to the individual but the shop (supposedly into a fund for a Xmas do or some such) but this reward must have predated that as it came directly to me. So, in honour of that and in view of the recent furore over concert ticket prices, I thought I’d play a game of £50 quid or gig with the artists on this episode of TOTP. Would I rather have pocketed the money or paid to see the artist live?*

*For the purposes of the game, I’m assuming gig prices from 1996 not nowadays.

We start with an easy one – there is no way on earth I would have preferred to see Ant & Dec doing their thing (whatever it was) live over 50 quid in my pocket. Did they even do proper gigs on an official tour? They might have supported Take That back in the day or maybe that was just a plot line in an episode of Derry Girls? This was their first single to be released under the moniker we all now know (i.e. their real names) as opposed to that of the fictional characters from Byker Grove PJ & Duncan. Quite why they persisted with calling themselves that long after they had ceased to appear in the show I’m not sure. It seems a like an oversight. The track itself – “Better Watch Out” – is an absolute stinker! Some cobblers about Ant (who gets to sing the verses) being beaten up by the brothers of a girl he’s trying it on with. The lyrics suggest he might be deserving of said punishment as he then pursues the girl’s sister before indicating he might set his sights on their mother. What a cad! It’s a nasty sentiment matched by a terrible song – I can imagine it being used to soundtrack some chase scene in 70s children’s show Here Come The Double Deckers!

£50 or gig? Cash every time

Ah, now this one is tricky because I have actually seen the artist live previously. Don’t take the piss! I know we’re talking about Bryan Adams here but this was years ago, years before this TOTP performance even. Back in 1987, whilst a student at Sunderland Poly, myself and a friend who was also a housemate, took ourselves off to the big smoke of Newcastle and caught Bryan live at the City Hall where he was supported by T’Pau (I mean it! Stop sniggering!). It was a top gig, it really was! He was promoting his “Into The Fire” album that had failed to shift many units in the UK but which I’d liked anyway. This was years before that Robin Hood song and his slow decline into a world of ever more dreary ballads and he rocked the joint. Fast forward nine years and guess what? He’s just released a dreary ballad! “Let’s Make A Night To Remember” was the second single from his “18 Til I Die” album and was a massive disappointment after its lead single, the fun-filled “The Only Thing That Looks Good On Me Is You” which I had enjoyed. It’s so one paced and trudges along with Bry singing some lines that sound like he’d pinched them directly from the Ladybird Book of Hackneyed Lyrics. In short it was a duffer though somehow got him all the way to No 10 in our charts.

£50 or gig? If the gig was that one from 1987, I’d definitely go back in time to relive it. A 2024 concert? I’ll take the Benjamins thanks.

Another difficult one as I have seen Pet Shop Boys live and not that long ago; as recently as May 2022 in fact. It was a COVID delayed concert that should have taken place in 2020 and it was bloody marvellous! A date on the Dreamworld – The Greatest Hits Live tour, it did exactly what it said on the tin meaning that yes, they did play this track “Se a vida é (That’s The Way Life Is)”. The setlist.fm website tells me it was the ninth song of the night as part of a mini medley with “Single Bilingual”.

The second single released from the “Bilingual” album, it’s a joyously upbeat track which was well received by the music press and given a lot of radio support – it’s Summer release date (presumably planned to exploit its seasonal sound) certainly aided its playlist potential. The promo video being shot at a water theme park in Florida almost certainly had one eye on that Summer vibe as well though I can’t help thinking it would have been better if it was in colour and the single itself should possibly have been released earlier in the season.

Linguistically, the title isn’t quite correct. The English translation from the Portuguese of “Se a vida é” is “If life is…” and not “That’s the way life is…” which would be “A vida é assim”. Ah, you say tom-ay-to, I say tom-a-to. The single peaked at No 8 (it perhaps should have been higher) – they would never have a higher placing single throughout the 90s up until this day.

£50 or gig? I’m going gig every time on this one. It’s a sin not to.

This one’s going to be an easy decision as well. After the breakthrough of their first UK hit single earlier in 1996 with “Get Down (You’re The One For Me)”, the Backstreet Boys staked their claim as the next big teen sensation with follow up “We’ve Got It Goin’ On” which would debut at No 3. What a load of old toss this was. Recycling that horrible ‘ner ner ner na ner ner ner ner ner’ hook used previously by the likes of Montell Jordan and MN8 (and which Peter Andre would also adopt in a TOTP repeat coming very soon), this also made no sense grammatically. “We’ve got it goin’ on for years” the band sing but surely that should be “we’ve had it goin’ on for years”. Even if they’d got the grammar spot on it still wouldn’t have made sense as their first release came in 1995 so one year before this. That’s ‘year’ – singular. Maybe they were projecting into the future and meant “We’ll have it goin’ on for years” which would have been statistically accurate as, sadly, they continued to have hits for the rest of the 90s and into the new millennium. Clearly temporal clauses were not what they had going on.

This lot really were just New Kids On The Block revisited. An all male American group with five members making music for the female teenage market. They even had the same type of characters in the band. There’s the cute, young looking one, the taller, older one with facial hair, the street wise one etc etc. In the case of the last type, Backstreet Boy Brian Littrell literally looks like his NKOTB counterpart Donnie Wahlberg. He’s also responsible for some horrible wailing when he goes all Mariah Carey early on in the song where he over annunciates the word “go” as “go-ooh-aoow”. Deeply unnecessary and unpleasant. Horribly, we’ll be seeing lots more of these berks in future repeats.

£50 or gig? Show me the money!

After Bryan Adams earlier, we now have another dreary ballad although this one is also nonsensical. I criticised the lyrics to “Why?” by 3T and Michael Jackson the other week as being hopeless for lines like this:

Why does Monday come before Tuesday? Why do Summers start in June?

“Why Lyrics.” Lyrics.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Oct. 2024.

A reader of the blog got in touch to point out that not only were the song words abysmal but also inaccurate as only half the planet has its summers start in June – the Southern Hemisphere has its summers start in December. Thank you to Essor for pointing that out.

Watching the video for this one (another one all in black and white just like the Pet Shop Boys earlier – it must have been a thing back then), I noticed that the guy from 3T with his rucksack has bought it back for the promo and he walks along a corridor with it dangling by his side. What was the point of this accessory? Did he gave a product placement deal with a rucksack manufacturer in place? Or was it just his trademark gimmick like Shades and his sunglasses in the film That Thing You Do! ?

£50 or gig? Despite a Michael Jackson concert being quite the event, I’d still take the cash especially if the support were 3T.

This is the third time in the show for OMC and “How Bizarre” and they’ll manage another brief appearance as the play out song before they’re done. It’s not surprising given how long the record spent on our charts (fourteen weeks on the Top 40 of which six were inside the Top 10). This week it was at its peak of No 5 but would spend a further three consecutive weeks holding at No 8.

As host Beerjte Van Beers says, OMC stood for Otara Millionaires Club however if you google OMC the top result is not the “How Bizarre” hitmakers but a fishing tackle and outdoor products manufacturer called One More Cast. They have a range called Terminal Tackle which includes such items as ‘Tweakers Touch Me Up’, ‘Revibed Blood Worm Tippers’ and ‘Vitabitz Ring Swivels Size 11’ which all sound like double entendres to my uneducated angling brain. As for seeing them live, surely it would descend into the sketch from The Big Train below:

£50 or gig? Cash please!

My interest in REM had started to wane by the mid 90s to the point that I had very little anticipation for the new single from their tenth studio album “New Adventures In Hi-Fi” called “E-Bow The Letter” (with Patti Smith no less on backing vocals). In fact, it just about passed me by but then that was possibly a lot of people’s experience as their first new song for a couple of years was not radio friendly. In fact, it was almost anti-playlist. That doesn’t make it a poor song though of course but by the band’s own admission, it wasn’t an obvious nor easy choice of lead single which their record company struggled with just as they had with “Drive” being the first track released from “Automatic For The People”. In fact, “E-Bow The Letter” actually sounds quite similar to “Drive” so there’s sonic as well as thematic similarities. On first listen, it does seem to be a bit all over the place and, whisper it, miserable. However, there’s beauty in misery and the overall effect is…well…quite affecting. The ‘E-Bow’ of the title is a device to induce sustained vibration in an electric guitar string whilst the ‘letter’ refers to a communication never sent by Stipe to his friend River Phoenix who had died of a drug overdose at the Viper Club in Los Angeles three years earlier whilst the band inside played a song called “Michael Stipe”. The track would become the band’s then highest charting single when it debuted at No 4 and its parent album would get to No 1 but a decline in sales for the band was clearly happening as the latter sold significantly less than either “Monster” or “Automatic For The People”.

£50 or gig? Now supposedly I passed up the chance to see REM live in 1988 on their tour in support of the “Green” album. What my enthralling other option was I could not tell you but I regret it, especially now the band have broken up so I’m going ‘gig’ on this one.

Next a song that was the first ever to achieve over one million airplays in America and yet it hardly ever seems to get played in this country… or so I thought until I heard it all the time on Magic Radio* recently. Donna Lewis is a classic one hit wonder – almost. A huge, enormous hit then nothing ever again. “I Love You Always Forever” would spend nine weeks (!) at No 2 in America behind Los Del Rio’s “Macarena” and go to No 5 here in the UK as part of a five week stay inside the Top 10.

*Yes, I know – Magic Radio – but in this scary world I sometimes need to hear something soothing.

That US success led me to believe that Donna was American but she’s actually Welsh, hailing from Cardiff with the success of her hit bringing her a BRIT award nomination in 1997 for Best British Female Artist. More success seemed inevitable but her album, though selling a million copies in the US, performed averagely everywhere else including over here where it peaked at No 52. She would have one more UK chart entry (denying her that classic one hit wonder status) with follow up single “Without Love” spending a week at No 39. She did perform a duet with Richard Marx for the 20th Century Fox animated film Anastasia in 1997 that was a hit on the Adult Contemporary Billboard chart but that really was it for chart success although Donna still records to this day with her latest album having been released this year.

So what was it about “I Love You Always Forever” that struck a chord with audiences and gold for Donna? Well, it strikes me that it has a timeless quality – it could have been a hit in the 80s as easily as it was in the 90s and Donna’s girlish voice (often compared to Cyndi Lauper) suited the almost nursery rhyme chant of the chorus perfectly. Ultimately though, it was a light, joyful song that almost seemed to bring hope to a world that so often seemed dark. One reviewer described listening to it as “catharsis” and that, presumably, is why I suddenly started hearing it on Magic radio in 2024.

£50 or gig? It’s the same scenario as the OMC gig. Sorry Donna, it’s got to be the money.

It’s a fifth week at the top for the Spice Girls and “Wannabe” so it’s probably time to talk about some of the lyrics of their debut single. First off is the elephant in the room – what the hell was “zigazig ah” all about?! Well, Marie Claire magazine reckoned they had the answer in a 2023 article:

One of Wannabe’s co-writers revealed that it was inspired by a saying on set: ‘Shit and cigars.’ Apparently, the Spice Girls shared a recording studio in Shoreditch with a famous musician and decided to give said celebrity this nickname. Why? Well the anonymous co-writer told The Sun: “There was this one eighties pop dude who hated us for encroaching on what he considered ‘his turf’ which was boy bands and girl bands. This guy had this nasty habit of taking a dump in the shared khazi while smoking a cigar, so we took to referring to him as ‘Shit and Cigars’.”

By Jamie Troy-Pride, published 20 April 2023 in News

Wonder who Mr Shit and Cigars was then? Cigars conjures up images of someone whom I don’t want to reference so let’s move on to the bit in the song where the group all get a name check. Marie Claire has the inside story on that too:

‘We’ve got Em in the place’ is likely a reference to Emma/Baby Spice who, apparently, ‘likes it in your face’. Pretty self explanatory. Then ‘we got G like MC’ (Geri and Mel C) who ‘like it on an e’ – this one really caught us off guard. Who knew that we’ve been unknowingly singing that for over twenty years? ‘Easy V’ actually gets it very easy because she doesn’t come for free – ‘she’s a real lady’, so congrats Posh. And Mel B’s is steeped in mystery as we’ll just have to see what she’s all about.

By Jamie Troy-Pride, published 1 August 2023 in Features

Not sure I needed to know that but it’s too late now. A final word about the people that the girls get up on stage with them for this TOTP performance. Do you think that was planned or spontaneous? The woman on the end in the hot pants next to Mel B looked like a bit of a ‘wannabe’ to me.

£50 or gig? Say you’ll be there? Sorry but I’ll be at home counting my 50 notes.

The play out track is “You’ll Be Mine (Party Time)” by Gloria Estefan. I don’t remember this one and have very little to say about it as a consequence so I’m going to rely on a tale I’ve told before about a friend from Poly who once asked if Emilio was Gloria’s brother having conflated the name Estevez with Estefan. In my friend’s defence, Gloria’s husband is called Emilio.

£50 or gig? Miami Sound Machine or Fifty Pound PDQ Machine? I’ll take the latter thanks.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Ant & Dec	Better Watch Out	I did and I swerved when I saw you coming – NO!
2	Bryan Adams	Let’s Make A Night To Remember	Nah
3	Pet Shop Boys	Se a vida é (That’s The Way Life Is)	No but I had it on their Pop Art compilation
4	Backstreet Boys	We’ve Got It Goin’ On	Never
5	3T / Michael Jackson	Why?	As if
6	OMC	How Bizarre	No but my wife did
7	REM	E-Bow The Letter	Negative
8	Donna Lewis	I Love You Always Forever	Nope
9	Spice Girls	Wannabe	I did not
10	Gloria Estefan	You’ll Be Mine (Party Time)	No

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0023sy0/top-of-the-pops-23081996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 16 FEB 1995

Posted on September 28, 2023 by 80stastic

The BBC4 TOTP repeats schedule is missing the 9th February show as it included the video for convicted sex offender R Kelly’s “Bump N’ Grind” over which the chart countdown played. It isn’t the only thing missing as on 17th February 1995 the Vauxhall Cavalier belonging to Richie Edwards of Manic Street Preachers was reported as abandoned near the Severn Bridge. Edwards had been missing since leaving the London Embassy Hotel on 1st February. Attending police found evidence that the car had been lived in but although it had been left near a notorious suicide spot, there has never been any conclusive evidence that Richie committed suicide. Despite numerous sightings of him over the years, his whereabouts and status have never been confirmed until 2008 when he was officially ‘presumed dead’ although he is still listed as a missing person.

So much has been written about the story of Edwards disappearance that it has almost become legend. As such, it’s hard to recall initial reactions to the news but it remains a huge event not just for Manics fans but also in rock history. What I do recall is that there was much discussion about what the remaining members of the band would do next. Ultimately they decided to carry on and returned in 1996 with possibly their most well known album “Everything Must Go”.

Continuing the ‘missing’ theme, looking at the running order for this particular TOTP, it strikes me that there’s something else absent and that’s the presence of Britpop. Isn’t 1995 meant to be the year it exploded? So where are all its representatives? Now you might be thinking to yourself, “What’s this guy on about? What about Elastica?!” Yes, that’s true. Before the show has even started, you’ve got Justine Frischmann and co announcing their presence on the show tonight in the message to camera slot. However, check out some of the rest of the artists on the running order:

Elton John
Annie Lennox
Celine Dion
Gloria Estefan

Hell, there’s even a classical violinist on the show albeit she was a rather unusual flavour of that particular genre.

Not mentioned in that list are tonight’s opening act who are Alex Party. This Italo House collective had a minor hit the year before with “Alex Party (Saturday Night Party)” but it’s this one – “Don’t Give Me Your Life” that is surely the one they are known for if, indeed, they are remembered at all. Now I’ve had my say on all these generic dance tunes clogging up the charts around this time and nearly all of it has been negative. What can I say? I’m a pop kid at heart not a dance head. However, it did seem to me that within this one there was almost the semblance of a proper song structure. I’m sure I can detect verses and a bridge into a chorus. This wasn’t the norm was it or hadn’t I been listening to all the other dance hits properly? True, said chorus incorporates a deadly annoying bleeping synth riff that seemed to be a feature of the genre but tiny credit where it’s due I suppose. “Don’t Give Me Your Life” would peak at No 2 in the UK selling 400,000 copies along the way.

The first of four songs that we’ve only just seen next – that’s the fall out from missing an episode I suppose. I went into quite some detail about Scarlet and their biggest hit “Independent Love Song” in the last post so what to say about them this time?

Well, maybe that it seems to me that they’re not talked up enough as being a commercially successful group from Hull; after all my adopted city isn’t full of them. Yes, of course, there’s The Housemartins and The Beautiful South and Mick Ronson but after that? Everything But The Girl met at Hull University and took their name from a Hull shop but neither Tracey nor Ben were actually from Hull. Kingmaker had a smattering of Top 40 hits between 1992 and 1995 but I would suggest they are ignored in a similar fashion to Scarlet. Who else? The Paddingtons were tipped for superstardom at the start of the new millennium but never really lived up to those expectations. Any more? Wait, what?! Throbbing Gristle? The industrial music pioneers led by Genesis P-Orridge were from Hull?! I never knew that! Mind you, if you’ve ever heard any of their stuff, I’m not surprised the good people of Hull don’t big them up.

So, back to Scarlet. Sure, they only had two UK Top 40 chart hits but, on the other hand, they had TWO UK CHART HITS! How many of us can lay claim to that?! Oh and why does host Mark Goodier say he feels overdressed in reaction to Cheryl Parker’s flamboyant, Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen-esque studio outfit. Surely he means underdressed or is he being ironic? Probably lose the irony and stick to the straight down the line script that you’ve built a career on eh Mark, there’s a good chap.

Hi, is that the fumigators? Good. I’ve got an urgent job that needs doing. There an horrendous stench in the TOTP studio due to the presence of a massive stinker at No 19 in the charts! I don’t mean to be disrespectful but Gloria Estefan’s version of “Everlasting Love” is malodorous in the extreme. The third track released as a single from her “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me” album, this is one of the worst covers I think I may ever have heard. OK, not the very worst. Nothing can can hold a candle to Paul Shane butchering “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’” but it’s still absolutely awful.

I think it’s just the utter laziness with which Gloria approaches the song. That homogenous Eurodance sound has just been applied lavishly to this classic pop song made most famous by The Love Affair who took it to No 1 in 1968. Those Italo House piano flourishes just seem so incongruous and make the thing sound so clunky.

The performance here does nothing to aid the song either. It’s another underwhelming live by satellite exclusive, this time from Miami (obviously) but I’m not convinced that the whole thing isn’t just filmed against a green screen with a fake background added in. Also, Gloria’s backing band look like the uncoolest collection of musicians ever assembled. In short, the whole thing was a bad idea with a botched execution. Must do better.

And so to the aforementioned classical violinist. There are examples of classical music crossing the divide into the pop charts but as Mark Goodier alludes to in his intro, it didn’t happen often. Off the top of my head, there’s “Nessun Dorma” by Luciano Pavarotti but that was off the back of the BBC’s Italia 90 coverage. Then there’s Ravel’s “Balero” but again that was due to another sporting event – Torvill and Dean’s gold medal winning skate at the 1984 Winter Olympics. Of course, there have been pop hits inspired by classical music. How about “World In Union” by Kiri Te Kanawa which was based on a movement from Holst’s The Planets (again though that hit came about as part of the promotion of the 1991 Rugby Union World Cup). There’s always “Fanfare For The Common Man” by Emerson Lake & Palmer I guess which was an adaptation of composer Aaron Copland’s work of the same name. OK, there’s been a few but it must be a tiny percentage that have occupied the charts compared to pop/rock acts over a 70 year period.

Seeking to change all that was a then 16 year old Singaporean-born classical violinist called Vanessa-Mae. Hailed by some as the female Nigel Kennedy, she made her first professional appearance aged just 10 and by 1995 she was already onto her fourth album. However, it was that album -“Violin Player” which would send her into the Stradivarius stratosphere with sales of 1.2 million worldwide. The album was produced by Mike Batt of Wombles and “Bright Eyes” fame and the lead single from it was “Toccata And Fugue”, a take on J.S.Bach’s “Toccata And Fugue In D Minor”.

Now, and I deliberately omitted this one from my list above, we had already seen a version of this piece in the UK Top 40 back in 1980 when Sky took “Toccata” to No 5. This though was the golden era of classical/pop music crossovers – I think this was also when that horrible Hooked On Classics phenomenon was about.

In 1995 with Eurodance and Britpop dominating, the prospect of a classical artist breakthrough seemed unlikely. I guess that Vanessa-Mae wasn’t your average classical artist. Was there some negativity from the classical music world to how she was promoted at the time? I see to think there was. Certainly her performance here was challenging the accepted and expected norms of the genre. Backing dancers lifting her up in the air and then appearing to do ‘The Locomotion’ dance? The insertion of a sample that says “Fasten Your Seat Belts” halfway through? And what about Vanessa-Mae’s outfit? Leopard print top and micro skirt? Remembering she was just 16 at the time was there any outcry about that back then or was it not seen as a big deal as the era of ‘lad culture’ approached? The single made No 16 which was a position not to be sniffed at given its musical style. The rest is history. By 2006, she was listed as the wealthiest entertainer aged under 30 in the UK.

Maybe spare a thought for Ed Alleyne-Johnson though. The one time New Model Army member and violinist recorded “Purple Electric Violin Concerto” three years before “Violin Player” and fused a classical instrument with a more pop/rock vibe to great effect and critical success but nowhere near the commercial sales of Vanessa-Mae. Then again he didn’t look like her either.

Phew! I didn’t anticipate having so much to say about Vanessa-Mae. Consequently, the next act might be given the briefest of write ups especially as, like Scarlet before them, they’ve already been on before. I refer to MN8 who are up to No 5 with “I’ve Got A Little Something For You”. There was some debate online recently in the wake of their appearances on TOTP as to what that little something actually was. I say debate but it’s pretty clear they were singing about their penises isn’t it? Oh and there’s this titbit about member Dee Tails. He became an actor and has played four different Star Wars characters. What’s that? Make a joke about light sabres. I wouldn’t stoop so low!

It’s right wing nutter masquerading as Home Secretary Stella Braverman’s current nemesis now. In the Tory government’s quest to turn the nation against each other by vilifying nurses, doctors, teachers, rail staff etc, I didn’t see Elton John as an obvious target for them. As if the world wasn’t mad enough. Anyway, back in 1995, Elton was on a hot streak. Unlike the second half of the 80s when he couldn’t buy a hit, the 90s had already provided him with eleven Top 40 singles including two No 1s. Even that though wasn’t enough to satiate Elton and less than a year after his “The Lion King Soundtrack” album came out, he released his next one called “Made In England”. The lead single from it was “Believe” which received critical acclaim but to me sounds like a rewrite of his 1992 plodding ballad hit “The One”*. Seriously, Elton could have knocked this one out whilst polishing his multiple music awards. In fact, “Believe” was nominated for a Grammy for Best Male Pop Vocal Performance but didn’t win.

*Interestingly, the B-side of the single is the aforementioned “The One”. Hmm.

The black and white promo with Elton travelling in a zeppelin was probably bigged up at the time as a feat of video production but it hasn’t aged that well. “Believe” peaked at No 15 but to be honest, I couldn’t recall what it sounded like before listening to it and I’ve already forgotten how it goes now. Still, anyone who gets up the nose of Suella Braverman is OK by me.

Another song now that I wrote loads about in the last post and also an example of how your brain shifts and re-edits events over time. I described Annie Lennox’s hair during her performance of “No More ‘I Love You’s’” as being a bit Minnie Mouse-esque. There was clearly something lingering in my mind that triggered that comment and here it is. Actual Mini Mouse headgear! I must have forgotten Annie wore some for real! She’s lost the drag queen ballerinas for this one and replaced them with some guys who look like they’ve raided Scarlet’s wardrobe with their ruffled shirts.

Something else I talked about in the last post was what I felt was an odd decision from Annie to make her second solo album a collection of cover versions. I’ve since discovered that the reason for her decision is that she felt emotionally spent after pouring everything into debut album “Diva” and a covers album was a way of releasing an album without the same emotional investment and also allowing her to spend more time with her children. That work/life balance worked for Annie as she went one better than Elton John by winning the Grammy she was nominated for when “No More ‘I Love You’s’” won Best Female Pop Vocal Performance.

And so to this week’s ‘exclusive’. After looking completely ill at ease during the message to camera piece at the top of the show, Elastica look much more comfortable on stage performing their single “Waking Up”. This was their third consecutive Top 20 hit but rather unbelievably given the band’s profile, it was also their last. True, they did release their first album a month on from this that went to No 1 and broke records for a debut album in the UK so chart-wise, that was their biggest achievement but it’s still surprising. Or is it given that the band didn’t release another single in the UK until 2000* by which point Britpop had long since burnt out?

*I’m not including the 6 track EP released in 1999 that was a collection of demos and rarities.

So why was there such a big gap between releases? Well, after their album came out, they embarked on a huge round of touring (they went round North America four times). The punishing schedule led to bass player Annie Holland leaving the band citing exhaustion. This put into action a flurry of line up changes which, allied with Justine Frischmann’s heroin addiction, proved to not be conducive to the recording of new material. Record label issues and a poor reaction to second album “The Menace” led to the band calling it a day in 2001.

With that all said, I guess it’s time to confront the elephant in the room, the dreaded ‘P’ word – plagiarism. All three of Elastica’s hit singles faced accusations of copying other artists’ work. “Line Up” and “Connection” sounded a bit too similar to songs by post-punk rockers Wire whilst “Waking Up” bears an undeniable resemblance to “No More Heroes” by The Stranglers. This led to litigation action from several music publishers which were settled out of court. Does that tarnish the Elastica legacy or their place in musical history (however big or small that might be)? Personally, I don’t think so but maybe I’m being hypocritical as Ed Sheeran can get to f**k with his song stealing ways as far as I’m concerned.

It’s a second week at the top for Celine Dion with “Think Twice”. Somehow, despite this being its fourteenth week on the Top 40, “Think Twice” had managed to position itself in pole position just as Valentine’s Day rolled around. This may just have been a factor in not just seeing off competition from Annie Lennox who was strongly tipped to replace it but also in helping Celine to capture the album top spot in the shape of “The Colour Of My Love”. February 1995 – what a time we were all having!

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Alex Party	Don’t Give Me Your Life	No
2	Scarlet	Independent Love Song	Surely I bought this? No?
3	Gloria Estefan	Everlasting Love	Everlasting shite more like. No
4	Vanessa-Mae	Toccata And Fugue	Nope
5	MN8	I’ve Got A Little Something For You	Negative
6	Elton John	Believe	I did not
7	Annie Lennox	No More ‘I Love You’s’	No but I have the original by The Lover Speaks from 1986
8	Elastica	Waking Up	I didn’t as it goes
9	Celine Dion	Think Twice	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p00fsvgs/top-of-the-pops-16021995

TOTP 08 DEC 1994

Posted on June 29, 2023 by 80stastic

Christmas is coming but the charts aren’t full of facts. The Top 40 announced on the Sunday before this TOTP contained incorrect information. Apparently there were some Woolworths shops that couldn’t retrieve their sales data to send to chart compilers Millward Brown so the tech guys were deployed to extract it. This they did except it was the wrong data. They just duplicated the Friday sales figures instead of Saturday’s and by the time the mistake was noticed it was too late as the Top 40 had been published and announced on Radio 1. Millward Brown chose to style it out by retrospectively compiling the correct chart but it was never made available to the public other than by using it as the basis for the ‘last week’ positions for the following week’s chart. It must have played havoc with the minds of all the Top 40 ~~nerds~~ devotees out there. TOTP decided to go with the chart that Radio 1 had initially announced rather than the revised one but in the end, the cock up hadn’t made that much difference to many records with only minor adjustments of a place or two being required – I think the biggest was that Mariah Carey should have been at No 5 rather than No 6.

Anyway, none of the above is mentioned by guest presenter Neneh Cherry who is the holder of the ‘golden mic’ chalice this week. Neneh had been back in the charts of course in a big way in 1994 alongside Youssou N’Dour on “7 Seconds” but even so, I’m not sure that she had the pull that she would have had 5 years previously. Still, she had a nice delivery style and brought a certain amount of credibility to proceedings. Her first job is to introduce the opening act who is Whigfield who had the unenviable task of trying to follow up a massive selling debut single somehow. And how do you do that? As we have seen so many times in the course of these TOTP repeats, you take the original record, add a few minor changes, give it a different song title and release it all over again. Listen to the banking track on “Another Day” – exactly the same as “Saturday Night”. To try and fool the record buying public into purchasing a single they’d already bought once, the producer behind the Whigfield brand – one Larry Pignagnoli – mixed things up by stealing the groove from Mungo Jerry’s 1970 No 1 “In The Summertime” (main Mungo Ray Dorset would receive a writing credit ultimately). It’s all very unsatisfactory and underhand really but it got Whigfield a Top 10 hit just in time for the Christmas party season. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – nice work if you can get it.

Of course, party dance tunes wasn’t the only way to bag yourself a Christmas hit. A nice ballad was also a strong and proven strategy. Many an artist had pulled off the trick of coming out with a ‘slowie’ in contrast to their previous material over the years – Wet Wet Wet (“Angel Eyes”), The Christians (“Ideal World”) and Bros (“Cat Among The Pigeons”) from the late 80s spring to mind but I’m sure there’s loads more examples. Not impervious to this idea were PJ & Duncan whose previous hits had all been uptempo examples of their brand of pop rap but the fifth single from their album “Psyche” and their fourth hit of the year broke that mould. I guess with a title like “Eternal Love” we shouldn’t have been surprised. Aimed squarely at the teenage girl’s market, it’s as wet and drippy as a poor quality nappy. Do you think this was their attempt at following in LL Cool J’s footsteps when he slowed things down for his hit “I Need Love”?

At this fledgling stage of their career, there were still a few things the duo had to sort out and come to a decision on. Firstly, PJ / Ant’s hat – what was that all about?! So that we could tell them apart?! I’m not sure how long this style affectation lasted but at some point it was ditched. Another style decision that was yet to be resolved was actually more of a staging conundrum. Who should stand where. These days, the fact that Ant stands to the left and Dec the right as we look at our TV screens (in reverse for them of course) is well established but it’s the other way round in this performance and I think it has been like that for every TOTP appearance so far. I wonder when and why they changed it? Is there some sort of feng shui consultant but for people whose services you can call upon?

Next up it’s the familiar video for Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You” after the The Ronnettes pastiche promo last time. Presumably it wasn’t that familiar back in 1994 though. You can’t avoid it now, so immeshed is it in our festive culture. You could just as easily make a case for a game of Mariah-geddon as Wham-a-geddon. In fact, so ubiquitous is the track that I think the fact that she did a whole album of Christmas songs is almost overlooked. Can you name any of the other tracks on that “Merry Christmas” album without either owning it or looking it up?

Apparently, there were other singles lifted from it (either for commercial release or promotional purposes) though not in the UK I believe. In other territories, “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town” and “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) both charted but I’m fairly confident in saying that if you were to hear those songs played on radio in this country it would be the Bruce Springsteen and Darlene Love versions. Despite being No 1 in certain countries, the album only managed a peak of No 32 in the UK. Still, it’s all about that song isn’t it and it’s so far generated $80 million in royalties.

The first TOTP appearance next of a boy band that would last the decade and beyond despite the most inauspicious of beginnings. Boyzone were put together by Louis Walsh (who later found fame himself as a judge on TV shows X Factor and Popstars) with the direct intention of forming an Irish Take That (who were themselves put together by Nigel Martin-Smith to be a British New Kids On The Block). After auditioning 300 hopefuls, an initial six-piece outfit was established and they appeared on Irish talk show The Late Late Show in late 1993 to do…erm…this:

So when I said inauspicious beginnings earlier, what I actually meant was perhaps the most mortifying, ignominious debacle ever witnessed on TV. Sheesh! What were they thinking?! What was Louis Walsh thinking?! Was anybody thinking?! Despite that…whatever it was…the group weren’t killed stone dead by it and somehow got signed by Polygram. There were casualties though. Two of the original line up were ditched and were replaced by Mikey Graham who joined Roman Keating, Stephen Gately, Shane Lynch and Keith Duffy for the release of their debut single, a cover of the Frankie Valli And The Four Seasons / The Spinners hit “Working My Way Back To You” which was a success on the Irish chart but nowhere else. That was all the impetus they needed though and another cover of “Love Me For A Reason” (made famous by The Osmonds) would make them bona fide chart stars when it made No 2 over Christmas in the UK singles chart.

Watching this TOTP performance back, it’s clear that some drastic styling had gone on since that turn on The Late Late Show. They’ve all been kitted out with suits and super wide collar shirts to create a sense of unity and their dancing has been stripped back to a few synchronised arm movements and sidesteps. No more freestyle workouts for these boys. It just about hangs together well enough to deliver the song. They would go on to have another fifteen hit singles before the decade was out including six No 1s and six No 2s. The time of Boyzone (not Boys’ Own Neneh) was upon us.

Gloria Estefan does U2? Of course not – it’s not the same song at all although their similar titles could cause confusion I guess. Gloria’s hit is a cover of the 50s song “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me” taken from her album of the same name. U2, on the other hand, contributed a song to the soundtrack of the movie Batman Forever called “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me”. Hope that clarifies everything.

Gloria’s single did surprisingly well for her just missing out on the Top 10 by one place and thereby becoming her biggest hit since “Megamix / Miami Hit Mix” made No 8 promoting her Best Of album two years prior. You had to go back to 1989 and “Don’t Wanna Lose You” for her previous Top 10 hit. Maybe it was the Christmas factor that allowed Gloria to hit big with a familiar if not well known love song? She would never have such a high placing single in the UK charts again though she has continued to release albums up to the present day with the last being 2022’s Christmas collection. What with Gloria and Mariah both having done Christmas albums, all we need now is one from Madonna for a full set. Or maybe we don’t…need a Madonna Christmas album that is.

Now here’s EYC following the same game plan as PJ & Duncan earlier in that they’re ditching their usual high tempo mix of pop and R&B for a slow smoocher for the Christmas market. “One More Chance” was all sighs and harmonies but very little in the way substance or indeed a tune. In short, it was a stinker.

PJ & Duncan weren’t the only influence on the trio though. They must have been watching Boyzone in rehearsals with their shirts and suits and decided that they wanted a piece of that action. Are they morning suits they’re wearing?! They also seem to have pinched some of Ronan and co’s stripped back dance moves but then completely blow the whole effect by attempting to outdo them with the addition of a totally incongruous accessory. What were the white gloves all about? They look like snooker referees on the pull! Utter nonsense. Talk about “Snooker Loopy”! Brave heart though as I think this lousy lot have just one more hit single in them and then their table will have been cleared.

Cliff Richard is no stranger to a duet. He’s performed alongside the likes of Sarah Brightman, Elton John, Van Morrison, Olivia Newton John, Cilla Black and this guy – Phil Everly and not just once but twice. Back in 1983, Cliff and Phil took “She Means Nothing To Me” to No 9 in the UK charts. I didn’t mind it actually although obviously I never let anyone at school know this. Fast forward 11 years and the two were reunited for a curious collaboration. How so? Well, there was nothing particularly odd about their choice of song; “All I Have To Do Is Dream” had been a No 1 for The Everly Brothers in 1958 so it was a song Phil had been performing for over 35 years. Cliff meanwhile had his first hit “Move It” in the very same year so was a contemporary of Phil’s and would of course know the song. Cliff was promoting a Best Of collection for Christmas in 1994 called “The Hit List” which rounded up all his highest charting singles to date (those that went Top 5 or higher) but curiously also included one that only made No 15. “Miss You Nights” was a hit in 1976 but was included on “The Hit List” as it was a fan favourite.

“So what?” you may ask. Well, a remix of “Miss You Nights” was released as a single to promote the album which seems an unexpected choice of song given the nature of the album’s track listing criteria. That wasn’t all though. It was released as a double A-side single with a live version of “All I Have To Do Is Dream” which wasn’t on the album at all! OK, then maybe it was on an album by Phil Everly and it was promoting that? Not according to my research – his last solo album had been in 1983. There was a 105 track Everly Brothers box set released in 1994 but surely that would have been for super fans and completists only. I can’t believe the Cliff/Phil single was anything to do with that. So what was the rationale behind its release? Yes, obviously Christmas was on the way and Cliff had absolutely cornered the Christmas singles market in recent years but did his record company EMI really think he could garner another festive No 1 with this? In the end, it scampered up the charts to No 14 so nowhere near replicating the success of “Mistletoe And Wine” or “Saviour’s Day”. Phil never released another solo single after this whilst Cliff would return in 1995 with his musical project Heathcliff which he conceived, starred in and allowed him to release an album of songs from.

https://youtu.be/9W5h34PAumY

Next up is “the very attractive Jimmy Nail” according to Neneh Cherry. Jimmy’s transition from Oz in Auf Wiedersehen Pet, who was an extremely likeable character but hardly a pin up, to the sleek, some may say chiselled, pop star/actor we see here was quite a thing. Obviously he’d lost quite a bit of weight since he first appeared on our screens but was it also something to do with the more endearing roles we were seeing him perform in Spender and Crocodile Shoes? I think it’s a possibility.

Talking of roles, a reader reminded me in reply to a previous post where I wondered whatever happened to Jimmy that as well as the two shows mentioned above, he was also kept busy with a third and fourth series of Auf Wiedersehen Pet in 2002 and 2004 respectively and two hour long episodes called Au Revoir that were broadcast in the Christmas of 2004. As for “Crocodile Shoes” the single, was at its chart peak of No 4 this week; a significant success though I don’t think it ever really had a chance of being the Christmas No 1.

East 17 are No 1 with “Stay Another Day” and will remain there for 5 weeks to become the festive chart topper as well. As I recall, the Christmas chart was actually announced on the TOTP broadcast on the big day itself and I was convinced that Oasis would pip both East 17 and Mariah Carey to the crown with their standalone single “Whatever”. They seemed to have timed its release just right with it being available for the first time just the week before and with the buzz about the band reaching boiling point and judging by the amounts we were selling if it in the Our Price store in Market Street, Manchester, it seemed like a shoo-in to me. I was amazed when they were announced at No 3 and cried foul, stating something didn’t smell right. However, there were no such stories of rigging in the papers and media. I clearly was letting my Oasis tinted glasses cloud my judgement.

The Walthamstow boys were rightly crowned the Kings of Christmas and their song has gone into the great cannon of festive tunes. Although we get another studio appearance here, there were actually two promo videos made for the single though I only remember seeing one of them at the time. I assume they were made at the same time but the one I saw back in 1994 was the one of the bend seen laying down the track in a recording studio. The one that we now see every December of the band in oversized, white fur trimmed parkas shot in black and white floating about in a snow storm shocked me when I first saw it as it was many years after 1994 and I’d long since left working in record shops behind. How could I have missed seeing it in all those intervening years?

And that’s a wrap for 1994 here at TOTP Rewind. The shows broadcast on the 15th and 22nd December were pulled from the BBC4 repeats schedule as they both featured Gary Glitter. I’ve checked the running order for those shows though and we’re not missing much. Rednex, Mighty Morph’n Power Rangers, Celine Dion, Zig & Zag…it couldn’t be much worse. They did show the Christmas Day edition hosted by Take That (obviously) but it didn’t feature any hits I hadn’t already commented on and so I’m not regurgitating all that again. I will do my own review of 1994 post (the epilogue) as usual though.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Whigfield	Another Day	As if
2	PJ & Duncan	Eternal Love	Infernal racket more like! No!
3	Mariah Carey	All I Want For Christmas Is You	Nope
4	Boyzone	Love Me For A Reason	No
5	Gloria Estefan	Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me	Nah
6	EYC	One More Chance	No chance more like!
7	Cliff Richard & Phil Everly	All I Have To Do Is Dream	Didn’t happen
8	Jimmy Nail	Crocodile Shoes	I did not
9	East 17	Stay Another Day	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001mwfx/top-of-the-pops-08121994

TOTP 13 OCT 1994

Posted on June 6, 2023 by 80stastic

Dearie me. The running order for this TOTP looks especially uninspiring. What am I going to say about this lot? Even Simon ‘Smug’ Mayo isn’t the presenter for me to throw the word equivalent of rotten apples at as it’s Mr Nice himself instead, the completely inoffensive Mark Goodier.

*Starts watching the show*

Woah! Stop right there! What am I looking at?! It’s as if Mark Goodier himself had just read my comments about him being incapable of being abused because he’s just too nice and said “Hold my beer!” because he’s had an image change and turned up as a dead ringer for Jazz Club host Louis ‘Nice’ Balfour from The Fast Show. What was he thinking?! This can’t have been deliberate on Goodier’s part to look like John Thomson’s character surely? Or is it just coincidence? Is it possible that Goodier may not have even seen the BBC’s new comedy series? It first aired on 27 September so maybe three episodes had gone out by the time this TOTP aired? Is it feasible that he missed them all and so had never laid eyes on the fictional Mr Balfour? Whatever the truth, there’s no denying the similarities.

Anyway, we start with Ant & Dec when they were still known as PJ & Duncan who I’m sure we’re on the show just the other week with “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble” but are already back with a follow up called “If I Give You My Number”. This was their third consecutive UK Top 40 hit peaking at No 15. Their run of charting singles would extend to 13 in total if you only count those whilst they were an ongoing, active concern as a pop act (i.e. between 1993 and 1997). It’s 15 though if you count their 2002 World Cup song and a 2013 rerelease of the aforementioned “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble”. That’s a lot of hits but how many could you name off the top of your head? Just “Rhumble” right? Don’t sweat it. I worked in record shops selling the damn things for the entirety of their pop career and I could only come up with two more than that – “Shout” and a cover of “Stepping Stone” made famous by The Monkees.

So what was “If I Give You My Number” like? Well it was somewhere on the spectrum of poor to shite clearly. It didn’t have the playground chant appeal of “Rhumble” but instead, in places, seemed like a poor attempt to rewrite “Jump” by Kris Kross. Given the what I always thought of as a manufactured confusion about which one was Ant and which one was Dec early in their TV career, were there signs of this being a genuine problem during their PJ & Duncan incarnation? Ant/PJ seemed to be cast as the one in a hat whilst Dec/Duncan was the one with the oh so mid 90s pair of curtains haircut. As Louis Balfour would say, “NICE”.

What better way to follow up two ex-Byker Grove stars rapping than with some bland Eurodance? As well as having a penchant for song titles which included the letter ‘U’ substituting for the word ‘you’ and the number ‘2’ for the word ‘to’ (“U Got 2 Know”, “U Got 2 Let The Music” and “U & Me”), Cappella now seemed to be branching out to corner the market in dance tracks with the word ‘Move’ in their title. “Move It Up” was their second hit of 1994 to follow this trend after “Move On Baby” earlier in the year. Look, I’m sorry but I really have had enough of Eurodance and I’m not sure I’ve got anything to say about Cappella…except…what’s the deal with the rapper guy sitting on a throne in this performance? The optics on it are rather jarring. A man sits in an elevated position on a symbol of power overlooking five women who seem to be cavorting about for his pleasure and entertainment whilst he appears displeased by their efforts. Who thought that was a good idea?

I’m wondering whether, by the mid 90s, Gloria Estefan was running out of ideas artistically speaking. I mean you could argue (if you were being extremely harsh) that she only ever had two anyway – the Latin flavoured, uptempo dance numbers (“Get On Your Feet”, “1-2-3”, “Rhythm Is Gonna Get You”) and the huge, schmaltzy ballads (“Anything For You”, “Don’t Wanna Lose You”, “Coming Out Of The Dark”). As I say, if you were being really harsh. However, by 1994 her last three albums had been a Greatest Hits, a Spanish language collection and a Christmas album. To complete the set, Gloria chose to record an album of cover versions, the ultimate sign that the creative well has run dry.

However, “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me” would prove to be a wise move by Gloria peaking at No 5 in the UK and selling 300,000 copies over here and 2 million in the US. Featuring covers of songs by the likes of Neil Sedaka, Elton John and Carole King. And Vicki Sue Robinson. Who? Well, she was an American actress and singer who’s biggest hit was the disco staple “Turn The Beat Around”. A Top 10 hit Stateside and on the track listing for many a disco compilation, it was never actually a hit in the UK. Gloria’s version would correct that when it peaked at No 21.

Before the next act, and in anticipation off the new No 1, we get a message from Take That from Belfast where they are on tour. It’s fairly inane stuff only made even noticeable by the fact that Robbie Williams sits with his back to camera for most of it presumably to make him look interesting…oh and to show off the fact that he’s had the figure ‘1’ shaved into the back of his head. How little did we know of the trauma to come for many a young teenage girl in just nine months time when Robbie would leave the band.

Right, this is all very odd. A record by Snap! that I don’t actually mind. “Welcome To Tomorrow (Are You Ready?)” wasn’t an in your face, bass pumping, klaxon blaring dance anthem like “The Power” but a lilting, whimsical tune that was actually melodic and almost charming. How had this happened? Well, yeah, obviously they’d gotten rid of rapper Turbo B. That seemed to be the crucial factor in the transformation. Like Cappella before them, Snap! seemed to be in the midst of a song title fetish that dictated that every single they released had to include some brackets somewhere. The single before this was called “Do You See The Light (Looking For)” and the one after it “The First The Last Eternity (Till The End)”. What was the point of them? Was it the Robbie Williams effect, trying to make them seem more exotic? There have been many an example of this practice down the years but perhaps two of the most irritating are “I Knew You Were Waiting (For Me)” by George Michael and Aretha Franklin and “(Don’t You) Forget About Me” by Simple Minds. Just WHY?

Oh come on now! I believe this is the fourth appearance on the show by Lisa Loeb And Nine Stories with “Stay (I Missed You)” – BRACKETS! – which seems a bit over the top for a song that peaked at No 6. I mean it was in the Top 20 for six weeks, the Top 20 for nine and the Top 40 as a whole for thirteen so it had some legs I guess but four times on the show?! One was a live by satellite performance, one was the video and the other two were in the studio of which this one is just a repeat of the first time. Curiously, Goodier introduces it as “still a Top 10 record” which suggests it’s falling down the chart maybe? There’s no caption for it detailing its chart position so just what number was it at?

* Checks chart rundown*

So it was at No 8. Now given that the record stayed at No 8 for three weeks, it could be a non mover. I’ll check. Wait there…

*Checks chart for this week*

Yep. This was its second week of those three so definitely a non-mover. Historically, TOTP had a policy of only featuring records going up the chart plus the No 1. I can’t recall what the rule was about non-movers but clearly they were deemed still valid in 1994 by head producer Ric Blaxill. Surely this must be the last time on the show for this one though. Lisa, Go (I won’t miss you). BRACKETS!

A future No 1 incoming now as we get the video for Pato Banton and his cover of “Baby Come Back”. I should say Pato Banton featuring Ali and Robin Campbell of UB40 of course. As this will be No 1 soon enough, I think I’ll just leave these chart stats here for this post:

Topped UK singles chart for 4 weeks
Finished the year as the fourth best selling single of 1994 in the UK
Spent 10 weeks inside the Top 10
Spent 4 months on the Top 40
Actually started going back up the charts in week 15 of its chart life

Despite working in record shops for virtually the whole of the 90s, I quite often get tripped up in these reviews by songs or acts I’ve either erased from my memory banks or who had completely passed me by at the time. The next artist is an example of the latter circumstance but watching them back now, how on earth did I miss this uneven paving stone?

Apparently, 2wo Third3 (terrible, terrible name) were the brainchild of pop impresario/manager Tom Watkins whose artist roster also includes Pet Shop Boys and Bros in the 80s and East 17 in the 90s. His new creation were an openly gay four piece pop group – sort of like Bronski Beat but without the credibility and with a much cheesier sound. You’ll notice only three members on stage here though as the fourth member was the non-performing songwriter Richard Stannard who was nicknamed Biff and is represented by the cartoon character displayed behind the band. Well, East 17 had that dog logo – it must have been a thing with Watkins. Also a thing with him was style over content. 2wo Third3 was all about image and promotion – London design firm Form were employed to produce the group’s record sleeves and promotional material which included yellow rubber gloves (check the single glove the lead singer is wearing) and Biff plasters being sent out to fans and promoters. To help get their name (terrible as it was) out there, they supported East 17 on their 1994 world tour (of course they did).

All this promotion finally worked when, after their first two singles failed to crack the Top 40, they finally crowbarred their way in with “I Want The World”. I mean, it’s catchy and all and I’m guessing it went down a storm in gay clubs but it was never going to be anything more than a disposable, here today gone tomorrow pop tune. There is something captivating about their TOTP performance though. I’m not sure if it’s the Biff logo or the way the two keyboard players double up as dancers by deserting their instruments and coming to the front of the stage to bust some moves. Or is it the lead singer’s customised stool that allows him to tower above the studio audience? How very Julian Cope of him!

“I Want The World” peaked at No 20 whilst a follow up “I Want To Be Alone” (make your mind up!) made it to No 29 and that was it. An album was recorded but never released. Biff went on to write mega-hits for Spice Girls and 5ive (another terrible name) whilst the lead singer reappeared in 2007 as 4th Child (what was it with numbers in their names!). As for the other two, one went into music publishing and the other went back to being a plumber. Well, pop songs are all very well but who are you going to call when your toilet won’t flush eh?

https://youtu.be/SsoHUaxyAe4

The biggest name of the night makes an appearance now. Despite his huge success as part of The Police and a solo career that had delivered four massive selling albums (including two No 1s), when it came to singles, Sting was an underperformer – less sting, more minor skin irritation. Up to this point he’d never had a single even make the Top 10 let alone top the charts but “When We Dance” would finally provide him with one by peaking at No 9.

This was one of two new songs written to help promote a Greatest Hits album. “Fields Of Gold: The Best Of Sting 1984-1994” collected the singles from those four solo albums into a handy one stop shop and it was a big seller too. Triple platinum over here, double platinum in the US; it was official – Sting could shift albums. Those pesky singles though. Until “When We Dance”, his highest charting song was “Russians” which made No 12 in 1985 (I’m not counting his part in that trio with Bryan Adams and Rod Stewart on “All For Love” which made No 2). Even singles that still get played on the radio today and which you immediately associate with him like “If You Love Somebody Set Them Free” only made No 26.

Anyway, he finally got his Top 10 solo hit with “When We Dance” but I can think of loads of other Sting songs that are more deserving than this soporific, generic ballad. “Fortress Around Your Heart”, “Love Is The Seventh Wave”, “We’ll Be Together”…all more better tracks in my opinion. Mr Sumner had already done a very slow paced song with the word ‘dance’ in the title back in 1988 on his “…Nothing Like The Sun” album called “They Dance Alone”. Seems Sting liked a slow dance number.

Coincidentally, he collaborated the following year with the aforementioned Pato Banton on a cover of “Spirits In The Material World” for the Ace Ventura soundtrack. Inevitably with such a bad idea, it was awful. Sting obviously liked that sort of reggae hook up though as he would infamously make an album with Shaggy in 2018. He got away with it too – it went to No 9 in the charts.

https://youtu.be/MkTtKV04uKE

And so to the new No 1 courtesy of Take That and we get an exclusive live performance of “Sure” from what I presume is their concert in Belfast from where they did their live message earlier in the show. Curiously though, it sounds and feels like a dress rehearsal – although we can see an audience there, we can’t hear them much. Maybe they were turned down in the mix by the sound people.

P.S. To say I was worried I wouldn’t have much to write about a fairly uninspiring line up, I seem to have written quite a bit. Go me!

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	PJ & Duncan	If I Give You My Number	Of course not
2	Cappella	Move It up	Never happening
3	Gloria Estefan	Turn The Beat Around	Nope
4	Snap!	Welcome To Tomorrow (Are You Ready?)	Pleasant tune but no
5	Lisa Loeb And Nine Stories	Stay (I Missed You)	I did not
6	Pato Banton	Baby Come Back	Nah
7	2wo Third3	I Want The World	No
8	Sting	When We Dance	Another no
9	Take That	Sure	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001m6qq/top-of-the-pops-13101994

TOTP 01 APR 1993

Posted on July 24, 2022 by 80stastic

We’re up to April Fool’s Day 1993 in our BBC4 TOTP repeats but in a surprising turn of events, the biggest prank pulled that year actually came two days later when the Grand National that never was happened. This was the year of the false start that the majority of the field hadn’t realised had been called and therefore carried on running. Seven of the field even finished the race. I had that Saturday off work for some reason and as me and my wife walked into Manchester City centre, we popped into a Ladbrokes on the way to watch the race – I’m guessing I must have put a bet on. It was a weird experience with the committed gamblers all going crazy about whether the result would stand or would/could the race be rerun and if so, when. They were all to be disappointed as it was eventually declared void with the Jockey Club deciding that it couldn’t be rerun and the bookies had to refund an estimated £75 million in bets staked. As I said, a surprising turn of events. I wonder if tonight’s TOTP has any surprising turns on it?

We start with a tune that could possibly be the moment when Italian House music morphed into Eurodance. Or something. Look, I’m no expert on dance music despite working in record shops for the whole of the 90s just about. What I do know is that Cappella were Italian and they had first come to prominence during the late 80s when Italian House music was in its pomp, brought to the masses by huge hits like “Ride On Time” by Black Box. They had a UK hit of their own when “Helyom Halib” peaked at No 11. It took three years for them to feature in our charts again when they returned to that Black Box blueprint and sampled Loleatta Holloway’s “Love Sensation” on their Top 30 single “Take Me Away”.

This stealing other people’s work to grab a hit of your own idea obviously appealed to the guys behind Cappella (actually just one guy essentially, producer Gianfranco Bortolotti) as it happened again for this hit “U Got 2 Know”. Taking the riff from “Happy House” by Siouxsie and the Banshees and completely butchering it to make it fit into a Eurodance anthem was crime enough but they compounded that by not crediting Siouxsie and Steve Severin and ended up getting sued. Good!

“U Got 2 Know” managed to crash the Top 10 despite its legal issues and they would follow it up with the No 2 hit “U Got 2 Let The Music”. Cappella there creating texting language years before we knew what it was.

Nothing very surprising about the next artist being on the show as Madonna was one of the most famous people on the planet at the time. Does she still hold that status in 2022? I don’t know how you measure these things. Back in 1993 though, she seemed to have a new single out every other week. This latest one “Fever” was the fourth of five tracks taken from her “Erotica” album. A cover of the old Peggy Lee hit, it would continue Madonna’s run of Top 10 hits from the album by peaking at No 6. Despite that consistency of success, I hadn’t liked any of them that much. The one I did have time for hadn’t been released yet – “Rain” wouldn’t be released for nearly four months in direct contrast to the four weeks between “Bad Girl” and “Fever”. What was the reasoning behind that? It feels like it was just an afterthought.

The video shown on TOTP isn’t the official promo for “Fever” but a compilation of clips of previous Madge videos which I originally thought must have been because some scenes in the proper release were deemed too racy for pre-watershed viewing. However, having watched the official version, although Madonna is spray painted silver Goldfinger style, I don’t think there’s anything in there too provocative. I think the reason for it not being shown on TOTP was simply that it hadn’t been made yet. According to Wikipedia, it was filmed on 10-11 April 1993 so ten days or so after this TOTP aired.

Sound wise, I think I would have preferred a straight Peggy Lee style cover rather than the housed-up version we got here. As a rule I think cover versions shouldn’t be replicas of the original but Madge’s take here just sounds antiseptic and sanitised. As so many of us have been wishing in the recent heatwave, bring on “Rain”!

When I saw the running order for this show and that Mica Paris was performing a song called “I Never Felt Like This Before”, I immediately thought that it was yet another cover, this time of that song by Stephanie Mills. I was quite mistaken though as that was called “Never Knew Love Like This Before”. Easy mistake to make in my defence. Mica’s tune was actually written by American singer- songwriter and producer Narada Michael Walden and was the lead single from her third album “Whisper A Prayer”. It sounds very generic 90s R&B the likes of which we’d heard before and would do so again many times over and also the lyrics are rubbish. Look at this:

Ooh baby, used to be a bird inside a cage but now I’m free, I’m flying higher

Baby, my skies are blue since you came into my life

Dear oh dear. How much time did Narada put into coming up with those? 30 seconds? 20? Mica herself seems to be going through an identity crisis as she’s come dressed as Seal but is singing in the style of Michael Jackson with every line seeming to end with an ‘Oww!’. All very disconcerting. A poor effort from all involved.

“I Never Felt Like This Before” peaked at No 15.

Not Sunscreem again! Like the Tory party leadership contest, their run of appearances on TOTP at this time seemed never ending. We’ve got one of those excruciating interviews with the band beforehand explaining why they can’t perform on the show in person due to one of their number being ill. TOTP seemed very keen on this rather niche activity. I’m sure they’ve done it a few times now though I don’t know why. It might make more sense if the reason for their crying off wasn’t the usual sore throat or, as in this case, the common cold. Something a bit more unforeseen and unlikely might have made an interview worth it like dropping a bottle of salad cream on your foot. Actually, a footballer did that once. Goalkeeper Dave Beasant missed eight weeks of a season after severing the tendon to his big toe when he dropped a 2kg glass bottle of salad cream on his foot. Now that might seem like an unexpected turn of events but then Dave Beasant was also capable of these howlers…

“Pressure US” peaked at No 19.

Talking of howlers, there’s a couple in this week’s Breakers starting with Coronation Street actor Bill Tarmey and his version of the Barry Manilow song “One Voice”. We all knew him as Jack Duckworth of course as he’d been on our screens in that role for over a decade by 1993. However, Bill had been a club singer (you don’t say!) in the late 60s before his time on the cobbles of Weatherfield so perhaps it was inevitable that this moment would arrive at some point. After all, soap actors had become interchangeable as pop singers in the 80s with the likes of Kylie Minogue, Jason Donovan and…erm…Stefan Dennis from Neighbours all making the transition whilst EastEnders had given us Nick Berry and Anita Dobson. So why not Coronation Street?

Unfortunately for us all, this trend would go into overdrive in the 90s with a list of soap stars as long as Phil Mitchell’s rap sheet clogging up the charts. By the end of the decade we’d have seen huge hits by Adam Rickitts (Coronation Street), Will Mellor (Hollyoaks), Sean Maguire, Sid Owen and Martine McCutcheon (EastEnders) and, if you widen the net to include dramas, John Alford and Steven Houghton (London’s Burning) and of course, the dons of the whole family, Robson and Jerome (Soldier Soldier). Gee, thanks everyone!

Bill Tarmey’s own contribution to this genre was not limited to this one single. He made five (!) albums and also did two duets – one with Ruth Madoc of Hi–de–Hi! fame and, inevitably, one with his Coronation Street partner Liz Dawn (Vera Duckworth). The terror didn’t end there as “One Voice” was produced by Stock & Waterman (who seemed to be taking any old job since the break up of the SAW trio) and was performed with the St. Winifred’s School Choir – yes, the little darlings that brought us “There’s No One Quite Like Grandma” and “It’s ‘Orrible Being In Love When You’re Eight And A Half”. A combined canon of quality and distinction there I’m sure you’ll agree. Should have stuck to pigeon fancying Jack.

Some proper music next as we get a third consecutive hit from Arrested Development with the inevitable rerelease of “Tennessee”. We saw a performance of this track on the show almost a year prior as part of the US chart feature but it failed to make the Top 40 over here. After “People Everyday” and “Mr Wendal” were massive hits back to back though, “Tennessee” was shoved back out and managed a peak of No 18 this time.

The track uses a sample – just the word Tennessee – from Prince’s “Alphabet Street” which was uncleared. The band heard nothing from Prince until it had been a huge hit in the US and had started to descend the charts. Once it had peaked, Prince’s legal team swooped in and began proceedings knowing that they could make a claim for royalties against an optimum amount of sales. The cost of that one word sample? $100,000! Think that qualifies as an unexpected turn of events.

And now… back to the bollocks and just like with Bill Tarmey, it was all a devilish plot by Mike Stock and Pete Waterman who were joined by a third witch at the cauldron of shit in Simon Cowell. The phenomenon of American wrestling that had already spawned one UK hit single in “Slam Jam” was back for another bout with a track called “WrestleMania”. Bizarrely, that first single had been credited to The WWF Superstars but this follow up was officially by The World Wrestling Federation Superstars. I’m guessing it was a legal thing. Thankfully, this No 14 hit was the final time the US wrestling fraternity troubled our chart compilers and the whole craze petered out.

I’m not sure what I was doing whilst working in a record shop at this time but it doesn’t appear that I was taking note of the singles I was selling to punters as here’s another one I don’t remember. “Go Away” by Gloria Estefan anyone? Apparently this was taken from her “Greatest Hits” album that was a big seller over Xmas ‘92 and was the follow up to the “Miami Hit Mix /Megamix” single that promoted it.

It’s an uptempo mamba infused number and was also used in a film I have never come across in my life before entitled Made In America starring Ted Adamson, Whoopi Goldberg and a fledgling Will Smith in a very early big screen role. There’s some clips of it in the video for “Go Away” and it looks dreadful. The plot description for it in on Wikipedia only confirms its awfulness. One to avoid I think.

“Go Away” made it to No 13 on the UK charts and Gloria’s next release in the Summer of this year was a Spanish language album called “Mi Tierra”.

We arrive at the show’s exclusive element which is, as host Mark Franklin advised at the top of the show, gatecrashing a Bruce Springsteen concert. Was this a live link up? Wikipedia tells me that the Glasgow date of Bruce’s world tour where this performance comes from was on March 31st, the day before this TOTP aired so it wasn’t live as we watched it. However, the show was recorded on a Wednesday before transmission so presumably it was all just edited together after the event to make it look seamless. Surely the recording wasn’t scheduled to coincide with the Springsteen gig? Wouldn’t the BBC just have got permission to record that one track for broadcast and put it all together in the editing suite? I know Bruce introduces the performance with a shout out to TOTP joining the gig but that could have all been prearranged surely? Oh I don’t know.

What I do know is that the song being promoted by all this was “Lucky Town” which was the title track of one of his two albums released simultaneously in March 1992 (the other being “Human Touch”). Only one single from that album had been a hit – “Better Days” had struggled to a peak of No 34 – but this live version of “Lucky Town” was actually to promote not that album but his “In Concert / MTV Plugged” set which was released eleven days after this TOTP aired. No, that’s not a typo; the album was called “MTV Plugged” not Unplugged as was the usual format as The Boss wasn’t happy with the acoustic arrangements of the songs in rehearsal and so only agreed to the recording if it was with amplified instruments. So, if I understand it correctly, you couldn’t buy this live, in concert version of the track that we saw on TOTP but the MTV Plugged version? It all seemed an overly complicated bit of promotion which didn’t really work as the single failed to make the UK Top 40, bottoming out at No 48. I guess his label Columbia would argue that the album was a success by peaking at No 4. However, Wikipedia tells me that it only made No 189 in the US. That can’t be right can it?!

As for the song itself, I like Springsteen but this isn’t a particular favourite. I know some people who are huge Bruce fans though who are very excited about his UK tour next year. I’ve seen some reports of extortionate ticket prices though – an average of over £200 each with some even going for £4,000! I say again, that can’t be right can it?!

Now this really is an exclusive! Barry Manilow on TOTP! The target of many a music snob’s put downs over the years, Bazza still retains an iconic status especially amongst his devoted fan base. Despite his success in the US where he notched up three No 1 singles, his hits over here were rather more sporadic and…well…unlike his nose (sorry – had to!) rather small. He managed just one UK Top Tenner (the innuendo laden “I Wanna Do It With You” in 1982) and yet his songs are just as well known in this country. Why, in this very show his song “One Voice” was covered (albeit by Jack Duckworth) and just a few weeks prior to this Take That had a huge hit with their version of “Could It Be Magic”.

Why was Barry having a hit in his own right at this time though? Well, it was to promote a Best Of collection of course. If it was good enough for 70s contemporaries like Boney M and Sister Sledge than why not Manilow? “Greatest Hits: The Platinum Collection” included this single – “Copacabana (At The Copa) The 1993 Remix” – which is just brilliant and ridiculous at the same time. A remix of the 1978 story song telling the tale of Lola the showgirl and Tony the bartender, it’s gloriously camp but fun with it even if the song’s denouement ends in tragedy. The song inspired a 1985 made for TV film in which Bazza himself plays the part of Tony but I don’t think I’ve ever seen it. It also became a musical which ran in London’s West End for two years.

The staging in this TOTP performance is not quite convincing mainly because Barry sits down for the whole song – I wonder if he had a bad back or something? There’s a lot of fast cuts of stock footage padding it out as well which adds credence to my theory that Manilow maybe couldn’t move that freely plus the secretarial image for the two backing singers looks a bit dated now.

I once worked with a colleague called Justin at Our Price and this song always reminds me of him. Juzza used to call me Rico sometimes (what with me being a Richard and all) and so occasionally he would sing me the line ‘his name was Rico’. Ah, good times.

The 1993 remix of “Copacabana (At The Copa)” peaked at No 22.

The Bluebells have knocked Shaggy off his perch to claim the No 1 crown with “Young At Heart”.

For what is quite a slight song for me, this track has had a hell of a long life. Originally recorded by Bananarama (with whom Bobby Bluebell wrote it as Siobahn Fahey’s then boyfriend) for their debut album “Deep Sea Skiving”, it became a Top 10 hit in 1984 before its use in a car advert sent it to the top of the charts in 1993.

It didn’t stop there though. Here it is again in the wonderful Scottish sitcom Still Game in 2019:

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Capella	U Got 2 Know	I did not
2	Madonna	Fever	Nah
3	Mica Paris	I Never Felt Like This Before	No
4	Sunscreem	Pressure US	Nope
5	Bill Tarmey	One Voice	As if
6	Arrested Development	Tennessee	No but my wife had the album
7	The World Wrestling Federation Superstars	WrestleMania	Never happening
8	Gloria Estefan	Go Away	I wish she would – no
9	Bruce Springsteen	Lucky Town (Live)	Negative
10	Barry Manilow	Copacabana (At The Copa) The 1993 Remix	No but I think my wife had that Best Of album
11	The Bluebells	Young At Heart	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0019dvm/top-of-the-pops-01041993

TOTP 17 DEC 1992

Posted on May 27, 2022 by 80stastic

It’s only a week until Xmas 30 (!) years ago and I’m working my arse off in Our Price, Rochdale doing long days and serving even longer queues of customers as the panic of not getting all your shopping done sets in. I’m enjoying it though as the team at the shop were great. Everyone was hard working and got on with each other. That bonhomie amongst the staff was needed though when it came to dealing with the public, especially on Xmas Eve when many of the punters who entered the store that day were manic and had no time for any basic manners or civility. In short, they slaughtered us. Many an exchange went like this:

Me: I’m sorry but we’ve sold out of Gloria Estefan’s Greatest Hits on cassette madam.

Customer: You f******g what?! You’ve ruined my daughter’s Xmas you have!

Something like that anyway. No doubt I would have sold some of the singles showcased on this final regular TOTP before Xmas…

N.B. I’m not reviewing the Xmas day episode. It’s too long and most of the acts on there have already featured in previous posts.

We start with The Shamen who are getting in the Xmas party spirit by dressing up as characters from Alice In Wonderland. Eh? Why? Where are the Santa hats and Xmas jumpers? If they really wanted to go down a literary route, surely Dickens’ A Christmas Carol would have been the way to go? Scrooge in his bedclothes, ghosts, Tiny Tim, Jacob Marley and his chains….hey, they could have even called themselves Jacob and the Marley Chain. OK, the last bit is a crap idea but surely no worse than what they actually came up with. Again I ask, why? Oh, hang on. The ever reliable @TOTPFacts might have the answer…

Given the book's long association with psychedelics – Jefferson Airplane's "White Rabbit" et al – I think we can guess why The Shamen decided to dress up as characters from Alice's Adventures In Wonderland. #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) May 20, 2022

Ah well possibly I guess. An overindulgence of some illegal substances might explain why Mr C is dressed as the Knave of Clubs. Surely it’s the Knave of Hearts (who stole some tarts)? As for the song itself, “Phorever People” sounds like “Ebeneezer Goode” part II but then, why re-invent the wheel when the first one is spinning so well? The four singles taken from their “Boss Drum” album achieved the following chart peaks:

6 – 1 – 4 – 5

Pretty impressive stuff. That run of success helped earned the band the Smash Hits Best New Act award for 1992. Quite an achievement for a band that had been in existence since 1985.

A quick word on the presenters tonight. One is regular Tony Dortie but the other is rising BBC star Mr Blobby. This character achieved the seemingly impossible feat of being more annoying than Noel Edmonds despite the latter being responsible for Blobby’s rise to fame on Noel’s House Party. How on earth was the Blobby phenomenon allowed to happen?!

A third appearance on the show next for the video to “Deeper And Deeper” by Madonna. This became Madge’s first single to fail to make the Top 5 in this country since 1987’s “The Look Of Love”. None of the subsequent three singles released from the “Erotica” album managed to outdo “Deeper And Deeper” although they all went Top 10. It was a mixed bag of a time for Madonna. Her profile was as notorious as ever thanks to her X-rated coffee table book Sex and yet her album “Erotica” only sold half as many copies as its predecessor “Like A Prayer”. Nowhere was this dichotomy witnessed more succinctly than in the fact that Madonna’s managed to be simultaneously the most and least fanciable female at that Smash Hits poll winners party.

The people who started the early 90s trend for dance versions of pop standards have returned to the scene of the crime to remind us all that they were the original culprits. I speak of East Side Beat who kicked this ghastly movement off in 1991 with a cover of Christopher Cross’ “Ride Like The Wind”. In their wake came acts like Undercover, Rage and KWS but this Italian duo were back to remind us they were alive and kicking with their version of…erm…”Alive And Kicking” by Simple Minds. You’ll remember that this 1985 track had only recently been back in the Top 40 promoting the Scottish stadium rockers Best Of album. Was that in the thinking behind East Side Beat’s choice of song to cover? The fact that it had been reinforced in the minds of pop fans just a short time ago and had proved to retain its popularity? Could they jump on the bandwagon of its promotion and marketing campaign? Or was it all just one big happy coincidence?

Whatever the truth of the matter, their song choice worked. A Top 40 hit meant a TOTP appearance and there’s a lot to unpack about this particular performance. We start with the intro to it by Tony Dortie who, not for the first time I may add, uses the description drum ‘n’ bass erroneously. WTAF?! How is some naff Eurodance in any way, shape or form anything to do with drum ‘n’ bass?! By Goldie’s teeth!! I think Tony has retrospectively admitted he had no idea what he was talking about during some of his links but that just begs the the question why go there at all?!

Secondly, what was going on with the backing dancers? They appear to be wearing Italian club football shirts but were seemingly not allowed to wear any shorts with them. Hmm. All a bit dubious. Hang on. Is football the reason that East Side Beat chose “Alive And Kicking” to cover? Wasn’t that the song that soundtracked the advertising campaign for the launch of Sky’s coverage of the inaugural season of the Premier League? Yes it was…

Again I say hmm. Thirdly, and I’m really not wishing to get into racial stereotyping here but the lead singer must be the least stylish Italian ever!

East Side Beat’s cover of “Alive And Kicking” peaked at No 26.

Now I can’t find a clip of this live by satellite performance from Miami by Gloria Estefan so if you’re reading this after the episode has fallen off iPlayer, you’ll have to take my word for it but there’s something off about it. I couldn’t put my finger on it for ages but I think it’s the way the backing musicians have set up so they’re not actually facing the same way as Gloria as she performs. It’s quite off putting once you’ve noticed it, like they’re part of a different performance altogether but where somehow the two parallel worlds have collided like an episode of Star Trek. Talking of which, in what universe was it appropriate to add a bit of a 2 Unlimited keyboard riff to a Latino pop medley?

The “Miami Hit Mix” peaked at No 8.

The running order for this TOTP has now taken us from cover version to megamix and back to cover version in the space of three records. The second cover of the night comes from The Lemonheads whose version of Simon & Garfunkel ‘s “Mrs Robinson” was a Breaker last week. This week however, they’re in the studio and their performance has a definite Nirvana / Smells Like Teen Spirit vibe to it. Just looking at them, they look incongruous and like they don’t really belong on TOTP. Too counterculture, too anti-establishment, too slacker? Too tall in the case of Evan Dando. He looks enormous here. Apparently he’s 6ft 3” and he looks every bit of it bestriding the stage in his red duffle coat. Well, bestriding it until he attempts an abortive forward roll. Presumably that was supposed to put the watching audience on alert that something unexpected might happen and that there was an element of chaos at play as per that Nirvana performance. He even tells us audibly by singing “you don’t know what’s gonna happen next” at one point. What does happen is that he breaks into an impression of Morrissey. I mean it’s unmistakably Mozza – Dando has been known to boast about how great his impression of him is – but isn’t that just copying what Kurt Cobain did when he was on the show? I mean Cobain’s impression was terrible and Dando’s is clearly better but where’s the originality? Furthermore, isn’t Evan’s oversized coat derivative of the Nirvana lead singer’s fashion style? Too harsh? Maybe. Perhaps Evan should have stuck with his Beatles head wobble impression instead of branching out into Mozza territory.

One final thing. At the start of the performance, he shouts over to the bass player “louder man!”. Those instruments weren’t actually plugged in surely?

To the Breakers and guess what? We begin with the aforementioned Nirvana! Just like Guns N’ Roses before them the other week, here was a band still releasing tracks as singles from an album that was well over a year old. “In Bloom” was the fourth such single taken from “Nevermind” and there is a school of thought (championed by Courtney Love no less) that this should have been the lead single from the album on the basis that it’s a much better song than “Smells Like Teen Spirit”. For what it’s worth, I think she’s right. She also once said that “Hungry Like The Wolf” is the best song ever written so she knows her stuff. Ahem.

The Ed Sullivan Show pastiche video works pretty well as it remains faithful to the source material and it’s that element of realism that completes the humour of Nirvana as clean cut boys à la those lovable moptops.

“In Bloom” peaked at No 28.

OK. Just when you think the bottom of the barrel can’t be scraped any harder…We really did witness some truly ghastly acts in the UK charts during 1992. Wrestlers (WWF Superstars) strippers (The Chippendales), two acts peddling singles based on computer games (Tetris and Ambassadors Of Funk) and now this. After Shut Up And Dance delivered “Raving I’m Raving” based on “Walking In Memphis” by Marc Cohn earlier in the year, now came “We Are Raving – The Anthem” by Slipstreem. Using Rod Stewart’s “Sailing” as its blueprint, this load of arse juice was an abysmal idea that sounded even worse. Who were these berks and why didn’t Rod but an injunction out to stop this atrocity? After all, it’s what Marc Cohn did. I’ve got no words left for this type of garbage. Next!

As well as being remembered for some terrifyingly dreadful chart hits, 1992 will also rightly be recalled as the year of The Wedding Present “Hit Parade” project. Twelve singles in one calendar year and all made the Top 40 meaning that they equalled Elvis Presley’s 1957 record. Except their achievement was better as they wrote all their songs whereas Elvis’s were written for him. They did however do some cover versions for the B-sides including for the final release “No Christmas” which had Elton John’s “Step Into Christmas” on the flip and a fine version it is too.

The highest chart position attained by any of the “Hit Parade” singles was No 10 while the lowest was No 26. It still stands up as quite the achievement I think.

Now working in a shop in Rochdale at this time, I lived in hope that the next artist might pop in one day as she grew up there from the age of 11. Sadly, the day Lisa Stansfield glided into the store was my day off! FFS!

Anyway, there was much hope that her latest single “Someday (I’m Coming Back)” was going to be a huge seller coming as it did from the soundtrack to The Bodyguard. It was certainly a decent sized hit peaking as it did at No 10 but there was genuine belief that it could have been a Top 3 contender. I have to say it seemed a bit lacklustre to me. Maybe it was overshadowed by all those Whitney Houston power ballads that packed out the rest of the album. Lisa’s track was the only one to be released as a single from the soundtrack that wasn’t by Whitney so I guess she deserves some kudos for that.

Do you think that Lisa was having a bad hair day when this performance was recorded? How else do you explain her decision to wear a cat burglar’s hat otherwise?

Now I’m not sure why the TOTP producers chose to show this next video instead of the official promo for “Heal The World” by Michael Jackson. It’s a concert clip from the Dangerous World Tour. I’ve put in some footage from the Bucharest date below but I don’t know if that’s the one shown on the programme. It’s looks like Jacko’s wearing the same jacket in both so I’ll go with that. The five UK dates had already been and gone so it can’t have been to increase ticket sales and in any case, wouldn’t all the gigs have sold out almost immediately anyway?

I guess if anyone had the best shot of beating Whitney to the Xmas No 1 it was Michael Jackson. Possibly the most famous person on the planet and with a huge, goodwill to all ballad, it seemed like a decent shout. And yet I never felt like he would actually do it. Maybe that was purely based on what we were selling in the Rochdale store but I just never doubted it would be a Houston Xmas chart topper. For once, I was right.

It’s a second medley on the show tonight. After Gloria Estefan earlier, here come Boney M. Ever wondered why they were called Boney M? Here’s @TOTPFacts with the answer…

Frank Farian named Boney M after Boney, an Aussie TV drama about a half-aboriginal detective called Bonaparte. The series featured a white actor badly “]
blacked-up in the title role, and was a bit of a joke in Germany. https://t.co/qXtEsd7L4w #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) May 20, 2022

I remember Boney! It used to be on Sunday afternoons on ITV in the Midlands where I grew up. When it came on, me and my brother used to say (in a very un-PC way) “first he was fatty, then he was skinny, now he’s Boney”. We thought we were hilarious!

Their 1992 “Megamix” was the third such single released by the band – or whatever assembled line up passed for the band at that time – in the last four years. This was by far the biggest hit though peaking at No 7.

It’s still there, it will be the Xmas No 1 and it will continue to occupy top spot in the charts for weeks to come. Whitney Houston’s cover of “I Will Always Love You” was a sales phenomenon. It was on the way to being just the second single in the last six years to reach one million sales in the UK. It would end up selling over 1,550,000 copies. The Bodyguard film wasn’t even released in the UK until Boxing Day. Presumably that gave it a second wind sales wise (as if it needed it).

Mr Blobby is back to say goodbye just before the credits roll. One year later he would be on the show again, this time with the Xmas No 1 crown. What a time to be alive!

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	The Shamen	Phorever People	Nope
2	Madonna	Deeper And Deeper	No
3	East Side Beat	Alive And Kicking	Never!
4	Gloria Estefan	Miami Hit Mix	Nope
5	The Lemonheads	Mrs Robinson	Liked it, didn’t buy it
6	Nirvana	In Bloom	Ditto
7	Slipstreem	We Are Raving – The Anthem	NOOO!
8	The Wedding Present	No Christmas	No but I have their version of Step Into Christmas on something
9	Lisa Stansfield	Someday (I’m Coming Back)	I did not
10	Michael Jackson	Heal The World	No but I had a promo copy of HIStory with it on
11	Boney M	Megamix	No but my wife’s first ever album purchase was Nightflight To Venus
12	Whitney Houston	I Will Always Love You	No but god knows how many I sold that Christmas

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0017ftn/top-of-the-pops-17121992

TOTP 10 DEC 1992

Posted on May 23, 2022 by 80stastic

When I was a lad (can’t believe I’ve started a post with that phrase!) things seemed straightforward, linear even. Timelines of events were uncomplicated. Things happened then finished. Then something else happened. What on earth am I talking about? Well, I’m thinking about musical movements.

When I was growing up in the 70s, it seemed to me that flavours of music would rise to popularity, burn brightly and then fizzle out whereupon something else would take over. So glam rock was prevalent from 1971 to 1975 approximately before punk rock pressed the reset button in a whirlwind of filth and fury. By 1978 with The Sex Pistols in disarray, punk had served its purpose and was superseded by New Wave and a Mod revival. When that bit the dust the New Romantics took centre stage with swagger and outrageous outfits. With the pin up boys of that movement aspiring to be more than cult status, New Pop was born with Duran Duran, Spandau Ballet and Culture Club dominating the charts. See what I mean? Yes, that’s a very simplistic view that could easily be debunked I’m sure (where was disco in all this for example?) but I’m going with it to enable my point. Talking of which, what is my point exactly? It’s this. By the time we got to late 1992, what musical movement were we in because I have no idea going by the running order on this edition of TOTP. Yes, obviously we had seen a dance explosion happen from at least 1988 onwards (some may even date it as early as 1986) but by this point it was the movement was so refracted that there was a kaleidoscope of sub genres. I remember whilst working for Our Price in the 90s a memo coming out from head office entitled ‘scary areas of your shop and how to deal with them’. First on the list was how to classify the dance collections section of the racks, so unwieldy had that section become.

Anyway, back to TOTP and this show featured a boy band, a Motown superstar, a part of the establishment that was into his fifth decade of hit records, the Queen of Latino pop, a posthumous release from one of the biggest and most flamboyant rock stars ever, some US R’n’B a cappella style, some indie rock, a collaboration between some Manc electronic dance pioneers and the kings of Brummie reggae and…descending from a parallel universe a troupe of wrestlers! Pick the bones out of that! What the Hell was going on?! Let’s find out..,

We start with that boy band – Take That. After having lived with the next big thing tag for a year or so without delivering on it, these lads had finally started turning potential and promotion into sales. Their cover of Barry Manilow’s “Could It Be Magic” was their fourth chart hit of the year and this one was the biggest of the lot, ascending ultimately to a high of No 3. Now Take That weren’t the first teen sensation to do a cover version – I’m thinking The Bay City Rollers doing “Bye Bye Baby” by The Four Seasons for example – but this did seem to set a template for the conveyor belt of acts that followed in their wake. Look at this lot:

911 – “More Than A Woman” by the Bee Gees
A1 – “Take On Me” by A-ha
Boyzone – “Father And Son” by Cat Stevens
Five – “We Will Rock You” by Queen
Let Loose – “Make It With You” by Bread
OTT – “Let Me In” by The Osmonds
Upside Down – “If You Leave Me Now” by Chicago
Westlife – “Mandy” by Barry Manilow

All fine versions I’m sure you’ll agree! To be fair though, Take That’s cover of “Could It Be Magic” was pretty good I think although their reworking of it had more to do with Donna Summer’s 1976 disco rendition than the Manilow version. I seem to recall it being received pretty well as an unexpectedly strong version which wrong footed most people’s expectations of what they would do next. Sure it was a cover but of a different flavour to their take on “It Only Takes A Minute” by Tavares that gave them their first big chart hit. Should they have reversed their release schedule and put “Could It Be Magic” out earlier and then gone big time on ballad “A Million Love Songs” for the Xmas No 1? For what it’s worth I think they got it the right way round.

This was the first time that Robbie Williams took on the vocals on his own. Little did we know what was to come in just a few short years. Gary Barlow is demoted to rank and file status – he’s on backing dancer/ vocals duties with the rest of the group. You can almost see him counting the dance steps in his head. I’d watch your back Gary if I was you.

Despite having passed away in late 1991, Freddie Mercury still retained a massive presence into 1992. In April, The Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert was held at Wembley stadium and in November came “The Freddie Mercury Album”, a collection of his solo work released to commemorate the anniversary of his death. It was a nice idea for the fanbase and no doubt record label Parlophone always had it in mind to ring every drop of revenue they could out of his existing catalogue. What I didn’t quite get though was how they were going to put together a Best Of out of such scant source material. Freddie only released one, pure solo album in his lifetime which was 1985’s “Mr Bad Guy”. Yes, there was that “Barcelona” album with Montserrat Caballé but who, apart from superfans, really knows anything from that but the title track? What else is there? Well, he had a hit single in 1984 called “Love Kills” from Giorgio Moroder’s restoration of Fritz Lang’s 1927 classic silent film Metropolis. Then there’s his No 4 hit from 1987 which was his cover of The Platters oldie “The Great Pretender”. And…erm…oh yes! There’s “I was Born To Love You”, the only single to chart from that “Mr Bad Guy” album. Erm…except that isn’t on “The Freddie Mercury Album”! I presume it was a licensing issue as “Mr Bad Guy” was released by CBS rather than Queen’s EMI label. There are other tracks from it on “The Freddie Mercury Album” but maybe CBS/Sony didn’t want to give away the rights to its (then) best known tune.

Given all the above, Parlophone chose to promote the album with “In My Defence”. This was a track from the Dave Clark musical Time. This was the production that had already given us Top 40 singles by Cliff Richard (“She’s So Beautiful”), Julian Lennon (“Because”) and indeed Freddie himself who took “Time” to No 32 in 1986. I guess Parlophone could have rereleased “The Great Pretender” (which they ultimately did after “In My Defence”) but not “Barcelona” which had already been re-issued for the 1992 Olympics. “In My Defence” it was though and it’s a perfect vehicle for Freddie’s voice, all overblown drama and huge notes but it works pretty well. It could easily have been a Queen composition really. The single went Top 10 but there was an even bigger hit to come from the album the following year that had been hiding in plain sight but that’s for a future post…

https://youtu.be/44eEOAEC5z8

Something from the US chart now as we see a song that would end up being a big hit in the UK four years down the line but not for the original artist. I don’t recall the Shai version of “If I Ever Fall In Love” but then, despite this TOTP appearance, it only made it to No 36 in our charts. In the US however, it was a huge hit staying at No 2 for eight weeks!

Was the version they perform here the version on the record? A cappella I mean?

*checks Spotify*

I found two versions. One is the TOTP version and the other has a bit of instrumentation on it but not much. I’m not mad on a cappella I have to say and Shai haven’t made me change my mind. What was the deal with the guy with his coat half on and half off?!

Oh that version that was a hit in 1996? That was by East 17 and Gabrielle of course. They changed the title to “If I Ever”, dropped the a cappella style and took it all the way to No 2. Don’t think it stayed there for eight weeks though. I didn’t like that version either.

Right it’s time for those wrestlers! Despite the charts having been infiltrated in recent weeks by novelty tripe like computer games tunes “Tetris” and “Supermarioland” and a ‘song’ by stripper troupe The Chippendales, it seemed 1992 hadn’t done with us yet in the utter shite stakes. You may not be surprised that WWF Superstars was the idea of Simon Cowell. Here’s @TOTPFacts:

"Slam Jam" was Simon Cowell's idea: "I read in one of our newspapers that [The WWF] sold out 82,000 seats in 27 minutes. Hang on, there's not a rock band in the world that can do that. I also found out that they were selling about two and a half million videos a year…" #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) May 13, 2022

"… It didn't take a lot of time to realise that if they were selling that many seats and that many videos, there would be a lot of kids who would want to buy an album from the wrestlers as well." #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) May 13, 2022

Hmm. It reminds me of a scene from one of my favourite ever films Stardust starring David Essex which tells the story of the rise of fictional rock star Jim MacLaine. After he has split from his band and gone solo, MacLaine’s manager Mike (played by Adam Faith) plans a worldwide TV and cinema simultaneous broadcast of a concert to promote MacLaine’s latest album. A conversation between Mike and Jim’s American manager Porter Lee Austin (played by Larry Hagman) plays out like this:

Mike: See, what we do is this. We get the cinemas and TV companies all over the world to put up a big enough advance to cover the cost of the album and the show. Well, I mean that way we can’t lose. I mean…If they can pick up money putting on boxing shows, just think what we can pick up putting Jim MacLaine on satellite. For every one boxing fan there must be at least 5,000 pop fans. I mean, to coincide with the concert what we can do is put the album out worldwide. Well, just think of all that promotion Porter Lee. It’s all or nothing this one Porter…

Porter Lee: What kind of concert Mike?

Mike: Don’t worry about the concert eh? Just leave that to me. I tell you one thing, it be like something you’ve ever seen before

Porter Lee: That’s a pretty good idea Mike. Maybe I can do something.

Mike: He’ll be bigger than Aldof Hitler after this lot.

OK, we probably didn’t need the Hitler reference but you get my drift. The WWF Superstars single was called “Slam Jam” (presumably after a wrestling move?) and it was, of course, dreadful. Produced by Mike Stock and Pete Waterman (it just gets worse doesn’t it?), the vinyl came in a poster sleeve bag as I recall (Cowell never misses a marketing trick) and it would reach No 4 in the charts. I’m guessing it was bought by 10 year old boys because if not, I have no idea how to explain what occurred here.

“Connecticut, we have a problem”. Host Mark Franklin advises us that there was meant to be an exclusive satellite performance by Diana Ross of her latest single “If We Hold On Together” from Connecticut but technical problems have put paid to that so we have to make do with the official video instead. To be honest, I’m not too fussed either way.

Now this was taken from the soundtrack to the Universal Pictures animated film The Land Before Time but I’m confused because it came out in 1988 so why was a song from it a hit in the UK four years later? I can only assume it had a terrestrial TV premiere around this time. Another thing that’s confusing me is what this video is that TOTP are showing? I can’t find it on YouTube. The only one I came across featured wall to wall scenes from the film whereas the TOTP version also includes footage of Diana herself. To add to the mystery, Wikipedia says there was no official video for the song. Maybe there wasn’t in 1988 but there was in 1992? I refer you to my earlier comment. I’m not really fussed either way.

As for the song, it sounded exactly as you expected it would. Basically “Somewhere Out There” from An American Tail. “If We Hold On Together” peaked at No 11.

One of the surprise breakout stars of 1992 were KWS who bagged an unlikely No 1 with their cover of KC And The Sunshine Band’s “Please Don’t Go”. A Top 10 follow up (another cover of George McRae’s “Rock Me Baby”) consolidated their success. On reflection, KWS were like the soul version of Undercover. However, by the end of the year their shtick was starting to wear thin. Yet another cover version was chosen as their third single release of the year – “Hold Back The Night” by The Trammps – but to spice it up a bit, they (or more likely their management) decided to team up with the original hitmakers on the track.

Now it’s easy in this performance to see who are The Trammps as they’re the older fellas who have taken their tuxedos and bow ties out of the back of the wardrobe. I’m assuming the KWS guys are the two on keyboards at either end of The Trammps but are they ‘K’, ‘W’ or ‘S’? Remember that their band name came from the initials of the band’s surnames – King / Williams / St. Joseph. And where was the one that wasn’t there?

“Hold Back The Night” peaked at No 30.

Ah the Breakers. Marvellous! After the Boney M “Megamix” single last week, there’s another one tonight courtesy of Gloria Estefan. Known as “Miami Hit Mix” in the UK, this was to promote Gloria’s first “Greatest Hits” album which was a huge seller over Xmas reaching No 2 and eventually going triple platinum in the UK. I recall that by opening time on Xmas Eve, the only chart stock line that we had ran out of in the Our Price in Rochdale where I was working was the cassette version of the album. We knew we had some on order that were due to come in on the day but the record company were out of stock when the delivery came in. Ian the store manager wasn’t too arsed saying “nobody will find it anywhere else in Rochdale today”. He was probably right. There wasn’t much competition record shop wise in Rochdale. There was somewhere in the Exchange shopping centre but it was very hit and miss and the manager of the place was obsessed with our shop and used to buy his records from us!

Anyway, back to Gloria and the “Miami Hit Mix”. There were five tracks in the medley from various stages of Gloria’s career. You can tell that as they were released under three different Gloria monikers:

Song	Gloria Moniker
Dr Beat	Miami Sound Machine
Conga	Miami Sound Machine
Rhythm Is Gonna Get You	Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine
1-2-3	Gloria Estefan and Miami Sound Machine
Get On Your Feet	Gloria Estefan

As with Boney M, the Xmas party market meant that sales of the single were brisk enough to send it into the Top 10. Also like Boney M, it was the last time Gloria ventured so high in the UK charts.

Fed up of all the cover versions in the charts? Tough because here comes another one courtesy of The Lemonheads. I had no idea who this lot were at the time but their cover of Simon & Garfunkel’s “Mrs Robinson” sounded pretty cool to me back then. According to some of the online reviews I have found, I was in the minority. Ultimateclassicrock.com describe it as ‘terrible’ and ‘meh’. Even Evan Dando himself can’t like it that much as he is on record as hating the original and indeed Paul Simon. So why was their cover even recorded then?

Apparently it was to celebrate the 25th anniversary home video release of The Graduate, the film it features in. The Lemonheads cover brought the band more coverage and success than they’d ever had up to that point. The band had already released four albums to little fanfare since their formation in 1986. The first three had been on indie label Taang! before they were picked up by major Atlantic for their fourth “Lovey”. However, it was fifth album “It’s A Shame About Ray” that would see them gain much wider recognition. Initial pressings of the album didn’t include the “Mrs Robinson” cover but its success meant that the album was re-released with its omission now corrected. It would achieve gold status sales in the UK and a rerelease of the title track brought the band a second Top 40 single the following year.

The pinnacle of the band’s success came with the release of the “Come On Feel The Lemonheads” album in October of 1993 which made the Top 5 in the UK charts. I had transferred from the Our Price in Rochdale to the much bigger store in Stockport by that time. The manager there when I started was a guy called Paul who looked a bit like Evan Dando and certainly the image of Dando on the cover of the album bore that out. Paul moved on to HMV (or was it Virgin?) not long after I got to Stockport. On my first day I asked him what lunch he wanted to go on. He replied “lunch is for wimps”. I visibly gulped.

“Mrs Robinson” peaked at No 19.

Right, what’s this then? 808 State vs UB40? What the Hell? Electronic dance music meets reggae pop? Who’s idea was this? OK, that’s enough questions. Time for some answers. Well, I haven’t got many to be fair. This remix of the Brummies 1981 Top 10 single “One In Ten” came from the Mancs’ fourth studio album “Gorgeous” which featured other guest artists like Ian McCulloch. Why they chose to tackle UB40’s unemployment referencing classic I’m not sure. Judging by some of the comments on YouTube against the single’s video, people are very divided on whether the remix was genius or a crime. For me, I’m always going to favour the original.

The remix of “One In Ten” peaked at No 17. 808 State would not return to the Top 20 for another five years when they did so with another collaboration, this time with James Dean Bradfield of Manic Street Preachers on “Lopez”.

After all the cover versions and medleys, here’s a proper, original song courtesy of Madonna. I say original but “Deeper And Deeper” does delve into one of her most iconic hits when it morphs into “Vogue” in the coda. Oh, and there’s a “La Isla Bonita” borrowing bridge that features flamenco guitar and castanets. And…it does pinch some lyrics from “Do-Re-Mi” from The Sound Of Music. Apart from that though, totally original.

“Deeper And Deeper” peaked at No 6.

There’s only two weeks to Xmas so Cliff Richard is making his move for the festive No 1 with “I Still Believe In You”. He resorts to his usual over emoting performance tricks that he’s been peddling for years. I’m sure it’s just a case of slowing down with age but he could mix it up a bit. The other thing that doesn’t seem to have changed for years is Cliff’s hair. It seems to have been the same since the mid 80s at least. Cliff mate, it’s 1992 and you’re still sporting a mullet! Now granted I myself cultivated one during the period ‘84-‘86. Not a Chris Waddle but it was definitely long at the back. It was fashionable back then. By 1987 though, mine was gone forever. Cliff on the other hand was determined to keep the style going single handedly…erm headedly.

Cliff never did make the Xmas No 1 this year because of this next record…

A second week at No 1 for Whitney Houston with “I Will Always Love You” and I think it was becoming obvious by this point that this was no ordinary record. I don’t have actual sales figures to hand but in the Our Price in Rochdale, it felt like it was outselling everything else in the Top 5 combined. With just a couple of weeks to go to Xmas, the idea of there being a race to be the festive chart topper felt like delusion. It was never in doubt.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Take That	Could It Be Magic	Good cover but I wasn’t buying Take That thank you very much!
2	Freddie Mercury	In My Defence	I did not
3	Shai	If I Ever Fall In Love	Nah
4	WWF Superstars	Slam Jam	As if
5	Diana Ross	If We Hold On Together	Never happening
6	KWS / The Trammps	Hold Back The Night	Nope
7	Gloria Estefan	Miami Hit Mix	No
8	The Lemonheads	Mrs Robinson	Liked it, didn’t buy it
9	808 State vs UB40	One In Ten	Not for me
10	Madonna	Deeper And Deeper	Negative
11	Cliff Richard	I Still Believe In You	The feeling is not reciprocated Cliff
12	Whitney Houston	I Will Always Love You	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0017731/top-of-the-pops-10121992

TOTP 13 JUN 1991

Posted on August 13, 2021 by 80stastic

We’re just about slap bang in the middle of 1991 here at TOTP Rewind and I have just had my 23rd birthday. I’ve been married for just over 8 months and am working at Our Price in Manchester (the Market Street store). Life has settled down into a routine after the huge changes of matrimony and moving to a new city. However, things are about to get a little nerve racking as around about this time (I could be wrong on the exact timings as its 30 years ago) the staff were all called into a early meeting one Saturday morning and we were told that the company were looking to sell the shop off. Oh shit! What did that mean? Was the company in trouble? What would happen to all us guys and gals that worked there? FFS! I’d not expected anything like this when we were told the Area Manager would be coming to inform us of something. I gullibly thought it would be about some new promotion or other (though why that would have required Area Manager’s input I don’t know).

From the little info that we were given that morning about potential redundancies, I had worked out that I might just be safe by virtue of having joined a week before the other Xmas temps that were kept on. It was a precarious position which could change at any moment but obviously there were people who I worked with in a worse position than me. However, our finances were threadbare and we were living month to month with just enough to pay the rent on our flat but precious little else to cover for anything going wrong that would have financial implications let alone a budget for a social life. As I remember this threat of store closure hung over us for sometime and obviously was all the staff could talk about for a while. It didn’t make for a happy atmosphere. In the end, the company couldn’t find a buyer and the decision was taken to keep the store trading which it did for another four years before it was finally sold off and became a travel agents (I think). For now though, these were scary times so I hope that the music in the charts and on TOTP would have given me a lift.

Tonight’s host is Jakki Brambles and she gives a strange intro to the first act on tonight.

“We have probably the only ever artist to score five Top 20 singles off her debut album and still got dropped by her record label. You can’t keep a good woman down, here’s Sonia…”

That all seemed a bit personal and unnecessary Jakki. A case of damning with faint praise even. It was true though. After becoming the first female UK artist to achieve five top 20 hit singles from one album, she did leave Chrysalis Records and moved on from Stock, Aitken and Waterman though the reason why doesn’t seem clear. Maybe she felt sidelined by Kylie and Jason? Anyway, Sonia proved to be more resilient than we might have suspected and returned to the charts with new record label IQ Records and a new single called “Only Fools (Never Fall In Love)”. Supposedly written for Diana Ross (it’s close to being exactly the same title as her 1981 cover of “Why Do Fools Fall in Love” by Frankie Lymon & the Teenagers!), it was pinched for Sonia by her A&R man, one Simon Cowell. And guess what, it was a horrible Motown pastiche! What a surprise! Still, the UK’s pop fans decided that the hadn’t had enough of Sonia yet and sent it to No 10 in the charts. Have that Pete Waterman!

I was at Polytechnic with someone who was bit like Sonia, except that she didn’t have red hair, wasn’t Scouse and wasn’t annoying so nothing like her at all really!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6JB01AnMec

They’ve messed round with the chart run down again! Why?! They’ve gone back to having it run along the bottom of the screen rolling news ticker style whilst a video plays. I’m sure they tried this at some point back in the 80s and gave it up as a bad job. I bet they went back to it to try and fit in more videos because they were worried about the competition provided by ITV’s The Chart Show. Jakki gamely tries to promote this new convention as “incredible value for money, two for the price of one. Yes, not only do we give you the sight and sound of Amy Grant, we also reveal in vision only, the UK Top 40”. What a crock of shit! Maybe the producers thought that the traditional countdown with the stills of the artists set against the TOTP theme tune was a bit old hat going into the 90s and so needed a revamp complete with that green screen presenter effect. Maybe it did look cutting edge back then but it looks awful now.

Anyway, as for Amy Grant, she was up to No 2 with “Baby Baby” although the TOTP graphics team have it down as a new entry. Maybe it was teething troubles with all this new technology? A more wholesome song and performer it would have been hard to imagine as Amy was ‘The Queen of Christian Pop’ whilst “Baby Baby” was inspired by her then six week old daughter Millie’s face. By way of contrast, we’ll be seeing a few songs about the sexual act and even masturbation later on. Ahem.

Nothing unsavoury here though as the squeaky clean Gloria Estefan brings us “Remember Me With Love”. I recall reading an article in the early 90s about an obsessive Madonna fan who bought anything and everything to do with Madge but when she released her “Erotica” album and that ‘Sex’ book with the nude photos and simulations of sexual acts…well, it was all to much for him and he turned his back on Madonna and instead turned his attentions to someone much purer. Yes, of course, he chose to devote himself to Gloria Estefan. Not that the dichotomy of pop stars and their sexual image hasn’t been around before this. There was Michael Jackson v Prince, The Beatles v The Rolling Stones and maybe even Paul McCartney v John Lennon?

“Remember Me With Love”peaked at No 22.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHxzmUTE0d0

Blimey! I thought we’d done with All About Eve back at the end of the 80s but here they are with yet another Top 40 single in “Farewell Mr. Sorrow”. Julianne Regan and co have one of the more bizarre chart histories going – 9 Top 40 singles but only one of them got any higher than No 29 which of course was the infamous “Martha’s Harbour” which peaked at No 10.

This one was their 8th consecutive chart hit and quite a pleasant little ditty it is too – most unlike a lot of their other work. It was taken from their third studio album “Touched By Jesus” which was their first recording without guitarist and sometime Mr Regan Tim Bricheno and it didn’t do nearly as well as their first two albums leading to the band leaving record label Vertigo and signing with MCA for their last album “Ultraviolet” by which time nobody was interested anymore. I always quite liked them though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohiBAoEKgG8

Some of that smut next with a band who Jakki Brambles tells us have never had a hit not even in their native Australia. Really Jakki? Is that actually true? We are of course talking about Divinyls and their hit “I Touch Myself” and handily, someone on Twitter has already checked this claim out and debunked it:

pic.twitter.com/UaEjNUhTUY
— Will Roney (@WillRoney98) August 8, 2021

Oh dear Jakki. Anyway, this is that masturbation song which is obviously what it’s about. Or is it? Well, yes it is. Here singer Chrissy Amphlett from a 2013 Cosmopolitan interview:

“In a world where female sexuality and masturbation is still widely feared and demonized, we need to pay some major respect to the brave women who empower us. ‘I Touch Myself’ is not just a party song, but also an emboldened call-to-action. Amphlett reminded us that we are in control of our own bodies and pleasure, and there is no shame in that game.”

Well quite. Now I didn’t know this until a friend told me years after the event but “I Touch Myself” wasn’t the first song on the subject of female masturbation. No, that was Cyndi Lauper’s “She Bop” from 1984. Well, the lyrics are stacked with innuendo to be fair:

Do I want to go out with a lion’s roar
Huh, yea, I want to go south n get me some more
Hey, they say that a stitch in time saves nine
They say I better stop – or I’ll go blind

Hey, hey – they say I better get a chaperone
Because I can’t stop messin’ with the danger zone
No, I won’t worry, and I won’t fret –
Ain’t no law against it yet

Gulp! So indecent was it deemed to be that it earned a place on the Parents Music Resource Center’s Filthy Fifteen list which led to the creation of the Parental Advisory sticker. Most of the songs on that list were by hard rock bands like Judas Priest, AC/DC and Black Sabbath. Oh and W.A.S.P. but then if you call a song “Animal (Fuck Like a Beast)” then what do you expect. Obviously the aforementioned Madonna was also on the list for 1985’s “Dress You Up” but that guy who was the obsessive fan who rejected her for Gloria Estefan must have missed that news story.

At the time, the name Lenny Kravitz was new to me but he had already released one album back in 1989 called “Let Love Rule” but it had completely passed me by. Fast forward two years and he was back with another collection of songs called “Mama Said” from which this single, “It Ain’t Over ’til It’s Over” was taken. This was the second track to be lifted from the album after lead single “Always on the Run” had just missed out on being a hit by peaking at that most unfortunate of chart positions No 41. Its follow up though did the trick. Dripping with Motown and Philadelphia soul vibes, it went all the way to No 11 in the UK and just missed the top spot in the US where it peaked at No 2.

The album was pretty good too. How did I know? Well because around this time I was taking part in my first ever Our Price stocktake. I’d been warned about these mythical events that might go on until past midnight where all the staff took part and had to count at price point every single item in the shop. I’d warned my wife on the big day that I could well be home late but I think we were all done reasonably early at 9ish. Whilst counting, and possibly to stop us all gossiping about the impending shop closure, we were allowed to put music on the shop stereo and someone out on “Mama Said”. That album stayed on most of the night I think as we just kept pressing repeat so as not to waste time looking for/arguing over what the next album for playing should be and who got to choose it. I liked what I heard enough to buy the album and especially liked opening track “Fields Of Joy”:

A huge tune next as Massive Attack (now allowed to have the second word of their name included as the Gulf War had needed) return with “Safe From Harm”. After the mesmerising “Unfinished Sympathy”, surely they couldn’t pull another corker from out of their hat but yes they could. Inspired by the film Taxi Driver, this was equally as hypnotic as its predecessor with Shara Nelson’s vocals to the fore and rapping from 3D that managed that difficult feat of not being intrusive but understated and yet integral to the track.

Like “Unfinished Sympathy” and indeed the “Blue Lines’ album itself, “Safe From Harm” wasn’t as big a hit as you remember or indeed it deserved, peaking at just No 25.

Just when you thought they wouldn’t shoehorn in any Breakers this week, here they are with only *10 minutes of the show remaining. We start with Rod Stewart and “The Motown Song” which was the third single to be released from his “Vagabond Heart” album. This really did seem like money for old rope to me. He’s already done a version of “It Takes Two” with Tina Turner on that album and this seemed like more of the same corny, obvious shite. A bit like when The Rolling Stones finally released a cover of Bob Dylan’s “Like A Rolling Stone” in the mid 90s. As with “It Takes Two”, Rod collaborated with a legendary act in The Temptations for this one but even their presence couldn’t save it from being a steaming pool of pish.

If anything, the animated video for it makes it even more corny. Made by the same company responsible for “Dear Jessie” by Madonna, it features some ‘hilarious’ comic mishaps befalling cartoon versions of stars like Vanilla Ice (who gets buried under a truckload of ice cubes) and Sinéad O’Connor (who slips while shaving her head and has to wear plasters over the resulting nicks). Like I said, hilarious. Rod himself appears in the video both in human and cartoon form of which the latter looks more like him than the real thing.

“The Motown Song” made No 10 both in the UK and US singles charts.

*Plus the repeat edited out a video of “Light My Fire” by The Doors for copyright reasons.

Some funk/glam/metal rock or something next as Extreme make their first appearance on the show. Despite having been around since 1985, I’d certainly never heard of this lot before but suddenly there was huge interest in them thanks to their “Get The Funk Out” single. This energetic workout of a track was getting a lot of airplay on MTV (I think) and suddenly we were getting lots of enquiries about their second album “Extreme II: Pornograffitti” from which the single was taken. That title caused quite bit of confusion with many people (me included) thinking the band were actually called Extreme II. It didn’t help that Extreme II was what a member of staff had written on the master bag for the band’s name. The record company (and this seemed to happen a lot in 1991) immediately withdrew the album which had been out nearly a while year by this point so that they could re-release it later on when the single had peaked with some extra advertising for it.

Guitarist Nuno Bettencourt was getting a lot of press attention at the time not just as the latest guitar noodling prodigy but also as a bit of a heartthrob. To be fair, their lead singer (and normally the visual focus of a band) lead singer Gary Cherone was a bit more….erm…awkward looking. The album would spawn another four UK Top 40 singles including the the soft rock ballad “More Than Words” that made No 2 over here and No 1 in the US. For a while, Extreme looked like they could be the next big rock act.

Next a song that had been a hit just 8 months earlier albeit performed by a completely different artist. “From A Distance” was originally recorded by country legend Nanci Griffith (though she didn’t write it) for her 1987 album “Lone Star State of Mind”. Despite being many people’s definitive version of the song, it failed to chart. Then, in 1990, it was recorded and released as a single by both Cliff Richard (his was a live version and was also that which was a UK hit) and Bette Midler whose take on it lost out to Sir Cliff and finished up outside the Top 40 at No 45. However, in the US, Bette’s version was a huge success and won a Grammy for Song of the Year in 1991. Presumably that was why it was re-released over here. As with Extreme, there was suddenly a big demand from punters for their album that it featured on (“Some People’s Lives”) but yet again it was withdrawn by the record company so that it could be re-released and re-promoted. I was getting truly sick of explaining this phenomenon to customers by now.

I could see why Midler had chosen to record it. It was in the same ball park as her recent US No 1 “Wind Beneath My Wings” and indeed scored her a No 2 hit in there home country. In the UK, it would peak at No 6.

Some more filth now as we get “People Are Still Having Sex” by LaTour. This was like “Kissing With Confidence” by Will Powers meets “French Kiss” by Lil’ Louis. It originally included the lyric ‘This AIDS thing’s not working’ but was changed to ‘This safe thing’s not working’ to ensure it got some radio play.

I couldn’t really be doing with this at all – the track that is not sex per se. It just seemed sensationalist for the sake of getting some press. It was a minor hit globally peaking at No 15 in the UK.

And to round off this episode of smut and obscenity, the No 1 record is still “I Wanna Sex You Up” by Color Me Badd. So that’s two records with ‘sex’ in the title and one about masturbation on the same show. Mary Whitehouse must have been apoplectic. Just to crank up the sex-o-meter, the band are in the studio in person! Everything about this performance is so wrong. From the suits to the dancing (the three lads at the back seem to be doing ‘ring a ring a roses’ at one point) to the actual song.

Despite their success, Smash Hits magazine only had Color Me Badd on their front cover once throughout the whole of 1991. In comparison, Chesney Hawkes was on three times as was Dannii Minogue. Even The Farm, Philip Schofield and those twin sisters from Neighbours got a front cover!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Rdg4kWDbIc

The play out video is “Monkey Business” by Skid Row. I get really confused by all these metal bands. Skid Row, Mötley Crüe, Anthrax, Megadeth… I couldn’t really tell you the difference between any of them. To differentiate this lot from the pack, their lead singer called himself Sebastian Bach though his real name is Sebastian Philip Bierk. The latter seems more appropriate.

Normally I include the chart rundown here but due to the new format, there is no clip I can include. Sorry.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Sonia	Only Fools (Never Fall In Love)	Only a fool would have bought this
2	Amy Grant	Baby Baby	No but my wife liked it
3	Gloria Estefan	Remember Me With Love	Nah
4	All About Eve	Farewell Mr. Sorrow	I did not
5	Divinyls	I Touch Myself	Thought I might have but the singles box says no
6	Lenny Kravitz	It Ain’t Over ’til It’s Over	No but I had the album
7	Massive Attack	Safe From Harm	See 6 above
8	Rod Stewart	The Motown Song	No thanks
9	Extreme	Get The Funk Out	Not the single but I have it on something I think
10	Bette Midler	From A Distance	Nope
11	LaTour	People Are Still Having Sex	No
12	Color Me Badd	I Wanna Sex You Up	I should coco
13	Skid Row	Monkey Business	I’d rather watch a monkey defecate

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000yhc0/top-of-the-pops-13061991

TOTP 06 JUN 1991

Posted on August 11, 2021 by 80stastic

When I started out reviewing all these TOTP shows beginning with the 1983 repeats, quite often a show would not be re-broadcast due to the consequences of Operation Yewtree. As the old brigade of presenters began to be weeded out, the unacceptable elements we’re also part of the cull and so the shows that were omitted from the BBC4 schedules began to get less and less. As we pushed on into the 90s, every single TOTP was shown again….until now. Yes, we are missing out the 30 May 1991 edition but it’s nothing to do with any forces of darkness. This is the first episode not to be repeated since 23 June 1988 and the reason is…well, it could be a couple of things. Firstly, the quality of the existing video isn’t up to broadcast standards or secondly, and this is the theory that Twitter seems to suggest was the true reason, oh I’ll let @TOTPFacts fill you in:

This will be due to ongoing licensing issues re: using The Doors' catalogue on TV. (The video for "Light My Fire" plays over the end credits, making it hard to edit out) #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) July 30, 2021

The Doors?! You might well wonder why they were on a TOTP in 1991 and it was nothing to do with an advert this time. No, it was all to do with the Oliver Stone Doors biopic that was released that year starring Val Kilmer. As part of the film’s promotion, a soundtrack album was released (featuring the original versions of the songs and not Kilmer’s vocals which were used in the actual film) and “Light My Fire” was re-released as a single to publicise it. OK, so that explains why Jim and co were back in the charts in 1991 but why can’t the BBC broadcast a show that includes their music 30 year later? It’s because The Doors and their estate have withdrawn from the Mechanical Copyright Protection Society (MCPS), no longer wishing to accept the society’s licensing agreements. This means that the BBC would have to negotiate a deal directly with the artist to play their music and as the corporation is sticking with its policy of single blanket collective licensing, that rules out The Doors from any BBC playlists. The Doors aren’t the only artists to have left the MCPS – Neil Young, Bonnie Raitt and Journey have also done so. I’ll leave you to make up your own minds as to whether this is a good or bad thing.

So are we finished with the whole Doors thing now? Not quite. In orders to maximise the revived interest in the band’s music, their record company Warners withdrew all their back catalogue from sale, presumably to force punters to buy the soundtrack album. Then, when the fuss surrounding the film had died down, they made them available again. Great for Warners, not so good for those of us working in record shops trying to explain tis marketing strategy to customers. Off the back of this comes one of my claims to fame. I indeed did have to explain this to none other than the Rochdale Cowboy himself Mike Harding. Yes, the singer, songwriter and comedian who seemed to be on the TV all the time when I was growing up came in to buy some Doors albums but was dismayed by our poor stockholding. Luckily for Mike, we still had a one copy left of the 1985 Doors Best Of (the double CD with the iconic ‘Lizard King’ photo of Jim on the front cover) so I sold him that instead of the soundtrack album as it was more comprehensive (as I recall the latter didn’t have “Hello, I Love You” on it).

As for the film itself, I wasn’t sure about it when iI first saw it at the cinema. It was 2 hours and 21 mins long for a start (which was very long for a film back then). They even had an intermission in the screening I was at cutting the film into two parts. I watched it again a couple of years ago and found it more likeable.

Anyway, the upshot of all this is a non repeated TOTP. Fortunately, the whole show is on YouTube if you really need to see it but I am already behind in may reviews so I’ll be given that one a miss. For the record, these are the artists that were featured:

Technotronic
MC Hammer
Pop Will Eat Itself
Sonia
Kraftwerk
Siouxie and the Banshees
Amy Grant
Kylie Minogue
Cher
The Doors

If you’re annoyed about missing out on seeing any of the names listed above, take solace in the fact that you have also missed out on having to endure Anthea Turner presenting and get this….it was her last ever TOTP appearance! Hurray!

The decision to axe Anthea would be the tip of the iceberg in terms of changes to the show in 1991. The ‘year zero’ revamp was coming but before then even, some changes were afoot. We’ve already had the truncated chart rundown which doesn’t include records going down, the compressed Breakers section with up to five acts concertinaed into under a minute and a half and now another change that would have been heresy back in the programme’s 80s heyday. A record that isn’t even in the Top 40 opening the show! Apparently this was a regular practice in the 70s but since 1980 the criteria for appearing on the show had been inflexible one of which was your record had to be in the Top 40. Suddenly though, in June 1991, that didn’t matter as here were Northside with a very clear graphic announcing that their single “Take 5” was at No 41 in the charts. None of this made any sense. Even host Mark Goodier doesn’t seem to have got the policy change memo as he says in his intro…

“Good evening and welcome to TOTP featuring the world’s most exciting chart – the BBC UK Top 40”

…and then he introduces an act whose single is outside of that ‘most exciting chart’. Just weird. Who knows what negotiations and deals went down behind closed doors to make this happen but it didn’t really do Northside much good as the single would only rise one place in next week’s chart before falling away completely. At least they could say it was a bona fide Top 40 hit I guess. Of course, the band already one of these to their name as “My Rising Star” had made it all the way to the giddy heights of No 32 the previous year.

The band were part of the Factory Records roster of artists and did indeed hail from Manchester (Moston to be precise) and I remember there being some fuss about them when their only album “Chicken Rhythms” was released later in June. It did quite well as I recall (Wikipedia tells me it got to No 19 in the album chart) whilst “Take 5” was a pretty funky tune to be fair. I like that, despite the privilege of being on TOTP without a Top 40 hit, the band had a dress down Thursday approach to being on TOTP in their choice of outfits. On the other end of the spectrum and also on this show were Marillion and that led to this little Twitter spat when the repeat went out on BBC4:

Always the professionals you know…and who are Northside?😄#totp #marillion
— Marillion (@MarillionOnline) July 30, 2021

Come on lads. Play nicely.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHfcQm-VPh8

Oh, by the way, before we get any further, this TOTP was originally broadcast on my 23rd birthday so Happy Birthday to me! I am now 53. This can’t be right surely? Something else which wasn’t right was the fact that rather than doing all his links in and amongst the studio audience, for some of them (those for promo videos and not studio performances) Mark Goodier seems to have been green screened! In this intro to “Jealousy” by Pet Shop Boys he does it against a backdrop of Neil and Chris before being zapped off screen Star Trek like. Not another new innovation?

This was the fourth and final single to be released from the duo’s album “Behaviour” and for me was the best at the time (I may have been swayed by “Being Boring” in later life though). A huge, sweeping, epic ballad with an orchestral outro which was perfectly at odds with Tennant’s dead pan vocals, it should have been a much bigger hit than its No 12 peak. Maybe if it hadn’t been the last track to be released as a single? Apparently it was the first proper song that Neil and Chris wrote together but they waited for years before recording it for an album as they wanted Ennio Morricone to score the orchestral part but they had to settle for Harold “Axel F” Faltermeyer in the end.

I seem to recall there was a guy working at our shop around this time who was going through some relationship problems with his boyfriend and who would play this track a lot on the store stereo. I’m not sure that helped to be honest.

The aforementioned Marillion next though it was a Fish-less version of the band by now. “Cover My Eyes (Pain and Heaven)” was the lead single from their sixth studio album “Holidays In Eden” and guess what? It wasn’t in the Top 40 at the time either! Yes, like Northside earlier, the TOTP producers gave the band a slot anyway. What was going on?! Makes their snarky tweet about who were Northside seem a bit lacking in credibility seeing as they were benefitting from an unusual TOTP appearance just like them. And they were even further down the charts at No 42 that week. In fairness, it did make it all the way to No 34 in the end but even so.

So who was it that took over from Fish? Well it was Steve Hogarth of course though I had to do a double take to make sure that wasn’t cockney comedian Micky Flannagan up there at first. As for the song, I don’t remember it at all but that’s hardly surprising as it meanders along going nowhere for its entire length.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hVAXAL_yFE

Goodier is back with his Star Trek transported trick again next as he introduces Salt ‘N’ Pepa with “Do You Want Me”. His intro is not quite factually correct though:

“Do you remember the 1988 hit “Push It” by Salt ‘N’ Pepa. Well in fact they haven’t really been in the charts for about three years now they’re back though…”

Well actually Mark, since “Push It” they’d had three Top 40 hits the last of which was “Expression” in April 1990 so not really three years then. OK, “Expression” only just sneaked in at No 40 but as we have seen tonight, you could get on TOTP with less of a hit in 1991.

“Do You Want Me” would go all the way to No 5 but I have to say I don’t really remember it. If I think about Salt ‘N’ Pepa and 1991, the only single that comes to mind is “Let’s Talk About Sex” which was a No 2 hit later in the year. Both tracks were from their “Blacks’ Magic” album which despite the success of its singles was largely ignored in the UK. That was largely due to the fact that their record label released a Greatest Hits album in October which was a healthy seller peaking at No 6.

Another Madonna re-release next as, off the back of her whopper of a seller Best Of album “The Immaculate Collection”, “Holiday” was back in the charts. Unbelievably, this was the third time the song had been a hit in the UK! Originally it made No 6 in 1984, then No 2 when re-released in 1985 (kept off the top by her own “Into The Groove” single) and finally in 1991 when it peaked at No 5. So, at the risk of sounding like Craig David, does that make the 1991 entry a re-re-release?

Look, I’ll have covered this song twice before in my 80s blog (https://80spop.wordpress.com) so I don’t propose to spend too long on this one but I have to say I don’t really understand why record buyers would have forked out for this one for a third time especially as so many people had already bough the “The Immaculate Collection” album with it on over Xmas. Was it a rare mix of it? Or were there loads of Madonna completists out there? Or could it have been for this reason courtesy of @TOTPFacts:

This third issue of "Holiday" was released to tie-in with compilation "The Immaculate Collection". As well as the 7" you could also buy CD EP "The Holiday Collection", which included 3 Madonna hits left off the LP: "True Blue". "Who's That Girl" and "Causing A Commotion". #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) July 30, 2021

You’d have to be a real obsessive super fan to buy it just for that though surely?

It’s that nice Kenny Thomas now with his second and biggest ever hit “Thinking About Your Love”. I’ve said in previous posts that back in 1991, I really had a problem with Kenny and it seems irrational to me now. Yes, I thought this music was a bit on the bland side but there have been loads of artists down the years that have fallen on deaf ears with me and I didn’t despise them nearly as much as I did Kenny. From what I can make out he seems a thoroughly decent chap as well but boy did he get up my nose back then. Let me watch this performance again and see if it triggers some of those feelings of loathing…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1V1jT84kmV0

…nope. Nothing there to cause such an extreme reaction in me. His backing vocalist looks a bit like TV presenter June Sarpong. Can’t be can it?

“Thinking About Your Love” peaked at No 4.

Some Breakers now starting with the first of two bands on tonight with the US spelling of the word ‘colour’ in their name. “Solace Of You” by Living Color is another one I don’t recall but listening to it now, it has a world music feel to it and a different sound altogether to hear previous hit “Love Rears Its Ugly Head”. Sort of like Paul Simon meets Eagle-Eye Cherry? Maybe not. Presumably they had to make do with a Breakers slot on the show rather than a studio performance despite being 1 and 2 places higher in the charts than Northside and Marillion respectively due to their touring commitments that Mark Goodier outlines. They had the last laugh though as “Solace Of You” was a bigger hit than either “Take 5” or “Cover My Eyes (Pain and Heaven)” when it peaked at No 33.

Another Gloria Estefan single! Wasn’t she just on the other week with a song called “Seal Our Fate”? Well, she’s back again with another track from her “Into The Light” album called “Remember Me With Love”. I really couldn’t tell you how this one went and even after watching it on this TOTP I can’t as the clip cuts off before she’s even got to the chorus! This compressed Breakers section really was pointless, talking of which this single would surely be a jackpot winning answer on Pointless if the subject was Gloria Estefan Singles.

“Remember Me with Love” peaked at No 22.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHxzmUTE0d0

While Michael Bublé was learning to shave, Harry Connick Jr was the guy being talked of as the natural successor to Frank Sinatra in the crooning stakes. He came to global recognition back in 1990 when his album “We Are In Love” tore down the traditional musical genre walls and became a mainstream hit despite essentially being a jazz album. My wife was quite taken with him at the time and had that album. Around the same time he had recorded the music for the Billy Crystal /Meg Ryan film When Harry Met Sally from which this single “It Had To Be You” was taken. The soundtrack album was a also a massive success and earned Connick a Grammy Award for Best Jazz Male Vocal Performance.

There was such a rush of material from Harry at this time that it all got a bit confusing. In September of 1991 he released “Blue Light, Red Light” which was a big band album and was also a sizeable success whilst he also contributed a song to the soundtrack of The Godfather Part III. The albums kept on coming with one released every year throughout the 90s pretty much although that initial buzz about him was never really recovered. Effortlessly cool, Connick Jr ran a career in acting parallel to his music making appearing in more than 20 films but I think I liked him best as tail gunner Clay in Memphis Belle. Eat your heart out Bublé.

Innuendo songs – it’s a niche genre but it does exist. I’m thinking “Love Resurrection”. by Alison Moyet and of course “Turning Japanese” by The Vapours but perhaps the biggest of them all was “I Touch Myself” by Divinyls (as with Eurythmics, there was no ‘The’). Largely unknown outside of their native Australia (where they were a much bigger deal), their only song to make any inroads anywhere else in the world was their homage to masturbation. It was written by Tom Kelly and Billy Steinberg who had form when it came to provocative pop songs – they also wrote “Like A Virgin” for Madonna.

I thought this was a great pop song. Immediately catchy but also having an angle with a great vocal delivery from Christina Amphlett. One of the best one hit wonders of the decade. Sadly Christina died in 2013 of breast cancer but her legacy lived on with the founding of the I Touch Myself Project which was created in her honour with a mission to create educational forums to remind women to check their breasts regularly.

“I Touch Myself” peaked at No 10 in the UK and No 4 in the US.

Ah, the very wonderful Kirsty MacColl is back in the charts. Last seen exactly two years prior to this with her version of “Days” by The Kinks, this would turn out to be her last ever Top 40 hit if you discount all of the re-releases of “Fairytale of New York”. Her lack of chart success remains a mystery and travesty. “Walking Down Madison” was the lead single from her “Electric Landlady” album (see what she did there?) and was seen as a change in direction for Kirsty with its hip/hop feel and extensive use of rapping in it. The guitar part in it reminds me of Happy Mondays and that influence would make sense as Kirsty supplied backing vocals for their hit “Hallelujah”. However, it was actually written by Johnny Marr and was one of the first songs that he wrote after the break up of The Smiths. Despite the multitude on stage here with Kirsty, I don’t think Johnny was one of them but is that Roland Rivron on bongos?

When Kirsty died in 2001, I was on a Xmas night out from work and recall seeing her face on the news on a TV screen in an electrical shop window as I walked past. I remember thinking why is Kirsty MacColl on the news? It was tragic news.

Oh and by the way TOTP graphics team, you spell her surname MacColl not McColl. Show some respect.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DhGf_yz2hU

A brand new No 1! Cher has finally gone after what seems like ages (mind you if we thought her time at the top was a long one, watch out for Bryan Adams in a few weeks time!). The ‘Badd’ news is that it’s been replaced by that horrible “I Wanna Sex You Up” song by Color Me Badd.

The other week I commented on the fact that two of the guys in the band looked like George Michael and Kenny G. I wasn’t the only one. Here’s Beavis and Butthead making the same connection (maybe I was just regurgitating their take on it subliminally) and they’ve added another name too…

The play out video is “Shiny Happy People” by REM again. I think it’s the third time it’s been on the show and it’s that level of overkill that quickly turned a lot of people off it. I was one of them. Parent album “Out Of Time” was played to death in the Our Price I worked in and “Shiny Happy People” was never off the radio. It became one of those songs that you couldn’t listen to any more after having already reached saturation point. Other songs that triggered me like this would be “Bohemian Rhapsody” by Queen and “Tainted Love” by Soft Cell (which was also back in the charts in 1991!). Even the band themselves tired of it quickly and avoided playing it live whilst it was not included in the track listing for their 2003 Warner Brothers greatest hits “In Time: The Best Of REM”.

It’s not that REM were always suffering for their art with sombre, melancholic songs though. “Stand” from 1989’s “Green” album is a great pop tune full of hooks whilst 1986’s “Fall On Me” has a wonderful pop structure and melody. And yet somehow, for many of us, “Shiny Happy People” seemed to cross a line. Maybe it’s due a bit of a revisit.

For posterity’s sake, I include the chart run down below:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZc5aZud8qk

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Northside	Take 5	No but a pretty nifty tune all the same
2	Pet Shop Boys	Jealousy	No but it’s on my Pop Art Best Of CD of theirs
3	Marillion	Cover My Eyes (Pain and Heaven)	Cover My Ears (Pain and Hell) more like – no
4	Salt ‘N’ Pepa	Do You Want Me	Nope
5	Madonna	Holiday	No but it’s on my Immaculate Collection CD
6	Kenny Thomas	Thinking About You	No
7	Living Color	Solace Of You	Negative
8	Gloria Estefan	Remember Me With Love	Uh-uh
9	Harry Connick Jr	It Had To Be You	No but my wife had his We Are In Love album
10	Divinyls	I Touch Myself	No but I easily could have done
11	Kirsty MacColl	Walking Down Madison	This one is on the singles box though I think my wife bought it
12	Color Me Badd	I Wanna Sex You Up	Away with you!
13	REM	Shiny Happy People	Nah

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000y8wx/top-of-the-pops-06061991

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My memories of 90s chart music

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