TOTP 1991 – the epilogue

And there goes 1991! Phew! So, was it a case of “Thank God that’s all over” or was it that we were all left wanting more? Let’s be honest, it’s option one isn’t it? As ever when I approach the next year of TOTP repeats, my optimism got the better of me and I came out the reviews thinking “it can’t have been as bad as all that surely?” and, as ever, I was wrong. In my defence, after the year of ‘Madchester’ that was 1990, was it unreasonable to have anticipated that 1991 would see a continuation of the dominance of the indie dance scene and all the cultural invention it bought? Sadly, the two biggest names of that movement were conspicuous by their absence. Both Happy Mondays and The Stone Roses were in a state of paralysis as they attempted to follow up on the huge events that were their iconic albums “Pills ‘n’ Thrills And Bellyaches” and “The Stone Roses . The latter were banjaxed by legal issues as they sought to disentangle themselves from their Silvertone recording contract and the Mondays? Well, they were hanging out with Ronnie Biggs in Brazil and doing a lot of drugs weren’t they?

Into the vacancy they created strode indie rock bands like Blur, Jesus Jones and Ride who looked the part but were they really just signings by major labels looking to jump on a bandwagon whose wheels had already come off? By the end of the year, a new dominant strain of rock music would arrive from Seattle in America. The era of grunge was upon us.

Dance music was still in the ascendancy with most of the tunes crossing over into the charts being rave anthems by the likes of The Prodigy, Bizarre Inc, Altern-8 and SL2. Meanwhile, some of the stars of the previous decade made a come back like Paul Young and a trimmed down OMD. Surely the biggest return of an act we’d first seen in the 80s though was by Simply Red who bagged the year’s biggest selling album in “Stars”.

As for TOTP, 1991 was a year of huge change with the ‘year zero’ revamp culling all those familiar Radio 1 DJ presenters in one fell swoop, replacing them with fresh faced youngsters we’d never seen before. A new live vocal performance policy was introduced to mixed results while the whole shebang was moved lock,stock and barrel, relocating from BBC Television Centre in London to BBC Elstree Centre in Borehamwood. It all took some getting used to and judging by the shows I’ve already reviewed, the new changes weren’t an immediate hit.

As usual with these end of year reviews, I like to remind myself of the songs that topped the charts to see if there is were any trends behind the sales and as ever, nothing really seems to make much sense.

Chart date
(week ending)
SongArtist(s)
5 JanuaryBring Your Daughter… to the SlaughterIron Maiden
12 January
19 JanuarySadness (Part I)Enigma
26 JanuaryInnuendoQueen
2 February3 a.m. EternalThe KLF
9 February
16 FebruaryDo the BartmanThe Simpsons
23 February
2 March
9 MarchShould I Stay or Should I GoThe Clash
16 March
23 March“The Stonk”Hale and Pace
30 MarchThe One and OnlyChesney Hawkes
6 April
13 April
20 April
27 April
4 MayThe Shoop Shoop Song (It’s in His Kiss)Cher
11 May
18 May
25 May
1 June
8 JuneI Wanna Sex You UpColor Me Badd
15 June
22 June
29 JuneAny Dream Will DoJason Donovan
6 July
13 July(Everything I Do) I Do It for YouBryan Adams
20 July
27 July
3 August
10 August
17 August
24 August
31 August
7 September
14 September
21 September
28 September
5 October
12 October
19 October
26 October
2 NovemberThe FlyU2
9 NovemberDizzyVic Reeves and The Wonder Stuff
16 November
23 NovemberBlack or WhiteMichael Jackson
30 November
7 DecemberDon’t Let the Sun Go Down on MeGeorge Michael and Elton John
14 December
21 DecemberBohemian Rhapsody / These Are the Days of Our LivesQueen

17 songs had travelled to the summit of the charts. Of them, I would say they broke down like this:

  • 6 by established stars (Queen twice, Michael Jackson, Cher, U2, George Michael and Elton John)
  • 3 by ‘teen’ sensations (Chesney Hawkes, Jason Donovan, Color Me Badd)
  • 2 by ‘new’ artists with a ‘new’ sound (Enigma, The KLF)
  • 2 x novelty records (The Simpsons, Vic Reeves and The Wonder Stuff)
  • 1 by a band with a loyal fanbase that manipulated the release schedules (Iron Maiden)
  • 1 x TV advert tie in (The Clash)
  • 1 x charity record (Hale & Pace)…
  • …and 1 by Bryan Adams.

Some may argue with my categories and you could swap some of the artists around of course. Was “Dizzy” an actual novelty record? Were Color Me Badd really a teen sensation? I had to draw the line somewhere though. Of those 17, I bought two and one of those was by mistake – I’ll let you work out / guess which ones they were. Discounting novelty and charity records and with the exception of Enigma, Iron Maiden and The KLF (and at a pinch U2), it was all very mainstream. Nothing ever seemed to change that much when it came to the really big hit singles. Maybe grunge will change all that in 1992…

Hits We Missed

During these reviews of the year in my other blog TOTP Rewind – the 80s, a lot of the entries in this section were songs and artists that had made it onto the show but those shows were not repeated by the BBC for reasons of taste surrounding hosts that were totally unpalatable today or, in the case of Mike Smith, because of legal restrictions. Thankfully, in 1990, any such restrictions were eradicated as none of the aforementioned hosts were still on the show.

However this vexatious issue returned in late 1991 due to one of the new presenters in the ‘year zero’ revamp (one Adrian Rose) following Smitty’s lead and failing to sign the repeat broadcast waiver! Fortunately, this only resulted in a couple of non transmitted shows but that kiss from Rose will prove to be more deadly in 1992 when multiple repeats won’t be shown. With all that said, there will still a few chart hits we missed seeing this year because they never actually featured on the show despite making the Top 40…

Alison Moyet – This House

Released 30/09/91

Peak chart position No 40

After finding solo stardom in the mid to late 80s after the dissolution of Yazoo, Alison Moyet began the new decade rejecting the notion of pursuing chart hits at any cost and putting artist integrity at the heart of her work. Her first album of the 90s was “Hoodoo” which sold reasonably but failed to produce any big hits as her commercial peak “Raindancing” had done. Maybe that’s what she wanted all along having publicly disowned that 1987 album.

“This House” was the only single from “Hoodoo” to scratch the Top 40 (and it was the lightest of dents) despite being the final of four releases. I think it’s fair to say that the track perfectly demonstrated her reinvention as a serious artist. A haunting, sombre number with a touch of Dire Straits’ “Private Investigations” in the verses, this was no “Weak In The Presence Of Beauty “. Its heavy nature meant that it struggled to find a home though in the rave obsessed charts despite it having originally featured as the B side to Alison’s cover of “Love Letters” which represented the peak of her commercial era. Oh the irony.

The fight for artistic integrity and credibility would continue with the release of the “Essex” album in 1994 before Alison would finally disentangle herself from her record label Columbia and return with “Hometime” some eight years later. Columbia meanwhile would flick the metaphorical v’s at Ms Moyet when they released a compilation of her singles in 1995 called…erm…”Singles” which went to No 1.

The Black Crowes – Hard To Handle

Released 05/08/91

Peak chart position No 39

*Originally released 1990 when it peaked at No 76.

In a year when the charts were seemingly dominated by rave anthems, there was still a small corner of the Top 40 reserved for some revivalist sounds, in this case courtesy of Southern rockers The Black Crowes. I’d certainly never heard of them before this point but apparently they’d been around since 1984 although they didn’t release their first studio album until six years later. That album was “Shake Your Money Maker” which included the band’s take on the Otis Redding song “Hard To Handle”, their first Top 40 hit in the UK.

I didn’t and don’t regard myself as any sort of enthusiast of Southern rock but I didn’t mind this. Knowing the original version of the song helped as well. I don’t remember the album being played on our shop stereo that much but somewhere along the line I also became aware of another single from the album, that being “Twice As Hard” (I think it may have been on that first Q Magazine compilation album that I bought around this time). The band would enjoy their biggest period of success the following year when their second album “The Southern Harmony And Musical Companion” went to No 1 in the US and No 2 in the UK. Rave anthems be gone!

Jellyfish – The King Is Half Undressed

Released 14/01/91

Peak chart position No 39

Sometimes the crazy world of pop throws up some complete anomalies, artists and songs that seem out of time with the era in which they appeared. Jellyfish were a fine example of this phenomenon. Hailing from San Francisco, they took their myriad influences of the likes of The Beatles, The Beach Boys, ELO, 10cc, Queen, Bowie, Wings and XTC and placed them all in a huge cooking pot, set it on a low heat and came up with a new pop cuisine that was both appetising and yet like something you wouldn’t necessarily choose from the menu. Intricate melodies combined with complex harmonies and all glued together by a timeless pop sensibility. Marvellous for pop fans like me but undeniably incongruous in a soundscape of rave and grunge.

Their material would engender a loyal cult following who saw them as the musical missing link but commercial success would remain tantalisingly out of reach despite tour slots with the aforementioned The Black Crowes. They even played at Wembley Stadium before 72,000 people supporting INXS yet “The King Is Half Undressed” would be their only UK Top 40 hit (and then only just). It came from an album called “Bellybutton” which included some great tracks including “Now She Know’s She’s Wrong” and “Baby’s Coming Back” the latter of which was even a No 1 for British boy band McFly in 2007. A sophomore album appeared in 1993 called “Spilt Milk” which the band saw as the natural culmination and apogee of their sound and which drew (probably unhelpful) comparisons with “Pet Sounds” – indeed they had even some ultimately unproductive songwriting sessions with yer actual Brian Wilson! It bombed in America though was better received in this country and the band broke up due to that well worn and weary of excuses ‘creative differences’. Their back catalogue probably demands a better legacy than it is afforded.

Milltown Brothers – Which Way Should I Jump?

Released 11/02/91

Peak chart position No 38

*Originally released 1989 – did not chart

When Tiffany sang “Could’ve Been” in 1988 I’m pretty sure she wasn’t singing about a gang of lads from Colne, Lancashire – not least because Milltown Brothers weren’t formed until a year later – but she…ahem…could’ve been.

Tipped by the NME no less for stardom as the 80s became the 90s, a bidding war by the major labels saw the band sign with A&M records who released a re-recording of “Which Way Should I Jump” (it was originally issued on an indie label two years before) which made them bonafide chart stars when it entered the Top 40 at No 38. A debut album called “Slinky” promised much with some nifty tunes that did much to dispel the idea that they were just another bunch of baggy chancers. I’m pretty sure it was a Recommended Release in Our Price.

However, the fates conspired against them with the release of follow up single “Here I Stand”. According to the band’s own website, the track was denied sales from independent record shops where they had done a string of promotional PAs by the chart compilers who feared chart rigging (officially the single was subject to the process of ‘weighting’) and it peaked at that most unfortunate of chart positions No 41. The repercussions were disastrous. No Top 40 hit meant no TOTP appearance and A&M lost their nerve and faith in the band. A follow up album wasn’t released until two years later by which point all momentum was lost. The band effectively broke up only to reform in 2004 and are still together to this day last releasing an album in 2020.

And yes they were brothers. Well at least singer and guitarist Matt and Simin Nelson are.

Nirvana- Smells Like Teen Spirit

Released 10/09/1991

Peak chart position 7

The first casualty of that unsigned Adrian Rose waiver and it’s a biggie. Who knew back in the Autumn of 1991 what an influence and legacy this song would have? I didn’t that’s for sure. I don’t mind admitting that I didn’t have a clue who Nirvana were nor did I get what all the fuss was about back then. It seemed to all happen overnight, this movement called grunge. Suddenly there were punters coming into the shop asking for that album with the front cover of a naked child, underwater and reaching for a dollar bill on a string. What was going on?

And then I heard the song. I couldn’t understand what they were singing about but then I wasn’t the only one not able to translate those lyrics that seemed indecipherable on first hearing. It didn’t matter. It was a huge cacophony of noise, bludgeoning the listener into submission. Immediately designated a legacy of being the ultimate anthem for a generation of disaffected, nihilistic youths, it is routinely listed at the top of all those polls like ‘The Best Single Ever’ and ‘The Most Important Rock Song Of All Time’. I’m guessing it still resonates with the younger generation some 30 years on even though those who were first turned on by it are now middle aged and thinking about their pension provision. The only track I can think of that has had such a visceral effect since would be “Creep” by Radiohead. Possibly. “Smells Like Teen Spirit”, in short, was a monster.

And then I watched this TOTP performance. God it was awful. From Kurt Cobain’s deliberately tone deaf vocals to his giving the microphone a blow job to the inevitable and uncovincing stage invasion. The band were never invited back. More informed and articulate people than I have already written millions of words about the influence and impact of Nirvana, Kurt Cobain and indeed “Smells Like Teen Spirit” so I don’t propose to write an essay on this but suffice to say that I’m pretty sure I have wigged out like a lunatic to this in some seedy venue on an indie night. Haven’t we all?

Saint Etienne – Only Love Can Break Your Heart

Released 12/08/91

Peak chart position No 39

*”Only Love Can Break Your Heart” originally reached number 95 on the UK Singles Chart. It was re-released in August 1991 reaching a new peak of number 39.

The second of two cover versions in this section comes from a band as far removed from the southern rock of The Black Crowes as it’s possible to be. Before 1991, if anyone had asked me about Saint Etienne, my mind would have immediately reverted to 1977 and that memorable European Cup tie between Liverpool and St Etienne that was one of my first footballing memories. David ‘Supersub’ Fairclough and all that. I would never have thought that 13 years later the defeated French team would provide the name for a dance act that seemed to come out of nowhere but who would transcend their club beginnings and become a cultural force for years to come. I say ‘out of nowhere’ but founding members Bob Stanley and Pete Wiggs had already masterminded a Top 10 hit in ‘91 courtesy of “7 Ways To Love” by Cola Boy, not that I knew of that connection at the time.

I think I first heard their version of Neil Young’s “Only Love Can Break Your Heart” when I covered for a day in the Our Price Piccadilly store in Manchester (I usually worked down the road in the Market Street shop). It never seemed be off the shop stereo that day and it sounded achingly trendy to my ears ( yes ‘trendy’ was still an acceptable word back then!). It had a haunting quality to it combined with a shuffling back beat that immediately created a perception that the band were part of the indie-dance scene. My wife bought the parent album “Foxbase Alpha” and the tracks within it demonstrated that they had much more to them than just that. 60s pop influences combined with club culture sensibilities and some art film samples shaped an experimental yet accessible album. I think “Wilson” might be my favourite track.

Apparently vocalist Sarah Cracknell doesn’t actually do the singing on “Only Love Can Break Your Heart” (those duties were performed by one Moira Lambert) as she wasn’t a permanent band member at the time of recording. As much as I liked the band, I did have a problem with them though. I saw them in concert around 1993 (supported by Pulp no less) but they used backing tracks and only played a 43 minute set! Crackers (she must be known as ‘Crackers’ within the band don’t you think?) announced at the end of the last song that “we’re not a rock band and we don’t do encores”. What a swizz!

Hits That Never Were

Airhead -Funny How

Released 05/10/91

Peak chart position No 57

There’s a surprising number of famous people that hail from Maidstone, Kent. There’s the actors Mackenzie Crook (The Office / Worzel Gummidge), Tamsin Greig (Black Books / Friday Night Dinner) and Shaun Williamson (Barry from Eastenders / erm that’s it). If that wasn’t enough there’s also artist, Children’s TV presenter and national treasure the late, great Tony Hart. When it comes to pop stars though there’s a distinct dearth. Yes, David Bowie lived in Maidstone in the early 60s pre fame as part of blues group Manish Boys but he wasn’t from there. So it fell upon a group of lads in the early 90s to maintain Maidstone’s end in the pop stakes and those lads were called Airhead.

Originally entitled Jefferson Airhead before being threatened with legal action by US psychedelic rockers Jefferson Airplane, they briefly garnered public attention due to their brilliantly poppy single “Funny How” gaining heavy rotation on Radio 1’s playlists. Despite this exposure and its insanely catchy lyric “it’s funny how the girls you fall in love with never fancy you, funny how the ones you don’t do”, it failed to crack the Top 40. They did achieve that feat with follow up single “Counting Sheep” as 1991 turned into 1992 which reached No 35 but it’s “Funny How” that remains their best known work. It was even used to soundtrack some montages in Match Of The Day at the time.

They only released one album called “Boing!!” which made the Top 30 but the band split not long after due to tensions with their record label. For those that know it though, “Funny How” remains one of the biggest and best hits that never were of the whole decade.

Crowded House – Chocolate Cake

Released 22/06/91

Peak chart position No 69

Prior to the start of the 90s, Crowded House we’re pretty much known in the UK purely for their 1987 Top 30 hit “Don’t Dream It’s Over”. Their eponymous debut album it was taken from did exactly zilch over here. Follow up long player “Temple Of Low Men” made even less impact (is there anything lower than zilch?). However, their breakthrough moment would come with the release of third album “Woodface” in 1991 which would sprout four Top 40 hit singles including a Top Tenner in “Weather With You”.

And this one. Very much the runt of the litter, “Chocolate Cake” was the first single to be released from the album and it was largely ignored by the UK. Maybe it was too confrontational for most people. The lyrics take a swipe at multiple targets including overweight Americans, Andrew Lloyd Webber, capitalism and how the masses will accept any old toss served up to them as culturally valid without understanding the value of true art. Something like that anyway. I never did work out who ‘Mrs Hairy Legs’ was though.

A thoroughly forgotten Crowded House track, it didn’t even appear in their 1996 No 1 Best Of album “Recurring Dream” for which the advertising campaign used the tagline “you know more Crowded House songs than you realise”. Clearly not “Chocolate Cake” though.

Elvis Costello – The Other Side Of Summer

Released 08/04/91

Peak chart position No 43

I may have included this one in the review purely because my wife is a big admirer of the artist and I remember buying this one for her (using my Our Price staff discount of course!). I’m certainly no super fan myself but I do like plenty of his stuff. It’s just that since his 70s and 80s heydays he seems to have forgotten to include a melody in most of his tunes. Sorry my love!

“The Other Side Of Summer” couldn’t be described as such though having been deliberately written as a Beach Boys pastiche (early 70s era) and it fair bounces along in a very hummable way. Its musicality is totally at odds with its lyrics though which takes issue with both Pink Floyd and John Lennon with the latter being taken to task for “Imagine” (‘Was it a millionaire who said ‘imagine no possessions’?”).

It didn’t strike a chord with UK music fans though peaking at No 43. Taken from the album “Mighty Like A Rose”, what I most remember about this was the massive Grizzly Adams style beard Costello had grown and that was used in the promotional images surrounding the release. Paddy McAloon eat your heart out!

Lenny Kravitz – Stand By My Woman

Released 14/09/91

Peak chart position No 55

Before bestriding the UK charts later in the 90s with massive hits like “Are You Gonna Go My Way” and “Fly Away” (a chart topper no less), his singles weren’t always hits. Indeed, by the end of 1991, he’d only ever had two Top 40 entries to his name – “Let Love Rule” (No 39) and his breakthrough hit of this year “It Ain’t Over ‘til It’s Over” which just missed the Top 10 when it peaked just outside at No 11.

“Stand By My Woman” was the follow up to that single and it failed to keep the hit momentum going, returning him to the chart doldrums by missing the Top 40 altogether. Why wasn’t it a success? There was no apparent reason. Yes, it was a change of tempo though still a well structured if rather mournful and brooding ballad as opposed to its breezily paced predecessor but who decreed that each song had to sound the same as all your others? Well yes, Stock, Aitken and Waterman obviously but who cares what they thought?

Taken from his “Mama Said” album which I liked so much I bought, its title could have been a direct response to Tammy Wynette’s “Stand By Your Man” although it had more in common musically with Ben E. King’s “Stand By Me”.

Lloyd Cole – Weeping Wine

Released 21/10/91

Peak chart position Did not chart

When a lead singer of a successful band goes solo it tends to be an endeavour fraught with potential obstacles. Will your fan base accept you as an individual artist? Should you stick to the formula that made you a star in the first place or try and attract a different (meaning more mature) audience? Will you change your image? Not many have made the transition successfully I would contend. For every George Michael there’s a Limahl. In the case of Lloyd Cole, the former Commotions frontman didn’t pull up any trees commercially but he did produce a more than credible body of work.

After his band called it a day in 1989, Lloyd hit the ground running with two solo albums released in consecutive years. Although hit singles proved to be elusive, the albums sold steadily presumably as he retained his fan base’s interest and devotion at least initially. The second of those albums “Don’t Get Weird On Me Babe” is regarded by some Lloyd aficionados as his creative peak and from it came the single “Weeping Wine”. Hardly my favourite song of his by any standard but there was something about this unassuming, county tinged lament that appealed.

Years on from this I caught Lloyd live at a gig in New Mills, Derbyshire. He was great – entertaining yet self effacing banter with some brilliant tunes. The best thing was the interval though. That’s not a slur on Lloyd at all. During the break in his set, me and my mates Robin and Steve decamped to a pub round the corner from the venue for a quick jar and who was at the bar ahead of us having a whisky but Lloyd himself. I loved that nobody in the pub (including us) bothered him for autographs or selfies. He was just another punter. And of course Lloyd is a Chelsea fan like me. Gotta love the man just for that!

Love And Money – Winter

Released 16/11/91

Peak chart position No 52

Who comes to mind first when you hear the term ‘Scottish rock and pop’? Simple Minds? Big Country? Deacon Blue? Maybe somebody a little less obvious like Teenage Fan Club? Or more traditionally Gaelic like Runrig? How many attempts would it take before this lot came up as an answer I wonder?

I first became aware of Love And Money back in 1986 when their debut single “Candybar Express” started getting airplay on Radio 1. It wasn’t enough to make it a hit but it was a solid marker of things to come. Fast forward two years and their “Strange Kind Of Love” album generated four singles all of which I liked including the title track and “Up Escalator “. Still Top 40 success eluded the band.

By 1991, their third album “Dogs In The Traffic” seemed like a last throw of the dice to achieve the chart placings they deserved. Yet another Our Price Recommended Release, it became their highest charting long player but even then at a paltry peak of No 41. The final single from it was “Winter” presumably kept back to coincide its release with its namesake season. It’s a rather lovely, reflective track that was quite the change from the rawness of “Candybar Express” and the slick 80s production of “Strange Kind Of Love”. Sadly it disappeared like dandruff in a blizzard in the Xmas rush peaking outside the Top 40 yet again at No 52. Criminal really.

Singer and songwriter James Grant is still out there gigging and recording. His band’s debut album was called “All You Need Is…Love And Money”. Perhaps he also needed just a little bit of luck.

Malcolm McLaren – Magic’s Back

Released 21/12/91

Peak chart position No 42

What a curiosity this was but then anything involving Malcolm McLaren was never going to be run of the mill! On Xmas day in 1991, Channel 4 broadcast The Ghosts Of Oxford Street, basically a vanity project by McLaren (who wrote, directed and acts as narrator for the film) detailing the history of the famous London shopping street. The narrative is helped along by the interspersing of musical segments performed by an eclectic array of artists including Tom Jones, Happy Mondays, Sinead O’Connor and Kirsty MacColl and The Pogues doing that Xmas song.

This being a McLaren project though, Malcolm of course grants himself a song in amongst it all and what a song it was. His previous musical output had pushed the boundaries of traditional genres with the likes of “Buffalo Gals” and “Double Dutch” but “Magic’s Back” was a straight up dance floor filling house track ably aided by the vocal talents of Alison Limerick. Malc’s contribution is limited to his rather creepy spoken word intro but the rest of the track is banging! There was a whole album of the songs featured in the film but like the single it didn’t sell that well.

I’m pretty sure that I watched The Ghosts Of Oxford Street on Xmas day in 1991 and I’m equally pretty sure I was very disappointed with it even allowing for my fascination of all things McLaren. You never see it repeated on TV do you? Ever. Funny that.

The Mock Turtles – And Then She Smiles

Released 29/06/91

Peak chart position No 44

I waxed lyrical about The Mock Turtles back when I reviewed the TOTP show on which they performed “Can You Dig It?” months ago in this blog. I don’t therefore propose to rehash all of that again here. However, I did want to include them in this section as they really should have had more than just one hit (and no I’m not counting the 2003 Fatboy Slim remix of “Can You Dig It?”).

Back in 1991 when that song was originally in the charts, the band chose the tried and tested strategy of following it up by rereleasing a previous single. “And Then She Smiles” was originally out in 12” format back in 1989 but it was re-recorded and given a second bite of the cherry to consolidate the band’s commercial breakthrough. It seemed a smart move. The track was radio friendly and not a million miles away from the sound of its predecessor. It had a decent shot of charting. Somehow though, it fell tantalising short. Maybe it didn’t have that X Factor hook of “Can You Dig It?” – its spiralling, psychedelic guitar intro and its bouncing bass groove? Was it actually just a bit too…pedestrian? Not for me I have to say.

The band (or possibly the record company) doubled down on the misstep when it released a third single that sounded just like “And Then She Smiles” in “Strings And Flowers”. Again, I was a fan but it didn’t make much commercial sense to do the same thing as before and expect a better return. It sank without trace and so did The Mock Turtles until that 2003 revival thanks to David Beckham and a Vodafone ad. “And Then She Smiles” finally had its day when it was used as the theme tune to Sky’s comedy drama show Stella which ran from 2012 to 2017 starring none other than my mate Robin’s sister Emma.

Pete Wylie & Wah! The Mongrel – Don’t Lose Your Dreams (Excerpt From A Teenage Opera Part 154)

Released 15,07/91

Peak chart position Did not chart

As the 90s we’re getting going, apart from a couple of collaborations with The Justified Ancients Of Mu Mu (aka The KLF) and fellow scousers The Farm, nothing much had been seen or heard of Pete Wylie since his 1986 hit single “Sinful!”. Well, those of us who classed ourselves as Wylie fans had been wowed by a string of excellent singles released in “Sinful!”s wake but as far as the charts were concerned, nothing he offered up to the record buying public had returned him to his former glories. “Diamond Girl”, “If I Love You” and “Fourelevenfortyfour” were all fantastic but each one had come and gone without a sniff of the Top 40. It really was a ludicrous state of affairs given his immense talent for turning a fine tune.

1991 would be a pivotal year for Pete but it had nothing to do with his music. Not that there wasn’t any music. Far from it as he released the album “Infamy! Or How I Didn’t Get Where I Am Today” under his latest pseudonym of Pete Wylie And Wah! The Mongrel. As I recall it was yet another Our Price Recommended Release. It failed to chart at all despite including yet more wonderful tracks to add to his remarkable ‘repertwah’. “Circle Of Salt” and the epic “The Kerry Baby” were standouts for me but the lead single from the album was “Don’t Lose Your Dreams (Excerpt From A Teenage Opera Part 154)”. A sprawling opus with everything chucked into the production and a title that referenced Keith West’s 1967 No 2 hit “Grocer Jack” was possibly out of place in 1991 but Wylie has never been one to play by the rules or do what might be expected of him.

Predictably (and quite wrongly) it sank without trace but that was the least of a Pete’s troubles. On 11th November he suffered a near fatal fall in Liverpool when a railing gave way fracturing both his spine and sternum. Thankfully he made a full recovery. Legend has it that when the paramedics arrived on the scene and went through the usual response questions to ascertain Pete’s level of consciousness and awareness starting with asking him his name he replied “You should f*****g know who I am!”. Pete Wylie ladies and gentlemen, part time rock star, full time legend.

The Real People – Window Pane

Released 06/07/91

Peak chart position No 60

From one scouse legend to another bunch of Liverpudlians who would end up with a legacy of legend makers rather than actual legends themselves. Noel Gallagher was a roadie with the Inspiral Carpets when he first met Tony Griffiths of The Real People who had been a going concern since 1988, touring the world as a major label artist having been signed by Columbia on CBS. They’d released their debut eponymous album in 1991 to positive reviews though commercial success had been harder to come by. Noel wanted to put together a demo for his band Oasis to send out to record labels and Griffiths helped him out by lending him use of The Real People’s own eight track studio. Lacking much in the way of recording know how, Griffiths and his brother and fellow band member Chris showed Noel, Liam et al the studio ropes. The result was the “Live Demonstration” tape that included original versions of many of the tracks that would end up being released on “Definitely Maybe” including “Columbia”, “Bring It On Down” and “Rock ‘n’ Roll Star”.

Although their Manc mates would go onto become the biggest band in the UK by the mid 90s, it never quite worked out for The Real People success wise. One paltry No 38 in 1992 (“Believer”) was the peak of their chart fame and a second album for CBS , though recorded, remained unreleased until 2012 when the band finally made it available independently. However, despite cult status amongst those in the know, the Griffiths brothers went on to write hits for the likes of Cher, Ocean Colour Scene and Atomic Kitten. Their band continues to play live and record with their last album being 2016’s “Monday Morning Breakdown”. The Real People then, the real people behind Oasis. Definitely….maybe.

Their Season In The Sun

Banderas

Communards offshoot group Banderas looked they were onto something in early 1991 when they took their single “This Is Your Life” (nothing to do with Eamon Andrews nor The Blow Monkeys) into the Top 20. Funky yet spiky it was taken from an album called “Ripe” which boasted the musical chops of Johnny Marr and Bernard Sumner as contributors. The all female duo of Sally Herbert and the striking, shaven headed Caroline Buckley shook up the conventional band template and they seemed in the right place at the right time to form a successful chart career. However follow up singles failed to make the Top 40 and the album similarly struggled commercially.

There were no further releases and the band dissolved, left with a legacy of the “whatever happened to…?” conundrum. However, excellent reissues label Cherry Red are just about to release a double CD deluxe version of the album which includes liner notes by Sally and Caroline plus an interview with their by old pal Jimmy Somerville. Banderas – a band ‘ripe’ for reassessment.

Cathy Dennis

One of the biggest breakout stars of 1991, diminutive Cathy came straight outta Norwich and achieved four Top 20 singles and a gold selling album in the space of 12 months. However, the hits dried up as she attempted to consolidate on her success and by the mid point of the decade the game was up. Cannily though, Cathy changed sports and became an in demand songwriter for other artists penning “Can’t Get You Out Of My Head” for Kylie, “Toxic” for Britney Spears and “I Kissed A Girl” for Katy Perry.

Chesney Hawkes

Poor old Chezza. Perhaps the ultimate here today gone tomorrow pop star. A five week stint at No 1 with “The One And Only” led to both fame with the public but also derision in the music press. By the end of the year he was pretty much finished. He even has to put up with the ignominy of being labelled a one hit wonder despite follow up single “I’m A Man Not A Boy” going Top 30. Still, he seems like a nice bloke and is happy to play his (not quite) one and only hit in the nostalgia circuit.

Color Me Badd

How on earth did this happen? A group who included a sub standard George Michael lookalike, a Kenny G doppelgänger and a lead singer who was the spit of that god awful rapper Snow somehow managed to have a huge global hit with a song with one of the most teeth grindingly creepy titles of all time?! Come on people! What were you thinking?!

Shamelessly riding the New Jack Swing wave, these four knobheads from Oklahoma briefly caused a sensation when “I Wanna Sex You Up” hit No 2 in the US and topped the charts over here. They looked ridiculous and sounded horrendous. It couldn’t last and it didn’t. One more hit (the candy pop of “All 4 Love”) and that brief craze was over. Color Me Fad anyone?

Marky Mark And The Funky Bunch

When you’re more famous for your kecks than your music then you know you’re in trouble (just ask Kris Kross). Marky Mark would of course go on to have a very successful film career under his real name of Mark Wahlberg but for a brief (chortle) period of time Marky Mark and indeed his Funky Bunch were very hot news indeed. A US No 1 single in “Good Vibrations” led to him being the face (or possibly crotch) of a Calvin Klein underwear advertising campaign. However, the stench of some repugnant homophobic views aired on Channel 4’s The Word would see him rightly vilified and his music career was dead after just two years.

The Railway Children

Wigan New Wavers who having spent their early years on the tracks of the indie charts finally flagged down a mainstream chart hit in 1991 with “Every Beat Of The Heart”. Their late arrival as chart stars didn’t sustain though and despite pursuing a timetable of further hits, their time in the public spotlight was cancelled (ahem).

Sophie Lawrence

Five years on from Nick Berry taking “Every Loser Wins” to No 1, another Eastenders actor tried their luck at the pop game as Sophie Lawrence brought us a pretty straight and sterile version of Donna Summer’s disco classic “Love’s Unkind”. Whereas Berry’s character Wicksy had been a fan favourite (especially amongst the female side of the show’s audience I’m guessing), I’m not convinced that Sophie’s stroppy teenager Diane Butcher was quite so popular. Maybe that’s why her attempt at pop stardom stalled at No 21.

A Stock, Aitken and Waterman produced follow up was recorded (a Kylie album track fact fans) but it was never released and Sophie’s time in the pop merry go round came to a shuddering and final stop. Dum dum da dum dum dum dum ….

Zoë

Like Chesney Hawkes before her, Zoë wasn’t quite a one hit wonder but she is surely only known for one song, her No 4 hit “Sunshine On A Rainy Day”. A well crafted pop/dance crossover with an exuberant chorus, it proved a substantial hit, staying on the charts for 11 weeks. Despite her album being of similar material it failed to convince record buyers of its worth and came and went without anyone hardly noticing. No 37 hit “Lightning” didn’t pull up many trees as a follow up so Zoë quit pop music and reinvented herself as a potter before returning to music trying out rock and folk directions.

Last Words

So where does 1991 rank in terms of musical excellence? It’s not a classic in my book but I don’t think it’s the worst ever either (yes 1993 I’m looking at you). The Top 40 – and therefore TOTP – seemed to be awash with dance tunes of every hue but there were some standout songs for me as well. “Can You Dig It?” by The Mock Turtles, “Sit Down” by James, “3AM Eternal” by The KLF for example.

However, there was an elephant in the room that the whole of the year (almost literally) was dominated by; one song bestriding the charts behemoth like that would forever be associated with 1991. I speak, of course, of “(Everything I Do) I Do It For You” by Bryan Adams. Was it a great big steaming turd brought into existence to remind us that nothing had really changed when it came to mainstream chart music despite the dance revolution or a phenomenon of commerciality that deserved our recognition? Yeah, don’t all rush to reply – I think I know the answer already.

And me personally? How was 1991? I didn’t know it then but this year was possibly the most stable year of the decade work wise. I remained in the same job working at the same record shop (Our Price in Market Street, Manchester) and liked the people I worked with. A brief wobble about the shop being sold off earlier in the year came to nothing and by Xmas I had become the store’s chart cassette buyer! The thrill of it all! 1992 would bring big changes though as for the first time in my life I got a work promotion and became an Assistant Manager but that’s all for future posts

I’ve going to carry on into the 1992 TOTP repeats. Fancy joining me?

TOTP 12 SEP 1991

After last week’s massive rave up of a show, surely the TOTP studio wouldn’t be taken over by mad ravers ‘avin’ it large again this week? Well, yes and no. Dance music is definitely represented by the artists in the actual building again but when you add in the videos chosen by the producers to be shown this week, you’d be forgiven for thinking you were back in the 70s or at The Royal Variety Performance. No seriously, two of the artists on this TOTP had either already been on Her Majesty’s favourite night out of the year or would appear on it in the near future, those acts being Cliff Richard (13 times!) and Right Said Fred (once in 1992). The mainstream acts didn’t stop with just those two though. No, also on TOTP tonight were Bryan Adams (twice!), Roxette and Julian Lennon who’s Dad John had also appeared at The Royal Variety Performance as part of The Beatles with his infamous “just rattle your jewellery” remark in 1963. Oh, and despite having only released one new song in the 90s so far, The Stone Roses are suddenly back on the show with a re-release of a track from their 1989 debut album for some reason. This has all the makings of a curate’s egg of a programme.

Before all that though, what’s the rather cryptic announcement from host Simon Mayo at the top of the show all about? “If you got your tickets for tonight’s show through Keith Prowse, you can watch through to 7.30 but cheer and applaud louder because you are watching for free. Seems fair enough to me.” Eh? What was the story there then? Some dispute between the BBC and the legendary ticket agency and music publisher Keith Prowse? Was Mayo legally obliged to say that? It just seems so utterly incongruous and bizarre.

Talking of bizarre, the opening act tonight are Bizarre Inc with “Such A Feeling” and these guys were definitely ‘avin’ it. In an attempt to stand out from the rest of the rave crowd, they have employed a couple of podium dancers to give a visual form to their track. Watching it back, it remains me of the time that I was working in the Our Price in Rochdale and on a night out found myself in the town’s Xanadu nightclub having become detached from my colleagues. My God! The sights I saw – including podium dancers! I loved working at that store but the delights of a night out in Rochdale I was not prepared for.

Bizarre Inc were from Stafford and at one point included a band member who would find their way into Altern-8 who were also having mainstream chart hits at this time. It all sounds a bit incestuous to me.

“Such A Feeling” peaked at No 13 but Bizarre Inc would return before the end of the year with a Top 5 hit in the re-released “Playing with Knives”.

“20th Century Boy” by Marc Bolan & T. Rex is next having been re-released off the back of a Levi’s advert. The marketing guys at Levi’s had struck a rich vein of 70s tunes to help promote their jeans at this time, having worked through a load of 60s songs at the back end of the 80s. They’d already turned to The Steve Miller Band and Bad Company in their pursuit of soundtracks to their iconic advertising campaign but suddenly they had struck on the idea that some glam rock was now what was required. I guess you can’t knock their choice; T.Rex had lit up the charts with some huge tunes that had turned Marc Bolan into a superstar. Between 1970 and 1973 the chart peaks of their singles read:

2 – 1 – 1 – 2 – 1 – 1 – 2 – 2 – 3 – 4

with the No 3 in the list being the original release of “20th Century Boy”. Come 1974 though, the spell appeared to be broken. The release of the “Zinc Alloy And The Hidden Riders Of Tomorrow” album met with a downturn of sales and a critical backlash. The return to all those complex song titles from the band’s psychedelic folk era when they were known as Tyrannosaurus Rex maybe wasn’t the best idea – as well as the album’s title, the tracks on it included “Painless Persuasion v. The Meathawk Immaculate” and “The Leopards Featuring Gardenia & the Mighty Slug”. The album wasn’t even released in the US and the band were dropped from their label. Bolan split from producer Tony Visconti and the group splintered.

Subsequent albums releases fared even worse but the explosion of the punk movement in ’76 seemed to re-energise Bolan and he even toured with The Damned as well as reinstating his public profile with his own TV show Marc. I was too young to experience those early hits in real time being aged just 2 when “Ride A White Swan” bestrode the charts in ’70 but I have faint memories of that TV show and I think my elder brother had a pin badge with Bolan’s image on it.

Of course, tragedy was just around the corner (or more specifically a small humpback bridge near Gipsy Lane on Queens Ride Barnes, southwest London) when Marc was killed in a car accident when his girlfriend Gloria Jones lost control of the mini they were travelling in. His legacy lives on though with names like Johnny Marr and Siouxsie and the Banshees crediting him as being a major influence with the latter recording their own version of “20th Century Boy” as the B-side to the single “The Staircase (Mystery)” single in 1979.

Simon Mayo’s having a nightmare here. After the weirdness of the Keith Prowse comment he’s started going on about Paddy Ashdown now. Was Ashdown in the news back then? Was this when all the ‘Paddy Pantsdown’ stuff was happening?

*checks internet*

No that scandal blew up in the run up to the ’92 election. I can’t find a Paddy Ashdown story for Sep ’91 so I’m not sure what Mayo is going on about. Surely he wasn’t using the show as a platform for his own political views?

Anyway, the act he is introducing via this political lay-by is Roxette with “The Big L.” The circus themed video for this one includes a scene where there’s five greased up body builder types huddled together on a small circular platform all playing mouth organ. What was that all about?! Maybe the video director had been influenced by the recent bare-chested antics of Marky Mark and his Funky Bunch or maybe even the “Do What U Like” video by Take That (the one with the bare arse cheeks and a ton of jelly) which had been creating waves of controversy around this time? With it being a Roxette video though, it just comes across as a bit safe and lame rather than daring.

“The Big L.” peaked at No 21.

Is it me or is there a bit of an echo in the studio tonight? I thought I’d noticed one in a couple of Simon Mayo’s links before but it seems to have spread to the performers now. There’s a distinct trace of reverb on Sabrina Johnston‘s live vocals on “Peace”. Or was that a deliberate sound effect? Sound quality issues aside, this was up there with Oceanic’s Insanity” in the bangin’ tunes stakes. Sadly for Sabrina, she also followed the same career path as Oceanic in that she could never really follow up on the success of “Peace’ . An album was released and two further singles from it but none of them managed to indent the charts. Indeed, Sabrina’s only other chart entry was when a remix of “Peace” made No 35 as part of a double A-side with Crystal Waters to promote the HIV/AIDS charity album “Red Hot + Dance” (the one with George Michael’s “Too Funky” on it). In later years though, she did go onto appear as a backing vocalist on Lauryn Hill’s album “The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill”.

More Paddy Ashdown quips from Simon Mayo next. Give it up mate! “I Wanna Be Adored” by The Stone Roses is the the prompt for him to get in another Paddy joke (as it were). Had Ashdown done a particular poorly received press conference or something back then?

“I Wanna Be Adored” was the opening track on the band’s iconic eponymous debut album from ’89. So why was it being released as a single two and a half years later? Well, I think it was to do with the legal battle with their then-record label Silvertone. The band wished to terminate their five-year contract with Silvertone whose owners Zomba Records took out an injunction against the Roses in September 1990 to prevent them from recording with any other label. The courts ruled in favour of the band in May 1991 but Silvertone appealed the decision thereby delaying the release of any new material from the band further. I guess Silvertone wanted to make as much dough out of the band as they could before they were their act no longer and so released a number of tracks from that debut album that had never previously been released (or indeed intended for release) as stand alone singles. “I Wanna Be Adored” was followed by “Waterfall”, ‘I Am The Resurrection” and a re-release of “Fool’s Gold” in ’92. Bit naughty that.

“I Wanna Be Adored” was also one of the tracks that my one time Our Price manager Pete played on as the band’s original bass player. The Martin Hannett produced album that Pete featured on never saw the light of day as the band weren’t happy with it until it was released as “Garage Flower” in 1996 against the wishes of everyone involved in the original recordings.

I said in the last post that I didn’t think we’d be seeing this act until her next hit in about three years time. I was wrong. Following her appearance in the Breakers Crystal Waters has moved up the charts sufficiently to qualify for another appearance this week with her “Makin’ Happy” single. The single edit of this was remixed by Steve ‘Silk’ Hurley who I very much see as one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse bringing death to music with his “Jack Your Body” No 1 single in 1987.

The video is a typical dance track promo with Crystal’s face superimposed over a background of abstract, dancing figure images and some very literal interpretations of the song’s lyrics – some Rocky Horror Picture Show style lips for ‘She screams Ah ooh’ and a camera for ‘Now picture you with me’. To be fair, most of the lyrics seem to be comprised of ‘ooh-wee ooh ooh-wee ooh ooh-wee ooh-wee ooh-wee’. It’s hardly Proust is it?

“Makin’ Happy” peaked at No 18.

Having gone after Paddy Ashdown for a cheap laugh, Mayo now sets his sights on pop royalty in Cliff Richard. Asking the audience the question who has appeared on TOTP most across its then 27 year history, he mimes us a clue of who it is. For some reason he thinks giving a double thumbs up and waving his arms about as if protecting himself from some falling debris is a dead ringer of an impression of Cliff! Surely the thumbs up gesture would be more likely to be Paul ‘Whacky Thumbs Aloft’ McCartney and although Cliff has been known to do some very odd arm movements whilst performing, Mayo’s interpretation seems very wide of the mark.

As for the song Cliff is singing, I have no memory whatsoever of “More To Life” but then I didn’t watch the TV show Trainer which it was the theme tune for. Apparently Trainer was a follow up (of sorts) to mid 80s yachting drama Howard’s Way but was set in the word of horse racing. As with Howard’s Way, Simon May (not Mayo) wrote the instrumental theme tune for the opening credits but lyrics were added for the version over the closing credits which were supplied by Mike Read (yes, the Radio 1 DJ). In later years of course, Read would pen “UKIP Calypso” for a UKIP dinner that he was attending and, with the endorsement of Nigel Farage, it was released as a single. It was widely panned as being racist for Reads’s mock Caribbean accent and the lyrics ‘The leaders committed a cardinal sin / Open the borders let them all come in / Illegal immigrants in every town / Stand up and be counted Blair and Brown’. That’s Mike Read there, friend of Nigel Farage and writer of racist songs. Arsehole. Read of course was very matey with Cliff as I recall and often did impressions of him. There really was no end to his talents was there?

“More To Life” the song is just bland, Cliff-by-numbers pop and the whole story saga should be condemned to the rubbish tip of terrible cultural ideas.

Marky Mark & The Funky Bunch are up next with “Good Vibrations”. Now I’ve always quite liked Mark Wahlberg as an actor. I know some of the films he’s been in have had bad reviews like Planet Of The Apes and The Happening and he’s certainly no De Niro or Pacino but even so, like I said, I quite like him.

However, I didn’t know until now when I’ve read up on him that he did some terrible things as a teenager like racially aggravated assault for which he was sentenced to two years in jail but served only forty-five days of his sentence. Eighteen years later he apologised to his victim in person who stated publicly that he had forgiven Wahlberg. Now knowing this information and reading an interview back with him in Smash Hits magazine as Marky Mark, he clearly was a prick back then. In said interview he refers to women as ‘bitches’ and the Smash Hits writer describes his conversation as “…the blokiest tirade you ever did hear this side of an Eddie Murphy Live video…” – like I said, a prick.

He followed this up a year later in December ’92, while performing on the cult late night Channel 4 show The Word, by praising fellow guest Shabba Ranks who had stated gay people should be crucified for which both he and Ranks were widely condemned and criticised (not least by The Word presenter Mark Lamarr on the show). Supposedly Wahlberg doesn’t like to be reminded or asked about his music career these days. It’s not hard to see why.

The huge dance anthems just keep on coming as Rozalla enters the game with “Everybody’s Free (To Feel Good)”. Having been massively popular on the dance floors of the clubs in Ibiza in the Summer, it was no surprise that it became a huge hit in the UK charts when the returning hordes went searching for a memento of their holidays in the nation’s record shops. Well, at least we’d moved on from those foreign holiday hits like Ryan Paris from back in the day.

Rozalla was born in Zambia though moved to Zimbabwe aged 18 where she scored five No 1 singles. She relocated again in 1988, this time to London where she worked with production duo Nigel Swanston and Tim Cox and the collaboration bore fruit in the form of “Everybody’s Free (To Feel Good)”. Looking at her performance here, you wouldn’t have imagined that such a huge sound could have come from such a diminutive and slight looking person. She absolutely bosses it though and has the crowd in the palm of her hand when she takes her very sparkly jacket. She would go on to have a eight UK Top 40 hits in total including a re-release of this track re-titled as “Everybody’s Free (Ca$ino Mix)” in 1996.

Moving the Breakers to just before the No 1 is really starting to piss me off now. It’s lulling me into a false sense of security before hitting me with the realisation that there are at least three more songs to review even though the show is nearly over. We start with a man not seen in the Top 40 for seven years but who topped all the Best Newcomer and Most Promising New Act polls at the time of that success. Julian Lennon had already released three albums by ’91 but they had spiralled into a pattern of diminishing returns since the success of debut “Valotte”. Subsequently, his return to the Top 40 with “Saltwater” was quite the surprise. Tackling the issues of environmental conservation and world poverty in a pop song wasn’t unique but neither was it a regular occurrence back then. Obviously there was the whole Bad Aid project to address famine in Ethiopia and wasn’t “Crazy Horses” by The Osmonds about pollution? Then of course there was “Save The Whale” by …erm…Nik Kershaw. I’m sure there are plenty more examples but my point is that unlike sewers and non disposable wipes, the charts weren’t clogged up with them.

Enter Julian with a rather drippy yet heartfelt take on it all with his 6th form poetry-esque lyrics bemoaning man’s capability to land on the moon but not be able to stop children starving back on earth. Musically, it inevitably drew comparisons with his Dad especially the “Strawberry Fields Forever” beginning whilst the Beatles connection was continued by the guitar part that was written but not performed by George Harrison. I quite liked it and its themes seem more relevant today than ever. Like his debut single “Too Late For Goodbyes”, it peaked at No 6 whilst his only other Top 40 entry was his cover of Dave Clark Five’s “Because” for the 1986 musical Time soundtrack winch literally crept in at No 40.

What?! Shabba Ranks was in the charts?! The Shabba Ranks that was discussed earlier for his vile homophobic comments on The Word? Yep, the very same but this was a year before that controversial moment broke so presumably, in ’91, he wasn’t courting the condemnation that followed. Here he’s teamed up with Maxi Priest for a single called “Housecall” which sounds horrific to my ears and which thankfully passed me by at the time. Fortunately we only get 18 seconds of it in the Breakers, a feature which now seems to be a totally pointless exercise in boosting the amount of songs featured in the show (we’ve gone up from 13 to 14 in recent weeks). Julian Lennon only got 24 seconds and the final Breaker Bryan Adams gets 17 seconds! This was ridiculous and presumably just a ploy to be able to say it was keeping up with ITV competition The Chart Show. Utter nonsense (as was Shabba and Maix’s collaboration).

Hang on! Did I just say Bryan Adams was in the Breakers? But *spoiler* he’s still at No 1 isn’t he? Yes, but both statements are true because he’d been at No 1 so long now that his next single was due for release. “Can’t Stop This Thing We’ve Started” chart life would would come and go within a mere five weeks peaking at No 12 whilst “(Everything I Do) I Do It for You” was still riding high in the Top 40. This was the time when it really started to get nuts I think. His new (and infinitely better in my opinion) song had been rejected in favour of a record buying public continuing to purchase his previous single that had been No 1 for over three months. This was just bonkers!

In the US, it would peak at No 2 but you know what they put on the B-side of the US release? Yes, “(Everything I Do) I Do It for You”! It had been No 1 in America for seven weeks! Why make it at the B-side?! In the UK the flip was a live version of his duet with Tina Tuner “It’s Only Love”. I quite liked the speeded up stop animation in the video which enlivened an otherwise straight performance promo.

So it’s a 10th week for good ol’ Bry with that Robin Hood song. The video for “(Everything I Do) I Do It for You” was directed by Julien Temple which I don’t think I knew before. Bit of a contrast to his punk origins of the Sex Pistols film The Great Rock And Roll Swindle. Apparently it was shot in Sheffield. You’d have thought that he would have chosen Nottingham as his location wouldn’t you? I mean, it’s only about 30 odd miles from Sheffield anyway. And, the day it was being shot, Nottingham Forest were playing in the FA Cup final against Spurs. All the omens and references surely pointed to Nottingham not Sheffield? I wonder which football team Bryan Adams supports? Oh he must have a team. Look at Sylvester Stallone (Everton), Tom Hanks (Aston Villa) and Kevin Costner (Arsenal). Then you’ve got Robert Plant being a Wolves fan and Dave Grohl supports West Ham.

*checks internet*

I knew it! Bryan is a fan of….my beloved Chelsea! Who said he had/was bad taste?

It’s Right Said Fred and “I’m Too Sexy” to play us out but before that, Simon Mayo ends his last show before the ‘year zero’ revamp by signing off with “I’ll see you sometime”. He definitely knew didn’t he?

Back to the Freds and there’s a link between them and the aforementioned Julien Temple as the latter directed the Jazzin’ For Blue Jean short film for David Bowie to promote his 1984 “Blue Jean” single which starred none other than Richard Fairbrass as one of the band for fictional pop star Screaming Lord Byron. As toe curlingly awful as Jazzin’ For Blue Jean is (and I’ve watched it) it still knocks the promo for “I’m Too Sexy” into a cocked hat. What do you think about that Fairbrass?

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Bizarre IncSuch A FeelingBizarre Inc? Godawful stink more like! No
2Marc Bolan & T. Rex20th Century BoyNo but I have a Best Of CD with it on
3Roxette The Big L.No
4Sabrina JohnstonPeaceLiked it, didn’t buy it
5The Stone RosesI Wanna Be AdoredNo but I’ve got the album
6Crystal WatersMakin’ HappyIt didn’t make me happy – no
7Cliff RichardMore To LifeGod no!
8Marky Mark & The Funky BunchGood VibrationsNah
9Rozalla “Everybody’s Free (To Feel Good)”I did not
10Julian LennonSaltwaterNo but I didn’t mind it actually
11Shabba Ranks/ Maxi Priest HousecallNO!
12Bryan Adams Can’t Stop This Thing We’ve StartedNegative
13Bryan Adams (Everything I Do) I Do It for YouDouble negative
14Right Said FredI’m Too SexyIt’s a final no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m00103fx/top-of-the-pops-12091991

TOTP 29 AUG 1991

The Summer of 1991 has nearly shed its last vestiges as we look towards the Autumn. And what happens in the Autumn? Yes, a new football season begins. Despite enduring years of disappointment, I still retained some small hope that 1991/92 might be the season when my beloved Chelsea actually win something. Back in the early 90s, we were a mid table side, we could beat the best one week and lose to the worst the next. We were consistently inconsistent. On the day this TOTP was broadcast, Chelsea signed a new player to help take us to the next level. There was just one problem. It was Vinnie Jones. The renowned hard man and one time member of Wimbledon’s ‘Crazy Gang’ was signed from Sheffield United for £575,000 and his main contribution that season was to break his own record for getting booked when he was cautioned for a tackle after just 3 seconds against his former club. Oh great.

Not only did Vinnie follow Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne so closely that he was infamously photographed grabbing him by the balls in 1988, he would also follow Gazza into a music career. For “Fog On The Tyne” read “Wooly Bully” which Jones recorded a version of in 1993. It failed to chart. Vinnie still thought he had a talent for singing though and in 2019 took part in The X Factor: Celebrity where he finished 6th out of 14 entries and performed covers of “I Fought The Law” and “Should I Stay Or Should I Go” by The Clash in Live Show 4 which is possibly the worst thing I have ever seen or heard…

Talking of ‘hard men’, this show starts off with someone who would make a name for himself as an actor playing some ‘tough guy’ roles along the way in flicks such as The Yards, Four Brothers and Shooter before branching out into lighter roles in Ted and Ted 2 and Instant Family. Back in 1991 though, he was more known as the brother of one of the guys in New Kids On The Block. It is of course Mark Wahlberg or as he was known in his pop career Marky Mark.

Having originally been involved in the NKOTB project but dropping out before they found fame, Wahlberg took his music career in a hip-hop direction with the creation of Marky Mark And The Funky Bunch and the decision brought immediate dividends with debut single “Good Vibrations” which was a huge global hit including being a US No 1 record. Nothing to do with the Beach Boys hit of the same name, this track instead based around “Love Sensation” by Loleatta Holloway which, of course, was famously sampled by Black Box for their mammoth No 1 “Ride On Time”. Had Wahlberg not heard that record before deciding to re-use its famous sample for his own track? He couldn’t have come up with something different? There was one difference between the records though and that was the acknowledgment of Loleatta Holloway who appears on stage here with Wahlberg. Presumably record label Interscope had taken note that Holloway had sued the heck out of Black Box for their uncredited use of her vocals and didn’t want to enter into litigation with such a formidable person.

The other thing that Wahlberg was known for back then was his pants or more precisely his Clavin Klein pants and his naked torso both on show in this performance. He would go onto star in Calvin Klein adverts the following year. Having watched them back, they really are quite repugnant.

“Good Vibrations” peaked at No 14 and was the only UK hit for Marky Mark And The Funky Bunch.

PM Dawn are next with “Set Adrift On Memory Bliss” having slotted snuggly into the No 3 spot behind Right Said Fred and Bryan Adams. I had high hopes that they would displace both on its surge to a triumphant No 1 but in the end they made no inroads on either as both stood firm against the onslaught of dreamy, Spandau Ballet infused R&B.

The video features a very brief cameo by Spandau’s Tony Hadley at its denouement. Well, his band were totally inactive at the time so why not earn some extra cash? The director of said video was a guy called Mark Pellington who sounds like he should have been playing centre midfield for Sheffield Wednesday but who actually went on to produce promos for the likes of U2, Pearl Jam, INXS, REM and Public Enemy amongst a host of others.

As for their album that host Mark Goodier plugs in his intro, “Of The Heart, Of The Soul And Of The Cross: The Utopian Experience” would go gold in the UK and platinum in the US off the back fo the success of “Set Adrift On Memory Bliss”.

Apparently, after the death of the band’s Prince Be, remaining member DJ Minutemix re-recorded all the vocals of the band’s catalogue to ensure he got more royalty money and for a while they were the versions of the duo’s output that you could hear on Spotify. Didn’t Squeeze do a similar thing to get around the issue of their record label owning the rights to their back catalogue?

Back in the studio we find EMF with their latest single “Lies”. I know they weren’t a one hit wonder as some seemed to believe and could name maybe four of their singles at a push but this one has clearly escaped my memory banks. Listening to it now, the formula was starting to wear a bit thin. This really did sound like all their other songs with the exception of “Unbelievable”. Apparently this was the track they issued as a follow up to that single in the US as they skipped the UK follow up “I Believe” thinking it wasn’t right for the US market. I’d have to day that my mind really isn’t tuned in to the finer nuances between those two songs to have made such a distinction other than “Lies” has a very slight Spaghetti Western feel to it. As for Mark Goodier’s claim the the band had sold a million albums in the US, I can’t find anything online to corroborate that but certainly they were a big deal over there with “Unbelievable” going to No 1.

As well as being commercially successful across the pond, they also attracted controversy and notoriety surrounding the track “Lies”. Initial pressings of “Schubert Dip” originally had the song beginning with 8 seconds of a sample of the voice of John Lennon’s assassin, Mark Chapman, reciting the first two lines of the lyrics to Lennon’s “Watching the Wheels”. Lennon’s widow, Yoko Ono, objected to its inclusion and as a result all subsequent pressings of the album have omitted the sample. Apparently pressings that include it are very rare and much sought after. Not up there with the A&M pressing of “God Save The Queen” by The Sex Pistols a mint copy of which sold for £13,000 in 2019 maybe but worth keeping an eye out for all the same.

EMF would return with their second album “Stigma” in 1992 but it seriously under performed – it was only on the charts for two weeks while its predecessor reached No. 3 and charted for 19 weeks. It would take a link up with Vic Reeves for a cover of “I’m A Believer” by The Monkees to take them into the Top 3 one last time in 1995.

Now I don’t think I would ever have described Prince as a ‘tough guy’ but he certainly didn’t flinch when it came to courting controversy. “Gett Off” was the first single to be released under the public billing of Prince And The New Power Generation and was the lead single from the “Diamonds And Pearls” album. It was also filthy. So filthy in fact that it had to undergo a drastic edit before it could be shown on TOTP. So, the first line of the chorus “Gett off, twenty three positions in a one night stand” was deleted for starters. Next, the lyric “Now move your big ass ’round this way, so I can work on that zipper, baby” hadn’t a hope of making the cut and finally the couplet “She said you told her a fantasy, that got her all wet (wet)” was included but had the word ‘wet’ drowned out by …a woman moaning?! How did that work?! In the immediately preceding lyrics, Prince used the word ‘jizz’ that also got past the BBC censor so maybe they weren’t on top of their game that week. Or maybe they just didn’t know what the word ‘jazz’ meant? I know I once worked with someone who’s never heard of it before.

As for the sound of the song, I wasn’t that impressed at the time much preferring subsequent singles off the album “Cream”, “Money Don’t Matter 2 Night” and the title track. However, listening to it in 2021, I can hear how it really was damn funky.

However, I can’t actually hear it without thinking of this sketch from The Fast Show...

Dear God no! Not Steve f*****g Wright with another of his ‘hilarious’ comedy records. FFS! There he is with the tin hat on miming with a guitar. Bellend! Of course he had previous for this sort of shit. As way back as 1982 he’d released a single called “I’m Alright” under the name Young Steve And The Afternoon Boys and follow it up a year later with “Get Some Therapy” as Steve Wright And The Sisters Of Soul. “The Gay Cavelieros” followed in 1984 (no, not at all offensive!) and finally in the 80s “I’m So Angry” by Mr Angry featuring Steve Wright. All were based around catchphrases or characters employed by Wright on Radio 1 afternoon show and they were all f*****g awful. Not content with having tortured us with this crud throughout the 80s, he decided we needed some more of his ‘humour’ in the 90s with “I’ll Be Back” by Arnee And The Terminaters. Obviously playing on the current popularity of the Terminator 2: Judgment Day film, this just stank the studio out. Not funny, no musical talent, it was idiotic and anyone who bought it must have been as well. Some f*****s did though as it went all the way to No 5. Completely and utterly inexplicable.

Simple Minds with a third single from their “Real Life” album next. This one was called “Stand By Love” and one generous soul tweeted while watching the BBC4 TOTP repeat that it was ‘The Most meaningless song ever written’. Ouch! To be fair, this was stadium rock by numbers by this point. All the ingredients for a Simple Minds song seemed to be there but it tasted as bland as the guy introducing it, Mark Goodier. Even the video is anonymous with it just being yet another in concert promo of the band.

“Stand By Love” was already at its peak of No 13.

The story of a band starting from humble indie beginnings before scoring a huge hit and bagging a major record deal is one that permeates the history of pop music. Yet for every James who switched to major Fontana from Rough Trade in the wake of “Sit Down” and set themselves up for a career of longevity and success, there is also the other side of the coin as exemplified by The Farm. Their 80s indie singles garnered them acclaim but no sales but when “Groovy Train” and “All Together Now” hit as the new decade broke, their popularity was enough to earn them a No 1 album in “Spartacus”.

Taking note of this success were Sony Records who signed the band and even gave them their own record label called End Product. With the backing of a major, what should have been a continuing tale of hits and fame turned into a footnote in the story of 90s music as the band struggled to re-establish themselves in the charts. Second album “Love See No Colour” bombed whilst the only Top 20 hit from it came from that ever desperate ploy of doing a cover version, this one being “Don’t You Want Me” by The Human League.

Before all of that though came “Mind”, the lead single from that sophomore album. It’s not that it’s a terrible record, it’s just that it’s not a very good one either. The chorus is pleasant enough but the rest of it is as sluggish as its progress up the Top 40 (where it petered out at a peak of No 31). And those shockingly awful lyrics like these:

Remember all the good times that we had
Some of them happy, some of them sad

Seriously though, what were they thinking?!

A genuine rock legend now as David Bowie is back in the TOTP studio after what seemed like forever but this time with his new(ish) band Tin Machine. This appearance was part of a big publicity push to relaunch the project with the release of their second album due out on the following Monday. They had already done Wogan in the week. For me though, once you’d got past the fact this was yer actual Bowie up there, the music just didn’t cut it. “You Belong In Rock ‘n’ Roll” was dull, dull dull. It actually belonged in the bargain bin (which is probably where it ended up). I even preferred Bowie’s much maligned late 80s output to this. Then of course there was all that nonsense with the chocolate eclair being shredded by guitarist Reeves Gaberels. What was that all about? Well, here’s @TOTPFacts with the answer:

Just ridiculous. What a load of jizz! Talking of which, how overexcited must the other acts in the studio that night have been to be appearing alongside David Bowie?! Let’s remind ourselves who they were again. Well, there was EMF (could be worse) The Farm (dreary), Marky Mark & The Funky Bunch (oh deary) and Steve Wright (Dear God!). Bowie must have felt like he’d stepped into a parallel universe. I hope he thought it was all worth it.

“You Belong In Rock’N’ Roll” peaked at No 33.

Third time on the show for Right Said Fred and “I’m Too Sexy” but first time for their promo video. Had they been in the studio alongside Bowie*, Richard Fairbrass could have had a reunion with him as he worked with David as a session bassist in the mid 80s and appeared in the videos for “Blue Jean” and “Loving The Alien” alongside him.

As for the video for “I’m Too Sexy”, well, it’s all very knockabout fun made on a cheap budget by the looks with the scenes within it a direct correlation to the lyrics. There’s catwalks, shirts being pulled off, cars, images of Milan, New York and Japan, and of course a hat. According to IMDB database that bit where Fred Fairbrass pulls off his brother Richard’s hat as the three Freds walk down the street was improvised and Richard’s reaction of surprise is genuine. Oh come on! There’s a string attached to the back of the hat which Fred used to yank it off. Was Richard really not aware of that and not in on the joke?

“I’m Too Sexy” stayed at No 2 for six consecutive weeks.

*Late update:

There’s only time for two Breakers this week but they were both memorable for different reasons. “Let’s Talk About Sex” by Salt ‘N’ Pepa would be another of those records that peaked at No 2 behind Bryan Adams and would surely have been a No 1 if the UK record buying public weren’t behaving so bizarrely as to keep the same record at the top of the charts for 16 weeks.

With AIDS very much acting as its backdrop, this was basically an upfront discussion about the dangers of unprotected sex in the form of a pop/rap song. The track was originally released on the trio’s “Blacks’ Magic” album but in the UK, it is more well known as being on their “Greatest Hits” album that seemed to appear very rapidly in October, possibly rush released to cash in on the single’s success?

The lyrics included some memorable lines none more so than the three way conversation in the middle 8:

Yo, Pep, I don’t think they’re gonna play this on the radio
And why not? Everybody have sex
I mean, everybody should be makin’ love
Come on, how many guys you know make love?

The brilliance of the track was the dichotomy at the heart of it. Whilst the subject matter was decidedly heavy, it was addressed in such a playful manner and backed up with an insanely catchy sound. A very clever rerecord all round. A huge hit globally (though not especially in there native US), it went to No 1 in eight countries including Germany where it was the first original song by an American hip-hop act to achieve that feat.

The second Breaker was significant mainly because of who it was by. Dire Straits had not released an album since the all conquering “Brothers In Arms” in 1985, an album so massive that it is the eighth-best-selling album in UK chart history. More than its commercial feats though, it was its cultural influence that made its legend. It was the first album to be recorded entirely digitally which perfectly lent itself to CD and would promote sales of that format within the rock/pop genre like never before. Despite being around since 1982, CDs had mainly sold within classical music markets but “Brothers In Arms” changed everything and became the first album to sell a million copies in that format. It became the default demonstration disc used by shops to persuade customers to turn to CD players. So huge was its perceived connection to the CD technology that it almost became a well worn joke.

Up against that legacy, anything the band released next was on a hiding to nothing. “On Every Street” was the album they came up with and despite going to No 1 and achieving double platinum sales in the UK, it was still dwarfed by “Brothers In Arms” which had gone 14 times platinum in this country.

“Calling Elvis” was the lead single and I have to say I found it a particularly drab affair. The Gerry Anderson themed video is fun though and reminds me of the Team America: World Police film from the makers of South Park. Very bad taste but very funny as well. “Calling Elvis” the song on the other hand was just very bad. If I wanted a song about Elvis Presley then there are loads of other songs that are more worthy of attention. How about “Blue Moon Revisited (A Song For Elvis) by Cowboy Junkies or “Tupelo” by Nick Cave And The Bad Seeds. Hell, I’d take “Walking In Memphis” by Marc Cohn over “Calling Elvis”! Mark Knopfler seemed very preoccupied by Elvis as he would write a song called “Back To Tupelo” as a solo artist.

Anyway, the single that announced the return of Dire Straits wasn’t a big hit peaking at No 21 but then I guess they weren’t really a singles band and the record company would have been more concerned about sales of the album. I was slightly more tolerant of the follow up single “Heavy Fuel” which was a very obvious but desperate attempt to rewrite “Money For Nothing” but that missed the Top 40 altogether. I did say they weren’t really a singles band.

We’ve reached the halfway point of its reign at the top as “(Everything I Do) I Do It For You” by Bryan Adams racks up its 8th week at No 1. It’s hard to recall what the reaction of the press and media to this astonishing chart story that was unfolding was. I suppose by week 8 there must have been talk of and reference to Frankie Goes To Hollywood and “Two Tribes” which was No 1 for 9 consecutive weeks in the Summer of 1984. Once that milestone was passed, I’m guessing all bets were off.

Looking at the songs that have been No 1 for the longest (discounting anything this century like Drake and Ed Sheeran) then once Adams got into double digits then he really was out on his own. Queen had been No 1 for 9 weeks with “Bohemian Rhapsody” in 1975 and indeed spent another 5 weeks atop the UK charts on its re-release in 1991 after Freddie Mercury’s death but that was obviously not a consecutive run. Apart from that, Slim Whitman spent 11 weeks at No 1 with “Rose Marie” in 1955 but that was so long ago that any reference to it felt like talking about another universe. By the time Adams’ run was into the teens it felt like nothing would ever dislodge it.

Of course, rather than being a once in a lifetime event, the phenomenon of “(Everything I Do) I Do It For You” started a mini trend. The following year, Whitney Houston took “I Will Always Love You” to the top for 10 weeks with yet another song from the soundtrack to a Kevin Costner film in The Bodyguard and two years after that Wet Wet Wet were No 1 for 16 weeks with “Love Is All Around” from Four Weddings And A Funeral. I believe they would have even eclipsed Bryan Adams had the band not asked for the single to be deleted so sick of it themselves were they. None of them though could match the feats of “I Believe” by Frankie Laine which spent 18 weeks at No 1. Initially at the top for nine weeks, after a week at No 2, he went back up to spend a further 6 at the top. He was then toppled by Mantovani before Frankie struck back by regaining the top spot for a further 3 weeks. Quite remarkable.

The play out video is the re-released “20th Century Boy” by Marc Bolan & T.Rex. My favourite story about Marc is that he chose the surname Bolan (he was originally born Mark Feld) because he liked the name of a young actor that he was flat sharing with in Landale Road in Barnes – a certain James Bolam of The Likely Lads fame. Apparently James wasn’t too keen on the idea.

Marc had been going by the name of Toby Tyler before this which would have been great alteration for his act had he stuck with it (Toby Tyler & T.Rex). Mark became Marc after a trip to Paris and at one point he adopted an absurd affectation of adding an umlaut to the ‘o’ of his new surname making it Bölan. Thankfully it dropped off somewhere in the mists of time.

“20th Century Boy” (the 1991 version) peaked at No 13.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Marky Mark And The Funky BunchGood Vibrations Nope
2PM DawnSet Adrift On Memory BlissYes on cassette single! No idea where it is now mind
3EMFLiesI didn’t and that’s the truth
4Prince And The New Power GenerationGett OffNegative
5Arnee And The TerminatersI’ll Be BackGet to f**k!
6Simple MindsStand By LoveNah
7The FarmMindThanks but no thanks
8Tin MachineYou Belong In Rock ‘n’ RollDefinitely not
9Right Said FredI’m Too SexyNo
10Salt ‘N PepaLet’s Talk About SexDon’t think I did
11Dire StraitsCalling Elvis100% no
12Bryan Adams(Everything I Do) I Do It For YouIt’s a no
13Marc Bolan & T.Rex20th Century BoyNot the re-release but I have it on a Best Of CD

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m000zwr1/top-of-the-pops-29081991