TOTP 16 DEC 1993

To paraphrase Frankie Valli, here at TOTP Rewind it’s mid December back in ‘93 and very much like the temperatures in 2022, I recall it being very cold. I was working in the Our Price store in Altrincham and travelling there from Manchester every day by a bus and then a tram. As such, it was an early start and I have a distinct memory of standing next to the radiator in our little flat not wanting to go outside to start the commute. The radio was playing “Babe” by Take That which didn’t help my mood as it brought to mind the song’s video which had lots of snow themed scenes including Mark Owen wandering around in what appeared to be Russia looking for his former lover in a bit of a blizzard. Aside from the cold, the work days were long and busy as this was a time before streaming where you had to physically go out to a record shop and buy a CD or cassette if you wanted an album or single. We packed so many customers into that little shop on George Street that at times it felt like the floor would collapse*.

*That did happen once when I was working in the Rochdale Our Price. A floor tile just cracked one day to reveal a gaping hole underneath. Just one of the many mishaps that occurred during my retail years including a man walking through the window which he mistook for the door, the shop’s fuse box starting to smoke, alarm call outs in the middle of the night, blocked toilets, failed central heating systems etc etc.

Despite all of the above, I was loving my time in Altrincham to the extent that me and my wife even contemplated moving there and even looked around a flat or two. Fortunately, we never made that move as in the first couple of weeks after Christmas came the word from area management that I was being moved again. I wouldn’t get back to Altrincham for five years. Enough of my personal life though, which songs were those busy shoppers snapping up as the big day approached…

If your hear the names Chaka Demus and Pliers, what immediately comes to mind? Apart from the ridiculousness of that second name obviously. For me it’s 1993 and their hit “Tease Me” and yet that No 2 (in more ways than one) was eclipsed by this single, their version of “Twist And Shout”. Somehow though, it seems to have escaped my memory banks despite it going to No 1 one in early ‘94. Maybe it’s because there have been so many different releases of this perennial song. I’m guessing most of us know it from The Beatles take on it in 1963 but it was very first recorded before them by The Top Notes. The first time it was a hit was when The Isley Brothers took it into the charts in 1962. Brian Poole and The Tremeloes had the temerity to release a version just four months after The Beatles (though they claimed they were already playing it live in shows before anybody else) and had a hit with it. It’s also been attempted by The Searchers, The Kingsmen, Bruce Springsteen and then in 1988, it was given the hip-hop treatment by Salt-N-Pepa and became a No 4 single in the UK.

Fast forward five years and here it was again courtesy of Chaka Demus and Pliers (plus Jack Radics and Taxi Gang). Maybe they were inspired by Salt-N-Pepa – if it could be hip-hopped, then maybe the song could be also be reggae-fied? Or maybe they took inspiration from ragga duo Louchie Lou and Michie One who took another song originally done by The Isley Brothers but made famous by another artist (“Shout” by Lulu) and bagged a Top 10 hit earlier in 1993 . Whatever the reason, Chaka Demus and Pliers’ version of “Twist And Shout” didn’t work for me as I could never got on board with all that toasting. Also, wasn’t this more of a Summer tune than a Christmas one? I know host Tony Dortie goes on about what a big party tune it is which could crossover into festive celebrations I guess but clearly the TOTP producers saw it as a Summer song judging by the palm trees in the set they designed for the performance here.

You’d be hard pressed to find a more blatant example of record company cashing in than this. Not having had Meatloaf as their artist for a decade by this point didn’t matter at all to CBS when it came to exploiting the back catalogue of their previous charge. With “Bat Out Of Hell II: Back Into Hell” and its single “I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)” tearing up the charts everywhere on the planet, of course CBS we’re going to rerelease probably his most famous song. So it came to pass the Meatloaf managed to be in possession of two UK Top 20 hits simultaneously in 1993 when “Bat Out Of Hell” got to No 8 beating its original 1979 peak by seven places. Who was buying it though? The parent album is one of the best selling in history so many, many people would surely already own the song so that leaves two options to my mind. One, Meatloaf completists or two, young music fans who’d only just discovered him via his latest success and either thought this was his latest/new single or wanted to explore his older stuff.

All of this just goes to show how perceptions can change in the wake of a huge success. Two years prior to this, “Bat Out Of Hell: Re-vamped” was released -basically a straight reissue but with “Dead Ringer For Love” added – and to promote it “Two Out Of Three Ain’t Bad” was rereleased. It peaked at No 69.

You know that debate that rages about this time of year about whether Die Hard is a Christmas movie or not? Well, there’s surely a musical equivalent to that argument about whether “Stay Another Day” by East 17 is a Christmas song isn’t there? Why am I going on about a track that is twelve months away from being the festive No 1? I guess because looking at their performance here of “It’s Alright”, it’s clear that they weren’t averse to pushing a Christmas agenda if it suited which it did literally here as all four members are Santa suited-up. I actually beat East 17 to it by four years. In Christmas 1989, I was working in the toy department at Debenhams and used to stand in for the guy playing Father Christmas in the grotto on his breaks. That suit stank to high heaven. The store had a fire alarm go off whilst I was in it and we all had to evacuate the building. I got a few comments from the rest of the employees whilst stood outside waiting to be allowed back in.

Back to East 17 though and Tony Dortie says two things that peaked my interest in his links. Firstly that Brian Harvey was “flu affected”. We’ve been here before just the other week when Gabrielle appeared on the show in person to say she couldn’t perform her single as she had flu. Harvey goes one better by having flu but still managing to sing and jig about on stage. Flu my arse! Secondly, Dortie announces that he’s off on tour with East 17 shortly. On tour? Doing what exactly? They already had two guys in the band who appeared to do not very much at all. Surely they didn’t need a third?! Was Dortie just going to introduce them on stage each night? Was that all? Nice work if you can get it. It’s alright indeed.

In Christmas 1993, Diana Ross had a Best Of album out called “One Woman: The Ultimate Collection” which was a huge seller over the festive season going four times platinum and selling 1.2 million copies in the UK. We sold loads of it in that Altrincham Our Price where I was working but we had to go against company policy to do so. The CD was officially priced at something like £11.99 but all the other outlets in Altrincham (Boots, Woolies etc) were selling it for £9.99. Myself and the manager Cathy came to the conclusion that we wouldn’t sell any at £11.99 and so price matched. We didn’t ask permission or tell any other stores, we just did it and it worked – we sold loads and maintained a decent market share on the album. However, when the Area Manager turned up unexpectedly for a store visit we nearly shat ourselves thinking he would notice. He had this thing he did at Christmas where he would help out serving customers and so we were sure we would get busted as somebody in the queue would have the Diana Ross CD. Myself and Cathy joined in serving trying to spot anyone in the queue who would give the game away and head them off at the pass by jumping in and getting to them first. Somehow we got away with it. Phew!

Diana did an extensive tour to help promote the album an Our Price colleague went to see her on one of her dates. When I asked him how it had been the next day, he’d convinced himself that he was Ms Ross’s long lost, illegitimate child so consumed by the experience was he. I’m assuming she performed the single “Your Love” which was a new track added to the album to help promote it but it was hardly up there with some of her classic recordings for me. It peaked at No 14.

WTF?! Eight Breakers?! EIGHT?! You have to be kidding me?! That must be a record! Five is pretty much maximum capacity usually. Presumably the TOTP producers have done this because the chart at Christmas are usually clogged up with new records strategically released to cash in on the extra sales at this time of year. Even so. Eight Breakers means a whopping grand total of fourteen songs on this show! Tossers! Don’t they realise how much work this is for me?

We start with another boy band, this time of the American variety who time would surely have forgotten if not for a gimmick surrounding their name. EYC (it stood for Express Yourself Clearly) had this annoying habit of signing off from any promotional appearances by saying “E Y See ya”. Ugh! Somehow this trio of ex-New Kids On The Block backing dancers (no, that’s literally what they were) somehow managed to bag themselves six UK Top 40 hits the first of which was “Feelin’ Alright”. It had a sub House Of Pain vibe to it tailored for the teen market but it was pretty lame all the same.

My main memory of this lot came the following year. I was now working in the Our Price in Market Street, Manchester where I first started three years previously. I was on the counter with the manager and he served a young girl with one of their singles. As he went behind the shelving to get it (the stock wasn’t in the racks live at this point) he said to me in a really loud voice which the customer must have heard, “This is crap isn’t it?”. How I cringed.

Next up a tune so intensely and annoyingly catchy it’s still in my head nearly thirty years on. I would have said that “Come Baby Come” by K7 was from 1994 not 1993. I’m kind of right. It reached its peak of No 3 in the January of ‘94 but was actually released in December ‘93. K7 was essentially US all rounder Louis Sharpe. A rapper, songwriter, record producer, he also went by the name of Kayel. He’s only really known over here though for this single. Employing that call and answer style of rap (is it meant to be him and his homies who he’s hangin’ with?), it kind of reminds me of that drill instructor song from the late 80s. What was it called again?

*googles ‘drill instructor song’

That’s it! “Full Metal Jacket (I Wanna Be Your Drill Instructor)” by Abigail Mead and Nigel Goulding…

Anyway, it also had that drive-you- insane shouty chorus that once heard is never forgotten*. Maybe it was just meant to distract you from those innuendo loaded lyrics which were actually pretty filthy. I guess the clue was in the song title but check these out:

Better move it fast so you can pump it (pump it)
Two balls and a bat (hoo), a pitcher with a hat (ha)
Slidin’ into home base, tryin’ to hit a home run
Swing batta batta batta batta batta swing

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Louis Sharpe / Joey Gardner
Come Baby Come lyrics © Universal Music – Z Songs, Warner-tamerlane Publishing Corp., Blue Ink Music, Third And Lex Music

You don’t have to be Finbarr Saunders to work out what’s going on here! I’m sure we’ll be seeing and hearing more of K7 in future TOTP repeats. For those of a delicate nature, you have been warned!

*Such an ear worm is it that thirty years later, when I want my dog called Benji to come to me, I often say “Come Benji come, Benji, Benji come come”.

Ah now, talking of delicate…how to approach this one? OK well, the facts around the record are that “Gone Too Soon” was the ninth and final single taken from Michael Jackson’s “Dangerous” album (the first – “Black And White” – had been released an incredible 25 months earlier). As the ninth single from an album that had been out for two years, even Jackson couldn’t eke out a big hit from it and it stalled at No 33. This was his lowest UK chart placing since a rerelease of “Girl Your So Together” in 1984.

Jackson recorded the track as a tribute to Ryan White, a US teenager who was haemophiliac and became infected with the HIV virus from a contaminated blood treatment. This was the dark ages of 1984 and Ryan was subsequently barred by his school from attending due to concerns from other parents that he would spread the virus. Given just six months to live, Ryan lived on for another five years in which time he became a high profile figure for HIV/AIDS research and public education attracting the attention of Jackson.

Unfortunately for the singer (and this is where the delicate bit comes in) the release of the song coincided with allegations of child sexual abuse against him made by the then thirteen years old Jordan Chandler. I’m guessing the single’s cover with a picture of Jackson walking around his Neverland ranch with Ryan maybe didn’t do the King of Pop any favours in the eyes of anyone who wanted to believe the allegations. The case was eventually settled out of court with the plaintiff reportedly receiving $23 million. Speculation about Jackson’s private life (already a media frenzy) had gone onto another, darker level. The scrutiny and effects of the accusations would never leave him and indeed resurfaced in 2003 with a second set of allegations. Jackson was acquitted on all counts in 2005. Four years later, he would be dead himself from cardiac arrest. At the memorial service, Usher performed “Gone Too Soon” and the circle was complete.

After being on the show last time, Cliff Richard is into the charts but it’s more with a loud fart than a bang at a lowly No 27 with “Healing Love”. The single would struggle on gamely to a high of No 19 but it was a far cry from the massive Christmas hits of “Mistletoe And Wine” and “Saviour’s Day”.

I can’t even find the official promo video for the single online so unloved is the song but from the few seconds we see here there seems to be a lot of billowing drapes behind Cliff as he sings. Haven’t seen as much material being wafted about since Spandau Ballet and “Only When You Leave” in 1984.

Next up a duet featuring a man who, despite being around since the time of disco, is only known in the UK for three songs, all of them collaborations with a female singer. Peabo Bryson first had a – no wait! You’re right. Let’s address that name of his before anything else. Peabo…you don’t get many of them to the pound do you? I’ve never heard anyone calling out “Peabo, come here now!” or “Have you seen our Peabo?”. However, I do know someone who once heard these immortal words come out of the mouth of a tired and frustrated mother:

Oi! Cleopatra! Pack it in or I’ll twat ya!”

Hessle Road, Hull sometime around 2010

Only in Hull. Anyway, Peabo isn’t his real name. No, of course it isn’t! Sadly his real name is worse if anything – Robert Peapo Bryson. Peapo! That’s what you say when playing with a baby! As I was saying though, he first had a hit in the UK in 1983 with “Tonight, I Celebrate My Love For You”, an horrendously schmaltzy ballad that went all the way to No 2. There then followed an eight year gap until he returned with the title song from the Disney animation Beauty And The Beast alongside Celine Dion which bagged them a Top 10 hit. Clearly onto a good thing, he returned in 1993 with another Disney film song. This time it was “A Whole New World” which was from Aladdin and was, of course, another duet. The lucky lady this time was US singer songwriter Regina Belle who had been releasing records since 1987 without much commercial success. That was rectified and then some by “A Whole New World”. Not only was it an American No 1, it also is noteworthy for being the record that finally knocked Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” off the top spot after fourteen weeks over there. The reception to the record was a bit more lukewarm in the UK where it peaked at No 12.

It’s been covered a few times including by ex- One Direction member Zayn Malik (alongside Zhavia Ward) but the one that really stands out is the version by the god awful Peter Andre and his then wife Katie Price who included it on their album of covers also called “A Whole New World”. The track listing includes their takes on “Islands In The Stream” and the aforementioned “Tonight, I Celebrate My Love For You”. Hell’s teeth! That’s a whole new world of pain more like!

Next another of those rappers that the white middle class kids of Altrincham, Cheshire would fawn over. Ice T had a reputation for controversy that far outweighed any commercial success he achieved, certainly in this country. By 1993, he’d already released five albums but had never had a UK Top 40 hit…until “That’s How I’m Livin’”. We kind of knew already how he was living (that’s with a ‘g’ rather than as a ‘G’) and that was tendentiously. He’d provoked the ire of the POTUS George Bush no less with the release of “Cop Killer” by Body Count a track he wrote and a band he was a member of. He is also recognised as one of the defining influences of gangster rap and had well publicised disputes with fellow rappers like LL Cool J. However, Ice T was also savvy enough to diversify and forged an acting career for himself, starring in dozens of films and TV shows like New Jack City and Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. “That’s How I’m Livin’” was taken from his album “Home Invasion” and peaked at No 21.

We didn’t know it at the time but the “Spooky” single would be the last material released by New Order (barring Best Ofs and rereleased singles) for eight years. For five of those years, the band didn’t see each other at all whilst the concentrated on personal projects. Yet again I have zero recall of this track. New Order singles of 1993? “Regret” of course. “Ruined In A Day”? Yeah. “World (The Price Of Love)”? Just about. This one though? I’ve got nothing, zero, nada. Like I’ve never heard it before. Why put out a fourth single from an album that been out for months during the Christmas rush? Consequently, “Spooky” only made No 22 which is actually higher than I would have expected. Maybe they just wanted to set a personal band record. This was the first time that New Order ever achieved four hits from the same album.

Tellingly, Tony Dortie says he doesn’t think the band have ever made a bad video. A bad video? Is that what they’d become reduced to by this point? What about the music? There were worst times ahead though with Peter Hook leaving under very acrimonious circumstances. Oh dear.

The final Breaker is a song that had already almost been the Christmas No 1 once and was rush released in 1993 to try again. Back in 1984, the whole of the UK record buying public seemed to be enthralled by Frankie Goes To Hollywood. Two No 1 singles clocking up fifteen weeks at the top between them meant that when it came to the runners and riders for the festive chart topper, they were the bookies favourite. They had an epic, bowl-you-over ballad that was perfect for Christmas. They even had a nativity themed promo video. “The Power Of Love” duly went to No 1 on its first week of release. What hadn’t been figured into the odds was Bob Geldof and Band Aid which, when the list of high profile pop star contributors to the record became known, was always going to be the Christmas chart topper. Frankie were dethroned after just one week. Could the 1993 rerelease do what the 1984 original couldn’t and be No 1 for Yuletide? For Bob Geldof read Mr Blobby. They never stood a chance though “The Power Of Love” remains a firm favourite on Christmas playlists to this day. Mr Blobby on the other hand…

One of the success stories of 1993 now (and it pains me to say it) as we catch up with Haddaway in Disney World, Florida. Didn’t we see PM Dawn and Boy George there this year as well? Did TOTP have some sort of arrangement with Disney? Anyway, after No 2 and No 6 hits in the UK charts, the big question for Haddaway wasn’t “What Is Love?” but “how do I get a third hit? Well, one of the biggest lessons we’ve learned from these hundreds of TOTP repeats is that if you’re a new act with a shiny, uptempo pop song, you can replicate that formula for the follow up but you need something different for the third release and what is more different than a ballad? Haddaway clearly knew the rules and his third release was indeed a slow, romantic number called “I Miss You”. Sadly though, it’s not only slow but completely laboured and ponderous. It literally never gets out of first gear. Just dreadful. The lyrics sound like they came out of a one minute brainstorming session about the most obvious themes of love and regret.

I miss you, oh I miss you
I’m gonna need you more and more each day
I miss you, more than words can say
More than words can ever say

Copyright © 2000-2022 AZLyrics.com

Dreadful stuff. Somehow though, this nonsense got to No 9 to give Haddaway his third consecutive Top 10 hit. 1993 really had a lot to answer for.

Take That have gone straight into the charts at No 1 for the third consecutive time with “Babe”. No other act had done this at the time. Not the aforementioned Frankie, not The Jam (they managed two) not anyone. It really was quite the rise when you consider that eighteen months earlier, their biggest hit to date had been the No 38 single “Promises”. By Christmas 1993, they were the undisputed heroes for a generation of teenage girls. Of course, it’s not like we hadn’t seen bands being screamed at before. Bay City Rollers, Duran Duran, Bros…and yet none of them attained this particular chart achievement.

Tony Dortie joins the band on stage at the song’s end for a cosy chat about how well they’re doing and so high on success are they that they take the piss out of dethroned No 1 Mr Blobby by doing some Blobby impressions (led by Robbie Williams naturally). The pink and yellow dotted buffoon would have his revenge a week later when, rather improbably, he returned to the top of the charts to bag the Christmas No 1. I remember thinking that this was nuts and how had it happened? I was no Take That fan obviously but at least “Babe” was a proper song. Somebody who was a fan was my younger sister and years later she went to see a Robbie Williams tribute act where, in an unlikely turn of events, the worlds of Mr Blobby and Take That collided once more. The impersonator was a rather rotund figure and so his stage name was Blobby Williams and he was part of Take Fat. Marvellous.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Chaka Demus and PliersTwist And ShoutNope
2MeatloafBat Out Of HellNo
3East 17It’s AlrightYes, yes I did
4Diana RossYour LoveNever happening
5EYCFeelin’ AlrightAs if
6K7Come Baby ComeI did not
7Michael JacksonGone Too SoonNah
8Cliff RichardHealing LoveOf course not
9Peabo Bryson and Regina BelleA Whole New WorldNoi chance
10Ice TThat’s How I’m LivinNot my bag
11New OrderSpookyNegative
12Frankie Goes To HollywoodThe Power Of LoveNot in 1984 nor 1993
13HaddawayI Miss YouAwful – no
14Take That BabeAnd no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001fy5t/top-of-the-pops-16121993

TOTP 14 MAY 1992

In the last post, as it featured Curiosity aka Curiosity Killed The Cat, I tried to fit in a few feline themed comments. Well, guess what? My research tells me that immediately after this TOTP was broadcast, we saw the last ever appearance on Eastenders of Ethel’s dog Willy on our screens before he retired. Sadly for Willy, his retirement was short lived as he passed away just two weeks into it. All of this means I can use dear old Willy as an excuse for a dog themed post. Be prepared for lots of ‘the dog’s bollocks’, ‘canine cahoonas’, ‘every dog has its day’ etc.

We start tonight with the follow up to one of the year’s biggest hits. “Stay” by Shakespear’s Sister spent eight weeks at No 1 and although the duo’s next single also went Top 10, you very rarely hear it on the radio these days such was the ubiquity of its predecessor. It’s not as if ”I Don’t Care” doesn’t have its merits either. A pop song that really bounces along yet is quirky enough to elevate it above the bog standard. I’m not wavered by accusations of sounding a bit too like “Don’t Get Me Wrong” by The Pretenders (it does) as it’s got enough of a bark (oh, here we go!) to make itself heard in its own right. In fact, it’s even got a highfalutin intellectual element to it. Here’s @TOTPFacts:

The performance here continues with the theme of Detroit and Fahey being oppositional to each other. They couldn’t be more contrasting with Marcella all sharp, angular haircut and tight control of her guitar and Siobahn… well I’m not sure what look she was going for but I’m guessing it wasn’t the one in my head which was as Aunt Sally after a night on the grog with her pal Worzel Gummidge.

“I Don’t Care” peaked at No 7.

If it’s 1992 then it must be time for another chart hit by The Wedding Present. Of the twelve “Hit Parade” singles released by the band in this calendar year, “Come Play With Me” would be the highest charting when it made it to No 10. My memory of working in a record shop whilst this project played out was that there was huge punter demand initially but that fans got fed up of it eventually, trying to track down these limited release singles or pre-ordering them every month, sometimes having to put down a deposit. This is just about borne out by the arc of the chart peaks achieved by each release:

26-20-14-14-10-16-22-19-17-17-23-25

OK, it’s not a perfect parabola but I think there’s a definite peak about half way through followed by a tailing off as the year comes to a close.

There’s no studio appearance this time presumably because the band were on tour as host Claudia Simon references so it’s the video instead. It strikes me that both the promo and indeed the song are almost The Wedding Present doing their best Beautiful South impression. No? Just me then. This was my peak The Wedding Present era. Not because I was one of those hardy souls trying to purchase every one of those limited edition singles but because this was the time I most resembled David Gedge. I was just about to be 24, I was lean and my hair didn’t have a wisp of grey in it. I may have even had something approaching cheekbones. These days…well let’s just say I have not been unaffected by the travails of middle age! Even in dog years I’d now be considered a senior.

Next a band who had been absent for the whole of 1991. Del Amitri had presumably spent the previous year recording new material and “Always The Last To Know” was the first of it that we got to hear. The lead single from their third album “Everything Changes”, this sounded to me like a distinct attempt to write a hit single and they pulled it off perfectly. A Rolling Stones-esque opening riff led into a well executed pop song that was perfect for daytime radio about the realisation that your partner has been unfaithful. Supposedly it’s one of author Stephen King’s favourite ever songs – “It’s so goddamn sad” he told Rolling Stone magazine. I wouldn’t say I was in total agreement with King – it’s not one of my favourite ever songs – but I liked it enough to buy the single. I’d liked most of their stuff that I’d heard before without ever being compelled to purchase any of it but I caved on this one.

The album would prove to be the band’s most successful going all the way to No 2 and generating four Top 40 singles of which “Always The Last To Know” was the biggest peaking at No 13. And that huge, sheepskin jacket that Justin Currie is wearing under hot studio lights? Here’s @TOTPFacts again:

If I think of the year 1992 in terms of the Top 40 singles chart, this next song always comes to mind. It wasn’t always like that. The first time I ever heard the name Kris Kross was when some young lad came up to the counter and asked if we had anything by them in stock. I thought he meant “Sailing” and “Arthur’s Theme” hitmaker Christopher Cross. This lad must have been listening to the US charts where Kris Kross were tearing it up. Their debut single “Jump” would be No 1 there for eight weeks.

Of course, there are two things that have to be mentioned when discussing Kris Kross – their ages and their jeans. Chris ‘Mac Daddy’ Kelly and Chris ‘Daddy Mac’ Smith were only 13 years of age when they had their biggest success after being discovered by record producer Jermaine Dupri in a shopping mall. Dupri wrote “Jump” for the duo which would go on to be the fastest selling single in the US for 15 years. Inevitably it would crossover to the UK market where we were unable to resist its Jackson 5 bass line and high speed raps.

We also seemed unable to resist their penchant for wearing their jeans back to front. In some cases literally. The duo were scheduled to do a PA at the Our Price store in Piccadilly, Manchester just up the road from where I worked in the Market Street store and the manager there couldn’t stop the staff from wearing their jeans Kris Kross style. My recollection is that they never turned up to the PA for some reason but I could be wrong. They called their fashion style ‘totally krossed out’ which was also the name of their debut album that topped the US charts and went four times platinum. We were only focussed on the single here though which was bought in enough quantities to send it to No 2. The album by contrast peaked at No 31.

As is often the case with child stars who found fame and celebrity so early in their lives, the Kris Kross story ended in tragedy when Chris Kelly died in 2013 at the age of just 34 after an extensive history of drug abuse.

Just a slight pause before the next act to make an observation about the staging of the show tonight. The hosts for this one are Mark Franklin and Claudia Simon but you’d be forgiven for that fact having passed you by. After we see the pair on screen after the Shakespear’s Sister performance at the top of the programme introducing the Top 10 countdown, apart from a brief glimpse of Mark as he introduces the Breakers, we only see them again at the end of the show (and even then as images on TV screens). All their segues have been voice overs and as for the link between Del Amitri and Kris Kross…there wasn’t one! Nothing. Just the camera sliding over from one stage to the other. What was that all about?

They’re still not on screen as we head into the next song which is “My Lovin’ (You’re Never Gonna Get It)” by En Vogue. The video for this won an MTV Video Music Award for best choreography. I’m not sure if that relates to the group’s moves or those of the featured dancers one of whom appears to be in full on gimp clobber but which Wikipedia informs me is actually a zentai suit and are often used for video special effects. Talking of which, I quite like the fact that at one point in the video the group are shown against just a blue background. I’m sure today that would be a green screen with all sorts of imagery going in behind them as they strutted their stuff.

“My Lovin’ (You’re Never Gonna Get It)” peaked at No 4 in the UK.

Some Disney schmaltz now and our very first sighting of a singer who would come to dominate / blight (delete as appropriate) the UK charts throughout the 90s. For their 30th animated film, Disney chose the 1756 fairy tale Beauty And The Beast by Jeanne-Marie Leprince de Beaumont as its source material. To promote the film, they decided to release the title track from the soundtrack as a single. Not the actual track from the soundtrack featuring the vocals of Angela ‘Murder She Wrote’ Lansbury though. No, they wanted it re-recorded for a pop audience and so settled on Canadian balladeer Celine Dion. Unsure though that she was well known enough globally to promote the song, they roped in Peabo Bryson to record it as a duet. Peabo of course is the go to guy for male/female duets. You may recall his ghastly 1983 No 2 hit “Tonight I Celebrate My Love” with Roberta Flack but he’s also collaborated with Natalie Cole and Minnie Riperton amongst others.

As the performance begins, Celine walks on stage against a backdrop showing a motif of the film. It’s not the Celine that we would get used to seeing as the decade progressed and her hits stacked up though. That massive 80s style hair! Eventually Peabo ambles on to join in but the whole thing is so anodyne that the performance has to be propped up with some video clips from the film.

Within two years Celine would be at No 1 with some proper dog shit called “Think Twice” whilst Peabo would score another Disney hit later in 1992 with “A Whole New World” from Aladdin which was, yes you guessed it, a duet with Regina Belle.

“Beauty And The Beast” peaked at No 9 in the UK and won an Academy Award for Best Song.

Three Breakers this week starting with a song that seemed to receive praise and criticism in equal measure. For some, “Everything About You” by Ugly Kid Joe was the missing link between the dumb ass joy of hair metal and the nihilism of grunge rock. For others, it was just a joke record, an opinion reinforced by its inclusion in the goofball comedy Wayne’s World. And me? I just accepted it as the knockabout fun I perceived it to be and didn’t mind it.

These Californian rockers took their name from spoofing LA glam band Pretty Boy Floyd (see what they did there?) and the inspiration for “Everything About You” from their friend Farrell T. Smith’s cynical take on life – we all know someone like that don’t we? The single was a Top 10 hit in the US but an even bigger hit over here where it went Top 3. Often thought of as a one hit wonder, they actually had a second hit the following year when their cover of Harry Chapin’s “Cat’s In The Cradle” was a UK No 7. Hang on, “Cat’s In The Cradle”? How’s that helping with my dog theme for this post? What’s that? There’s a sheepdog in the video for “Everything About You”? Oh well, that’s OK then.

I have a memory that at the time, the only other Ugly Kid Joe product that you could buy in addition to the single was an EP called “As Ugly As They Wanna Be”. Now I seem to remember that “Everything About You” wasn’t included in its six tracks causing some disappointment to punters but Wikipedia tells me it was. Yet when I checked the EP out on Spotify it isn’t included. ‘Goofy’ or what?

Saint Etienne were achingly trendy back in 1992 it seemed to me, at least with a lot of the Our Price colleagues I worked with but being fashionable hadn’t yet translated into chart success. Even record label Heavenly weren’t overly convinced of their charges commercial potential; so much so that when the band argued for their track “People Get Real” to be their next single release, they refused without there being a much more commercial track to go with it as a double A-side.

Undaunted, the band came up with “Join Our Club”, a song written to highlight how commercially viable they could be. To that end they referenced contemporary hits in the lyrics like “Smells Like Teen Spirit” and some classics like Stevie Wonder’s “Don’t You Worry ‘bout A Thing” (itself soon to be a current hit courtesy of Incognito). The result was a joyous anthem perfect for the forthcoming Summer.

The single rose to a high of No 21 in the charts becoming at a single stroke their biggest hit to date at that time.

The final Breaker is one of thosestorysongsfrom Richard Marx. I know at least one person for whom “Hazard” is a guilty pleasure not to be widely publicly acknowledged. Marx had a shit load of huge hits (or a huge load of shit hits if you prefer) in America but in the UK, he was barking up the wrong tree (nice). His only significant chart success over here came in 1989 with “Right Here Waiting”. The chances of him bagging a huge, chart munching hit single as the 90s we’re getting under way seemed remote at best. Factor in it being about the disappearance of a young woman with the main suspect being the singer of the song and well…Ladbrokes would have struggled to work out the odds. And yet…here he was back in our Top 40 and on TOTP.

There’s no denying it, “Hazard” is a weird song and even Marx himself wasn’t convinced – he only recorded it to disprove his wife’s conviction that it would be a hit. His wife (actress Cynthia Rhodes) was right and bizarrely, after years of ignoring his music that the US lapped up, it was a bigger hit here (No 3) than over the pond (No 9). In its wake came a trickle of middling to minor hits but nothing ever came close to replicating “Hazard”.

Marx does seem to be a decent sort though. In 2016, he helped Korean Air flight attendants pacify an unruly passenger and then took on Piers Morgan in a Twitter spat over his soft interviewing of then US President Donald Trump.

Back in the studio we find Ce Ce Peniston giving an ‘exclusive’ performance of her new single “Keep On Walkin’”. I really don’t have much to say about this one. I certainly don’t remember it – surely Ce Ce is pretty much just remembered for “Finally” – and it sounds like an unremarkable pop/dance/RnB number. Indeed, so unremarkable is it that the TOTP production team felt the need to intercut Ce Ce’s turn here with snatches of the official promo… which is just Ce Ce performing the song. Yes, the video mirrors what we are actually witnessing in the studio. What was the point of that? She’s even wearing a similar style jacket in both, only the colour is different.

“Keep On Walkin’” peaked at No 20 in the UK and was a No 1 on the US Dance chart.

We arrive at the current UK chart topper via another sound only presenter segue and a panoramic camera angle. Right Said Fred have been deposed to be replaced by…KWS? Who were these guys? Well, they were a dance act from Nottingham who got lucky with their cover of KC And The Sunshine Band’s 1979 hit “Please Don’t Go”. It was one of those hits that came from out of nowhere, a real club tune that went mainstream. They got into the Top 40 on limited airplay let alone any TV appearances before rising almost unnoticed to the top of the charts in just three weeks. At that point, we finally got to see them as TOTP had to give the No 1 act its rightful exposure. They have that feel of an act who have been performing at Butlins who suddenly find themselves plucked from obscurity and thrust into stardom. They can’t believe their luck.

“Please Don’t Go” is one of those songs that feels immediately familiar even if you don’t know who made the original. That’s how it felt to me anyway the first time I heard KWS’s version. Did I know that it was originally performed by KC at the time? Not sure I did. I definitely knew their unlikely 1983 No 1 “Give It Up” and “That’s The Way (I Like It)” from Dead Or Alive’s hi-energy cover from the following year but I must have also heard “Please Don’t Go” at some point without properly registering it as a KC tune. Apparently there were some legal issues surrounding a German act who had released their own version at the same time but we’ve got a few weeks of KWS at No 1 so that story can wait for another post.

And that’s that. All the dog poo has been scooped up and it’s time to put it in the bin. OK. That’s unfair. Not all the acts on tonight’s show were excrement – I bought at least one of them – but I need to bring this dog theme to an end somehow.

RIP Willy
Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Shakespear’s SisterI Don’t CareNope
2The Wedding Present Come Play With MeNo
3Del AmitriAlways The Last To KnowYes – this is in my singles box
4Kriss KrossJumpFun but not purchase worthy
5En VogueMy Lovin’ (You’re Never Gonna Get It)Yes this is in the singles box and well though I think my wife actually bought it
6Celine Dion and Peabo BrysonBeauty And The BeastNever happening
7Ugly Kid JoeEverything About YouSee 4 above
8Saint EtienneJoin Our ClubNegative
9Richard MarxHazardNah
10Ce Ce PensionKeep On Walkin’I’d rather take out dog for a walk in the pissing wind
11KWSPlease Don’t GoAnd no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0014j5t/top-of-the-pops-14051992