The Grid

TOTP 15 SEP 1994

Posted on May 25, 2023 by 80stastic

After a ‘golden mic’ guest presenter spot from East 17’s Tony and Brian last week, we’re back to the roster of Radio 1 DJs and guess who we’ve got again this week? Yes, it’s Simon ‘Smug’ Mayo! I know I bang on about him on a regular basis but he really is/was insufferable! I think it’s the way he seems to think that the audience had tuned in to see him and what he had to say rather than the artists and the music on the show that really irks me. You weren’t the main attraction Mayo, you really weren’t. I know I’ve accused fellow presenter Mark Goodier of being a bit dull in the past but at least he realised why he was there and got on with the job in an unassuming way. Somehow, Mayo’s ego wouldn’t allow him to follow suit. Right well, let’s see how many times he can piss me off in this particular show. Rant mode engaged…

Mayo kicks off his demonstration of his witty repartee with this pathetically weak intro:

“Franklin D. Roosevelt…John F. Kennedy…and Sophie B. Hawkins…”

That’s it. No welcome. No promotion of the show. Just an incredibly tenuous exercise in name association. Assuming that he came up with his lines himself, did he really think that was good enough? It’s not a start that bodes well.

As for Sophie herself, it’s quite a memorable performance of her hit “Right Bedside You” with her strapped to a bongo drum throughout. I can’t work out what the parked bicycle on stage was all about though other than it was…well…right beside Sophie. Going back to her name though, I wonder why she used the affectation of a middle initial? Was there another Sophie Hawkins whom she wanted to avoid being confused with? I’ve looked online and the only other Sophie Hawkins I can find is someone who designs jumpsuits for a living. Damn! I wish I wore a jumpsuit? Nah, it doesn’t quite work does it?

More buffoonery from Mayo next but this time he tries to illicit some humour from the song title rather than the artist’s name. The former is “Rollercoaster” and the latter is The Grid so Mayo sees it as a perfect opportunity for some physical comedy by asking the TV audience to put their arms in the air as if they are on an actual rollercoaster. With his own arms aloft, he gestures to some off camera minion to put a microphone to his mouth so he can continue to speak as he says “Here we goooo…”. It’s about as funny as whiplash.

As for The Grid, their huge surprise hit “Swamp Thing” had only just dropped out of the charts after a marathon run but they were back in immediately with this follow up. I’m sure people who know about these things would say that it was a ‘banger’ or something but all I know is that it didn’t have that distinctive banjo hook that its predecessor had and therefore didn’t cut through to a mainstream audience in the same way. “Rollercoaster” peaked at No 19 whilst “Swamp Thing” went to No 3.

After trying some physical comedy, Simon Mayo attempts a play on words in his next intro. “Lend your ears to Lisa Loeb” he delights in telling us. Careful your sides don’t split everyone!

After being part of the satellite segue the last time she was on, this time we get the official video for “Stay (I Missed You)”. Directed by her friend Ethan Hawke who was also the reason that the song ended up in the film Reality Bites after he made it available to director Ben Stiller, it’s simple to the point of boring but yet somehow effective. Lisa just singing direct to camera as she wanders around a sparse New York apartment in an almost confessional way with just a cat for company (that belonged to Hawke by the way) shouldn’t really work but kind of does. It was even chosen by Spin magazine as their video of the year.

Ever wondered what was the reason behind the naming of her band? The single is officially credited to Lisa Loeb & Nine Stories after all. Well, apparently Nine Stories was taken from the collection of short stories by J.D.Salinger one of which was called The Laughing Man. Hmm. No doubt Simon Mayo would have taken that as a nickname. Psst. Simon. We’re laughing at you not with you.

Wicked! Wicked! Junglist Massive! Oh God. The era of ‘jungle’ is upon us. As a pop kid, I was never going to get on board with this and listening to it now, I feel the same as when I first heard it – what a racket! It fell upon M–Beat featuring General Levy to bring jungle to the masses via their twice released track “Incredible” (it was originally out earlier in the year when it made No 39 before this rerelease took it into the Top 10). Now I always thought that the General was shouting “Jungle Ist Massive” rather than “Junglist massive” though neither really make much sense but apparently ‘Junglist’ originally referred to a person living in an area of West Kingston, Jamaica called Jungle but which was later hijacked to mean a dedicated enthusiast of jungle music with the ‘Massive’ part being the community.

Another element to this that I found confusing was the difference between jungle and drum ‘n’ bass. I’m still not sure what it is or if it even exists. At some point as the movement gathered pace, they seemed to become interchangeable. Despite my perplexity and reticence, I was convinced by my fellow Our Price colleagues to explore the jungle by going to an appearance at the legendary Hacienda club by drum ‘n’ bass heavyweight LTJ Bukem. And you know what? I had a good night. I could hear and feel how the music made sense in that setting. Did I want to listen to drum ‘n’ bass on my stereo at home? No chance.

Apparently, the success of “Incredible” went to General Levy’s head and he made a statement in an interview in The Face magazine that he was “runnin’ jungle” which led to a backlash from the rest of the scene and a campaign against the song with some pirate radio stations refusing to play it. Eight years later it would feature in the film Ali G Indahouse which gave the world Ali G and Shaggy’s track “Me Julie”. Hmm.

What’s that? Simon Mayo’s intro? Oh it was some bollocks about Roy Wood’s beard being a jungle. Tosser.

Having already tried physical comedy and word play, Mayo now attempts what Ben Elton used to call “a bit of politics” when introducing REM. With their new single being called “What’s The Frequency, Kenneth?”, Mayo makes reference to the then Chancellor of the Exchequer Kenneth Clarke saying the real question should be “what’s the interest rate going to be Kenneth?”. Hysterical I’m sure you’ll agree.

The lead track from hotly anticipated new album “Monster”, “What’s The Frequency, Kenneth?” didn’t disappoint. Built around a huge, reverberating guitar sound, it was, to quote Madness, a “heavy, heavy monster sound”. I recall that we sold out of the CD single on the day of release in the Our Price I was working in though we had plenty of the cassette version left. This seemed to me more evidence (if any were needed) that they were now a long way from their early beginnings as indie darlings and had transitioned into rock behemoths, selling CDs Dire Straits style as quickly as they could be pressed. The album was another huge unit shifter selling 9 million copies worldwide but that was only around half of what its predecessor “Automatic For The People” sold.

Ever wondered what the song title was all about? Well, it’s not the most pleasant story. Here’s @TOTPFacts:

The title of "What’s The Frequency, Kenneth?" refers to an incident in New York City on 4 October 1986, when two people attacked news anchor Dan Rather, while repeating the phrase "Kenneth, what is the frequency?" #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) May 12, 2023

The incident remained a mystery until 1997, when the main assailant was confirmed to be William Tager, a man convicted of killing an NBC stagehand outside The Today Show studio in 1994. #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) May 12, 2023

Tager believed that television networks were beaming signals into his brain – hence his desire to find out what frequency they were using, so he could block the signals. #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) May 12, 2023

At least Mayo didn’t try to make a joke out of that.

An exclusive performance from Sinéad O’Connor next to plug her latest album “Universal Mother”. After 1992’s covers album “Am I Not Your Girl?” received a lukewarm reception from critics and a controversy courting promotional appearance on Saturday Night Live in which she tore up a photo of the Pope, I’m guessing her record company needed a solid outing for her next collection of songs. However, what they got was an album that once again divided opinion. Featuring songs that dealt with family trauma, it wasn’t an easy listen. Here’s Sinéad herself commenting on it:

“That album was the first attempt to try to expose what was really underneath a lot of the anger of the other records. George Michael told me he loved that record, but could only listen to it once because it was so painful. He had to hide it.”
Doyle, Tom (October 2005). “The Mojo interview”. Mojo. No. 143. p. 43.

The track performed here – “Fire On Babylon” was released as the second single from the album but didn’t chart in the UK though lead single “Thank You For Hearing Me” made No 13. Sinéad unleashes her usual transcendental vocal on top of a mesmerising backbeat but it’s a bit too intense for my ears. By the way, Simon Mayo makes no attempt at any humour whilst introducing Sinéad – probably scared of her.

Something from the album chart now. Elvis Presley had been dead for 17 years by this point (as Mayo delights in telling us in his intro) but that didn’t stop his vast back catalogue from being raided and repackaged. “Elvis -The Essential Collection” was a 28 track compilation album released by RCA that featured just about everything the casual fan would want to hear in one handy album. Not that there hadn’t been such Best Of packages before. I’m pretty sure there was a double album released in 1987 that had been a big seller and according to his discography on Wikipedia, there exists 115 posthumous compilations.

The track chosen by TOTP for an outing is “Return To Sender” which was the UK’s Christmas No 1 of 1962. It featured in the film Girls! Girls! Girls! which was one of those mostly dreadful Elvis musical comedies that he did (a lot). The plot (such as it is) according to Wikipedia is that Elvis plays a Hawaiian based fisherman who dreams of owning the boat he built with his father. Oh, and he’s caught up in a love triangle and has to choose between two women (obviously). I just wish we could have returned Simon Mayo to sender.

My wish is granted! Well, in a staged hijacking kind of way but I’ll take it. Just as Mayo begins his intro for Mariah Carey and Luther Vandross, last week’s presenters Tony and Brian from East 17 gatecrash proceedings and bundle the Radio 1 DJ off screen so that they can do it instead. Nice one lads! Whatever Mayo would have said, it wouldn’t have been as amusing as hearing Brian pronounce Luther’s surname as ‘Van – de – Ross’. Mind you, that’s better than a late night North East local radio DJ doing a love songs show that my mate Robin once heard introduce in a seductive manner as “Luther…V…D”. Erm…

Mariah and Luther are in the studio to perform their cover of the Lionel Richie / Diana Ross (sorry – Miss Diana Ross) sing “Endless Love”. There’s a curious bit right at the start where the producers seem to cock up who the camera should be on. As Mariah draws breath between her first and second lines, the camera suddenly reverts to Luther for a nano second for no reason. Maybe Tony and Brian hijacker’s the TV gantry as well.

After 15 long (some may say torturous) weeks, we finally have a new No 1. Whigfield is her name or rather it wasn’t. Her actual name is Sannie Carlson and the name of the act was Whigfield (see Blondie and Toyah also). To add to the confusion, the act originated from Italy via producer Larry Pignagnoli but Sannie herself was / is Danish. Anyway, “Saturday Night” was another of those Summer time hits imported from Europe that always charted just as we entered Autumn as the holiday making herd returned home and wanted a copy of that record they kept dancing to in the clubs of the continent. Ah yes, the dance. “Saturday Night” came with its own dance just as “Superman” and “Agadoo” by Black Lace had back in the mid 80s and like “Macarena” by Los Del Rio would have a few years later. I can’t recall exactly how it went but I think there was some laying of hands on shoulders and hips and jumping forward with your feet together. Apparently, Sannie never did the dance herself and wasn’t keen on promoting it. Nobody is sure who came up with it but the best guess is a gym instructor used the song to soundtrack a fitness class and the moves were taken from there and repeated in the clubs. Or something. Whigfield will be at No 1 for 4 weeks in total. Oh dear.

There’s a change of format at the death as the play out song over a montage of clips from the show we’d just watched is ditched. Let’s be fair, it was a crap idea that never worked. In its place is a plug for the brand new retro show TOTP2. A retread of the show’s archives narrated initially by Johnnie Walker, the programme would be trailed at the end of the regular show by showing a clip of a song that would be featured that week. I’m not going to start reviewing those as part of the blog as it kind of disrupts the timeline and makes an outlier of the track chosen. In any case, if it’s something from 1983 onwards, I’ll have reviewed it anyway.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Sophie B. Hawkins	Right Beside You	Nope
2	The Grid	Rollercoaster	I did not
3	Lisa Loeb & Nine Stories	Stay (I Missed You)	No
4	M-Beat featuring General Levy	Incredible	Never happening
5	REM	What’s The Frequency, Kenneth?	Liked it, didn’t buy it
6	Sinéad O’Connor	Fire On Babylon	Nah
7	Elvis Presley	Return To Sender	My Mum is a huge fan but no
8	Mariah Carey and Luther Vandross	Endless Love	Negative
9	Whigfield	Saturday Night	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001lst6/top-of-the-pops-15091994

TOTP 21 JUL 1994

Posted on April 29, 2023 by 80stastic

After one ‘Julian C’ on the show last week in the form of Julian Cope, we have another tonight as Julian Clary takes on the role of presenter. Now, I’m wondering if this was quite the controversial choice on behalf of head producer Ric Blaxill as just seven months before, Clary had caused a furore at the British Comedy Awards when he had compared the set to Hampstead Heath and joked that he’d just been fisting former Chancellor of the Exchequer Norman Lamont backstage. The uproarious audience reaction meant that his punchline “Talk about a red box!” went largely unnoticed. However, the damage had been done for The Daily Mail and The Sun who campaigned to have Julian banned from TV. Haven’t moved on much in 30 years have we?

Anyway, was seven months a big enough time gap for all that media outrage to have died down? Ric Blaxill must have been hoping that the public were at the stage where the opportunity for offence had dissipated but the potential for a return to the public consciousness moments of “did you see that on TOTP last night?” was still very much alive. I’m thinking the debut of Boy George on the show in 1982 or Nirvana in 1991. Julian was, no doubt, a big name by 1994 and not just because of his Lamont moment. I think I was first aware of him (and Fanny the Wonder Dog) in the 80s on Friday Night Live and then his game show Sticky Moments With Julian Clary. He’d even released a single in 1988 – a cover of “Leader Of The Pack” under the name of The Joan Collins Fanclub. I wonder if Julian’s turn on tonight’s show would have caused a bulging Points Of View post bag or not?

Well, Julian has certainly come dressed for the occasion in leopard print cat suit and a feather boa accessory and he gets us raving (his word) straight away with Clubhouse and “Living In The Sunshine”. Bizarrely, despite working in record shops whilst these Italian house merchants were having a couple of hits in 1994, the only single of theirs I can remember is their Steely Dan / Michael Jackson mash up “Do It Again” from a decade earlier. There’s a scientific term for this phenomenon which is the ‘reminiscence bump’ – people tend to disproportionately recall memories from when they were aged 10 to 30. Well, I was 26 in 1994 and 15 in 1983 so does that prove the theory or not? Maybe 30 is pushing it a bit. Maybe 10-21 is more like it? Or maybe I don’t recall “Living In The Sunshine” because it’s utterly forgettable crap? The only notable thing about this performance is the Punch and Judy show. Not sure that would be allowed these days or are they just dancing together in which case maybe it would? Is this is the one and only case of a Punch and Judy prop being used on the show? I think there’s one in the video for “Look Of Love” by ABC and Mud had that ventriloquist dummy for “Lonely Thus Christmas” didn’t they but not a Punch and Judy. Even Marillion didn’t gave that and they had a song called “Punch and Judy”!

Julian is getting into his stride now (literally) as he walks across the stage in front of the next artist whilst they have already started their song, salaciously referring to testosterone and pectorals but then it is a boy band he’s talking about and as he says, “what else is there?”. Bad Boys Inc were onto their fifth of six hit singles by this point and this one – “Take Me Away (I’ll Follow You)” – would prove to be their second biggest when it peaked at No 15. Dearie me though, this was so depressingly average, even by boy band standards. They really were the dregs of that particular genre and that’s allowing for the fact that the 90s were full of sub par, wannabe hopefuls looking to be the next Take That. The song is so piss weak and sounds like it was written in about the same amount of time it’s taken Julian Clary to get his make up touched up which we playfully get to see whilst Bad Boys Inc are on stage. Apparently Bad Boy Ally Begg (the one in the white long sleeved shirt) went onto become a sports TV presenter and doesn’t really like to talk about his time as a boy band member – his website glosses over that period of his life saying if you want to know about it then just Google Bad Boys Inc. He’s right to be ashamed.

Oh god! This is yet another song that takes me right back to the Summer of 1994 when I was selling loads of it during an unhappy stint working at the Our Price store in Piccadilly, Manchester. Even just seeing the single’s cover in its Wikipedia entry is giving me the fear. “Regulate” by Warren G and Nate Dogg spent eight consecutive weeks inside the Top 10 peaking at No 5 and was taken from the soundtrack to the film Above The Rim. Part of the emerging West Coast G-funk scene, Warren G hung with his hounds Snoop Doggy Dogg and Nate Dogg and was also the half brother of Dr. Dre so I guess we shouldn’t have been surprised that he would bag himself an enormous hit before too long. What was a surprise though, given all those rap connections, was that his hit was predominantly based around a classic soft rock track. “I Keep Forgettin’ (Every Time You’re Near)” had been a No 4 US hit for yacht rocker Michael McDonald in 1982 (not that anyone was using that term back then) but somehow it was able to be recycled for a classic gangsta funk track. Just to make it stand out even more, its intro samples some dialogue from the 1988 film Young Guns, specifically around the Lincoln County Regulators, a deputised posse that fought in the Lincoln County War in the late 19th century and from which the track took its name. The video shown here includes clips from Above The Rim which featured Tupac Shakur just to up the content on the rapper-o-meter for this track as if it needed any more.

“Regulate” was a smash all around the globe leading to Warren G cranking out another five hits in the UK alone including a couple of No 2s before the decade was out. He missed a trick though by not forming a supergroup called G-Force alongside Ali G, Kenny G and Stevie G.

As announced at the top of the show by the lead singer in that direct to camera slot, The Grid are back on the show for a third time I believe with their mega hit “Swamp Thing” As with their previous appearances, they’re doing exactly the same performance with the banjo player stuck under a space age hairdryer or something. They could have thought of a different staging for a third appearance couldn’t they?

Some 29 years on from this huge track, another dance phenomenon has entered social parlance but this time around it’s not The Grid but ‘The Griddy’*

*With thanks to my teenage son for alerting me to this.

The profusion of reggae fusion chart hits that started in 1993 with the likes of Shaggy and Bitty McLean was still going strong over 12 months later. One of its least worthy proponents was this guy – C. J. Lewis – who’d already had success with his No 3 cover of “Sweets For My Sweet” some months earlier and now he was at it again by desecrating the classic Stevie Wonder song “Uptight (Everything’s Alright)”.

C.J. (real name Stephen James Lewis so shouldn’t that be S. J. Lewis?) tries to make the song his own (to quote Louis Walsh) by reordering the words in the title to read “Everything Is Alright (Uptight)”. Yeah, that’s worked a treat mate. This is just a horrible abomination. C.J. spends most of his time toasting “Ribidibidoo-badey” to a bemused looking studio audience who shuffle about pretending to dance for the duration of the song. Compare it with this TOTP performance of the original by Stevie and…well, there is no comparison.

Two years on from this, the song was in the news again when Oasis recorded “Step Out” and were asked for 6% royalties by Wonder due to its similarities to “Uptight (Everything’s Alright)”. The Manc lads didn’t want to do that so removed it from the track listing for their second album “(What’s The Story) Morning Glory?”. When it did appear as an extra track on the “Don’t Look Back In Anger” single, it included a credit for Wonder alongside co-songwriters Sylvia Moy and Henry Cosby.

I think Julian Clary has kept it the right side of respectable so far given the restrictions of the 9 o’clock watershed but he can’t help himself when doing the link to The B–52’s and their “(Meet) The Flintstones” single banging on about sniffing loincloths and having a gay old time. Well, I guess that was what he was invited on for. A second Flintstones film came out in 2000 called The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas but none of the stars of the 1994 original reprised their roles. The brand new cast couldn’t replicate the success of its predecessor and it completely bombed at the box office. In a nice (if tenuous) little connection to this edition of TOTP, the second film featured Joan Collins in the supporting cast. Joan Collins? Julian Clary? The Joan Collins Fan Club? Oh, please yourselves!

It’s time for some rockin’ next courtesy of Skin. What was it with all these British rock bands of the 90s that they all wanted to be the next Led Zeppelin? That certainly seemed to be the case with the lead singers who were all intent on doing their best Robert Plant impression (I’m ignoring Julian’s comment about all that hair in show making them look like Tammy Wynette!). “Tower Of Strength” was the band’s second Top 40 entry of the year following “The Money EP”, it was also the second hit in 1994 to have the title “Tower Of Strength”. The first had been the rerelease of The Mission’s single that had originally been a No 12 hit in 1988. It made No 33 the second time around.

It got me thinking about the phrase and its origins which are religious in nature with it usually being reserved for God in the Bible. Its usage changed to referring to religious faith in general when Tennyson used the phrase to compare the Duke of Wellington to God. However, it was Shakespeare who changed its meaning to the one we understand today when he used it in Richard III. Blimey! Bit of culture there! Musically, there have been two other chart entries of a song called “Tower Of Strength” and both were in the charts at the same time in late 1961 so I’m guessing they were different versions of the same song – one by somebody called Gene McDaniels but by far the bigger hit was by Frankie Vaughan who went all the way to No 1. As for Skin, it sounds to me like they’ve pinched the melody from “Lean On Me” by Bill Withers which I suppose makes some sort of sense. “Tower Of Strength”? “Lean On Me”? Same sort of thing isn’t it? Oh please yourselves (again)!

Before Ant and Dec were the TV behemoths that we know today, they were of course PJ & Duncan, characters from BBC teen drama Byker Grove who went on to be actual pop stars after performing as the fictional band Grove Matrix in the show. It was almost Monkees-esque. The song they performed in the show was called “Tonight I’m Free” and was the duo’s first actual single release in 1993 but it failed to chart. Second single “Why Me?” did crack the Top 40 but it was third single “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble” that will always be what people remember about their career as pop stars. Ridiculous and, indeed ridiculed, it was also catchy as hell based around the catchphrase of US boxing and wrestling ring announcer Michael’s Buffer. The addition of the ‘h’ in ‘Rhumble’ was to avoid copyright issues as Buffer had trademarked the phrase. The lyric “Watch us wreck the mike PSYCHE!” far outlives anything else they released and they released a lot of stuff – three studio albums and fifteen singles! There’s also a line that gave a big indication as to their future careers though we couldn’t possibly have known at the time. “I’m Ant (I’m Declan), a duo, a twosome” they…erm…rap? They would eventually rebrand themselves as Ant & Dec whilst still recording music (specifically thejr third album – “The Cult Of Ant & Dec”) before giving it up in 1997.

There were two different versions of the CD single so to differentiate between them in the Piccadilly Our Price, the singles buyer wrote on the masterbags “Twat” (Dec/ Duncan) and “Twat in a hat” (Ant / PJ). When I got transferred to the Our Price in Stockport in the new year, it turned out that the album the staff had played most on the shop stereo had been PJ & Duncan’s “Psyche” and that their favourite track was one called “She Scores A Perfect Ten”. Want to hear it? Sure you do…

Hmm. It’s got a bit of an East 17 “Deep” vibe so better than I would have expected. Also better than expected are the lads moves in this TOTP performance – talk about in sync! PSYCHE!

We’ve reached eight weeks at the top for Wet Wet Wet with “Love Is All Around”. By this point they had drawn level with Shakespear’s Sister and The Archies in terms of length of time as the UK No 1 knowing that one more would see them replicate Frankie Goes To Hollywood, Wings and John Travolta and Olivia Newton John. The sixteen weeks of Bryan Adams was still a way off though. Were we thinking it could be challenged at this point or did we believe that common sense must kick in soon?

The play out song is “Trouble” by Shampoo. Now they might seem like a small footnote in the history of pop music and they may have only had five Top 40 hits none of which got higher than No 11 and their four albums didn’t sell anywhere except Japan but…there is still so much love for this pair online and I know people who swear by them.

Jacqui Blake and Carrie Askew were school friends from Plumstead, London who ran a fanzine for Manic Street Preachers and somehow became pop stars themselves. The TOTP producers managed to get them as the last act on this show but the first on the next so I’ll keep my powder (and hair) dry for the moment before delving into the Shampoo story in the next post.

So how did Julian Clary do as host? I think he brought something different to the show and I liked how he shook up the presenting format with his walks across stage and shots of him ‘dancing’ and the pretence of him having his make up retouched mid song. However, it all seemed a bit tame on reflection. I guess he was never going to do a Norman Lamont pre watershed though.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Clubhouse	Living In The Sunshine	No
2	Bad Boys Inc	Take Me Away (I’ll Follow You)	As if
3	Warren G and Nate Dogg	Regulate	I did not
4	The Grid	Swamp Thing	It’s a no from me
5	C. J. Lewis	Everything Is Alright (Uptight)	Never
6	The B-52’s	(Meet) The Flintstones	Nope
7	Skin	Tower Of Strength	Nah
8	PJ and Duncan	Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble	Negative
9	Wet Wet Wet	Love Is All Around	Didn’t happen
10	Shampoo	Trouble	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001l56h/top-of-the-pops-21071994

TOTP 30 JUN 1994

Posted on April 19, 2023 by 80stastic

Despite my recent outrage at the omnipresence of Eurodance in the UK charts in the mid 90s (and therefore also on TOTP), I’m sure if I did some proper statistical analysis of the musical genres represented on the show, it would tell me that the mix of categories was eclectic. No, not eclectic but mad, bonkers, all over the place. Tonight’s show is a prime example. Yes, there are plenty of dance tunes (of varying quality) but there’s also some out and out pop, an exponent of the New Wave of New Wave (whatever that was), the debut of a rock ‘n’ roll band (definitely not indie…erm…maybe) who would dominate the 90s, a mega selling cover of an old 60s tune and hell, even a memorable No 1 from 1979! What a basket case of a show! The host is Bruno Brookes who I have to say I have warmed to since his return to the programme after the ‘year zero’ revamp era. I couldn’t be doing with him during his 80s pomp but compared to Simon ‘Smug’ Mayo, I’m finding his matey presenting style a bit more acceptable.

First up is a tune that I reviewed as part of the TOTP that was broadcast on 29 July 1993. Back then, “Caught In The Middle” by Juliet Roberts was a Breaker but as that section doesn’t exist anymore, she’s opening this show with a performance in the studio. In that first review, I drew some comparisons with Shara Nelson who was also on that day but there’s no Shara this time round so I’ll have to think of something else to say. Well, back in 1993, the single made No 24 and was produced by Danny D (of D-Mob fame) and remixed by Roger Sanchez. However, a David Morales remix that lit up the dance floors of clubs in 1994 demanded a release of its own and so it was that it was put out again, this time peaking at No 14. What are the differences between the two versions? I’m afraid my lack of dance music knowledge embarrasses me here but the Morales remix does seem to have a faster bpm which requires some controlled breathing and singing techniques from Juliet to get through it. This would prove to be Juliet’s biggest ever hit and she has not released any material since 2002 though she remains in demand as a backing singer.

That pure pop record next as Let Loose are finally given free rein to showcase themselves to the UK at large. I say ‘finally’ as they’d actually been around Take That style for over a year before this appearance and their single – “Crazy” – had originally been released back in April of 1993. It had just missed the Top 40 then but their record label Mercury obviously believed in the song and so it was re-released with a big promotional push and a chart entry at No 24 was achieved. There then followed a climb that was becoming most atypical within the UK Top 40 around this time whereby the single rose in small increments five weeks on the trot to get a foothold on the No 4 position. The story didn’t end there though. It stayed within the Top 10 for a further six weeks including two at No 2 when only the extraordinary sales of Wet Wet Wet kept it off the top spot. In total, it spent sixteen weeks inside the Top 40 and nine inside the Top 10. Perhaps most remarkable of all was that it would become the UK’s eighth best selling single of 1994, shifting more copies than D:Ream’s “Things Can Only Get Better” which spent four weeks at No 1 at the start of the year.

How can all this be explained? Well, it was supremely radio friendly becoming a staple of daytime playlists to the point that the band’s lead singer himself – Richie Wermerling – had this to say of the song (courtesy of @TOTPFacts):

Let Loose lead singer Richie Wermerling wrote "Crazy For You": "It was around for months and even I had to turn off the radio after a while. It used to come on everywhere I was – sometimes I'd have to hide behind counters in supermarkets." #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) April 7, 2023

The single’s success led to the re-release of another early single (“Seventeen”) which though nowhere near the sales phenomenon of its predecessor made a respectable No 11. Despite being pin up material and playing catchy pop music, Let Loose were never going to seriously worry Take That as the nation’s favourite boy band. The position of contender for that role would be filled by Boyzone come the end of the year. However, they did notch up seven Top 40 hits over two years before disbanding.

And here it is. The inevitable appearance of some nasty dance music in the form of Reel 2 Real featuring The Mad Stuntman. After the gravity defying chart run of “I Like To Move It” that remained aloft in the Top 40 for seventeen weeks, there were no surprises for guessing how main man Erick Morillo would follow it up. Just chuck out something that sounds exactly the same! What to call it? Something with the word ‘move’ in the title will do again. No need to overthink it. Just shameless. The ‘lyrics’ to “Go On Move” bang on about women shaking their bodies and then there’s some nonsensical scatting at the start. Look at this:

Bibidy, bom bi bom, mek, house go mad
Bibidy, bom bi bom, mek, jazz go mad
Bibidy, bom bi bom, mek, house go mad
Bibidy, bom bi bom, mek, jazz go mad
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Erick A. Morillo / Mark H. Quashie / Peter Tulloch
Go on Move lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Warner Chappell Music, Inc

The use of the word ‘Bibidy’ isn’t inspired by the “Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo” song from Disney’s Cinderella animation but, according to my research, a Jamaican term for men’s underwear. Nice. In trade publication Music Week, reviewer James Hamilton described it as:

“Gruff ragga ‘g’wan move’ shouting and ‘blippily bebop’ scatting drily percussive ‘I Like To Move It’ type bogie shuffler”
Hamilton, James (June 25, 1994). “Dj directory” (PDF). Music Week, in Record Mirror (Dance Update Supplemental Insert). p. 5. Retrieved April 18, 2021.

That just about sums up this whole shoddy affair. Somehow, the good old British public bought enough copies to send it to No 7. Thanks for that.

It’s that No 1 from 1979 next. Surely one of the most memorable chart toppers ever, “I Don’t Like Mondays” was the second consecutive No 1 single for The Boomtown Rats after “Rat Trap” the year before. They were the biggest band in the UK. I was only 11 at the time and not exactly in tune with current chart trends but even I knew this song and The Boomtown Rats. The elder brother of a kid I knew up the street was a big fan. Not that I knew it at the time but so was my wife who asked her parents for their “Tonic For The Troops” album for Christmas ‘78 (they bought her “Nightflight To Venus” by Boney M instead).

By 1981 though, the hits had started to dry up. The New Romantics movement was in ascendancy with blousy young heroes like Spandau Ballet and Duran Duran capturing the nation’s imagination and The Rats were seen as old hat. By 1984 they were completely washed up. And then came that news report from Ethiopia that Bob Geldof couldn’t ignore leading to the Band Aid record and the Live Aid concert and that moment when he sings the line “And the lesson today is how to die”…

Go to 3:08 for that moment

The origins of the lyrics of the whole song are well documented of course. The school shooting in San Diego by 16 year old Brenda Spencer who fired at children in a school playground because, by her own words, “I don’t like Mondays. This livens the day up” is pretty bleak source material. Geldof couldn’t have known that just a few years later it would provide an iconic moment in rock history as part of an effort to use the power of music for the good of humanity.

* For my full review of Live Aid, follow the link below:

https://80spop.wordpress.com/2018/04/04/live-aid-13-jul-1985/(opens in a new tab)

None of the above explains why “I Don’t Like Mondays” was back in the charts in 1994 though. It was a pretty obvious reason in truth. A Boomtown Rats / Bob Geldof retrospective Best Of album entitled “Loudmouth” had been released and the track was re-released to promote it. The album made the Top 10 though the single only made No 38 so I’m a little surprised that it warranted a whole slot to itself. It would have been a Breaker under the old regime no doubt.

The moment has finally arrived. It wouldn’t be 1994 – the year Britpop took off according to many – without them. Stand by (me) for the time has arrived for the TOTP debut of Oasis! Working in a record shop in the centre of Manchester at the time, it was kind of hard to avoid Liam, Noel and co but I have to say I’d not got on board immediately. Whilst some of my work colleagues were all over debut single “Supersonic”, I was picking fault in their rhyming of Elsa with Alka-Seltzer in the lyrics. Second single “Shakermaker” didn’t quite do it for me either but by the time third release “Live Forever” came along, I could resist no longer and was all in. I’m pretty sure that I could tell that something big was brewing and I didn’t want to miss out. Record breaking debut album “Definitely Maybe” was duly purchased and eighteen months later I was at the second of their first outdoor headline gigs at Maine Road.

Back in the Summer of 1994 though, why wasn’t I immediately swept up in the Oasis tsunami? Admittedly, I had some previous when it came to ignoring huge Manchester bands just as they were breaking. The Smiths? No thanks, not poppy enough for me. The Stone Roses? Erm no. I rather like the look of Scottish rockers Gun instead. And so to Oasis. Why didn’t I watch this TOTP performance and think “Sign me up. I’m totally here for this”? Was I put off by the Genesis apeing practice of having drummer Tony McCarroll centre stage? It’s interesting to note that the focal point of the group Liam and Noel are furthest away from the stage here. Presumably that was deliberate but it seems out of character. Rather more predictably, poor old Bonehead and Guigsy hardly get a look in.

“Shakermaker” would peak at No 11, considerably higher than “Supersonic” (No 31) so we should have all been on alert at this point to the rise of the band. Although it would continue to sell throughout the next few years along with the band’s other singles (we were still regularly ordering copies of all of them for years), it remains the band’s only single released from their first two albums not to be certified gold.

Another dance tune now but I didn’t expect this one to sound like it does. Crystal Waters burst into the charts in 1991 with the hypnotic house sound of “Gypsy Woman” (“La da dee, la dee da”) but this single “Ghetto Day” (a double A- side with “What I Need”) sounds like something off Betty Boo’s second album. Seriously, it sounds like “Let Me Take You There” doesn’t it? She even seems to have changed her hair to a Boo style bob. It turned out though that the record buying public weren’t too keen on the Betty Boo version of Crystal Waters and, despite this appearance, the single got no higher than this week’s chart position of No 40. To be fair, the record buying public hadn’t been too keen on this Betty Boo version of Betty Boo so Crystal had no chance.

The New Wave of New Wave was a terrible name for a musical movement but then so was Britpop I guess. Unlike the latter, it didn’t live long in the memory either. So what was it and who was in it? Well, it pretty much did what it said on the tin. Bands that played guitar driven rock music that had post punk and new wave influences. And its exponents? Well, one of the main bands of the movement were These Animal Men whose name I remember but whose sound I do not. I’m guessing though that it was similar to S*M*A*S*H who were the first band of that sub genre to appear on TOTP the other week. Initially, there were other names associated with the New Wave of New Wave but as that scene petered out and Britpop became the dominant force, it was the latter that they became known for. I’m talking about Sleeper, Echobellly, Shed Seven and Elastica amongst others.

The only thing I can recall of These Animal Men was that they released an EP called “Taxi For These Animal Men”. So was a taxi required? Let’s have a listen to “Speeed King” then…

As I thought, they sound like S*M*A*S*H with maybe a bit of Menswear thrown in though I think they had a bit more to them than this These Animal Men who seemed to peddle a very specific (dare I say one trick pony) style of music. Host Bruno Brookes introduces them as being the ‘TOTP showcase’ which seems to have been another way of saying “this lot don’t have any hits but we’ve shoved them on the show to prove how hip we are”. “Speeed King” got no higher than No 95 and These Animal Men were done and dusted by 1998 when they split.

The Grid again? Is this the third outing for “Swamp Thing”? Despite this being a brand new performance, it’s basically exactly the same as they did the last time they were on including the rather odd set up for the banjo player. This single was one of a number that just sold and sold that Summer alongside Let Loose, Aswad and of course Wet Wet Wet. I must have sold hundreds of copies of those titles to the punters in the Manchester Piccadilly Our Price store where I was working at the time. One day I served a guy who asked if he could have discount on what he was buying. As there was no valid reason for his request I replied in the negative. He then came back with “I’m asking you politely for discount” to which I again replied “No”. My customer then advised me that he knew people who would come and kneecap me if I didn’t do as he wanted. It was that kind of place. A swamp thing? More like a cesspit of humanity. For the record, I still didn’t give him any discount and nobody did turn up to kneecap me.

Wet Wet Wet remain steadfastly secure in the No 1 spot with “Love Is All Around”. To try and mix things up a bit, TOTP have got hold of a piece of footage from a concert the band did at Wembley that week and show that instead of another studio performance or the video.

In the clip, Marti Pellow has a curious affectation where he twirls around making a welcoming gesture which put me in mind of Stephen Rea’s turn in Interview With A Vampire:

I’d have to say that Marti has a better smile than a vampire though.

The play out song is “Living In The Sunshine” by Clubhouse. The follow up to “Light My Fire”, ah…really though…who cares? Certainly not me.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Juliet Roberts	Caught In The Middle	Nope
2	Let Loose	Crazy	No but I think my wife succumbed to its charms
3	Reel 2 Real featuring The Mad Stuntman	Go On Move	Never!
4	The Boomtown Rats	I Don’t Like Mondays	No but I must have it on something surely?
5	Oasis	Shakermaker	Not the single but I bought there album. Didn’t we all?
6	Crystal Waters	Ghetto Day / What I Need	Nah
7	These Animal Men	Speeed King	No
8	The Grid	Swamp Thing	I did not
9	Wet Wet Wet	Love Is All Around	And no
10	Clubhouse	Living In The Sunshine	As if

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001krcc/top-of-the-pops-30061994

TOTP 16 JUN 1994

Posted on April 13, 2023 by 80stastic

It’s the middle of June 1994 and before we get started on this week’s TOTP, it’s time I popped back into my personal life to see what I was up to back then. After three moves in four months at work, I’d ended up back where I’d started my career at Our Price at the Market Street store in Manchester. Despite being apprehensive initially, I’d kind of settled into being back there and was about to clock up a solid six months when everything changed again. The store manager took me aside one day and told me that he’d got a job at HMV (traitor!) and would be leaving soon. Fair play, good luck to him and all that but his change of employer would have ramifications for me.

The manager asked to replace him was my old boss at the Market Street store who I liked and so I had no concerns about him coming in. Unfortunately, he had some concerns about me. It was nothing personal but he was overseeing the start up of two new Our Price stores at Manchester airport and would continue with that as well as managing the Market Street branch. As such, he wouldn’t be around that much and wanted a more experienced Assistant Manager than me in place and so a guy from down South who wanted a move up North was transferred into my position.

So where did that leave me? Area management shunted me up the road to the Piccadilly store. It was my worst nightmare come true. The Piccadilly store had quite the reputation for a…let’s say ‘colourful’ clientele. In other words it’s where all the scallies and shoplifters hung out. They employed a full time security guard there (we didn’t have one at Market Street). Plus, they were a single floor store and the trading area was massive which made it hard to police plus a lot of work to make it look appealing to customers. We had two floors at Market Street but they were much smaller in size and much more manageable. To say I wasn’t keen on going there was an understatement. Somebody jokingly wrote in my leaving card that he’d heard they’d installed gun turrets at Piccadilly to control the scallies. Gulp! In the end, I lasted about five months in Piccadilly and hated nearly every minute. Not long after I arrived, the security guard left and a new guy came in. I’d had a look in the previous incumbent’s security log one day and it was full of entries that just said ‘nothing to report’. My experience of the store couldn’t have been further removed from that assessment. The new security bloke was shit hot at catching shoplifters and I spent most of my days sat with him and his latest capture in the shop kitchen waiting for the police to arrive. The previous guy had worn a security outfit and spent most his time chatting to the staff as far as I could see. This new fella wore ‘undercover’ clothes and loved nothing more than apprehending thieves and there seemed to be lots of them to catch. I just wanted to sell some records to punters. I didn’t want any of this. My time there will probably influence my opinions on the songs on TOTP for the next few months as most of them I associate with my miserable experience in Piccadilly. You have been warned.

Right. With all that said, it’s time for the show and we have another ‘golden mic’ guest presenter this week in the form of Angus Deayton. You remember him. The gangly looking bloke who hosted Have I Got News For You and was in One Foot In The Grave as Victor Meldrew’s neighbour. Whatever happened to him? Well, the short answer is cocaine and prostitutes. In May 2002, The News Of The World exposed his extra curricular activities leading to an excruciating appearance on HIGNFY where he was mercilessly teased by Paul Merton and Ian Hislop. After more allegations in the October, Deayton was dismissed from the show and despite continuing to work in TV and radio, his media profile has never been as high since. Back in 1994 though, his choice as TOTP host made perfect sense. He was a confident presenter and his suave demeanour even led to him being labelled as ‘TV’s Mr Sex’ in Time Out magazine. Oh the irony.

The first act Deayton has to introduce are The Grid who are riding high in the charts with their hit “Swamp Thing”. There’s a lot going on in this performance and most of it is pretty weird. I have to start with the banjo player who is hooked up to some machinery which is giving me heavy A Clockwork Orange vibes, specifically the scene where Alex undergoes aversion therapy with his eyes pulled permanently open. Then there’s the guy who seems to have fashioned himself a crown of safety pins. Finally, the fact that everyone on stage is dressed head to toe in white and safety pin guy has the slogan ‘No pain, no gain’ in big black letters on his top makes it all look like you’re watching Wham! performing “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go” in their ‘Choose Life’ T-shirts but if you were coming down from a bad trip. As I said, decidedly weird.

Just when I thought the time of 2 Unlimited was coming to an end and despite their last single being on its way down the charts at No 32 this week, the TOTP producers have still managed to manufacture yet another slot for them to appear on the show. “No One” was a track from their album “Real Things” which, rather surprisingly to me, was the No 1 album this particular week. It would eventually be released as a single three months later and peaked at No 17 which presents the frightening prospect of it being on the show again a few weeks down the line. For all the accusations against them that their songs all sounded the same, this one was slightly different. I mean, it wasn’t a big ballad or anything but it didn’t t seem to have that 2 Unlimited bpm urgency. In fact, it sounds like any other Eurodance hit of the time which wasn’t a good thing either in my book. Oh, and what was with the oversized wrap around glasses the backing band are wearing? Was it meant to represent anonymity, as in ‘No One’. I’m probably overthinking it which I doubt 2 Unlimited did.

It’s the video for “Anytime You Need A Friend” by Mariah Carey next. You may recall that she flew over to appear on the show in person to perform the song the other week. Wikipedia informs me that this was the first promo in which Mariah has straightened hair as opposed to her cascading curls. And the world was never the same again.

Talking of world altering events, an NHS choir called Breathe Harmony recorded a version of the song during the COVID-19 pandemic with contributions from over 100 staff recorded at home on mobile phones that were put together into one video. That film came to the attention of Mariah herself who tweeted that it had brought tears to her eyes (in a good way). The recording was eventually released as a single to raise money for two NHS charities. Mariah’s original peaked at No 8 in the UK.

Finally a D:Ream hit that isn’t a re-release of a previous single. After “Things Can Only Get Better” (once) and “U R The Best Thing” (twice) had been given the re-release treatment to great effect realising No 1 and No 4 hits respectively, here comes “Take Me Away”. However, like its predecessors, it was a track on the band’s debut album “D:Ream On Volume 1”. Truth be told, it’s not a great song and this was reflected in its chart peak of No 18. It probably should gave remained an album track. Peter Cunnah sounds ever so slightly out of breath doing a live vocal here and he’s also not wearing his trademark chequered suit. Maybe the two are related – no suit equals laboured vocals, like Samson and his lack of strength once his hair was cut off.

Professor Brian Cox watch update: That’s not him again is it?

Twice in the same show?! After pulling a fast one to get 2 Unlimited on the show once more, the TOTP producers have done the same again for Toni Braxton. Not content with having been a regular on the show for the whole of 1994, Ric Blaxill and co have come up with a way of squeezing her into the running order despite not having a single that was in the charts at the time. Again like 2 Unlimited before her, “Love Shoulda Brought You Home” would would eventually be released from her album and become a No 33 hit. Unlike 2 Unlimited, the song was actually her debut single release (in the US) back in 1992. It also appeared on the soundtrack to the Eddie Murphy movie Boomerang alongside Boyz II Men’s “End Of The Road”.

As for the performance here, is this the first time Toni has been in the TOTP studio in person? In the past she seems to have done a lot of those live by satellite turns. A more pertinent question though might be why has she been styled to look like Halle Berry in the film version of The Flintstones?

We do have a live by satellite performance next but as Toni Braxton was over in the UK anyway, the slot has gone to Spin Doctors who are showcasing their song “Cleopatra’s Cat”, the lead single from their sophomore album “Turn It Upside Down”. I don’t wish to be unkind but this was utterly pointless from start to finish. Firstly, the song is dreadful – it sounds like it was worked up out of a noodling jam session and some nonsensical lyrics were overlaid as a guide vocal. Ah yes the lyrics – some meandering bollocks about Roman general Mark Antony not being able to outwit the cat of his girlfriend Cleopatra, the ruler of Egypt from 51 to 30 BC. I’m sure it’s probably a metaphor for something but really, who cares? It was certainly no “Two Princes”.

Secondly, theres the staging of it. How we were meant to get excited about seeing some disheveled hippy types performing on a boat on the East River surrounded by some skyscrapers, I’m not sure. “Cleopatra’s Cat” peaked at No 29 and was their last UK Top 40 hit.

Still with Chaka Demus and Pliers? In the Summer of 1994? Fear not though as “I Wanna Be Your Man” would be their penultimate UK Top 40 hit. Yet another track from their “Tease Me” album, this one is nothing to do with the Lennon -McCartney song recorded by both The Beatles and The Rolling Stones but rather is the usual staple we’d come to expect from the duo with Pliers singing about a “sexy lady”and getting the “cherry from the cherry tree” before Chaka Demus blows in like a foghorn with his toasting. He even begins with a “Here me know” – please spare us.

After one final hit with “Gal Wine”, they would try (and fail) to score a further hit in 1996 with a cover of “Every Kinda People” by Robert Palmer talking of whom…

I don’t think Robert Palmer had been on TOTP since he performed his Marvin Gaye mashup hit “Mercy Mercy Me / I Want You” in 1990. The most likely reason for this would be that he hadn’t had any UK Top 40 hits since then and this new single “Girl U Want” would not reverse that trend peaking at No 57. So why was he on the show then?Maybe it was a change of direction brought in by new producer Ric Blaxill where the artist’s name and fame was considered bigger and more important than their chart position? In any case, it fitted in with the unconventionality of this particular show being, as it was, the third song on that wasn’t a current hit single after 2 Unlimited and Toni Braxton.

I didn’t know until now that this was actually a cover of a track by US New Wavers Devo but it is although it’s definitely been given the Palmer treatment. He’s made it sound like a companion piece to his 1988 song “Simply Irresistible” which is no bad thing in my book. Bob looks as suave as ever in this performance though I do wonder if many of the youths in the studio audience had a clue who he was. Tragically, Palmer would be dead in nine years from a heart attack.

Right, how many weeks are we up to for Wet Wet Wet’s version of “Love Is All Around” being at No 1? Three is it? Just another twelve to go after this then! Maybe it’s time to discuss the original recording of the song now. Asked to name any songs by The Troggs, I’d have got “Wild Thing” and “Love Is All Around” and probably nothing else. It turns out though that in addition to those two, they had another six Top 40 hits between 1966 and 1968 including a No 1 (“With A Girl Like You”). After that point, the hits quickly vanished and a reluctance to tour in the US until 1968 meant they failed to consolidate on the success of “Wild Thing” topping the charts over there.

Changes of record label failed to improve the band’s commercial fortunes and even resorting to the extreme option of re-recording “Wild Thing” with Oliver Reed and Alex Higgins failed to make a splash (if you don’t count Reed’s infamous drunken promotional appearance on The Word). They did, however, earn some credibility points when they recorded an album with REM called “Athens Andover” in the early 90s. The collaboration came about after Michael Stipe and co had covered “Love Is All Around” in concert. Wanna hear it? OK then…

Better than the Wets version? I’ll leave that for you to decide. Troggs lead singer Reg Presley famously spent the royalties from it on researching crop circles and UFOs releasing his findings in a book published in 2002 called Wild Things They Don’t Tell Us.

The play out song this week is another cover version – “Word Up” as done by Gun. Originally a hit for Cameo in 1986 of course, these Scottish rockers recorded it for the lead single of their third album “Swagger” to reactivate a career which had stalled rather since their debut hit “Better Days” in 1989. As we have seen so many times in these TOTP reviews, cover versions are a great way of securing a chart hit when one is needed and so it was with “Word Up” which gave Gun their biggest ever hit when it made No 8. I always quite liked their rock-tastic take on the track but I would have sworn it came out later in the decade than 1994. Five years on, Mel B also had a hit with a cover of “Word Up” taking her version to No 13.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	The Grid	Swamp Thing	No
2	2 Unlimited	No One	As if
3	Mariah Carey	Anytime You Need A Friend	Nah
4	D:Ream	Take Me Away	I did not
5	Toni Braxton	Love Shoulda Brought You Home	Nope
6	Spin Doctors	Cleopatra’s Cat	No chance
7	Chaka Demus and Pliers	I Wanna Be Your Man	Never happening
8	Robert Palmer	Girl U Want	Negative
9	Wet Wet Wet	Love Is All Around	I didn’t
10	Gun	Word Up	Liked it, didn’t buy it

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001kkll/top-of-the-pops-16061994

TOTP 02 JUN 1994

Posted on April 5, 2023 by 80stastic

I’m nearly 26! Well, I’m not (I’ll be 55 next birthday) but back in 1994 I was four days from being that age. I know it’s a daft thing to say because 29 years is a long time but it feels like a lifetime ago. The memory is such a mysterious beast though. Certain things that I would have been able to reel off without hesitation at the time like the names on the staff rota I can now no longer raise from the depths of my recollection. Neither can I tell you what I did on my birthday that year. Yet, random snatches of conversation (that shouldn’t have been that memorable!) have lingered and endured. I wonder if I’ll remember all the songs from this TOTP…

N.B. The host this week is yet again the insufferable Simon Mayo who has his full weaponry of obscure and hopelessly unfunny one liners on display. I don’t propose to comment on every one as I have done previously as he doesn’t deserve the attention but be sure that they were all of his usual woeful standard.

Yep, this one’s in the old memory banks. Giving the reggae treatment to pop standards was quite the trend around this time and the latest act to jump on the bandwagon were Big Mountain who scored a massive hit with their version of Peter Frampton’s “Baby I Love Your Way”. The perennial appeal of this song seems quite disproportionate to its quality to me. Not only was a live version of it a hit for Frampton himself in 1976 but it returned in 1988 as part of a medley with “Freebird” by Will To Power which went to the top of the US charts. And here it was again in 1994 only being held off the UK No 1 spot by Wet Wet Wet. Just like “Love Is All Around”, Big Mountain’s version was from a film soundtrack, Reality Bites starring Winona Ryder, Ethan Hawke and Ben Stiller.

I’ve talked about this film before because someone has to as it seems to be largely forgotten these days. Reflecting the angst of the Generation X demographic and channeling the grunge scene vibe (and I know that makes it sound really wanky!), it told the story of a group of friends and roommates whilst also breaking the fourth wall (sort of) with the character of TV network executive Michael (Ben Stiller). Supposedly, it now holds cult classic status but you never see it on TV or any of the streaming platforms. The soundtrack is actually pretty fab including the likes of Crowded House, Squeeze, U2, Lenny Kravitz and World Party. It was also home to another runaway hit in “Stay (I Missed You)” by the then unsigned Lisa Loeb And Nine Stories which was a US No 1 and UK No 6.

Back to “Baby I Love Your Way” though and I have to say I found the Big Mountain version a bit sickly and twee. I wasn’t the only person who wasn’t a fan of the song when it featured in another film…

The Beautiful South burst onto the UK charts with a nest full of big hits after the break up of The Housemartins. Their first four singles released between June 1989 and September 1990 furnished them with chart positions that included No 1, No 2 and No 8. However, of their next seven releases, none got any higher than No 16 and three didn’t make the Top 40 at all despite all of them being quality tunes (bloody stupid British record buying public). Now I’m not suggesting that the band looked at this and thought “let’s release a cover version to arrest this trend” but that is what happened. “Everybody’s Talkin’” came to fame via the version recorded by Harry Nilsson that featured in the film Midnight Cowboy and was a perfect choice to be given The Beautiful South treatment. Possessing of a delicate, fluttering melody, it was also a great showcase for the vocal talents of the recently recruited Jacqui Abbott. I think this may have been her first ever TOTP appearance which may explain her rather nervous looking demeanour.

“Everybody’s Talkin’” gave the band their biggest hit since their 1990 No 1 “A Little Time” when it peaked at No 12. A year after this they recorded another cover version, this time their take on The Mamas & The Papas hit “Dream A Little Dream” for the soundtrack of the film French Kiss. I’m pretty sure that it didn’t get a UK release as a single which caused record shop staff issues when trying to explain this to annoyed punters who had seen the film. The song being picked up for airplay by local radio stations didn’t help either. The band recorded a whole album of cover versions in 2004 called “Golddiggas, Headnodders and Pholk Songs” which would provide them with their final Top 40 hit in “This Will Be Our Year”. The Beautiful South split in 2007 famously citing ‘musical similarities’.

Another one that I definitely remember now which is surprising given it’s a dance tune but “Swamp Thing” by The Grid was no ordinary dance record – this one had a banjo in it! Dave Ball (ex- Soft Cell of course) and Richard Norris weren’t exactly new to the UK Top 40 having previously visited its mid echelons with “Crystal Clear” and “Texas Cowboys” but “Swamp Thing” was by far their biggest hit reaching a nose bleed inducing No 3. Apparently, the banjo part wasn’t a sample having been played specifically by folk musician Roger Dinsdale though there were a couple of sampled spoken word bits in there. It was for all intents and purposes though, an instrumental track which maybe makes its commercial success more surprising. Maybe.

The accompanying video with the baby crawling about amongst some synthesiser instruments and equipment puts me in mind of the promo for “French Kiss” (the track by Lil’ Louis not the aforementioned film) which also featured a young child playing with some toys against a white background.

Of course, if you’re talking visual clips featuring banjos, it’s hard not to think of this…

No, don’t recall this at all but that’s hardly surprising given that “Fountain Of Youth” by Arrested Development was never released as a single. This appears to be an attempt by the TOTP producers to shoehorn an international artist onto the show just because they happen to be in the country. Simon Mayo tells us in his intro that they are his guests on his Radio 1 show the following day so why not get them on the BBC’s flagship music show while we’re at it? There was a problem though. Here’s @TOTPFacts with the story:

Arrested Development's current single "Ease My Mind" was falling from its peak of 33 to 35 in this week's singles chart, which made it ineligible to appear on #TOTP under the rules of the show at the time. It was the last of their four UK top 40 singles.
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) March 24, 2023

The solution was to create a space for them using the old ‘album track slot’ trick. The album in question was “Zingalamaduni” which was released the following week. However, it wasn’t a huge success, peaking at No 16 over here and massively underselling compared to their multi platinum debut “3 Years, 5 Months And 2 Days In The Life Of…”. I can’t say that “Fountain Of Youth” does much for me and who was the old fella on the raised stage at the back? Mr. Wendal perhaps? More to the point, what was he doing? Praying to the fountain of youth? Drinking an elixir from it? Or was he just watering a plant?

I said I wouldn’t spend any time commenting on Simon Mayo’s pathetic puns in his segues but his attempt to draw humour from “Shoop” by Salt ‘N’ Pepa by restyling it as adding salt and pepper to soup is truly pitiful. Anyway, this was a rerelease of a single that peaked at No 29 in 1993 but which was given another chance in the wake of the success of “Whatta Man” with En Vogue and this time it managed a high of No 13.

It’s a pretty groovy track with the ‘Shoop’ hook an instant ear worm and infinitely preferable to the only other songs I can think of with that word in the title – Cher’s version of “The Shoop Shoop Song (It’s In His Kiss)” and “Exhale (Shoop Shoop)” by Whitney Houston.

Who couldn’t remember this? Is this the first time Pulp appeared on TOTP?*

*Yes, if you merge those two sentences then you almost get the title of Pulp’s first Top 40 hit and yes that was deliberate and yes, I’m a smart arse.

Of course, Jarvis and co had been around for a good 10 years by this point but “Babies” (the lead track from “The Sisters EP”) really did seem to draw a line under their early, rather gloomy work, and announce themselves as the coolest uncool anti-pop stars in the UK. Essentially a song about voyeurism that doesn’t end well for the protagonist, it wasn’t your typical pop song subject matter. And yet Pulp made it work and then some. Once the viewing public got a first glimpse of Jarvis and his idiosyncratic moves and looks to camera, his stardom was assured. His Bob Geldof / John Travolta style taunting of Wet Wet Wet only added to his appeal for many. Pulp had arrived.

In case you didn't catch it: taped instead Jarvis Cocker's jacket was a piece of paper with "I HATE WET WET WET" written on it – a phrase we'll all be screaming in another five or six weeks' time. #TOTP pic.twitter.com/xeCn6rDMf8
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) March 24, 2023

Well I definitely remember Pink Floyd releasing “The Division Bell” as it went to No1 in the album charts and we sold plenty of it in the Our Price shop in Manchester where I was working at the time. What I don’t recall is how it sounded as I’m pretty sure it never got played on the in store stereo (apparently record shop staff snobbiness was alive and well in 1994). Therefore, the single “Take It Back” which was taken from it is new to me. Listening to it now, I find myself asking “Is this really Pink Floyd? The Pink Floyd of “The Dark Side Of The Moon” and “The Wall” fame? because it sounds like a second rate Runrig to me.” Look, I’m no Pink Floyd devotee and I don’t own any of their albums so I may be committing heresy here but this sounds so lame. The video is awful too.

I think Mariah Carey must have been a friend of the show. How else do you explain her being on it in person so many times otherwise? “Anytime You Need a Friend” wasn’t what she said to producer Richard Blaxill when he was struggling to fill his running order but was the follow up to her recent No 1 single “Without You” and it was generally seen as a stand out track on parent album “Music Box” by critics as its gospel flavour allowed Mariah to dive deep into her record breaking vocal range. I guess it’s well produced and does a job but I’m not sure I would have remembered it without the prompt of this TOTP repeat. Mariah would see 1994 out with the release of that Christmas record which undeniably has lived longer in the memory than “Anytime You Need a Friend” and which peaked at No 8 here but was the first of her singles to miss the Top 10 in the US.

OK, so we all remember this one and some would no doubt wish that they could erase it permanently from their memories. It’s week one of fifteen at the top of the charts for Wet Wet Wet with “Love Is All Around”. My first observation of this performance would be why do they look like they’ve arrived hot foot from a production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat? Oh, it’s meant to be a hippy / summer of love / flower power type thing is it? That would explain the long hair, the flowers inserted into the necks of the guitars and the bean bags I suppose? I think they may have lost people right from the start with this staging idea. Oh well. Just another 14 weeks to go. Channel your inner Jarvis Cocker people!

Oh, one last thing. There’s no play out tune this week. Not sure if this is a permanent change but it seems like a good idea given that the producers had wasted this slot on songs that didn’t even make the Top 40 played over a montage of visuals from the show that we’d all just seen.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Big Mountain	Baby I Love Your Way	Nah
2	The Beautiful South	Everybody’s Talkin’	Not the single but I have it on their Carry On Up The Charts Best Of. Don’t we all?
3	The Grid	Swamp Thing	No
4	Arrested Development	Fountain Of Youth	My wife had their first album but a second one was a purchase too far. No
5	Salt ‘N’ Pepa	Shoop	Negative
6	Pulp	The Sisters EP	No but I had seen them live the year before supporting Saint Etienne and they were by far the better band on the night
7	Pink Floyd	Take It Back	No I won’t – this was awful
8	Mariah Carey	Anytime You Need a Friend	Nope
9	Wet Wet Wet	Love Is all Around	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001khlx/top-of-the-pops-02061994

TOTP 28 OCT 1993

Posted on November 9, 2022 by 80stastic

It’s late October 1993 and TOTP seems to be in the midst of an identity crisis. Almost exactly two years ago, the ‘year zero revamp’ took place, culling the Radio 1 DJs as presenters and seeking to reinvent the show as the home of music for the youth population. Noble intentions indeed but just look at the some of the artists on this show:

Bryan Adams
Phil Collins
Meatloaf
David Hasselhoff!

Sure, it was a chart based show and it could be argued that the choice of artists reflected those shifting the most units but in reply I would refer you to that list again and say David Hasselhoff!! What’s that? Wasn’t the Breakers section there to showcase the more left field tunes in the chart? Good point and there are indeed some of them in tonight’s jam packed Breakers feature like The Grid and The Good Men but when there’s five of them like tonight you literally get about twenty seconds worth of those artists. Plus, included in that section tonight are Tina Turner and a song by a character from a sit com! What was going on?! This needs a deeper look so let’s get started…

I’ve banged on about this opening song in many a previous post as its singer was everywhere in 1993 with three Top 40 hits already prior to this one being the biggest of the lot. I’m on about Dina Carroll and her single “Don’t Be A Stranger” and my search for the reason why her record label A&M kept its release back for so long. Anyway, it’s here now and up to No 4 and would spend nine weeks inside the Top 10 as follows:

10 – 4 – 4 – 3 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 8 – 8

Such was its consistent selling that I think it may still have been in the Top 10 when the follow up single “The Perfect Year” was released in the December. Enough of its chart stats though, was it any good? It’s certainly an accomplished ballad and Dina can deliver on its drama with her vocal range. Apparently it was re-recorded from the album version but the main difference seems to be the addition of a longer intro (almost an overture in classical terms) and turning those spiky strings up a bit in the mix maybe. Why did it resonate so much with the record buying public though? Well, Christmas was approaching and a love song always goes down well at that time of year. Indeed, the chart for the festive period 1993 was littered with them – “Babe” by Take That, “Hero” by Mariah Carey, “For Whom The Bell Tolls” by the Bee Gees and “True Love” by Elton John and Kiki Dee leap out after just a cursory glance at the Top 40.

In this performance, the backing track doing the ‘Don’t Be A Stranger’ part of the chorus rather than Dina singing it herself does jar slightly but otherwise she does a good job of selling the song without the need for any stage gimmicks. I’m guessing we might be seeing this one again in future TOTP repeats.

Here comes Björk to completely undermine my theory that I posited in the intro about the show being full of mainstream, rock royalty artists. Of course she does. After her first two singles as a solo artist failed to tear up the charts peaking at Nos 36 and 29, she made a much better fist of it with third release “Play Dead” though she wasn’t quite on her own for this one. British film composer David Arnold is also officially credited on the record as it was part of the soundtrack to the crime drama movie The Young Americans starring Harvey Keitel (can’t say I’ve ever seen it).

Now I’ve been critical of Björk’s voice in the past but by any measure, this is a spellbinding piece of music, full of dramatic, swooping, swirling orchestration that ally perfectly with her…distinctive voice. It really is quite a thing. Its chart peak of No 12 was well deserved and sensibly her record company included it as an extra track on international pressings of her “Debut” album. I say sensibly but it apparently caused many official complaints from fans who had already bought the initial “Play Dead” lite version of the album.

The Breakers? Already? Yes, just two songs in we get those ‘happening’ tunes causing a stir somewhere in the chart. They usually pop up after about four or five songs but they’re here early this week for whatever reason. They start with a band who, like Björk before them, are most definitely not swimming in the mainstream. The early to mid 90s saw the Levellers at their commercial peak. Their eponymous third album released in August had peaked at No 2 whilst the follow up two years later “Zeitgeist” would top the chart. “This Garden” is as the second single released from the former and would become, quite oddly, the band’s fourth hit in six releases to peak at No 12. It’s quite the tune as well with loads packed into it including jungle rhythms, a didgeridoo, squawking bird sound effects, an (almost) rap and some lyrics that I presumed were about environmental issues but seem to be discussing the state of society and its culture as a whole on closer inspection. Interesting stuff.

Another atypical act now (the more conventional stuff is coming I promise), this time electronic house explorers The Grid who were Dave Ball of Soft Cell and record producer/DJ etc Richard Norris. They’d actually been around releasing material for years but had only discovered chart gold once before earlier in 1993 when “Crystal Clear” rose to No 27. “Texas Cowboys” was the follow up and did even better peaking at No 21. I’m sure it made sense to teenagers listening to it whilst playing Sonic the Hedgehog on their Megadrive but it sounds likely to induce a migraine to me.

The Grid would release their most well known track “Swamp Thing” the following year which, after it went Top 3, caused “Texas Cowboys” to be rereleased and it duly beat its initial chart peak by four places.

OK so this isn’t exactly mainstream but was it really what the kids were buying? How do you explain this. Well, in a year when Mr. Blobby would be the Christmas No1, anything was possible and so it was that a song from a space themed sitcom performed in character (a character by the way which was a humanoid evolved from a pregnant cat over three million years) was a hit in the UK charts. Now don’t get me wrong, I like Red Dwarf I just didn’t see the need for this drippy, insipid Motown pastiche to be in the charts. I mean if you want to do a spin off from a successful comedy TV series, it surely has to be funny doesn’t it or am I missing something? If it had been something like The Young Ones and Cliff Richard doing “Living Doll” for Comic Relief I could have got on board but I just didn’t see the point of “Tongue Tied” by The Cat. Even the video directed by Danny John-Jules who played The Cat wasn’t funny.

It was actually used as part of the story in the last episode of season two called “Parallel Universe” so it wasn’t an entire anomaly construct but that episode aired in 1988 so why release it five years later? Oh, reading up on it, the reason seems to be to help promote the launch of season six which makes more sense. It turns out that Danny John-Jules had some previous in the pop star lark. He’s in the video for Wham!’s “Edge Of Heaven”…

Go to 3:10

And so the tidal wave of mainstream music begins with this little trickle in the Breakers from Tina Turner. Like Dina Carroll earlier, Tina was all over the charts in 1993. “Why Must We Wait Until Tonight” was the third single from the soundtrack album to the biopic of her life called What’s Love Got To Do With It and the third consecutive hit after “I Don’t Wanna Fight” (No 7) and “Disco Inferno” (No 12) peaking at No 16. Compared to those two songs though, this one didn’t seem to have much about it – in fact it’s a bit of a dirge. Oh and if you’re thinking it’s unfair to consider Tina mainstream then know this – “Why Must We Wait Until Tonight” was co-written by Bryan Adams.

And a final, parting shot across the bows of TOTP from those making more alternative forms of music at this time from The Good Men. Now if you’re thinking haven’t we seen this one before fairly recently then you’re right, we have. Back in August, “Give It Up” got as high as No 23 before sliding out of the charts. However, such was its banger status in the clubs it never really went away and resurfaced in the Top 40 in late October before spending four weeks in the Top 10 and settling on a peak of No 5. There have been countless examples of singles that have been rereleased and become bigger hits than they were when first out but one that had already been a middle sized hit just two months earlier? That takes some doing I think. The track’s legacy wasn’t quite as impressive being sampled two years later by Simply Red for their No 1 single “Fairground”. Give it up Hucknell.

Right, that’s your lot for anything outside of the mainstream canon. From here on in its pure establishment rock beginning with Bryan Adams who gets a whole five minutes allocated to him to perform “Please Forgive Me”. This was a new track specifically recorded to promote his first Best Of album “So Far So Good” and his first single since “Do I Have To Say The Words” fifteen months previously. Presumably this compilation was to plug the gap between Bryan’s studio albums – there was five years separating “Waking Up The Neighbours” and “18 Till I Die”.

Let’s get this out there straight away – “Please Forgive Me” is not a good song. Actually, it’s dreadful. I say this as someone who isn’t anti-Bryan Adams. I even saw him live back in 1987 and he was a great performer but this? No. No thank you. And I thought that song he wrote for Tina Turner was bad. Everyone else seemed to love it though. Crashing in to the chart at No 3, it would finally settle at No 2. What this whole saga does show us is the transformative power of a huge No 1 single. After sixteen weeks at the top with “(Everything I Do) I Do It For You”, Bry was a proper chart star with his subsequent releases of new material being a big deal. The idea of him entering the UK charts with a single at No 3 in week one back in 1987 would have been laughable. He couldn’t buy a hit back then.

The album was a huge success going to No 1 and three times platinum here and sell 13 million copies worldwide. Adams would return in 1994 as part of a trio with Sting and Rod Stewart with the equally awful “All For Love” from The Three Musketeers film.

Is there anyone more mainstream than Phil Collins? An easy target for the music press who consistently dissed him as the omni-creator of the worst type of sterile, bland music, he was also accused of turning prog-rockers Genesis into lamentable peddlers of lame pop-rock. Just as a solo artist, he dominated the 80s with four albums and fifteen hit singles – come 1993, had the public’s Collins saturation point been reached? It appeared not. His album “Both Sides” went double platinum and was a No 1. Lead single “Both Sides Of The Story” went Top 10.

Phil’s in New York to perform it on TOTP via satellite and curiously he doesn’t get a spoken intro. The show seemed to have developed this convention during the ‘year zero’ era. I’m not sure what the reasoning was behind it. The artist was so big and well known that they needed no introduction? Anyway, it’s the usual Collins turn with Phil gurning and over emoting his way through the song with a backing band that did nothing to promote TOTP’s desire to be at the heart of youth programming. The keyboards player looks like ex-Dragons Den overlord Theo Paphitis for Chrissakes!

Who do you go to after Adams and Collins? For the TOTP producers there was only one answer – ‘The Hoff’ himself, the one and only David Hasselhoff! For the love of God! What were they thinking? Yes, he had quite the singing career in mainland Europe in places like Austria and Germany but he was surely considered a joke in the UK no? Everything about this is wrong, so depth plumbingly wrong. There’s the song for starters. Were “If I Could Only Say Goodbye” a facial expression it would be a grimace at best. Look at some of these lyrics:

I remember the day you came into my life
I remember how time stood still
You were my lover, my friend, my joy
You were my life
I loved you then and I always will
How time has its way with things
And all the changes it brings, baby
If I could only say goodbye
There will always be a part of me for you
If I could find the reason why
If I could only say goodbye
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: James Barry / Michael Fallon / Peter Fallon
If I Could Only Say Goodbye lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Somebody wrote those down, read them, considered them and decided “yeah, they’re fine”! WTF?! Then there’s Hasselhoff himself in his ridiculous, sleeveless denim shirt and his barely passable crooner voice. Just no. As with Phil Collins, there were people on his backing band that caught my eye. He had two (two!) keyboard players one of which seemed to be a younger version of himself and the other was a dead ringer for host Mark Franklin. As if this whole farce wasn’t bizarre enough!

This turn has a way to go though to top Hasselhoff’s most famous performance in the bizarre stakes…

So impactful was this broadcast that ‘The Hoff’ is now synonymous in some minds with being responsible for the fall of the Soviet Union! Not quite but kudos to him for being part of one of the biggest events of 20th century world history. Despite this TOTP appearance, “If I Could Only Say Goodbye” struggled to a peak of No 35. Thirteen years later, an online campaign saw his song “Jump In My Car” go to No 3. There are no words.

There’s only one way to end this. How? With a monstrously epic soft rock ballad courtesy of Meatloaf of course. “I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)” remains in top spot and still has weeks to go before its reign is toppled by Mr.Blobby (1993 really was batshit).

Right, let’s address that song title. What exactly is the ‘that’ Meatloaf won’t do? Well, here’s the man himself to explain it with a blackboard and pointer…

Got it? Good. And it’s definitely not what this guy John Thundergun says it’s about OK?

I would do anything for love but I won’t do that is about up the arse isn’t it?
— John Thundergun (@Bongoharris72) November 4, 2022

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Dina Carroll	Don’t Be A Stranger	Banged on about it, never bought it
2	Björk and David Arnold	Play Dead	It’s a no
3	Levellers	This Garden	Nah
4	The Grid	Texas Cowboys	Nope
5	The Cat	Tongue Tied	Never
6	Tina Turner	Why Must We Wait Until Tonight	I did not
7	The Good Men	Give It Up	No
8	Bryan Adams	Please Forgive Me	I don’t Bryan, I really don’t
9	Phil Collins	Both Sides Of The Story	Of course not
10	David Hasselhoff	If I Could Only Say Goodbye	Hell no!
11	Meatloaf	I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)	I’d do anything for music (but I didn’t buy that)

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001drbn/top-of-the-pops-28101993

TOTP 18 MAR 1993

Posted on July 13, 2022 by 80stastic

We’ve got into a very steady pattern with these TOTP shows in terms of the presenters. Back in October of 1991 at the very start of the ‘year zero’ revamp there were more new presenters than Tory MPs in a leadership contest. By March 1993, all those other wannabes had fallen by the wayside leaving a core of just two – Mark Franklin and Tony Dortie. If, like in the race to be Prime Minister, a vote was out to the TOTP fan community as to who was the best, which one would triumph? I think my choice for Prime Presnter would go to Franklin. A reliable, safe pair of hands, he always seemed unflappable and that nothing could disrupt his focus. A bit on the dull side? Maybe but I think I’d take that over Dortie who was always appeared to be one word away from a gaffe or misplaced street slang phrase. Also, I’m not convinced he really was across his brief on…you know…pop music which does seem like a basic pre-requisite of the job. It’s my pick on hosting duties tonight. Let’s hope he serves up a presenting master class to justify my choice and not come across as, to quote that master of the nonsensical put down Boris Johnson, a ‘Captain Crasheroonie Snoozefest’.

Franklin begins in off screen, word perfect style when introducing the show’s opening act Hue And Cry. Just like Heaven 17 recently, Pat and Greg Kane were experiencing something of a revival of their 80s heyday thanks to the release of a Greatest Hits album. Best known for their hits “Labour Of Love” and “Looking For Linda” (they liked a bit of alliteration with the letter ‘L’), their fortunes had been in decline since the turn of the decade. True, their 1991 album “Stars Crash Down” had made the Top 10 but that was a last hurrah. There would be only one more album that graced the charts at all (1992’s “Truth And Love” made No 33) and then nothing but chart wilderness. We hadn’t seen them on TOTP for four years which was how long it had been since their last hit single.

Desperate times call for desperate measures and so record company Circa stepped in with a Greatest Hits compilation album called “Labours Of Love – The Best Of Hue And Cry”. It did the trick but as former Secretary of State for Northern Ireland Brandon Lewis might have said, in a limited and specific way. Yes, the Best Of album made the charts but its No 27 peak was surely below Circa’s expectations. And yes, the release of a remixed “Labour Of Love” provided both a hit single and a TOTP appearance but a No 25 chart high paled in comparison to the Top 5 placing achieved by the remix of “Temptation” by the aforementioned Heaven 17. It all seemed a tad underwhelming.

I don’t think their revival masterplan was helped by either the remix of the single nor their appearance here. The addition of that nasty, generic dance backbeat did nothing but dim the splendour of the original version of “Labour Of Love” and then there’s the guitarist and bass player on stage with Pat and Greg. Who the Hell were those two blokes and why had they come dressed like they were auditioning for a part in the musical Rock Of Ages? This wasn’t the Hue And Cry I remembered and liked. Thankfully, I have a more recent and better memory of the band. I saw them do a live gig in Cottingham at the back end of last year and they were great. It was a small venue so Pat’s enormous voice easily filled it and Greg is a fine musician demonstrating not just his keyboards skills but his prowess on guitar as well. That TOTP appearance was a nice reminder thought that they both used to have hair.

Franklin remains off camera as he does the shortest of segues into the next act who is…be afraid…Snow! Ah, the dreaded third component of the unholy trinity of the three S’s after Shaggy and Shabba Ranks. The three dancehall men of the musical apocalypse. Snow (real name Darrin Kenneth O’Brien) was a Canadian reggae musician and rapper who had come to prominence on the back of his “Informer” single which spent seven (!) weeks at No 1 in America before slinking back to obscurity. He was basically the reggae Vanilla Ice.

For me, he wasn’t the most offensive of the three S’s (that was Shabba Ranks clearly) but he was the most ludicrous. For a start, what was he actually singing/rapping about because it sounds like he’s going on about ‘licking bum bums down’! WTF?! The lyrics are actually ‘lucky boom boom down’ which all makes everything much clearer! Here’s @TOTPFacts with a more lucid explanation of the story behind “Informer”:

The lyrics of "Informer" relate to Snow being charged with two counts of attempted murder (related to a knife fight in a pub) in 1989. The charges were later reduced to aggravated assault, and he was eventually acquitted. #TOTP
— Top Of The Pops Facts (@TOTPFacts) July 8, 2022

OK, so actually Snow was more like the Canadian Smiley Culture than the reggae Vanilla Ice…

Unlike Smiley though who had hidden his ganja before the police pulled him over, Snow was taken downtown to the cop shop where a rectal examination took place. No really. That’s what it says in his lyrics! Look:

“Well the destination reached in down-a East detention, where they whip down me pants look up me bottom”

Apologies for any lingering mental images that may have caused you. “Informer” would peak at No 2 meaning the three S’s would have the Top 3 chart places covered between them with Shaggy bagging a No 1 and Shabba Ranks going all the way to No 3. What a time to be alive!

I think we all need to calm down after that and just in time, Mark Franklin finally appears on screen to reassure us that everything will be OK, even making a quip about trying to sing “Informer” at karaoke. Look how calmly he deals with the jostling from the assembled members of the studio audience. He could teach Rishi Sunak a thing or two about not flapping when under pressure like being asked, I don’t know, say about his family’s tax arrangements.

Talking of cash, here’s Right Said Fred (and friends) to ask us to dig in our pockets for Comic Relief by buying their “Stick It Out” single. The promo video for it is largely unwatchable (though I don’t suppose I felt that way in 1993) with various celebs contributing to the ‘fun’ like Clive Anderson, Hugh Laurie and Linda Robson and Pauline Quirke from Birds Of A Feather. The latter two seem to have no problem leaving their dignity at the door as they leap into the action with some awful dance moves and shouting of ‘stick it aaart!’. Didn’t Linda Robson come out as a big Boris Johnson fan on Loose Women recently? Explains a lot.

“Stick It Out” peaked at No 4.

After The Jesus Lizard were on the show the other week, here comes another unlikely act in the shape of Therapy? It turns out that there was more connecting the two bands than my casual observation. Wikipedia tells me that Therapy?’s sound was influenced by The Jesus Lizard and that the Irish rockers went on to support the Teaxan grunge merchants in their early days. Maybe head TOTP producer Stanley Appel was majorly into his grunge on the sly.

I think the first time I became aware of Therapy? I was sat on a bus in Manchester and glanced out of the window to see a poster advertising their major label debut single “Teethgrinder”. It wasn’t a pleasant sight but it got my attention and put their name in my head. Both the single and parent album “Nurse” achieved Top 40 placings, establishing them as a chart act. The band had signed with A&M after releasing a couple of albums via indie label Wiiija so they could clearly see potential for a big career.

If that early success gave the band a place on the backbenches as it were, then 1993 saw them promoted to ministerial status with three EPs all hitting the charts. The first of those was “Shortsharpshock” with “Screamager” being the lead track. I didn’t think I knew this but the “screw that, forget about that” bridge into the chorus is definitely familiar. It’s a pretty decent tune in fact. They won’t thank me for this comparison but they come across here a bit like a grunge version of early era Busted even down to the bass player wearing long shorts.

Greater success was just around the corner with 1994 album “Troublegum” making the Top 5. The band are still going to this day and have released fifteen studio albums in total.

Mark Franklin is having a good night. Not only has there been nothing approaching a cock up but now he pulls off a difficult segue in slick style. We move from Therapy? across to the neighbouring stage where we find Big Country who launch into action with not a word of introduction. As Stuart Adamson finishes his initial vocal and the guitars kick in, Franklin’s disembodied voice comes in and times his intro to perfection before Adamson restarts singing. A masterclass.

You would be forgiven for saying though, “never mind Mark Franklin, did you just say Big Country are on the show?!”. Yes, yes I did. “Weren’t they just an 80s band though?”. No, no they weren’t though it’s true that their golden era of 1883-86 was well behind them. Like Duran Duran though, those other superstars of the previous decade who were just expected to retire once the 90s came around, Big Country weren’t for giving up. Despite witnessing a downturn in commercial fortunes that began with their final album of the 80s “Peace In Our Time” and a near collapse of the band with 1991’s “No Place Like Home”, they returned in 1993 with a much better received effort in “The Buffalo Skinners”.

The lead single from it was “Alone” and it certainly sounded like a return to form and the sound that had brought them so much success. Those chugging guitars that came to be described as ‘bagpipe rock’ allied to Adamson’s unmistakable growling vocals was a potent brew. Actually, Stuart looked great here, sleek of leather trousers with an into the 90s haircut replacing his previous gravity defying barnet, how many of us watching that night could have predicted his tragic demise just eight short years later at the age of forty-three?

“Alone” peaked at No 24 whilst the album almost mirrored that with a placing of No 25. It would prove to be their last stand commercially. Subsequent albums failed to make any impression and they folded after Adamson’s death. A twenty-five year anniversary reunion in 2007 sparked the band back to life and they are still a live pull to this day with guitarist Bruce Watson’s son now in the line up.

Somewhere in a parallel universe, Mike Pickering never met a singer called Heather Small but a big tall dude called Elton instead, got off his tits on illegal substances, laid down a track called “Crystal Clear”and called his band The Grid not M People. And it sounded like this. This is completely bonkers and yet I have no memory of it at all. The track I mean, not The Grid. I do remember them though my knowledge is limited. This is what I know about The Grid:

Dave Ball from Soft Cell was a band member
They had a No 3 hit in 1994 with “Swamp Thing”

From what I have read online, if you were out clubbing at this time then this track was an absolute banger especially The Orb remixes of it on the 12”. I wasn’t and so I don’t even remember it let alone have good memories of it. The whole thing looks bonkers and yet….it could have been so much more insane. The original plan was for the project to form around the nucleus of producer and DJ Richard Norris and…wait for it…Psychic TV’s Genesis P. Orridge! Holy shit! Talk about avant-garde!

“Crystal Clear” peaked at No 27.

The Breakers are back this week and finally Mark Franklin makes a misstep when he says in his intro to Hot Chocolate that he can’t quite remember them but he’s told they’re rather good. Oi! Franklin! Enough with your “I’m so young that I can’t be expected to know about old fogey music” attitude! Just how old was Mark at this point? I can’t find a definitive answer but seem to recall Tony Dortie saying that he was only seventeen when he got the TOTP gig. Let’s do the maths then. “It Started With A Kiss” was a No 5 hit in 1982 originally so Mark would have been six maybe? He might have a point I guess. He probably wasn’t even born when they were having hits like “You Sexy Thing” in the mid 70s. Even so, surely everyone knew Hot Chocolate didn’t they?

Well, if you didn’t then helpfully there was yet another Greatest Hits album out in 1993 for you to get acquainted with them. Yes, like Big Country before them, Errol and the boys have more compilations to their name than studio albums. I guess they were more of a singles band to be fair. “It Started With A Kiss” was the track chosen to promote it and it was a good enough choice though maybe the aforementioned “You Sexy Thing” might have been wiser. A horrible early 90s dance remix of it would surely have been a bigger hit. As it happens, that’s exactly what happened four years later when a Ben Liebrand remix of it went Top 10 off the back of The Full Monty film. “It Started With A Kiss” itself got a second rerelease in 1998 and made No 18 beating its 1993 peak by thirteen places.

Unlike Mark Franklin, I was old enough to remember “It Started With A Kiss” first time around and have a memory of hearing Steve Wright playing it and at the point where Errol sings “You don’t remember me do you?” interjecting with “Sure I do, bald fella, sings a bit”. Steve Wright – phoning it in for forty years. Thank God he’s going.

More grunge rock! That Appel fella was definitely into it! This time it comes courtesy of Alice In Chains and their single “Them Bones”. The second single from their “Dirt” album, this is supposedly one of their most well known songs but I can’t say it rings any bells with me. It’s all very stereotypical grunge to my ears but it’s my eyes which are more offended by it. Not the video but the title of the song. “Them Bones”? Surely they meant “Those Bones”? Or even “Dem Bones” as in the ‘leg bone connected to the knee bone etc’ song. Alice In Chains defo referred to the Platinum Jubilee as ‘Platty Jubes’.

“Them Bones” peaked at No 26.

“When I’m Good And Ready” could be the official line coming from Boris Johnson about when he will finally leave No 10 but it’s actually the title of Sybil’s follow up single to the Top 3 hit she had in “The Love I Lost” with West End. This time she totally on her own (except for her backing singers who include the backing singer’s backing singer Miriam Stockley) and it’s another upbeat, breezy Eurodance anthem courtesy of Stock and Waterman (but not Aitken).

I thought this wasn’t anywhere near as good as “The Love I Lost”. It was all a bit forced and clunky. It was a song for Sonia basically. It turns out that Stock and Waterman knew their market though and this was a big hit in the clubs which drove its sales enough for it to peak at No 5. The video missed a trick though. Sybil and her pals are clearly performing against a green screen backdrop but instead of using something interesting as the background image, they’ve got some basic colours (including green) and a sofa that gives it a Friends opening titles vibe.

Remember Ugly Kid Joe that did that anthem to nihilism “Everything About You”? Well, they’re back with a cover of Harry Chapin’s “Cats In The Cradle”.

Now what I knew about Harry Chapin could have been expressed in just four letters back then “W.O.L.D.”. Yes, the 1973 minor hit that DJs often couldn’t resist playing as it was all about…a DJ. Did I know “Cat’s In The Cradle” his platinum selling US No 1 single from the following year? Probably not as it was a flop over here. Reading up on Chapin though, he actually released a lot of material during his career – nine studio albums between 1972 and 1980 before he perished in a car accident in 1981. Apparently “W.O.L.D.” was the inspiration behind an American sit com I used to watch bank in the day called WKRP In Cincinnati. Remember that? No? Well, here’s the theme tune anyway…

Back to Ugly Kid Joe though and their version of “Cat’s In The Cradle” is OK I think though why they retitled it “Cats In The Cradle” without the apostrophe I don’t know. Maybe they went to the same school as Alice In Chains? I presume they were in need of a hit as anything they’d released after “Everything About You” had fallen on deaf ears and so went down the well trodden cover version route. It did the trick going Top 10 here and in the US though they never managed another hit after that.

Anything Harry Chapin can do, Monie Love can do better! You’ve got a song with a four letter acronym title? Well, I’ve got one with five! “Born 2 B.R.E.E.D.” was taken from her second album “In A Word Or 2” and the biggest hit of the four singles taken from it. The title’s acronym stood for ‘Build Relationships where Education and Enlightenment Dominate’ whilst “W.O.L.D” stood for…erm…nothing really. The lyrics tell the story of a DJ being let go by his radio station as he has got too old for their target audience hence the last three letters but I think that’s where the messaging ends. Monie’s message was a strong one though about empowerment and the prejudice facing young mothers and was co written with Levi Seaver Jr and Prince and recorded at the latter’s Paisley Park studio.

Despite the success of “Born 2 B.R.E.E.D.” (it made the Top 20), the album didn’t sell well and Monie disappeared from view. She never released another album but instead transferred to a career in US radio working for various stations including Philadelphia’s WHPI-FM, WTLC in Indianapolis and WALR in Atlanta. Sadly though not WKRP in Cincinnati nor, indeed, WOLD.

He’s done it! Shaggy is No 1 with “Oh Carolina”. Now many of us, me included, may have thought at the time that Shaggy was a prime one hit wonder candidate, riding the dancehall zeitgeist for one huge hit then gone, never to be seen or heard of again. A bit like Jeremy Hunt who can’t seem to get a high profile job again however hard he tries. We were all wrong though (about Shaggy not Hunt). Two short years later he did it again pulling off another chart topper with “Boombastic”. Roll on another five years and he was at it once more with two consecutive No 1s in “It Wasn’t Me” and “Angel”. Even today he’s still around making hit albums with Sting no less. Deliciously, he’s also collaborated with someone called Rayvon which was also the name of the DJ character in Phoenix Nights that used to shout out “Shabba!“ as popularised by fellow three S’s member Shabba Ranks. Sometimes this shit just writes itself.

Mark Franklin rounds of his superb performance with another word perfect outro and we’re out. And that’s how you address an audience Liz Truss, Rishi Sinai, etc etc…

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Hue And Cry	Labour Of Love (Remix)	Not the remix but I bought the original on 10″for my brother for his birthday. Think I’ve got that Best Of album as well.
2	Snow	Informer	Hell no!
3	Right Said Fred	Stick It Out	Not even for charity
4	Therapy?	Shortsharpshock EP	I did not
5	Big Country	Alone	Nah
6	The Grid	Crystal Clear	Nope
7	Hot Chocolate	It Started With A Kiss	No
8	Alice In Chains	Them Bones	Negative
9	Sybil	When I’m Good And Ready	Not for me
10	Ugly Kid Joe	Cats In The Cradle	Not bad but no
11	Monie Love	Born 2 B.R.E.E.D	Another no
12	Shaggy	Oh Carolina	And one final no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0018zsw/top-of-the-pops-18031993

TOTP Rewind – the 90s

My memories of 90s chart music

TOTP 15 SEP 1994

Disclaimer

TOTP 21 JUL 1994

Disclaimer

TOTP 30 JUN 1994

Disclaimer

TOTP 16 JUN 1994

Disclaimer

TOTP 02 JUN 1994

Disclaimer

TOTP 28 OCT 1993

Disclaimer

TOTP 18 MAR 1993

Disclaimer