TOTP 25 NOV 1993

I write this a couple of days after Wales were knocked out of the World Cup in Qatar by England. Twenty-nine years ago to the month, Wales also tumbled out of the World Cup at the qualifying stages when they looked set to make it to the finals for the first time since 1958. Needing to win against Romania and with the scores tied at 1-1, Wales were awarded a penalty. Up stepped the unfortunate Paul Bodin, an accomplished penalty taker, who slammed his kick against the crossbar. Almost inevitably, the game slipped away from Wales and with it their chance to become legends. Redemption for the nation would not arrive until 2022. I wonder if there’s any acts on this TOTP that messed up their shot at legendary status?

Does one big hit and a clutch of middling ones make you a dance legend? I’m not so sure but that was the fate of KKlass. 1991 had seen them in the Top 3 with “Rhythm Is A Mystery” but they had struggled to solve the puzzle of how to follow that up. Neither of their two subsequent singles hit higher than No 20 but they were back in 1993 (a whole year since their last release) to try again. Another monster hit looked on the cards when they crashed into the charts week one with “Let Me Show You” at No 13 and the attendant TOTP appearance seemed likely to push it into the Top 10. Needless to say, I couldn’t have told you how this one went without hearing it back first but I found it better than I was expecting actually though I’m not sure why. I mean, there’s a bit of a tune in there which always helps – it reminds me of “Show Me Love” by Robin S though I was no fan of that – and singer Bobbi Depasois sells it well but I can’t put my finger on its appeal. Maybe it’s the comedic value of the obligatory anonymous blokes on keyboards who do a cracking job of being long haired, tech nerds who really can’t dance – no seriously, they REALLY can’t dance.

Despite this performance, “Let Me Show You” got no higher than the No 13 peak it was already at here. One further Top 40 hit followed before the collective embarked upon a career of producing and remixing for the likes of Pet Shop Boys, Kylie Minogue and M People.

Whatever you think of him (and I know somebody who has dismissed any and every song he’s ever recorded as unlistenable), surely you can’t deny the status of legend that Elton John carries. He’s sold over 300 million records worldwide and has been in the music business for 60 years! For a third week on the trot, he’s on the show with his duet with Kiki Dee of “True Love”. Kiki is an interesting character. In my head, she was one of those artists that would be the musical interlude in light entertainment programmes like Barbara Dickson on The Two Ronnies (though I don’t know if that’s actually true) but there’s so much more to her than that. For a start, she was the first white British artist to be signed to Motown and in her early career as a session singer she sang backing vocals for the likes of Dusty Springfield*. Her early recordings on the Fontana label all failed to chart but one of them – “On A Magic Carpet Ride” – remains a firm favourite on the Northern Soul scene. After signing to Elton’s label The Rocket Record Company, she started to have hits in her own right like “Amoureuse” and “I’ve Got The Music In Me” before that duet with with The Rocket Man himself on “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart”*.

*Coincidentally, there was another link between Kiki and Dusty Springfield as the latter was Elton’s original choice of duet partner but she was too ill to do the recording at the time. She would eventually duet with a current pop act to great effect in 1987 with Pet Shop Boys on “What Have I Done To Deserve This”.

She’s supported Queen at Hyde Park in front of 150,000 people but topped even that figure by reprising “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” with Elton at Live Aid in 1985. She’s also had a career in musical theatre appearing in Willy Russell’s Blood Brothers on the West End taking on the role originally performed by Barbara Dickson (ah! Maybe that’s the reason for the connection in my head I mentioned earlier). So, Kiki Dee; maybe not a musical legend but it’s been quite a life.

Now I think legends might be too big a word for the next act but they certainly knew their way around a good tune or two. The Wonder Stuff were onto maybe the fourth period of their career by this point by my reckoning. Having started out as indie grebo darlings with tunes like “It’s Yer Money I’m After Baby” and “Wish Away” they expanded their sound on second album “Hup” with the addition of new band member and multi instrumentalist Martin Bell (not ‘the man in the white suit’) before becoming major chart stars with out and out pop singles like “Size Of A Cow”. By 1993 they were onto their fourth studio album “Construction For The Modern Idiot” and seemed to me to have developed a more mature rock sound with songs like “On The Ropes” and this one, “Full Of Life (Happy Now)”. However, the chart placings had dropped off alarmingly. Yes, “On The Ropes” had made the Top 10 but it seemed to be a fanbase purchase thing. It had gone straight in at No 10 but dropped out of the charts completely three weeks later. “Full Of Life (Happy Now)” followed a similar trajectory but on a diminished scale entering the charts at No 28 where it would peak and spend just two weeks inside the Top 40. It was a decent tune nonetheless. A Best Of album restored them to the Top 10 the following year before they took a six year sabbatical.

This next band may not amount to more than a few soft rock hits in the late 80s and early 90s over here but in America they are bona fide legends I would suggest. If I judge them by the same criteria I used for Elton John then that suggestion becomes a full on statement of fact. They’ve been in existence in one form/name or another since 1967 and have sold 35 million records worldwide. They were inducted into The Rock And Roll Hall of Fame in 2013. I speak of Heart who are back with a new single called “Will You Be There (In The Morning)”.

I think I was first aware of Heart around the mid 80s when I used to listen to the US chart rundown show on Radio 1 hosted by Paul Gambaccini. Back then, they were having those soft rock hits like “These Dreams” and “What About Love”. I had no idea of their more rockier back catalogue from the 70s. The UK market was resistant to them though and it wasn’t until “Alone” broke through in 1987 that they had a seriously big UK hit on their hands. In the wake of that success, their previously ignored US mid 80s hits were rereleased and became successful in our country as well. I recall that they were huge airplay hits, inescapable whilst I was a second year polytechnic student. As the new decade dawned and the UK went baggy-tastic, enthralled by the sounds of ‘Madchester’, Heart seemed unwanted and no longer relevant. Somehow though, they bagged themselves a rather salacious Top 10 hit in “All I Wanna Do Is Make Love To You”. Then…nothing. A live album bombed over here but improbably they managed one more UK chart hit in this year of Eurodance anthems. Well if Meatloaf could be huge all over again, why not them?

“Will You Be There (In The Morning)” would be the band’s last chart entry in both territories (UK No 19, US No 39). It’s a more toned down sound to some of those shiny, over produced 80s hits but it never really gets going for me. The band are still together surviving a rather unsavoury family incident when Ann Wilson’s husband assaulted her sister Nancy’s 16 year old twin sons after they left the door to his RV open.

Just like Elton John and Kiki Dee’s “True Love”, this next single is on the show for a third consecutive week. As such, I’ve very little left to say about “Again” by Janet Jackson. What? Is she a musical legend? Well, you can’t deny her success but can you really be regarded as legendary when you’re not even the most famous artist in your own family? “Again” peaked at No 6.

Just the three Breakers tonight starting with an act that is completely out of the leftfield in terms of being on TOTP in 1993 but who is regarded as one of the most influential artists in electronic music ever. A legend then. Probably. Aphex Twin is Richard James, a Cornwall DJ who rose to prominence by featuring on the achingly trendy Warp Records compilation “Artificial Intelligence” which was ground breaking in terms of redefining dance music identity and giving birth to the genre of Intelligent Dance Music (IDM). The “On EP” was his first Top 40 chart entry although he’d already released four previous EPs and an album prior to this and that was just under the Aphex Twin moniker. He also recorded as Polygon Window, The Dice Man and Bradley Strider to name but three.

Unsurprisingly I never got the boat going to Aphex Twin island being a pop kid at heart and all but he/they were all the rage with some of my more dance aware colleagues in Our Price who would always be trying to get the likes of them and Rochdale electronic pioneers Autechre on the shop stereo on a Saturday afternoon when we really should have been playing…erm…I dunno…Lightning Seeds?

Right. Quick question. Kate Bush – legend or not? Here’s what Graeme had to say in his comments posted against the video for “Moments Of Pleasure” on YouTube:

I class her in the same company as Shakespeare, Vincent Van Gogh and Mozart

Blimey! Talk about superlatives. Having said that, I once made the case to a friend that Brian Wilson should be considered in the same breath as Beethoven so…Anyway, this was the second single from Kate’s “The Red Shoes” album and is typically representative of her work in that its an epic, swooping, tender ballad though it never seems to quite reach full bloom to my ears if that makes any sense. It made No 26 in the charts which was pretty much par for the course with Kate’s singles around this time. Her last massive hit had been “Running Up That Hill” which made No 3 in 1985. Her last Top 10 hit came the following year when she duetted with Peter Gabriel on “Don’t Give Up”. The chart positions for the singles after that and up to “Moments Of Pleasure” were:

23 – 12 – 25 – 38 – 12 -12 – 26

Still, it’s not all about hit singles is it? Her albums sold consistently, every one making the Top 10 with two of them topping the chart. Legend? Yeah, she must have a shot at it surely?

The Doobie Brothers?! The Doobie Brothers in the UK charts in 1993?! What was going on here?! It was all down to a remix of their 1973 song “Long Train Runnin’” doing the rounds. The remix was by a duo called Sure Is Pure one of whom had previous in turning classic songs into awful dance hits. Remember Candy Flip who did that dreadful version of “Strawberry Fields Forever” by The Beatles back in 1990? Well, one of their number was Danny Spencer who formed Sure Is Pure with his brother Kelvin. That was just the start though. Do you recall the mini disco revival earlier in 1993? Those remixed Sister Sledge singles that were a big part of it were the work of Danny and Kelvin. Quite why they chose the Doobie Brothers as their next target though I have no idea. The band behind 70s hits like “Listen To The Music” and “What A Fool Believes” which were big in America but not over here hardly seemed ripe for a revival. I suppose the guitar kick on “Long Train Runnin’” was pretty funky so maybe that was what attracted the remix duo. The 1993 version went all the way to No 7 making it easily the band’s biggest UK hit ever. A Best Of album was inevitably released off the back of it. As for the legends question, like Heart before them, The Doobie Brothers were inducted into The Rock And Roll Hall of Fame in 2020 and have sold 40 million albums worldwide but legends? Not in my universe.

Belinda Carlisle has been a regular performer on TOTP since the ‘year zero’ revamp – I think she may have even been on the first show of the new regime back in October ‘91 – but I wasn’t expecting to see her on the show in November of ‘93 as I didn’t know she had a hit single to promote at that time. She did though and here it is. “Lay Down Your Arms” was the follow up to “Big Scary Animal” (which I did remember) but it only got up the charts as far as No 27. It doesn’t sound like traditional Carlisle fare but then it is a cover version. The original was recorded by a band called The Graces featuring Belinda’s ex-Go-Gos band mate Charlotte Caffey who co-wrote it. It’s not a bad little tune with some twangy guitar riffs even giving it an “Out Of Time” era REM vibe.

None of Belinda’s releases were becoming hits in the US at this time and maybe it seemed like they were drying up in this country as well. However, she regrouped for one final hurrah in 1996 bagging herself a gold selling album in “A Woman And A Man” and four hit singles from it including two Top 10s before the well of commercial success finally ran dry. She remains a live draw (she’s touring in the UK early next year) and is probably a legendary figure to many a young lad growing up in the late 80s and early 90s.

We’re up to six weeks for Meatloaf at No 1 with “I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)” so I’m nearly out of content for this one. Oh yes! The legend question. I think it has to be a ‘yes’ doesn’t it? His “Bat Out Of Hell” trilogy of albums has sold 100 million copies alone with the first of those staying in the charts continuously for nine whole years and still sells an estimated 200,000 units per year. That sounds like a legend to me.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1K-KlassLet Me Show YouNope
2Elton John / Kiki DeeTrue LoveNever happening
3The Wonder StuffFull Of Life (Happy Now)I didn’t
4HeartWill You Be There (In The Morning)No
5Janet JacksonAgainNah
6Apex Twin On EPNot my bag
7Kate Bush Moments Of PleasureNot for me
8The Doobie BrothersLong Train Runnin’Negative
9Belinda CarlisleLay Down Your ArmsI did not
10MeatloafI’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001fh28/top-of-the-pops-25111993

TOTP 23 APR 1992

The curse of Adrian Rose has struck again meaning we have missed the 16 April show. As such we arrive in the week that the race for the last ever First Division title was decided before the juggernaut of the Premier League arrived the following season. The day before this TOTP aired. Manchester United had suffered an unexpected 1-0 loss at relegation threatened West Ham. This set up a scenario whereby title rivals Leeds could become champions at the weekend if they won and United lost again. Both teams were due to play on the Sunday with Leeds playing first away at Sheffield United and Man Utd facing the daunting task of a trip to their old enemy Liverpool.

As it turned out, at the same time that Leeds were playing their game, I was also involved in a match of high stakes when I played for an Our Price team against a team of record company reps on some playing field somewhere in the Greater Manchester area. I have very little recall of the game (certainly not the result) though I do remember thinking I could be watching Sunday morning TV rather than doing this shit for absolutely nobody’s benefit. As we left the field after somebody had decided enough was enough (there was no ref to call full time), Leeds were securing a 3-2 win courtesy of a ludicrous own goal.

Later that day I watched ITV’s coverage of Man Utd 0-2 loss at Liverpool which made Leeds the champions. They had a TV crew at Leeds striker Lee Chapman’s house who had some of his team mates with him including the talismanic Eric Cantona and dour Yorkshire man David Batty. As the final whistle sounded at Anfield, a live link to Chapman’s living room enabled an immediate reaction from the Leeds players. Asked how he felt at winning the title by the interviewer, Batty replied “well, it’s a bonus”. Now that’s what I call an exclusive scoop!

TOTP start the show this week with their own exclusive scoop – the return of EMF! Hmm. The underwhelmed David Batty or a new EMF single – which was the bigger scoop? I think we’ll call that one a draw. Don’t get me wrong, I loved “Unbelievable” it’s just that everything that came after that was all a bit samey but not quite as good. Some 18 months on from their moment of magnificence, were we all still on tenterhooks awaiting new material from the band.? Whether we were or not, new material was what we got and not just one song but four in the form of the “Unexplained EP”. I say four new songs but one of them was a cover of Iggy And The Stooges’ “Search And Destroy” but let’s not be pedantic.

The song performed here is “Getting Through” and it didn’t tinker with the EMF formula too much, basically being yet another rehash of everything they had gone before. The result wasn’t terrible just a bit…meh. Lead singer James still has his terrible trademark headgear on and nothing seems to have moved forward at all.

In September they released their second album “Stigma” (which included “Getting Through”) to a lukewarm reaction when it peaked at No 19 and spent just two weeks on the chart before dropping as fast as David Batty’s excitement levels.

The “Unexplained” EP peaked at No 18.

Not this fella again! I think this is the third time for Curtis Stigers and his second hit “You’re All That Matters To Me”. This performance is a carbon copy of the one he did the other week even down to the white shirt and waistcoat combo he’s wearing and has forced the members of his backing band to as well. He’s even in in the same spot in the running order just after the Top 10 countdown. He has changed his backing singers and has got them a bit more coordinated in their dance moves although it’s pretty much your basic nerd shuffle. Enough of this. Next!

Well, this is as far removed from Curtis Stigers as it gets. Here’s Iron Maiden! You have to hand it to these lads, they had a loyal fan base and knew how to utilise them. Since 1988, the chart peaks of their seven singles released in that period were:

3-5-6-6-3-1-2

The final number in that sequence relates to this track “Be Quick Or Be Dead”, the lead single from their ninth studio album “Fear Of The Dark”. Never mind EMF sticking to a formula, this lot had been churning out variations on the same theme for years. I know that opinion is heresy to their fans but, like I say, it’s just an opinion.

The CD single came with a hidden extra track called “Bayswater Ain’t A Bad Place To Be” which is basically Bruce Dickinson ripping the piss out of the band’s manager Rod Smallwood in an accent that sounds a bit like Bill Oddie. I managed about two and a half minutes of the eight minutes and eight seconds of it. Can you do any better?

They’ve moved the Breakers to a more sensible position in the show as opposed to just before the No 1 so here they are starting with Marc Almond and “The Days Of Pearly Spencer”. I had no idea initially that this wasn’t an Almond original but it is of course a cover version of a David McWilliams tune. Who? Well, he was a Belfast singer songwriter who scored a No 1 hit with his “Harlem Lady” single in France but remained largely unknown in the UK. “The Days Of Pearly Spencer” was on the B-side of “Harlem Lady” and gained a lot of attention due to a massive advertising campaign launched by his manager Phil Solomon but it failed in the UK as Radio 1 refused to play it due to Solomon’s close ties to pirate radio station Radio Caroline. Supposedly written about a homeless man in Ballymena, County Antrim, its heavily stylised chorus came about from recording McWilliams’ vocals using a telephone line from a phone box near the studio.

Marc’s version was taken from his “Tenement Symphony” album and was quirky enough to prick the curiosity of the record buying public who made it a huge No 4 hit. Considering the majority of his solo singles were minor hits at best and often chart flops (with the obviously huge exception of “Something’s Gotten Hold Of My Heart”) this was both a big deal and very surprising. Unfortunately the single’s success didn’t translate to the album which peaked at a low lowly No 39.

If Leeds United were having a stellar season in 1991/92 finishing as First Division champions, then Kylie Minogue was having a distinctly mid table time of it. Her album “Lets Get To It” had seriously underperformed with two of the four singles from it not making the UK Top 10, the first time this had ever happened to her.

The second of those singles was “Finer Feelings” which at the time the critics were talking up as indicating a more mature direction that she would surely be following once her much predicted uncoupling from Stock, Aitken and Waterman was complete. Maybe the press was just reacting to the fact that the lyrics referred to ‘sex’ and ‘sexual healing’. Like “Word Is Out” before it, “Finer Feelings” is very much a forgotten Kylie single although it was also a line in the sand as a demarcation between her eras. Her next studio album would be on dance label Deconstruction and would usher in a whole new phase of her career.

After I’ve moaned on about the Breakers section bring a waste of time recently with it featuring singles that would amount to very little chart wise and which would not be seen on TOTP again, it seems to have been repurposed to highlight those that have been on the show as recently as the previous week and are now moving up the charts. Two of this week’s Breakers fall into that category. Kylie was the first and now comes Michael Ball who was on the show just seven days before.

After a brief but very successful time in the charts during 1989 when “Love Changes Everything” was a No 2 hit, you could have been forgiven for thinking that was it for The Ballster as a pop star. However, never underestimate the influence of the Eurovision Sing Contest. Well, at least not in the early 90s.

After the failure of Samantha Janus the previous year, the BBC took the decision of who would represent the UK out of the public’s hands and pre chose Ball. They did though allow us to choose which song he would sing out of a choice of eight. Yes, that meant that A Song For Europe show this year featured a lot of Michael Ball! “One Step Out Of Time” was the track given the honour of representing the country and what a fluffy, little lightweight thing it was. I never felt like it really suited Ball’s voice but maybe that’s because all I’d ever heard him sing before that was “Love Changes Everything”. However, it very nearly did the business on the big night coming in second to Ireland (obviously).

The sliding sections video has a feel of Duran Duran’s “Rio” to it though Michael was hardly the Simon Le Bon type. An album was released off the back of the single’s success which included “Love Changes Everything” despite it having been released as a single a whole three years prior. And if you thought Michael Ball was bad, the following year’s entry was Sonia!

The second mention in this section for the Deconstruction label comes courtesy of KKlass. These arch mixers had a massive hit in their own right at the back end of 1991 with “Rhythm Is A Mystery” so they thought they’d have a go at doing it all over again with follow up single “So Right”. I don’t remember this track so couldn’t tell you how this went at all but I’m guessing it sounds exactly the same as the first hit.

*listens to 30 seconds of the track*

Yep. I was right. Next!

Rivalling Leeds United in the annus mirabilis stakes in 1992 were Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine. They even named their No 1 album (No 1!) after the year -“1992 – The Love Album”. How did this happen? A fervently indie act with a defiantly anti-mainstream sound and subversive image as chart topping pop stars? Well, being signed to major label Chrysalis Records who picked up the band after the demise of Rough Trade probably helped but was it just that? Was there also a desire for something reactionary in an era of the conventional and the ordinary that CUSM were in the right place at the right time to take advantage of? Was it to do with their infamous Philip Schofield felling appearance at the Smash Hits Awards show a few months earlier? Or was it just a case of a talented duo with some great songs naturally rising to the top?

Whatever the reason, “Only Living Boy In New Cross” would become the band’s first and only Top 10 hit. A clear play on words of the Simon & Garfunkel song “The Only Living Boy In New York”, its performance here is reminiscent of some of those ‘party atmosphere’ shows of the mid 80s with balloons galore and a stage full of audience members. Didn’t The Smiths do something similar in terms of having a crowd up there with them? I’m pretty sure Wheatus did years later whilst performing “Teenage Dirtbag” on the show.

Inevitably with all peaks, their commercial zenith couldn’t last and it didn’t. Their descent came about just as they’d reached their high point. Headlining that year’s Glastonbury Festival was confirmation of their elevated status and yet it went sour after Fruitbat, infamous rugby tackler of Philip Schofield, insulted the legendary Michael Eavis after being annoyed that their set was cut short due to some bands who were on before them overrunning. It led to a lifetime ban from the festival.

“Only Living Boy In New Cross” peaked at No 7.

I hate it when the show has an ‘exclusive’ showing of a Michael Jackson video because there’s so much to read about them online whilst doing research for the blog. Anyway, here’s the next one for the third single from his “Dangerous” album “In The Closet”. If the internet had been around in 1992 like it is today then this song title would have been the ultimate click bait. Michael Jackson? In The Closet? Is he coming out of said closet? However the song didn’t reveal anything about Jacko’s sexual orientation but instead dealt with the story of a clandestine relationship. The lyrics were pretty suggestive though with lines like ‘Cause if it’s aching you have to rub it’ and ‘touch me there, make the move’ but then it was co-written with Teddy Riley who also penned such salacious tunes as “Rump Shaker” and “No Diggity”.

I have to say that although I knew there was a Michael Jackson song called “In The Closet”, I couldn’t remember at all how it went. Listening to it now I forgive myself as it’s entirely forgettable. Also suffering from amnesia was Jackson himself who forgot to put any tune into the track – it’s as if it was created purely just to construct a dance routine for the video. Ah yes , the ‘exclusive’ video – that’s crap as well. It’s just Jacko and Naomi Campbell cavorting about on a sepia tinted set. Compared to the mini epics that were his last two videos for “Black And White” and “Remember The Time”, it’s a huge let down.

“In The Closet” only made No 8 on the UK Top 40 and the next two singles did even worse before the trend was reversed with a perfectly timed Xmas release of saccharine ballad “Heal The World” – basically a rewrite of “We Are The World” – just missing the top spot when it peaked at No 2.

We have a new No 1 after eight weeks of Shakespear’s Sister sitting on the throne. Actually, Right Said Fred were No 1 the week before but we missed that show due to the Adrian Rose conundrum but they’re still there this week with “Deeply Dippy”. Now in an interview on the songfacts.com website, the Fairbrass brothers told the story that they nearly toured with Faith No More. Apparently both sides liked what the other did and there was a definite motivation to make it happen but management got cold feet. They were also rumoured to be offered a support slot with Michael Jackson but the band were put off by all the rules, regulations and restrictions surrounding Jackson and being in his presence. Both stories got me thinking about unlikely touring partners or support acts. Surely the most infamous one is Jimi Hendrix supporting The Monkees but there must be other outlandish examples surely?

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1EMFUnexplained EPNope
2Curtis StigersYou’re All That Matters To MeNah
3Iron MaidenBe Quick Or Be DeadCertainly not
4Marc AlmondThe Days Of Pearly SpencerLiked it, didn’t buy it
5Kylie MinogueFiner FeelingsNo but I think my wife had it on a Greatest Hits album
6Michael BallOne Step Out Of TimeDid I bollocks!
7K-KlassSo RightSo wrong – no
8Carter The Unstoppable Sex MachineOnly Living Boy In New CrossDon’t think I did
9Michael JacksonIn The ClosetIn the bin more like – no
10Right Said FredDeeply DippyNo

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001499y/top-of-the-pops-23041992

TOTP 07 NOV 1991

After last week’s Halloween themed show, the TOTP producers have passed on celebrating Bonfire night as well (it was two days before this programme aired to be fair) but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t any fireworks on offer. Not literally of course (Health & Safety and all that) but metaphorically beginning with a performance kicking off the show that must be up there as one of the weirdest in TOTP history. The Justified Ancients Of Mu Mu (aka The KLF aka The Timelords aka Bill Drummond and Jimmy Cauty) are ripping up the rule book here (year zero revamp or not). The performance is certainly inextricably linked to the nature of the track “It’s Grim Up North” it’s true. A Scotsman reading out a list of towns and cities in the North of England against a backdrop of a pulsating industrial techno beat was hardly your standard Top 40 material so you could argue that inevitably any promotional appearance to support it would end up being unconventional at the very least. I think Drummond and Cauty delivered in spades though with a pragmatic reading of the lyrics juxtaposed with that most bizarre yet intrinsically English of art forms Morris dancing. What f****d up psyche devised this?

After giving the new format down the banks almost relentlessly these past few weeks, credit where it’s due – this was challenging in both a sensory and aesthetic manner. I can’t imagine the old guard of the likes of Steve Wright introducing this. Actually, who is that doing the disembodied voice over? It turns out that it’s one Elayne Smith. Who? Well, like Mark Franklin before her with his BBC local radio background, Elayne was plucked from the relative obscurity of pirate radio where she presented the breakfast show on the station London Weekend Radio. The internet suggests that she only made one more TOTP appearance after this debut. She doesn’t seem to get a fair crack of the whip from the start. It takes three performances and 10 mins 30 seconds before we actually see Elayne on screen and she gets a name check.

Back to The Justified Ancients Of Mu Mu though and that performance. The Morris dancing – what point were they trying to make here? In my own, ill informed mind, I think of Morris dancing as a very Southern thing so my initial analysis was that it was a juxtaposition of North vs South imagery but that’s actually incorrect. The North West of England has a long history of Morris Dancing so it can’t be that. Was it a nod to the May Day celebration in legendary folk horror film The Wicker Man? That was set on a remote Hebridean island called Summerisle and Drummond and Cauty did infamously burn £1 million on the Scottish island of Jura in 1994 (or did they?) Anyway, as a jarring spectacle it’s up there with the likes of Pete Wylie and those nuns in 1986 for his performance of “Sinful”. Talking of whom, “It’s Grim Up North” was originally released as a limited edition “Club Mix” in December 1990 with Wylie on vocals and it was planned to be a prominent track on the JAM’s album “The Black Room” (a parallel follow up to The KLF’s “The White Room”) but the album was never completed.

Nevertheless, this 1991 version was put out into the market place due to The KLF’s huge success (as Elayne said in her intro, nobody had sold more singles than them in 1991). As for the towns and cities that are referenced in its lyrics, it’s very North West based (there’s no mention of Newcastle, Sunderland, Middlesbrough etc) and Cumbria is only represented by Barrow-in-Furness. The city where I live Hull creeps in but the rest of North Yorkshire is poorly represented. In fact, the cities and towns read out by Drummond reads like a list of Our Price stores in the North West area (I worked in a couple of them) mentioning as it does places like Accrington, Bolton, Burnley, Nelson and Rochdale. If Drummond wanted to have really courted controversy he should have included my mate Robin’s Cumbrian hometown…Cockermouth. When we were at Poly together, Robin was asked by a lecturer during a linguistic seminar to tell him where he was from for an example of a word he could break down into its component parts. Cockermouth came Robin’s reply prompting the lecturer to write this on his board…

Cock – er – mouth

Hilarity ensued.

Anyway, “It’s Grim Up North” finishes with a fully orchestrated arrangement of William Blake’s Jerusalem which was set to music by Sir Hubert Parry in 1916. I’m guessing this was to make use of the famous ‘dark Satanic Mills’ line and it connection to the Industrial Revolution? Somehow it works when it really shouldn’t. “It’s Grim Up North” peaked at No 10 and The KLF would tie up 1991 with the release of their collaboration with Tammy Wynette on “Justified & Ancient” which prompted many a customer to come into the Our Price I was working in to ask for that song about ‘an ice cream van’.

Now, new producer Stanley Appel’s live vocal policy has been the undoing of many a turn on the revamped show so far but here we have an example of how it can actually give the TV audience a better viewing experience – the ad lib. Second act on tonight are Crowded House for whom a live vocal was as natural as breathing and Neil Finn does a great job here but he was also able to indulge in a slight bit of off script free styling when he announces into the microphone ahead of beginning to sing latest single “Fall At Your Feet”, “It’s grim down South”. Not the funniest ad lib ever but at least it gave expression to some of the character behind the performer.

At this point, Crowded House were a one hit wonder in the UK having announced themselves in 1987 with “Don’t Dream It’s Over” (coincidentally also in the charts at this time courtesy of Paul Young’s cover version) before failing to chart with any of their subsequent (and rather excellent) single releases. Even this track from third album “Woodface” had been preceded by a flop in lead single “Chocolate Cake” (chart peak No 69) but finally the UK saw sense and bought “Fall At Your Feet” in enough quantities to send it to No 17. “Woodface” would prove to be their commercial breakthrough peaking at No 6 in the UK album chart and providing a further three Top 40 hits including Top Tenner “Weather With You”. That song would prove to be their biggest ever hit over here and helped the album to a slew of sales in 1992. I always saw that period of the band as portraying them as that year’s REM who had broken through in a big way commercially themselves in ’91 with their “Out Of Time” album.

Just to clarify co-presenter Mark Franklin’s announcement that they were an Australian band – I had to check as I wasn’t sure that was strictly true. Weren’t they from New Zealand? Both myself and Franklin were right (and wrong). The band formed in Melbourne, Australia in 1985 but Neil Finn is actually a Kiwi and was of course in New Zealand art rockers Split Enz before Crowded House. Plus at this point, Neil’s brother Tim was also in the band making it an equal Antipodean split (drummer Paul Hester and bass player Nick Seymour were Aussies).

I saw Crowded House play live at The Manchester Academy around this time and it still ranks as one of my favourite gigs ever. They’d done a PA at the HMV megastore earlier in the day when I’d got my copy of “Woodface” signed by the band and then caught them live in the evening where Nick Seymour did his infamous chocolate cake party piece. I saw them later on at the much bigger Manchester Apollo but it wasn’t as good a gig as that more intimate one in the Academy.

Like Brothers In Rhythm who were on the show a few weeks earlier, I’d kind of forgotten that the next act were actual chart stars in their own right rather than the ace face of remixers that they came to be known for in the 90s. K-Klass would go onto work with acts as major as Bobby Brown, Janet Jackson & Luther Vandross, New Order, Rihanna, Whitney Houston…the list goes on. Moreover, their remix of “Baby Come On Over” by Samantha Mumba was nominated for a Grammy Award in 2002 in the Best Remix category. And yet they started off in 1991 as another of those dance acts on the seemingly endless conveyor belt of artists who stuck rigidly to the template of anonymous blokes stood in the background fiddling around on decks of keyboards whilst a female singer belted out some sub-soul vocals front of stage. It wasn’t my bag at all but I didn’t actually mind “Rhythm Is A Mystery”. I think it was that rolling Italian House piano riff that made it tolerable.

So who were K-Klass? Well, the singer was the exotically named Bobbi Depasois and the other four blokes were …well…were literally just some blokes with regular jobs that happened to have a hit record. Russell Morgan (I went to school with a kid called Russell Morgan but it’s not him!) was a postman, Paul Roberts worked for BT, Andy Williams was a lab technician and Carl Thomas delivered fish in a fish van. Basically K-Klass were the musical equivalent of a non-league football team that have somehow got to the 3rd round of the FA Cup and drawn Man Utd generating newspaper articles about how the players are all part -time and the their ‘real’ jobs are being a plumber, electrician etc. “Rhythm Is A Mystery” peaked at No 3 after only making it to No 61 on its initial release just six months earlier.

In the ‘exclusive’ slot this week is Belinda Carlisle who, having been in the studio for the very first show in the ‘year zero’ revamp era just a month prior with her “Live Your Life Be Free” single, is back with follow up “Do You Feel Like I Feel”. This was almost an exact duplicate of its predecessor only not as good. The Our Price where I was working at the time were sent a sampler cassette for the album to plug ahead of the official release and I think (cringe!) that I may have signed that promo out for myself. It had four tracks on it including this one plus a track called “I Plead Insanity” which should have been a single but never was. “Do You Feel Like I Feel” would prove to be Belinda’s last ever US Billboard Hot 100 hit though she would keep going strong in the UK for a fair few years after that.

Oh and that first ‘year zero’ performance for “Live Your Life Be Free” which had Mark Franklin pointlessly ‘interviewing’ Belinda afterwards for about 30 seconds? Here’s Mark himself on that:

No wonder he kept the chat so short – he had to nip off camera to find the crapper pronto!

It’s that INXS video for “Shining Star” next. This was a Breaker last week and I didn’t have much to say about it then so quite what I’m expected to say about it this time I’m not sure. Well, what actually happens in the video? It’s a basic band performance set in a private club venue alongside a sub plot of some grotesque male characters being disposed of or humiliated by their female consorts. So we get a guy leaving down a chute after a lever is pulled, another fella being sent skywards on a see-saw plank and a geezer being sprayed with a bottle of bubbly as if it were a fire extinguisher. It’s all pretty daft and uninspired fare. It was directed by music video go to guy David Mallet who is responsible for some of the most iconic music promos of the 80s including David Bowie’s “Let’s Dance” and “China Girl”, “I Don’t Like Mondays” by The Boomtown Rats and “Radio Ga Ga” and “I Want To Break Free” by Queen. Not sure what happened here though as he really phoned it in. “Shining Star” peaked at No 27.

Not fair! They’ve only gone and done it to me again! Two on the trot! I could hardly muster 50 words about this lot when they were a Breaker last week and now here they are in the studio. What can I say about Control and “Dance With Me (I’m Your Ecstasy)”? I’ve pretty much got nishters. OK, I guess I have to try so yet again we have a dance act conforming to the tried and tested model of having some faceless blokes on assorted keyboards etc at the back of the stage fronted by a female singer (just like K-Klass earlier in the show) but… that poor woman doing the vocals! She looks and sounds like she just happened to be wandering past the TOTP studio on her way home on a cold November evening and was asked by the producers to literally come in off the street and perform this track. The singing is definitely ropey and why has she got a Winter coat on?! Supposedly, the original 12″ release of this had the lyrics “dance with me I’m on ecstasy” which was changed to “dance with me I’m your ecstasy” for the full release. Ah, the gnarly old head of potential media outrage is raised once more

“Dance With Me (I’m Your Ecstasy)” peaked at No 17 and was Control’s one and only Top 40 hit. That enough for you? Yeah, I think that’ll more than do.

Right, there’s a grand total of four Breakers tonight but none them would ever be played in full on the show. We start with Metallica and ‘The Unforgiven”. The follow up to their seminal single “Enter Sandman”, yet again this isn’t one that sparks any synapses of recognition in my brain but, having listened to it properly, it’s actually quite interesting. Having decided that they wanted to mess around with traditional song structures to see what happened, James Hetfield, Kirk Hammett and Lars Ulrich hit upon the idea of reversing the template of a standard verse leading into a huge, bellowing chorus and instead had strident verses and a softer sounding chorus. It doesn’t sound like it should work but it kind of does. So pleased with themselves were they that the band would record not one but two sequels in the form of “The Unforgiven II” from the album “Reload” and “The Unforgiven III” from the album “Death Magnetic” – heavy metal recycling; it might catch on. “The Unforgiven” peaked at No 15.

There’s more than one Chris Rea Christmas song?! There’s three actually but this one, “Winter Song”, doesn’t specifically make mention of the ‘c’ word in its title nor its lyrics. Even so, it was no doubt released at this time of year in the hope of being a hit at Christmas. Chris (or possibly his record label) had quite the cynical streak – his last single, released in June, had been called “Looking For The Summer”. Hmm.

“Winter Song” doesn’t sound a million miles way from the ubiquitous festive favourite “Driving Home For Christmas” especially the original 1986 version which is a bit more sombre than the sprightly re-recording that gets plated every Yuleltide. The lyrics seem to be about keeping his lover warm from the cold of Winter (he should have borrowed that woman from Control’s overcoat!) but then missed a Christmas trick with the video which seems to be based around rivalries between the various factions of Rea’s tour crew. So not Christmassy at all.

“Winter Song” made a respectable No 27 in a crammed Christmas singles market. Oh, that third Chris Rea festive song? He released something called “Joys of Christmas” in 1987 (“Driving Home For Christmas” was on the B-side). No, I’ve never heard of it before either.

Ooh – bit of a moment here. Is this the very first time that Manic Street Preachers appeared on TOTP? Although double A -side “Love’s Sweet Exile/Repeat” was already the band’s third single release of 1991, I must admit that I wasn’t really aware of these Welsh rockers until the following year when I couldn’t ignore “You Love Us” and “Motorcycle Emptiness”. I’ll rephrase that. I was aware of the name Manic Street Preachers at this time not least because of the Steve Lamacq / Richey Edwards incident in May when Edwards carved the words ‘4 REAL’ into his forearm with a razor blade when asked by the NME journalist how serious he was about the band, their music and ideals. However, I’m not really sure that I knew what they actually sounded like. Somehow I must have missed “Stay Beautiful” and this single despite the fact that they both made the Top 40 (their earlier non Columbia singles that were either self released or on indie label Heavenly hadn’t charted).

The band’s iconic debut album “Generation Terrorists” was released in early ’92 and would spawn six singles and achieve gold status for 100,000 sales. Its length (73 minutes and 18 tracks long) led to accusations of a lack of quality control and the band maybe regretted in retrospect their decision to make outlandish claims that it would sell 16 million copies and that they would split up after its release. However, its reputation remains intact nearly 30 years later and is celebrated and cherished by fans.

Oh and that video with Nicky Wire, Richey Edwards and James Dean Bradfield all supposedly naked and quite happy to be in close proximity to each other was probably deemed a bit too controversial for a before the watershed screening by the BBC hence it only belong on screen for less than 30 seconds. “Love’s Sweet Exile/Repeat” peaked at No 26.

We finish with yet another single that I managed to let pass me by despite my working five days a week in a record shop at the time. “Me. In Time” was a non album single for The Charlatans released between their debut LP “Some Friendly” (’90) and follow up “Between 10th And 11th” (’92) and was the third not to feature on an album in a row after “Over Rising” and a re-release of early single “Indian Rope”. Presumably this was a deliberate strategy on behalf of record label Situation Two to ensure their boys didn’t disappear from view and people’s minds as the Madchester phenomenon waned as 1991 came to an end.

Now I’ve listened to it properly 30 years after the event, I conclude that it’s not bad at all if a little lightweight. It seems to be a genuinely forgotten single of theirs as well with it not being on any of the band’s Best Of albums (as far as I can tell) and the only version on Spotify is from a live gig and not the studio single release. Also, what was with the errant punctuation in the song’s title? Weird(o).

And talking of weird….what the Hell was happening here?! Neil Sedaka on TOTP?! In 1991?! Look, I know he is a legendary singer, pianist, composer and record producer (I’m pretty sure my parents had one of his albums when I was growing up) but really?! He’s been squeezed in to the show courtesy of the album chart feature as he had a Greatest Hits album to promote called “Timeless – The Very Best Of Neil Sedaka”. Not sure why the world needed one as there must have been pushing about 20 Best Of / Greatest Hits / Collection Neil Sedaka albums by this point (and there have been many more since – check out his discography) but I do remember this one coming out. It was on the PolyGram TV label and therefore received its own TV ad campaign to promote it. Presumably the marketing team at Polygram TV had negotiated a spot for Neil on TOTP because how else do you explain Sedaka’s appearance here? It’s as confounding as a sudoko puzzle. Some of the acts on tonight only emphasise how incongruous he seemed – sadly Manic Street Preachers and Metallica were only on video but I would like to imagine that Sedaka met up with Bill Drummond and Jimmy Cauty in the BBC bar afterwards and spent a while shooting the breeze over a few beers. Maybe not.

However, I do know of one person who caught up with Sedaka in a bar once. It was at the Midland Hotel (I think) in Manchester city centre. Neil was staying there as he was playing a show (Sedaka ‘plays shows’ rather than ‘does gigs’ don’t you think?) and my Our Price manager Pete (the original bass player with the Stone Roses) happened to be in there having a few drinks on a night out. On spying the great man himself, Pete (emboldened by a few ales) lumbered over to Sedka and expressed his gratitude to him for writing “Solitaire” as if he hadn’t, Karen Carpenter would never have sang it and Pete would never have heard it. Apparently, Sedaka’s reaction to his approach suggested that Pete had scared the bejeezus out of him.

Anyway, back to his TOTP performance and did Elayne Smith really describe Neil as being ‘back in full effect’? Or was she referring to The Charlatans? He gives us “Miracle Song” which was actually released as a single despite being promoted here as an album track. It sank without trace. Surely he would have been better suited to a spot on Wogan or Des O’Connor than TOTP? For all I’ve derided him a bit here, I don’t mind a bit of Sedaka and he has written some great songs – just ask my old boss Pete.

After 16 weeks of the same song at No 1, we now have two different chart toppers in consecutive weeks. With U2 only lasting seven days in pole position, they give way to Vic Reeves and The Wonder Stuff with “Dizzy”. They’re not in the studio though (shame – I would love to have known what Neil Sedaka made of Vic and Bob) so it’s the promo video which is basically a carbon copy of what they did when they were in the studio last time (including Bob sliding through Vic’s legs at one point). Apparently this single was a huge favourite down at nightclubs on a student night. I can imagine. Had I been born just a couple of years later I’m sure I would have been throwing myself around the dance floor at Rascals, my club of choice in Sunderland where I was a student in the 80s. I was once stood near to Vic Reeves in a queue for the Eurostar at Paris Gare du Nord. He was with his wife Nancy Sorrell. That’s as interesting as the story gets I’m afraid.

As a follow up to ‘Dizzy’, Vic released a dance version of the hymn “Abide With Me” which is traditionally sung at the FA Cup Final before kick-off. It’s was a bizarre way to follow up a No 1 record and it duly flopped when it peaked at No 47. Maybe that was what Vic wanted all along – maybe it was some sort of satirical comment on pop music and manipulating the charts. He should have joined in with that fictional chat between Bill Drummond, Jimmy Cauty and Neil Sedaka as the former two knew a thing about how to send up the music industry.

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1The Justified Ancients Of Mu MuIt’s Grim Up NorthIt’s not actually and I didn’t
2Crowded HouseFall At Your FeetNot the single but I had the album (signed by the band!)
3K-KlassRhythm Is A MysteryI did not
4Belinda CarlisleDo You Feel Like I FeelNo but I had that promo album sampler thing with it on – for shame!
5INXSShining StarNot the single but I have it on a Best Of CD of theirs
6ControlDance With Me (I’m Your Ecstasy)No
7MetallicaThe UnforgivenNope
8Chris ReaWinter SongNo thanks
9Manic Street PreachersLove’s Sweet Exile/RepeatI’m ashamed to say I didn’t but I do own a couple of their albums and have seen them live twice
10The Charlatans Me. In TimeNegative
11Neil Sedaka Miracle SongOf course not
12Vic Reeves and The Wonder StuffDizzy I didn’t

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m00116fn/top-of-the-pops-07111991