PJ & Duncan

TOTP 28 MAR 1996

Posted on June 26, 2024 by 80stastic

On the Monday following the broadcast of this TOTP, John Squire released a statement confirming that he had left the Stone Roses. As that date was 1st April, maybe some thought it was an April Fool’s joke but in reality, the writing had been on the wall for some time. The band were in disarray after a number of damaging events – the lukewarm reception to the almost mythical sophomore album “Second Coming”, the departure of Reni and the cancellation of their Glastonbury appearance the year before and the poor reviews for the shows they did play with much of the criticism surrounding the state of Ian Brown’s voice. The Stone Roses would be dissolved by Brown and Mani just a few short months later. Squire would move in to his next project very quickly with The Seahorses claiming a Top 3 hit with their debut release “Love Is The Law” in late April.

Also moving on to something new was the Our Price store in Stockport where I was working. I’m pretty sure it was around this time that we switched over from the old (and antiquated) master bag stock control system to the Virgin ELVIS technology. I think it stood for Electronic Virgin Information System and was quite the advancement from what preceded it. This was a computerised system that would give you daily figures (as opposed to a manual count) for every item that was sold in store meaning that you had much better sales information on which to make reorder decisions about the all important chart titles. Setting it up though was quite an undertaking as everything in the shop needed a barcode attaching to it and scanning into the system. Not only that but the tills had to be changed as well and the staff trained in how to use them. It was quite the transition and required a team of ELVIS trainers to guide us through it and for the store to be shut to the public at some points while the hardware was installed. I wonder which tunes we might have played in the shop stereo to soundtrack our endeavours…

I don’t think “I Need A Lover Tonight” by Ken Doh would have been my first choice. Who the hell was this guy, where had he come from and what did he want? Well, my answers would be that he was a pound shop Haddaway, I don’t know nor care and that he wanted a hit record which he got when this Italian House track from the “Nakasaki” EP went to No 7.

Presumably the whole thing was inspired by the wrestler Kendo Nagasaki who was popular in the 70s. His real name was Peter Thornley who kept up the pretence of his Japanese samurai wrestling character by never being seen without his mask and doing interviews via a representative. A similarly mute approach by Ken Doh would have been appreciated. Ken Doh? I’d rather have Mad Donna…

The curious footnote to pop history that is Bis have themselves an actual, proper chart hit with “Kandy Pop” from “The Secret Vampire Soundtrack” EP after their debut TOTP appearance the other week as the first unsigned *band in the show’s history.

*This wasn’t quite the truth as they were on Glasgow’s Chemikal Underground label

Up to No 25 by this point, it’s a curious song that sounds like an outlier compared to its chart contemporaries back then. Sort of ahead of its time you might say in that it has a new millennium feel to it to my ears. Of course, I might be talking bollocks here; I often do. Here’s evidence of that as my earlier description of them as a musical footnote isn’t really true. Yes, they only had two minor UK Top 40 hits but that doesn’t really tell the whole Bis story. As Alphaville once sang, the band were big in Japan, have released six studio albums, fourteen EPs, seventeen singles, had their music used in The Powerpuff Girls TV series and film and, despite a few years hiatus, are still a going concern today. They haven’t quite made it to the top result if you google Bis though being behind the Bank for International Settlements.

Themes from TV shows as hits in the pop charts, whilst not a weekly occurrence, weren’t unheard of either. There’s “The Theme From M*A*S*H” / “Suicide Is Painless”, Ennis Morricone’s “Chi Mai” from The Life And Times Of David Lloyd George and “I’ll Be There For You” by The Rembrandts from Friends to name but three. However, “The X Files” by Mark Snow felt different to all of the above. Maybe because it was from a sci-fi show and therefore the sound of it was…what?…spooky…eerie…sinister….that its success seemed somehow out of left field. I couldn’t quite imagine people buying it, taking it home and then listening to it. They must have as it went to No 2 in the charts and stayed there for three weeks but it seemed an unlikely activity. Or maybe they weren’t listening to it but bought it as a keepsake or souvenir of the show they loved. In the pre-digital age, access to your favourite show wasn’t as easy to come by. Sure, you could record the episodes off the TV to a VHS tape for repeated viewing or wait until the official videos came out and buy them (and many people did) but all that required effort. Or was it being played in the clubs as a come down tune as the morning dawned and the ravers tried to get themselves together to make the journey home? I guess the truth is out there (ahem) as to the real reason people took to buying this single in such quantities but it probably isn’t anything to do with an alien plot to take over the earth.

The X–Files TV series was first aired in the UK on Sky in January 1994 (Rishi Sunak wouldn’t have known about it then) before being picked up by BBC2 in the September. By March 1996, it was an established phenomenon with the characters of Mulder and Scully imprinted on the national psyche (just ask Catatonia). I watched it occasionally rather than religiously but always enjoyed what I saw. Mark Snow’s theme tune though? I couldn’t imagine feeling the need to listen to (an albeit enhanced) four minute version of it let alone purchase it. Such was the interest in The X–Files and its theme tune though that inevitably other parties saw the opportunity to cash in on it. In a future TOTP repeat, we’ll see DJ Dado with an Italian House version of the song but I’m getting ahead of myself. For now, it was all about Mark Snow and his hit record which by making it to No 2, equalled the chart high of the last instrumental TV theme tune to be a mega smash that being “Crockett’s Theme” by Jan Hammer from Miami Vice in 1987.

When I were a lad, the utterance “ooh-arr” usually meant just one thing – The Wurzels were on TV again. Yes, the Scrumpy and Western band who gave us “The Combine Harvester” and “I Am A Cider Drinker” never seemed to be far from our screens in that long hot summer of 1976. Fast forward twenty years and that phrase (with just a little bit of a spelling tweak) would be adopted for a much higher and nobler use than that of a novelty record – the UK’s Eurovision Song Contest entry! Gina G was the singer chosen to represent us in 1996 despite the fact that she is Australian (the following year we had Katrina And The Waves whose titular Katrina is American also) and although she would finish 8th despite being a pre-tournament favourite with the bookies, her song “Ooh Aah…Just A Little Bit” would become a No 1 record. This would make it the first Eurovision song to top the UK charts since “A Little Peace” by Nicole in 1982 and the first UK entrant not to win Eurovision but become a No 1 since “Congratulations” by Cliff Richard in 1968. Phew! How did this happen then? Well, the Song For Europe people had shown a willingness to depart from the more traditional Eurovision sound with the previous year’s “Love City Groove” track and though that rap experiment failed in terms of winning the contest, it proved that you could go bold without being derided. Hence the following year, another musical direction was chosen that wasn’t a natural fit with Eurovision but which was certainly popular – Eurodance. “Ooh Aah…Just A Little Bit” nailed that sound but added something to make it stand out – an infectious, brain cell kidnapping, almighty hook of a chorus that was simple to the point of nearly being dumb but with a sexual overtone. It was sort of like a more knowing, elder sister of “Saturday Night” by Whigfield really.

Given that the single would stay in the Top 10 for ten consecutive weeks (including seven at either No1, No 2 or No 3) and given that Eurovision wasn’t until the 18th May and this TOTP was still in March, I think I’ll leave it there for now. We’ll be seeing a lot more of Gina G in the forthcoming weeks but to add some symmetry to the post, it should be noted that The Wurzels recorded their own version of “Ooh Aah Just A Little Bit” in 2002 (with the “Ooh Aah” restyled as “Ooh Arr” obviously) from their album “Never Mind The Bullocks, Here’s The Wurzels”. Marvellous!

Just like that other Britpop band Menswear at this time, Cast decided that their fourth single release would be a ballad. Whereas “Being Brave” felt ever so slightly of being contrived and that it had everything thrown at it in the production, “Walkaway” sounded more organic to me. As I said in a recent post, I think Menswear just about pulled it off with their slowie but Cast’s attempt at balladry seemed more natural and effortless. Wistful, contemplative, melancholic yet melodic, it really stood out.

Being chosen to soundtrack a BBC montage to draw a line under England’s semi-final defeat to Germany in Euro 96 didn’t harm the song’s life cycle either. Whoever was putting those vignettes together was clearly a Britpop fan after Shed Seven had been used twice before earlier in the competition. “Walkaway” was an inspired choice though. The devastation the nation felt after Gareth Southgate missed that penalty needed to be acknowledged and assuaged and Cast’s track was just right. The band themselves were away on tour in the US whilst all the fervour and excitement surrounding the tournament was going on and so missed their moment of national recognition. It might just be their most well known tune though not their highest charting hit. That honour would be bestowed on their next release, the non-album single “Flying” which indeed the band were. One thing though; shouldn’t it have been called “Walk Away” not “Walkaway”.

I should have probably mentioned that this is the last show to be hosted by Mark Goodier. He’d made his TOTP debut back in 1988 and although I’ve been quite disparaging about him in the past on this blog, I can appreciate that he was a safe pair of hands. His hair in this episode is very Louis Balfour of The Fast Show’s ‘Jazz Club’. Nice! Also coming to an end were PJ & Duncan. No, sadly they hadn’t decided to stop making music yet but rather that they would now be releasing records under their own names rather than their Byker Grove characters. On reflection, it’s a wonder that the change hadn’t happened much earlier. After all, they had been gone from the CBBC drama for three years by this point. Whatever the reason and circumstances behind the change of moniker, you could see the direction the pair were heading in the direct to camera piece at the top of the show where they inform us that they will be performing on the show tonight from an aircraft hangar at Heathrow Airport on their way to Japan. This presenting lark did seem to come naturally to them. The track they are promoting is the fourth and final single lifted from their “Top Katz” album and it’s a cover of the old Monkees hit “(I’m Not Your) Steppin’ Stone” except the duo have renamed it as purely “Stepping Stone”. Well, at least they were showing some respect for the correct spelling.

I say the old Monkees hit but the song has been covered by many artists including, as Mark Goodier states in his intro, The Sex Pistols but the list also includes Paul Revere & The Raiders and scouse baggy types The Farm. Like most I would guess though, the version I first knew was that Monkees one as it was on a Greatest Hits tape I had when I was only about 10. Back then I was more familiar with them than The Beatles for example due to the repeats of their TV shows that the BBC would air during those aforementioned long summer holidays. As for PJ & Duncan’s version, it’s predictably naff with the first few seconds sounding like a knock off of “Everybody In The Place” by The Prodigy (more of whom later).

How do you define Dubstar? Even the music press at the time struggled. Look at this list of other artists that they were compared to by various publications:

Portishead
Pet Shop Boys
St Etienne
Billie Ray Martin
Deacon Blue (?!)

Well, if those guys in the know couldn’t decide, what chance do I have? For the record, surveying that list, my first inclination was towards Portishead but on reflection maybe St Etienne is a better choice. Or maybe we should dispense with all such comparisons and judge them on their own merits? Yes, that seems like a better way of doing it. I shall proceed on that basis. “Stars” was a rerelease of their debut single which had peaked at No 40 in 1995 but was given a second chance after the success of “Not So Manic Now” and deservedly so. It’s an affecting, almost beautiful song bestowed with a touch of stardust by the celestial vocals of Sarah Blackwood. Deceptively slight and also substantial at the same time, it rightly became the band’s biggest hit when it peaked at No 15 second time around. There you go. No comparisons to anybody else in that assessment. As for the performance here, Sarah’s commitment to hardly moving is almost Chris Lowe-esque…Oh bugger.

There is a point where I really couldn’t be bothered with Wet Wet Wet anymore. When they burst into the charts in 1987 from seemingly nowhere with a clutch of great pop tunes (albeit with some bits of them pinched from the work of others), I genuinely liked them. Even when they tried to make that jump from pop star to mature artist too quickly with second album “Holding Back The River” I thought they were still OK and then their renaissance under third album “High On The Happy Side” was well deserved as it was a solid pop album. So why and when did my interest wane? It seems obvious now but it was “Love Is All Around”. I didn’t hate it like everyone else seems to be in a rush to say they did these days but after that level of success I guess I maybe thought they didn’t deserve my attention any more. Not that they would have known or cared about my onrushing indifference but still. I know “Julia Says” was the follow up single but after that I couldn’t really tell you what they released. As such, I have zero memory of “Morning” but Wikipedia tells me that it was fifth and final single taken from the “Picture This” album and it peaked at No 16.

Having listened to it back, it wouldn’t be out of place on a Radio 2 playlist today but was this really what the kids wanted back then? I wonder how many albums that “huge record deal” they’d just signed according to Mark Goodier was for? They only managed to release one more before the end of the 90s plus a second Greatest Hits in 2004 for their label Mercury. To be fair to them, drummer Tommy Cunningham left the group for a while over royalty payments and then Marti Pellow had to take time out to deal with his addiction problems. The band are just about still together though seem to be a three piece these days with only Graeme Clark and previously publicity shy guitarist Graeme Duffin remaining from the original combo with former Liberty X member Kevin Simm on lead vocals.

To the new No 1 and what a seismic record it was. Everything about “Firestarter” by The Prodigy screamed headlines whether they were about its sound, Keith Flint, that video and, of course, a show of moral outrage by some of the tabloids. Watching the promo back further the first time possibly since 1996 and it strikes me that it would be hard to explain to anyone who wasn’t around then why it was so shocking but somehow it was. Why was it? Well, it was 28 years ago and in those intervening years, we will have witnessed a lot of shit and maybe we have become desensitised to images that we would have once found shocking or disturbing. Perhaps, if our first view of the video was via this TOTP and that first view came after a very mellow song by those nice Wet Wet Wet boys…well, it would have been a bit of a shock and certainly quite a contrast. Then there’s the fact that it’s all shot in black and white (due to the band blowing most of the budget on an aborted first attempt) and set in a disused London Underground tunnel adding to the sense that we were watching something very sinister. We were still three years away from the black and white ‘footage’ style cinema of The Blair Witch Project but revisiting the “Firestarter” promo through the prism of that film somehow makes the viewing even more unsettling. Then there’s Keith Flint whose performance provoked such a reaction from viewers and the press. The tics and twitches that he constantly shows us gave the impression of someone who was, if not deranged, definitely experiencing some sort of mental breakdown. His Soo Catwoman influenced hairstyle only added to the sense of the unhinged. And then there’s the sound of “Firestarter”…oh hang on, you know what? It’s going to be No 1 for the next two TOTP repeats so I think I’ll leave it smouldering there for now…

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Ken Doh	I Need A Lover Tonight	Never
2	Bis	Kandy Pop	Negative
3	Mark Snow	The X Files	No
4	Gina G	Ooh Aah…Just A Little Bit	Nope
5	Cast	Walkaway	How did I walkaway from this one? No it seems
6	PJ & Duncan	Stepping Stone	As if
7	Dubstar	Stars	Didn’t but should have
8	Wet Wet Wet	Morning	Nah
9	The Prodigy	Firestarter	See 8 above

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m002053x/top-of-the-pops-28031996?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 30 NOV 1995

Posted on April 17, 2024 by 80stastic

After last week’s show was all about ‘new’ hits, this time out we have five (out of nine) that have already featured on a previous TOTP including the final four songs. We also have a ‘golden mic’ host again tonight in Jack Dee who must have done a good job in the eyes of executive producer Ric Blaxill as he returned just a month later to co-host the TOTP Christmas show with Björk.

For now though, he’s in his customary suit introducing Berri who was recently in the charts with a cover of the old Elkie Brooks hit “Sunshine After The Rain”. After that was a Top 5 hit having been rereleased and branded as being by just Berri (as opposed to New Atlantic/U4EA featuring Berri the first time around), a follow up was required. “Shine Like A Star” didn’t deviate much from the formula even going so far as to recycle the word ‘shine’ in the title. That decision paid dividends by producing the desired chart hit though its peak of No 20 meant it was a more of a blinking star in the night sky than a full blown super nova. An album was released though only in Japan and Berri as a chart comet was officially burnt out. The person behind the persona Rebecca Sleight continued to work in the music industry contributing backing vocals to various dance projects and recording as part of the folk duo The Raggy Anns. She’s also performed at the odd festival on the nostalgia circuit. As Holly Johnson once sang on the Frankie Goes To Hollywood hit “Welcome To The Pleasuredome”, ‘Shooting stars never stop even when they reach the top’.

Whether you liked or loathed them, you couldn’t ignore PJ & Duncan around this time not least because they seemed to release a single every couple of weeks. Jack Dee even says that the pair were on the show the last time he hosted it. This hit – “Perfect” – was their fourth of 1995 and eighth in total since April 1994. Of those, seven made the Top 20 but only one made the Top 10. This latest one seemed to divide the vocals up into PJ/Ant on rapping and Duncan/Dec doing the singing not that I was really paying that much attention as the whole sorry shower of a song washed over me. However, what I did notice was the former’s spiky hairdo which Boyzone’s Ronan Keating was also sporting the other week. Was there something going on with this hairstyle back then that I either didn’t notice at the time or had completely forgotten about?

The first of those five songs that have been on the show before now. “Miss Sarajevo” by Passengers was at its No 6 peak. I went into this in some detail the first time it was on the show so I’ll allow myself to keep it brief here (and because I’m way behind in writing up these TOTP repeats). So my only comment here is this – was that deliberate editing by the show’s production team to perfectly synchronise the moment when Bono sings “a time for East 17” with the chart rundown caption revealing East 17 at No 12 with “Thunder”?

Here come Garbage with a second Top 40 hit on the spin in “Queer”. The follow up to “Only Happy When It Rains”, its peak of No 13 was validation that the band were on to something and would pave the way for five of their next six singles to go Top 10 including their biggest ever hit “Stupid Girl”. It would also help their eponymous debut album go double platinum both here and in America.

There really was something quite inventive about this lot that I don’t think I picked up on on enough at the time. Had I done, I think I would have been a massive fan but instead I was more of a casual bystander, aware of them and their hits but not really affording them the appreciation they deserved. I asked Alexa to “Play Garbage” whilst I was decorating recently and I was very impressed with what I heard, not just the hits but the deeper cuts (that’s what we say these days isn’t it?) as well. Despite my instruction, Alexa didn’t serve me up any rubbish.

We saw them in the direct to camera message at the top of the show and I have to say I was confused about what was going on. My initial thought was that the multitude on screen were all of the artists to feature on this particular TOTP all put together just to shake the format up a bit but no, all these people were just one act – it’s (nearly) Christmas time and there is a need to be afraid as this is Childliners with “The Gift Of Christmas”. Judging by the online reaction to this single when this BBC4 repeat aired, most people seem to have either banished the memory of it so deep in their brains that they can’t recall it at all or literally never knew it existed in the first place. Either way, that’s not good news for a charity single trying to raise money for and awareness of their cause. Obviously, this particular cause was Childline, the charity launched by Esther Rantzen in 1986 which had already had two charity singles released in its name before this – “With A Little Help From My Friends” by Wet Wet Wet in 1988 and “You’ve Got A Friend” by Big Fun and Sonia in 1990.

In his intro, Jack Dee asks the watching TV audience to see how many pop stars we can spot in the performance here. So I did. Here’s who I could identify:

Boyzone (including Ronan with his aforementioned spiky hair)
East 17 (this apparently was the time for them)
Danni Minogue (who hadn’t had a substantial chart hit in nearly two and a half years by this point)
Sean Maguire (of course he was, he was so desperate to be a pop star back then)
The little guy from Ultimate Kaos
That bloke from Nightcrawlers
Is that pissing Peter Andre in there? He hadn’t even had one hit yet!
The two identical, peroxide blonde twins at the back were a duo called Gemini (geddit?) whom I only remember because their record label pushed and pushed for them to get a big hit record but they never did (if you don’t count this one)
Erm…is that someone from MN8?

Wikipedia tells me they also in there are C.J. Lewis, China Black, Let Loose, EYC, Deuce and a pre-fame (at least in the UK) Backstreet Boys. Yeah, all the greats then. The song itself is an abomination and those lyrics! Look in disbelief at this:

“Make all the children smile and grin

Some of them small, some of them look thin“

Or these:

“How quickly we forget, just what Christmas is

The wise men and the shepherds, they started up this thing“

Read that last line again. Just unbelievably bad. Then there’s a rap in the middle which starts with this line:

“Another child cries while Mama dies“

Given the gravitas of those words, Sean Maguire’s decision to start pulling out some gangsta rap moves (or whatever they are) at this point seems a little ill judged. He should have shown some of the decorum of his namesake, Manchester United’s Harry, who shook the hands of every Coventry City player immediately after the winning penalty went in during the shoot out in yesterday’s epic FA Cup semi final.

The single peaked at No 9 so hopefully made some money for its charity but you almost never hear it played at Christmas despite the existence of radio stations playing only festive songs continuously from the 1st December. Truly a lost Christmas song and thank the Lord for that.

That’s it for ‘new’ songs so we carry on with another screening of the video for “Free As A Bird” by The Beatles. Having spoken about the song last time, I guess I should concentrate on the video. I’ve watched it a few times now and though it’s packed with references to the band, their lives and songs – some obvious, some very oblique* – which must have kept Beatles obsessives busy – I’m not sure it is really that engaging in its own right. I get it’s meant to be a ‘bird’s eye view’ in keeping with the song’s title but it doesn’t really convey the sheer excitement and mania that constantly surrounded the band. Maybe it wasn’t supposed to but I think I’d liked to have seen more imagery of them in their early mop top days. Just my personal opinion of course. Those of a different opinion would argue that’s what The Anthology TV series was for which is fair enough.

* My favourite, if intentional, is that the bouncer at the door of The Cavern has a flat top haircut as in the lyric “Here come old flat-top” from “Come Together”.

Despite being at No 1 a month or so ago, Coolio (with L.V.) is back in the studio with “Gangsta’s Paradise” as it is holding at No 2 having gone back up the charts from No 3. Quite extraordinary sales for a single that had been in the charts for around six weeks by this point. I say ‘back’ on the show but you can tell by the cutaway that it’s clearly just a replay of an earlier performance.

The widely known fact about “Gangsta’s Paradise” is that it interpolates Stevie Wonder’s track “Pastime Paradise” from his celebrated 1976 album “Songs In The Key Of Life”. However, I’m guessing what isn’t widely known (I didn’t know until now anyway) is that the wonderful and sadly departed Billy Mackenzie of The Associates did a cover of “Pastime Paradise” on his 1992 solo album “Outernational”. Want to hear it? Of course you do…

A small insight now into the thought processes that went into how to stage artists on TOTP. I have no experience nor evidence as to who made the decisions about the best way to set up an act for a studio appearance (was it floor managers, artist management, the artists themselves or ultimately the show’s executive producer Ric Blaxill?) but someone looked at Enya’s last time on TOTP performing “Anywhere Is” and thought “Yeah, it was good but I think a few tweaks are required”. Compare and contrast this first performance…

…and this follow up appearance…

I think the changes can be summed up in the following table and I’m sure that you’ll agree they were well worth making (ahem)…

Same	Different
Enya sat at a piano	Enya’s top
Piano covered in flowers	Less flowers on studio floor
Enya staring down camera in an unsettling way	Six drummer boys instead of two
Two cello players in blonde wigs	Two violinists in blonde wigs instead of three

It’s a fourth and final week at No 1 for Robson & Jerome with “I Believe” which means, apart from the 1995 Christmas Special show which I won’t be reviewing, we won’t be seeing these two again for nearly a whole year of repeats when they will return with their third and final No 1 single. Hurray! Given that this single sold a million copies, I wonder if Simon Cowell (who’d pestered the two actors to do the whole pop star thing) had mistimed its release date and had he delayed it by a couple of weeks, whether it would have been the Christmas No 1? Presumably, he’d wanted the decks clear for the release of their album and not wanted the single to distract punters from buying that? The album’s release date would have been carefully chosen to maximise sales from the Christmas period and in the event, was in the shops from 19th November. That means the single managed one week at the top despite the album being out so maybe Cowell misjudged the duo’s ability to shift some serious units? Ultimately, of course, all that really mattered was, just like with the current government’s tenure, the answer to the question “when would this heinous period be over for good?”

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Berri	Shine Like A Star	Nah
2	PJ & Duncan	Perfect	No
3	Passengers	Miss Sarajevo	No but maybe should have
4	Garbage	Queer	See 3 above
5	Childliners	The Gift Of Christmas	NO!
6	The Beatles	Free As A Bird	Nope
7	Coolio / LV	Gangsta’s Paradise	I didn’t
8	Enya	Anywhere Is	Nah
9	Robson & Jerome	I Believe	Never!

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001xz4d/top-of-the-pops-30111995?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 12 OCT 1995

Posted on March 19, 2024 by 80stastic

We’re well intro the Autumn of 1995 with these TOTP repeats now but away from which artists were in the charts, who else was in the news around this time? Well, the day before this show aired, Everton striker Duncan Ferguson was making headlines of the wrong kind when he was sentenced to 3 months imprisonment for making lines on the head of Raith Rovers defender John McStay after head butting him during a game. As such, he became the first British footballer to be given a custodial sentence for an on-field offence. I wonder if there are any criminal records on this TOTP that deserved to be sent down?

Here’s one for a start! PJ & Duncan should have been locked up and the key thrown away for this rubbish. Eighteen months on from their first hit, the novelty was wearing thin. “U Krazy Katz” was the duo’s seventh Top 40 single and what a stinker it was! Everything about this song honked not least its awful title. ‘Crazy’ spelt with a ‘K’ and ‘Cats’ spelt with a ‘K’ and a ‘Z’ with the obligatory ‘U’ replacing ‘You’. Who did they think they were? Slade?! As for the track, it’s like Modern Romance doing their mambo styled hit “Don’t Stop That Crazy Rhythm” but instead of singing it they‘ve rapped their way through the damned thing. Vile stuff.

Although their music was still crap, something had changed with these two. Yes, obviously they’d gone for 40s style suits and brogues (and an ill judged cane for Dec/Duncan) for this appearance rather than the usual baseball cap, jeans and trainers look but it’s something else I’m referring to. A small but defining detail that would shape their future careers to this day…yep, they swapped sides! It’s not for the whole performance but there are definite points where they swap over so that PJ is on the left (as we look at the TV screen) and Duncan on the right. Do you think they watched this back and thought “Haway man! We look better this way round ‘n’ that!”. Think of Ant & Dec now and I’m betting your mind’s eye places the former on our left and Dec the right. It’s hard wired into our brains but up to this point, their stints on TOTP had their positions reversed. By the way, that’s another more obvious change that is on the way – the dropping of the PJ & Duncan monikers and the adopting of the Ant & Dec brand. There’s only two more PJ & Duncan hits to endure after this one before they switch.

The solo career of Suggs was the equivalent of a one man crime wave. It should have been illegal and actionable. After his disastrous cover of “I’m Only Sleeping” by The Beatles as his debut offering, the Madness frontman followed it up with this original track called “Camden Town”. A fusion of ska and pop with a side order of reggae, it was jaunty for sure but oh so insubstantial. The verses remind me of the theme tune to Only Fools And Horses but set in Camden rather than Peckham. Ah yes, that title location. Was that a deliberate and contrived attempt to drum up some credibility for Suggs off the back of the epicentre of the burgeoning Britpop movement?

Now, I like Madness and have seen them in concert but whilst Suggs’s character makes sense within the structure of the band, out on his own, his affected delivery and stilted movements just grate on me. Worse was to come with his cover of Simon & Garfunkel’s “Cecilia” released from his album “The Lone Ranger” the following April.

So what links Mariah Carey and Simply Red? Well, the former’s video for her single “Fantasy” was set in an amusement park and saw Mariah riding a rollercoaster and the latter were at No 1 at the same time with “Fairground” and the promo for that one was filmed at Blackpool Pleasure Beach with The Big One rollercoaster prominently featured. There was another link between Mariah and a fellow resident in this week’s chart. Ten places below her at No 16 were folk-rockers The Levellers with their new single…yep…”Fantasy”. Fancy that!

Next, a second consecutive studio performance for Nick Cave and Kylie Minogue with their murder ballad duet “Where The Wild Roses Grow”. I mentioned in the last post that I performed this song in a guitar class I used to attend back in 2010 as a duet with a student called Lisa and that it was recorded for posterity. The guitar teacher gave me a CD of our performance and I added it to my iTunes library. I thought I could maybe embed it into this blog but I’ve run into a few tech issues. I got a new Mac a while back and never got around to importing everything from my old one onto the new one including my iTunes library (well, we’re all on Spotify now aren’t we?). When I’ve gone back to said library on the old Mac, it says that the file for the track can’t be located. It’s all a bit of a mess. If I could find the original CD, maybe I could upload it to the new Mac? Can’t find it anyway so it looks like you’re all have to live with the disappointment of not hearing my Nick Cave impression but rest assured it was immense!

My duet with Lisa wasn’t as unexpected as Nick and Kylie’s what with us both attending the same guitar class and all but there have been other pairings throughout musical history that rivalled their unlikeliness. How about Youssou N’Dour and Neneh Cherry on “7 Seconds” or Marc Almond and Gene Pitney with “Something’s Gotten Hold Of My Heart”. Yeah, Richard and Lisa from guitar class doesn’t sound as left field as some of those names I admit. As for musical crimes, “Where The Wild Roses Grow” is an excellent song and should never be considered in those terms but if you listen to the lyrics, well that’s literally a different story altogether.

After Jimmy Nail used his Auf Wiedersehen, Pet fame to launch his music career in 1985 with a cover of Rose Royce’s “Love Don’t Live Here Anymore”, it took him seven years to come up with his next hit single, the chart topping “Ain’t No Doubt”. However, once he’d made that comeback, he was determined to stick around and in the mid 90s, he was prolific. He released three albums in three years between ‘94 and ‘96, the middle of which was “Big River”. Coming after “Crocodile Shoes” and before “Crocodile Shoes II” (a “Crocodile Shoes” sandwich?), it was a sizeable success going platinum in the UK and making the Top 10. Its lead single was the title track which made No 18 on the UK charts. A love letter to the River Tyne and its heyday at the heart of the once thriving shipbuilding industry that also acknowledges its decline, it features the guitar work of fellow Geordie Mark Knopfler. It’s a decent enough song that was a good platform for Nail’s gruff voice but quite why it needed a rerelease three months later as “Big River ‘96” is beyond me and also most of the record buying public as it stalled at No 72.

I’ve said before in this blog that you could do worse than give Jimmy’s 1997 Best Of album “The Nail File” a spin on your streaming platform of choice. Tracks like the Paddy McAloon penned “Cowboy Dreams” and “Country Boy” are just great songs and you can’t deny that Jimmy has a distinctive voice. A crime against music? Hadaway and shite!

Something serious now. The War Child International charity was founded in 1993 to ensure war child victims have access to protection, education and psychosocial support both in conflict and post-conflict areas with the UK arm established in 1994. A year later, they worked with British and Irish artists to create “The Help Album” to raise funds for the charity. Featuring the likes of Oasis, The Stone Roses, Suede, The Charlatans and Sinéad O’Connor, it took John Lennon’s “Instant Karma!” as its inspiration and was recorded, mixed and released within five days. So quick was the process that initial copies hit the shops with no track listing printed on the sleeve. Despite that drawback, the album went to No 1 in the compilation album chart. A single and an EP were taken from the album, the former was a cover of The Beatles’ “Come Together” by supergroup The Smokin’ Mojo Filters whose membership included Paul McCartney, Paul Weller, Noel Gallagher, Steve Craddock, Steve White and Carleen Anderson. It peaked at No 19. The “Help EP” was a four track release that included contributions from Portishead, Guru, PJ Harvey but was headed up by this song – “Lucky” by Radiohead.

For some reason, and I don’t recall this but Wikipedia assured me it happened, Radio 1 refused to support the EP with airplay which contributed to it only making No 51 in the charts. TOTP had no such qualms and so we got this video exclusive which gave us an early taste of a Radiohead track that would end up on their third album, 1997’s “OK Computer”. This is a great song, epic in its sound and ambition but also moving in its intensity – the sort of song that has the power to send shivers up your spine. For some reason, it’s always reminded me of the theme tune to the 1981 BBC2 adaptation of The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy by Douglas Adams.

The affecting video could sadly have been made in 2024 what with the world witnessing the Russia/Ukraine and Gaza/Israel conflicts, the only difference being that such images (and much, much worse) are now beamed directly into our heads via our mobile phones.

On a much lighter note, “The Help Album” included some great cover versions such as Suede taking on Elvis Costello’s “Shipbuilding”, Terry Hall and Salad doing “Dream A Little Dream Of Me” and this one by the Manic Street Preachers…

All three tracks on the spin to end the show we have seen before so I’m going to rifle through them beginning with “When Love And Hate Collide” by Def Leppard. Like many artists, the Sheffield rockers recently went down the orchestral versions of their back catalogue route (see also Midge Ure, Embrace and even Cutting Crew) with an album called “Drastic Symphonies”. Said album includes an orchestral version of “When Love And Hate Collide” which does make it sound monumentally epic.

An orchestra can’t do anything about the song’s lyrics though which are straight up dreadful. Clichéd, hackneyed and in places non sensical. Look at these:

I got your number on my wall but I ain’t gonna make that call

When divided we stand baby, United we fall
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Richard Savage / Joseph Elliott
When Love & Hate Collide lyrics © Bmg Platinum Songs Us, Bludgeon Riffola Limited, Bludgeon Riffola Ltd

How can you stand divided but fall united? And who had a phone number on their wall? I know this was pre-mobile phone ubiquity but wouldn’t you have written a phone number on a telephone pad or Filofax even? Then there’s stock phrases like “Heart of Stone” and “hits you right between the eyes” and some dreadful rhyming couplets like “fighting for” and “act of war”. What do you expect though from grown men who wrote a song in “Let’s Get Rocked” from the point of view of an American teenager with references to ‘taking out the trash’ and ‘tidying your room’?

I seem to have used the word ‘epic’ a lot in this post but if there’s anyone in the history of music for whom that word was invented it must be Meatloaf. However, he’d also give Def Leppard a run for their money when it came to wonky lyrics. I mean, just look at the title of this one – “I’d Lie For You (And That’s The Truth)”. Clever play on words or just plain dumb? On top of that there’s more clichés like ‘selling your soul’, ‘holding your hand’ and ‘moving mountains’. Somehow though, Meat manages to sound the right side of ridiculous just by the sheer force of his personality and stage persona. He’s joined for this performance by an un-name checked woman but whom my research (OK Wikipedia!) tells me is Patti Russo who toured and recorded with Meatloaf between 1993 and 2013. She still tours and “I’d Lie For You (And That’s The Truth)” regularly appears in her set list (and that’s no lie).

It’s a third week (of four) for Simply Red with “Fairground” at the top of the charts and we are still yet to see that aforementioned Blackpool Pleasure Beach video. To date, the single remains the band’s only No 1. In fact, despite all their hits over the years (31 Top 40 entries by my reckoning), very few have come close to getting to the peak. “Holding Back The Years” and “If You Don’t Know Me By Now” were both just one position away from hitting top spot but as for the rest – well, only one other made the Top 5. I guess they’re more of an albums band. A quick check of their discography shows that indeed they are with them racking up four No 1 studio albums plus a Greatest Hits collection that also topped the charts. Now that’s a criminal record!

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	PJ & Duncan	U Krazy Katz	No chance
2	Suggs	Camden Town	I did not
3	Mariah Carey	Fantasy	Never happened
4	Nick Cave / Kylie Minogue	Where The Wild Roses Grow	Sang it, never bought it
5	Jimmy Nail	Big River	Nope
6	Radiohead	Lucky	No but I had their OK Computer album
7	Def Leppard	When Love And Hate Collide	Nah
8	Meatloaf	I’d Lie For You (And That’s The Truth)	No
9	Simply Red	Fairground	As if

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001wsmk/top-of-the-pops-12101995?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 27 JUL 1995

Posted on December 22, 2023 by 80stastic

Right, that’s Christmas and New Year celebrations well and truly over with for another year and a return to normality beckons. However, that isn’t on the cards for these BBC4 TOTP repeats. As far as I can tell, we won’t be returning to these 1995 shows until late January at the earliest as the 60th anniversary commemorations of the show via a series of retro programmes focusing on performances from the 60s, 70s and 80s continue. So, after being behind with my reviews for weeks, I now have ample opportunity to catch up. Hurray!

Tonight’s episode is hosted by Craig McLachlan, probably still best known at this time as Henry from Neighbours though he had carved out a brief career for himself as a pop star at the turn of the decade with his No 2 UK hit “Mona”. Quite why he was perceived to be a big enough name to host TOTP in July 1995 though is a question that’s not immediately obvious to answer to me. He’d left Ramsey Street long ago and his last chart hit in this country – a version of “You’re The One That I Want” with Debbie Gibson as part of the cast of Grease – had been two years prior. However, he had just finished starring in the BBC crime drama series Bugs so that could be the reason behind his appearance here. I never watched that show so maybe that’s why I didn’t quite understand the height of his profile. Whatever the reason for his ‘golden mic’ slot, he turns in a pretty lacklustre performance. Giving a pretence of what you perceive to be cool and actually being cool are two very different things though why he thought he could pull off an all-in-one leather singlet outfit with shades accessories, only he will know. Maybe he was trying on a future look for size as there’s something a bit Frank-N-Furter about it, a role that McLachlan would play more than once in productions of The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Looking remarkably ordinary in comparison (thank goodness) are opening act The Boo Radleys who have clocked up a third consecutive Top 40 hit. After the ubiquitous airplay hit that was “Wake Up Boo!” at the start of the year, the band had followed it up with what I believed was an infinitely better tune in “Find The Answer Within” but once again I was in the lower percentile of the record buying public when it peaked at No 37. Undeterred, a third single from the “Wake Up!” album was released and “It’s Lulu” would fall between two stools, peaking a whole 12 places higher than its immediate predecessor but nowhere near the Top 10 position of the (almost) title track.

As much as I liked it, I believed there were better tracks on the album (which I’d bought) and had hoped “Twinside” or the beautiful ballad “Wilder” would have been chosen as the third and final single from it. Sadly it was not to be and the perfectly decent but rather obvious “It’s Lulu” was given the shout (ahem). I’m guessing it wasn’t actually about the diminutive Scottish singer as the lyrics seem to tell the story of a teenage girl who feels the angst of her age group admitting that she can’t buy any clothes that fit, gets her facts from Smash Hits and is only understood by the posters on her walls. OK, they’re a bit clunky but they beat the pants off Lulu shouting endlessly about not very much.

Now it’s never occurred to me before but is there something in the verses to “It’s Lulu” that’s reminiscent of a certain cult classic advert from the early 80s?…

OK, this was just getting silly now; silly and confusing. “Stuck On U” was the sixth consecutive Top 40 hit for those cheeky scamps PJ & Duncan including one inside the Top 10 and four registering respectable chart peaks of either No 15 or No 12. Quite how they were mining these hits from a very narrow vein of pop/rap material…well…I can only assume that the people buying their records were actually buying into their likeable personalities as the music was formulaic at best. But was it their personalities or their characters because – and this was where the confusion came in – the lines between the real duo (as in Ant & Dec) and their Byker Grove constructs were really blurred around this time. You see despite still continuing to release records as PJ & Duncan (a trend that would carry on until 1996), they were doing a side hustle as TV presenters (having left Byker Grove well behind them) under their own names. Indeed, just three months before this TOTP aired, the first episode of their own show entitled The Ant & Dec Show (!) was broadcast on CBBC. Identity crisis at all?

To add to the confusion, “Stuck On U” was the lead track from their second album “Top Katz” (an awful, dreadful title) which Wikipedia informs me only made it to No 46 in the charts despite containing four hit singles and yet it went gold selling 100,000 copies. No 46 but it sold 100,000 copies? That can’t be right can it? This is a case of advanced orders from record shops masquerading as actual customers sales isn’t it?

Next, what would be called a collaboration these days but back in 1995 it was probably…what? A duet? Maybe not. Anyway, whatever it was, it featured…oh that was probably it wasn’t it? One of the artists featuring the other.

*checks cover of single*

Yes! Officially, it was Method Man featuring Mary J. Blige. Method Man was one of those rap artists that definitely required a temporary insert in place of the actual CD sleeve when on display in any of the Our Price stores I worked in along with Notorious B.I.G., Wu-Tang Clan, 2 Pac, NWA etc. This single “I’ll BeThere For You / You’re All I Need To Get By”, released on the legendary Def Jam label, was supposedly one of the first examples of the ‘Thug-Love’ genre which I wasn’t aware of at the time but which I understand now to be the combination of a rapper doing the verses and an R&B soul singer doing the chorus (I think). Said chorus plunders heavily the melody from Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell’s hit 1968 hit “You’re All I Need To Get By” which is the only bit which appeals to me I have to say. The track did appeal in its entirety to a lot of people though going to No 3 in the US and Top 10 in the UK. Was it from a film as that might have had an influence on its success?

*checks Wikipedia*

It doesn’t seem so but it was the biggest hit for either artist at the time. Mary J. Blige is one of those names which I know and who have been extraordinarily successful even earning the moniker of the ‘Queen of R&B’ but whom I’m not sure I could name even three of her songs. The same without doubt applies to Method Man. That clearly says more about my musical tastes than either’s profile.

We’re only three songs in and already Craig McLachlan is becoming insufferable in his role as host. In his link to the next act he says “Yo! Top of the Poppers!” Oh dear. I tried out that greeting affectation once when I was a student at Sunderland Poly. My wife (then girlfriend) was with me at the time and nearly dumped me on the spot. I’ve never used it since. McLachlan then goes on to say that people are always asking him what his favourite type of music is. There’s a couple of things about both this revelation and his answer that don’t ring true to me. Firstly, that anyone would be that interested in his musical preferences in the first place and secondly that he would reply with The Lightning Seeds. Yes, I know it was just a lame line, a construct to segue between artists but couldn’t the scriptwriters have done better here?

Anyway, this was the point where Lightning Seeds really got into gear as a chart hit making machine with “Perfect” being their third Top 40 single of 1995, all of them from their “Jollification” album which would achieve platinum sales by the end of the year. Unlike its high speed predecessors “Change” and “Marvellous”, “Perfect” was a much slower, reflective tune, some may even say melancholy. In fact, listening back to it now, it strikes me that perhaps this was actually Ian Broudie’s attempt at writing his own version of Lou Reed’s “Perfect Day”. Now I’m not suggesting that his song is on a par with the classic track from the iconic “Transformer” album – of course not – but it does have a feel of it, possibly.

As for the performance here, the TOTP producers obviously felt that, despite ex-Icicle Works drummer Chris Sharrock doing his best Keith Moon impression, Ian Broudie sat at a keyboard wasn’t the most interesting spectacle. As such, they came up with a special effect that saw his head, detached and blown up in size dangling over the stage like some pop music version of the Wizard Of Oz (before we got to see the real Oz behind the curtain).

A rerelease of “Lucky You” would see Lightning Seeds clock up four hit singles in 1995 before returning in 1996 with the enduring football anthem “Three Lions” the following year and there was nothing cowardly about that song.

Craig McLachlan does some awful Guinness referencing intro for the next act who are, of course, Irish boyband Boyzone. Unlike the Lightning Seeds who followed up two uptempo hits with a slower song, the pretenders to Take That’s crown did the reverse, releasing a pop tune that bounces along after two consecutive ballads. I made the point previously that the group’s second hit “Key To My Life” was surely a forgotten Boyzone hit. Well, if that one is forgotten then “So Good” must be consigned to oblivion. It’s basically just a chorus with some other bits thrown in as an afterthought. Now, I can’t help noticing the dancing on display here (because the music is hardly captivating is it?) and it occurred to me that though there is definite progress from this…

…most of their moves involve wiggling a leg around Riverdance style and generally just jumping on the spot. Yes, at least they do it in time and their matching outfits lend the whole thing a sense of synchronicity but it’s not that slick is it? Still, maybe it was better that they weren’t super tight. I always admired Bananarama for their amateurish dance steps (earlier in their career at least) and couldn’t stand the synchronised swimming precision of some of the boy bands that emerged later in the decade.

After two hits that they’d had a hand in writing themselves, Boyzone would return with a cover in Cat Stevens’ “Father And Son” that would give them another enormous festive hit just as their version of “Love Me For A Reason” by The Osmonds had done the previous Christmas.

Now I could have sworn that I didn’t know this song by REM but having watched the video for “Tongue”, it does ring a fair few bells and so it should as it has a very distinctive sound. The fifth and final single from the “Monster” album, Michael Stipe sings the whole song in falsetto and it seems to my ears that there’s very little instrumentation to the track save for the sustaining sound of a dominant organ. It’s quite striking so how it seems to have escaped my accessible memory banks is bemusing.

Something else that seemed to have slipped my mind (if I ever knew it in the first place) was the song’s subject matter. Michael Stipe is on record as saying that it is about cunnilingus. Off the top of my head, I can only think of “Turning Japanese” by The Vapours as a pop song that is inspired by a particular sexual act though I’m sure there will be more. I wonder if host Craig McLachlan knew the story behind the song. It would certainly have made his intro take on a complete different tone. Replace every mention of Rapid Eye Movement here with the word ‘cunnilingus’ and see what difference it makes:

“Let me talk to you about Rapid Eye Movement . Do you know what that is? Rapid Eye Movement – have you experienced it? You’re about to…R…E..M!”.

It’s time for another appearance by Seal as his single “Kiss From A Rose” is up to No 5. Somewhat surprisingly, despite his profile, Seal would only have another two UK Top 40 hits under his own name. In fact, his chart success fell away pretty spectacularly. Despite his first two albums going to No 1, his third, 1998’s “Human Being”, only made it to No 44 selling 10x less than its predecessor. He did have more of a return to form with “Seal IV” making No 4 appropriately in 2003 but he has not had another Top 10 album since. We won’t see him in the UK singles chart again for nearly 18 months when another song from a film – his cover of Steve Miller Band’s “Fly Like An Eagle” from Space Jam returned him to the Top 20.

It’s the album chart slot now which means a chance for Supergrass to plug their debut album “I Should Coco” which has risen to the top of the charts off the back of the success of their No 2 single “Alright”. To celebrate the achievement, the band are live by satellite from Vancouver performing “Caught By The Fuzz” which was their first ever single which failed to make the Top 40 on its release in the autumn of 1994.

Wikipedia tells me that a mugshot of Hugh Grant – who had been caught by the fuzz (and indeed his short and curlys) receiving oral sex from prostitute Divine Brown on Sunset Boulevard exactly a month before this TOTP aired – was intended to be the artwork for the sleeve of the US release of the single. However, Grant’s lawyers complained and the idea was dropped. Not completely it would seem though as bassist Mick Quinn is wearing a T-shirt in this performance with that infamous Grant mugshot emblazoned all over it. I wonder if Hugh’s lawyers were watching?

As for the song itself, I’m slightly surprised that it never got a rerelease off the back of the band’s subsequent success. Maybe they thought they’d plundered the album enough by this point and wanted to avoid over exposure seeing as “Alright” had been all over radio and TV. Good tune though.

Oh dear. Inevitably, Craig McLachlan has got a guitar out and is singing the next intro (and I thought Mike Read was bad back in the day). Quite who the two blokes with him are or why they are dressed as Arabs I’m not sure. Could the disguised duo be any of the artists that were in the studio that day? Well, having inspected the footage, it’s clearly not PJ & Duncan / Ant & Dec nor any of Boyzone – could it be any of the Lightning Seeds or The Boo Radleys? I’d like to think they wouldn’t have lowered themselves.

Anyway, said intro is for Julian Cope who is enjoying his first UK Top 40 hit since the rather lovely “Beautiful Love” from 1991. “Try Try Try” was the lead single from his twelfth solo studio album “20 Mothers” – wait, his twelfth was in 1995?! So how many has he done in total?

*checks his discography*

My God! He’s up to 36 now! Like him or loath him (and I very much like him), you have to admire the prolific frequency of his output. Listening back to “Try Try Try” now, I’m struck by how conventional a sound it is which is at odds with his outlandish appearance (he does look like a knacker in that druid hat). It sort of reminds me of The Who in places, something about the melody perhaps? I’d sort of lost track of Julian by this point having kind of drawn a line under him when buying his 1992 compilation “Floored Genius” though I’m sure I went to an exhibition he curated at the Whitworth Art Gallery in Manchester around this time.

There’s an episode of Rock Family Trees about the post-punk scene in Liverpool in the early 70s where Pete Wylie talks about Cope having been in the short lived but near legendary Crucial Three with him alongside Ian McCulloch. His relationship with Julian has been antagonistic over the years and he describes him as being this rather unwanted, weirdo type figure tutting “Here comes Julian” whenever Cope arrived. My wife and I still use this phrase today usually when our cat is pissing us off referring to him as Julian even though his name is Peter Pan.

The Outhere Brothers are still at No 1 with “Boom Boom Boom”. Fear not though as their four week reign at the top will be ended in the next show by *SPOILER ALERT* Take That who also ended the run of their other chart topper “Don’t Stop (Wiggle Wiggle)”. This, in some way, almost makes up for the fact that they couldn’t depose Mr. Blobby as the Christmas No 1 in 1993. Almost.

The play out video is “Violet” by Hole. Apparently the lyrics relate to Courtney Love’s past relationship with Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan and it got me thinking about how many other songs are about relationships that have gone bad. Off the top of my head there’s “A Good Heart” by Feargal Sharkey which was written by Maria McKee about the end of her relationship with Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers keyboardist Benmont Tench. Then there’s the follow up single “You Little Thief” which is written by Tench and is supposedly his response to McKee’s song. Perhaps the most famous example though is Carly Simon’s “You’re So Vain”. For years there was speculation about who the song was about but Carly has finally admitted that it was about ex-lover Warren Beatty – well, the second verse at least if not the whole song. There must be many more out there though surely?

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	The Boo Radleys	It’s Lulu	No but I had the album
2	PJ & Duncan	Stuck On U	As if
3	Method Man featuring Mary J. Blige	I’ll BeThere For You / You’re All I Need To Get By	No
4	The Lightning Seeds	Perfect	Nope
5	Boyzone	So Good	Never happening
6	REM	Tongue	Nah
7	Seal	Kiss From A Rose	I did not
8	Supergrass	Caught By The Fuzz	See 1 above
9	Julian Cope	Try Try Try	Sorry Julian but no
10	The Outhere Brothers	Boom Boom Boom	Hell no!
11	Hole	Violet	Not for me thanks

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001tdmj/top-of-the-pops-27071995

TOTP 23 FEB 1995

Posted on October 5, 2023 by 80stastic

We’re four weeks into a make over that saw TOTP adopt a new logo, set, title sequence and theme tune but we should probably remind ourselves that this was nothing compared to the changes going on at Radio 1 under controller Matthew Bannister at this time. Determined to rid the station of its Smashie and Nicey image, Bannister had overseen the exits of such names as Gary Davies, Dave Lee Travis, Simon Bates, ‘Whispering’ Bob Harris and Paul Gambaccini in the 18 months since his appointment and had also made the decision that the station would not playlist any ‘old music’ (typically anything recorded before 1990).

However, there was still a dinosaur clinging on to its very existence that had somehow avoided succumbing to Bannister’s hatchet. Hiding away in the early hours slot was 80s throwback Bruno Brookes. I used to listen to this guy back in the mid-80s when he did the drivetime show and quite liked him but then I was a callow, know-nothing youth. As I matured though, he became irritating to me – the older I got, the more annoying I perceived him to be. And yet, when he was one of the Radio 1 DJs brought back into the TOTP fold by Ric Blaxill in 1994, his presence was almost reassuring and he actually seemed like a safe pair of hands. This wasn’t the view shared by Matthew Bannister and his Head of Production Trevor Dann though. In the 2001 documentary Blood on the Carpet: Walking with Disc Jockeys, Dann recalls how he asked the question “…why is Bruno on?” if there was meant to be a cull on all the dinosaur DJs. Apparently, he did have a loyal audience of truckers tuning in to his early morning show but it wasn’t enough to save him. The day after this TOTP was broadcast, Brookes was sacked by Dann. Brutal stuff.

There were also no Radio 1 DJs on this edition of the BBC’s prime time music show as it was another ‘golden mic’ week, this time filled by D:Ream’s Peter Cunnah. I’d have to say, he’s not a natural presenter. I think his nerves got the better of him to the extent that he overly relies on the prop of his microphone and almost obscures his mouth. The first act he introduces are Perfecto Allstarz with “Reach Up (Papa’s Got A Brand New Pigbag)”. I spewed out a rant about how egregious I found this track recently when compared to the glorious 1982 original and I haven’t changed my mind in the meantime. For this performance they’ve ditched the guys in the skeleton outfits and replaced them with dancers who are dressed like they’ve just hot-footed it from Janet Jackson’s “Rhythm Nation” world tour. Were combat trousers a thing in 1995? Oh, I can’t remember. The vocalist tries to join in with some of the dance moves but can’t keep up and so styles it out with some vague arm waving and a toss of her hair. Not entirely convincing, a bit like the track itself. Not many agreed with this assessment of mine though. The single spent five weeks inside the Top 10 even going back up the charts after dropping the previous week. It eventually peaked at No 6.

Excellent! Another PJ & Duncan hit! Just what we needed! Obviously not but clearly the record buying public of the time couldn’t get enough of them. “Our Radio Rocks” was the duo’s fifth consecutive Top 40 hit and sixth single released from their album “Psyche”. After trying to exploit the Christmas market with a slushy, romantic ballad (“Eternal Love”) last time out, they’re back to the familiar rap/pop formula as typified by “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble”. An homage to the the power and appeal of radio (sort of), the ‘lyrics’ are primary school level of word play. It begins badly with a chant of “Here we go” and never really recovers. I once started an essay at school with the sentence ‘Thud, thud, thud, thud, his footsteps echoed around the empty street’. My English teacher was appalled but even he would surely agree that my composition was intellectually superior to PJ & Duncan’s effort. The rap starts with an obvious paraphrase from a classic pop hit:

“Video never killed the radio star“
Written by: DENI LEW, MICHAEL OLTON MCCOLLIN, NICKY GRAHAM
Lyrics © Wixen Music Publishing, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.

before moving onto the ‘killer’ rhyming couplet:

“DJ are the shepherd and we are your flock, you holler we follow our favourite jock“
Written by: DENI LEW, MICHAEL OLTON MCCOLLIN, NICKY GRAHAM
Lyrics © Wixen Music Publishing, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.

Oh. I may consider my schoolboy writing a cut above Peej and Deej’s lyrics but when it came to sartorial choices, I’m sad to report I was no better than them. I too once wore a gilet like Dec/Duncan in a moment of fashion madness. My friend Robin, who was staying with us at the time, thought it was marvellous and ripped the piss out of me mercilessly. I bet Ant/PJ would never have done that to his mate!

For Bon Jovi’s last single “Always”, TOTP producer Ric Blaxill had the band perform the song against the stunning backdrop of Niagara Falls. It worked so well that the show repeated the clip a couple of times. The band were at it again for the follow up single “Someday I’ll Be Saturday Night” with them playing in the New York Giants Stadium. Known alternatively as The Swamp, it was also home at the time to the New York Jets but Peter Cunnah doesn’t mention that in his intro. Maybe the Jets weren’t as big a name as the Giants? I’ve no idea. Obviously it doesn’t work as well as a backdrop as Niagara Falls in the wow factor stakes. The stadium lighting doesn’t help as they seem to dazzle too much to me and undermine the shot. Still, credit should be given for trying something different at least.

Like “Always”, the single was another new track taken from their Best Of album “Crossroads” and has proved to be a pretty durable Bon Jovi tune. It’s a crowd favourite live and its flexible structure has enabled the band to perform it in lots of different styles. The style on display in this TOTP here though was that of censorship. The line “all the good shit’s gone” is sung by Jon Bon Jovi as just “All the good is gone”. He could have at least replaced ‘shit’ with the word ‘stuff’ surely?

The problem with these in studio exclusive performances that would showcase a single that hadn’t even been released yet is that they’d crash into the charts the following week thereby requiring another TOTP appearance. Back in the day, only the No 1 record could have guaranteed appearing on consecutive shows. Come 1995, it seemed to be happening all the time. I know it wouldn’t have troubled Ric Blaxill but it’s playing havoc with my blog writing 28 years later. It’s hard to come up with new content on a subject I might have only just posted about a few days earlier. Plus these are events that happened in the past that are immovable; I’m not commenting on Rishi Sunak changing his mind on HS2!

Anyway, all of the above is leading me to Elastica and their single “Waking Up”. Fortunately, the band have provided me with an alternative angle for a write up. Conveniently, they’ve roped in Justine Frischmann’s then boyfriend Damon Albarn of Blur to appear on stage with them. Damon was in the TOTP studio anyway with his own band who followed Elastica in the running order so it probably wasn’t that hard to arrange. The interesting point here though is who’s idea was it? Was it a cross label agreement to help promote both bands? How about a devilish plan by Blaxill to spice up the show? Or perhaps just an impromptu decision between a boyfriend and girlfriend because it would be a laugh? Certainly Albarn seems to be playing his role for comedic effect with his goofy stare from behind his heavy rimmed glasses. There’s no denying that the celebrity couple generated publicity for Elastica but wouldn’t Justine have not wanted to ride on the coat tails of her boyfriend? Perhaps the biggest question of all was what was the deal with the motionless male model looking guys wearing just a towel that were positioned around the stage? They looked like they needed waking up. Ahem.

The inevitable segue into Blur happens immediately. Now bearing in mind that the band’s last single release was “End Of A Century” the previous November and that they wouldn’t release their next for another six months when they squared up to Oasis in The Battle of Britpop, it seems likely to me that this appearance to perform a track from their “Parklife” album (“Jubilee”) was a record label engineered exercise. Billed as an ‘album performance’ by the TOTP caption, it was supposedly to celebrate the band winning four awards at the recent BRIT awards. Well, maybe. It’s true that the show introduced an album chart section during the ‘year zero’ revamp but this wasn’t highlighting a new entry into said chart or the No 1 album. Having checked the officialcharts.com archive, “Parklife” was at No 12 and going down and guess what? After this TOTP appearance, it went up the charts the following week to No 2! Hmm. Is it just me or does all that sound ever so slightly cynical? Or maybe Ric Blaxill could see which way this was all going and decided to be an early adopter of the Britpop movement and embrace and celebrate it?

As for the track, it’s a banger but not the best on the album which is probably “This Is A Low” in my opinion. I’m guessing that the downbeat, melancholy of the song wasn’t seen as suitable for the high octane nature of TOTP not to mention that it was almost double the length of “Jubilee” which might have played havoc with the show’s timings.

Special mention should go to drummer Dave Rowntree for his piss take of Prince’s ‘slave’ stunt where the purple one had the word written on the side of his face to protest at his struggles with record company Warner Bros. Well played Mr Rowntree!

Back in the 80s, I could probably have listed all of Madonna’s singles, possibly in release order but by the mid 90s I’d completely lost my way with her. This despite having worked in record shops since October 1990. Her 90s output just didn’t appeal to me that much. Between 1984 and 1989, Madge was the queen of the pop single, churning out doozy after doozy but for me, something changed after we entered the new decade. It was as if she decided that she was done with all that pop stuff and wanted to develop a more mature sound and be seen as an artist rather than a pop star. Now of course, that was totally within her remit to do so. The Beatles sound changed dramatically from the lovable moptops to the material released from say “Revolver” onwards. George Michael totally reinvented himself after leaving his Wham! pop origins behind. Why shouldn’t Madonna be allowed to take her creativity in a different direction? Absolutely. I’m just saying I didn’t like her 90s hits as much as her 80s ones. That’s not to say she didn’t release anything good during the decade. “Vogue”, “Ray Of Light”, “Justify My Love” are standouts from those years but some of her stuff just didn’t cut through with me.

“Bedtime Story” is a case in point. The title track from her album and co-written by Björk (not a selling point for me), it just seems what we would have called ‘pseudy’ back in the day. A tale of the delights of the unconscious world, it’s far too arty for my pop sensibilities with its ethereal trance beats and pulsing bass. Oh and then there’s the lyrics. Whereas PJ & Duncan’s were lowest common denominator crap, “Bedtime Stories” are painfully highbrow. Check these lines which are spotlighted in the video:

“Words are useless, especially sentences. They don’t stand for anything“
Writer/s: Björk Gudmundsdottir, Marius De vries, Nellee Hooper
Publisher: Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.

Hmm. One in the eye there for linguists everywhere. Talking of the video, my God! Pretentious? Moi? It was the most expensive video ever made at the time (though it was outdone by Janet and Michael Jackson’s “Scream” just one year later). Channelling the imagery of surrealist painters like Frida Kahlo and Remedios Varo, it includes scenes such as Madonna giving birth to doves, in a pool with skulls and finally the unnerving sight of her with her mouth where her eyes should be and vice versa. That final image brought to mind the dark fantasy horror of Guillermo del Toro’s Pan’s Labyrinth taking the video into the realms of high art. Maybe that’s what Madonna wanted all along. “Bedtime Story” peaked at No 4 thereby banishing for the moment the memories of Madonna’s last single (“Take A Bow”) being the first to not make the UK Top 10 since “Lucky Star” in 1984.

Right, I’m just going to put this out there now. I like Del Amitri. Always have. Not in a superfan type of way but I like what they do in the same way that I like Deacon Blue. Both bands, it seems to me, have something in common and it’s not that they’re both Scottish. No, it’s that they both suffer from being perceived as unfashionable, not edgy enough and, in some people’s minds, even dull. This seems grossly unfair to me. Both have forged longstanding careers (albeit with not insubstantial sabbaticals at times), both have written some pretty darn good songs and both have musicality to spare. So what’s the issue here then? Their images? Sure, they’re not that much to look at (except Deacon Blue’s Lorraine McIntosh who I’ve always had a thing for plus I have female friends who regard Ricky Ross similarly) but surely Del Amitri lead singer Justin Currie’s lambchop sideburns weren’t a deal breaker were they? So what is it that people object to so much? Their lyrics? What’s wrong with writing from the heart about things that you know about? Whatever the reason for the looks of scorn when you admit to liking them, I’ll not be apologising for liking good songs.

Take “Here And Now” for example. The lead single from their fourth album “Twisted”, it’s a great tune. Melodic, excellent laid back Summery feel, lyrics that stick in your head, nice guitar fade out. There’s even some falsetto vocals in there just to mix things up a bit. It’s a nice song. Ah, I’ve answered my own question haven’t I? Nice. That dreaded word that no musician wants to be described as. Oh, I don’t care. I still like it and it’s fairly simple chords mean I can just about strum it on the guitar which is always a bonus.

“Here And Now”only got to No 21 but then Del Amitri have never been about huge selling singles have they? Fifteen Top 40 hits but not one of them got higher than No 11 with most peaking somewhere in the 20s. Albums are a different story though. Of their seven studio albums, only two peaked lower than No 6. The band are back together again now with their last album being as recent as 2021 and they have a tour booked for 2024 as support for Simple Minds. Oh and you can stop that sniggering at the back about the credibility of Simple Minds while you’re at it!

I quite often use this phrase but who the hell were this lot?! Seriously, anybody remember The Glam Metal Detectives? Well, too be fair to us all, they weren’t a proper band but a fictional group in a BBC TV series of the same name. I can honestly say that I never watched any of its episodes but then there were only seven ever made as it only lasted for one series. Wikipedia tells me it was some sort of comedy which combined sketch and sitcom elements. Ah, the BBC trying to be all innovative and subversive eh? No wonder it was shown on BBC2 then. It did have some decent names in the cast including Phil Cornwell and Doon Mackichan both of whom appear in this performance. Their song – “Everybody Up” – was the show’s theme tune and was dreadful despite being written and produced by Lol Creme and Trevor Horn yet somehow managed to spend a whole week inside the Top 40 at No 29.

I think what we have here is a case of TOTP being used not as a reflection of the country’s musical tastes but as a promotional tool for a new show (the first episode was broadcast just an hour after this TOTP aired). There was certainly some manipulation going on this week what with this and the Blur appearance.

Celine Dion is at the top of the pile again this week with “Think Twice”. Despite it being No 1 in half a dozen countries around the world, in the US it only managed to get to No 95. Obviously, with the power of blockbuster film Titanic behind it, they were powerless like the rest of the world to resist “My Heart Will Go On” three years later.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Perfecto Allstarz	Reach Up (Papa’s Got A Brand New Pigbag)	Nope
2	PJ & Duncan	Our Radio Rocks	As if
3	Bon Jovi	Someday I’ll Be Saturday Night	Negative
4	Elastica	Waking Up	No
5	Blur	Jubilee	Wasn’t released as a single but I had the Parklife album . Didn’t we all?
6	Madonna	Bedtime Story	Nope
7	Del Amitri	Here And Now	No but I have it on a Best Of CD
8	The Glam Metal Detectives	Everybody Up	Buy it? I can’t even remember it!
9	Celine Dion	Think Twice	Definite no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001qwqy/top-of-the-pops-23021995

TOTP 05 JAN 1995

Posted on July 17, 2023 by 80stastic

It’s time to welcome in the New Year…of 1995. As I recall I was in a curry house in Rusholme, Manchester with my wife and a friend as the midnight struck on New Year’s Eve. The head waiter announced to everyone in the restaurant the following:

“Ladies and gentlemen; we have just slipped into 1995”

…with a very salacious emphasis on the word ‘slipped’. It was all very unsavoury. Anyway, 1995 it was and what a year it would turn out to be. Britpop exploded, the unfashionable Blackburn Rovers win the Premier League (try telling your kids that) and pubs are allowed to stay open throughout Sunday afternoons for the first time.

Meanwhile, over at TOTP, the first new show of the year is hosted by comedian Jack Dee for the second time and who does he introduce as the first artist as we enter the mid point of the 90s? A synth band from the early 80s. Yep, for all its Britpop associations, 1995 opens with The Human League. If you ignore the single “Heart Like A Wheel” which made a lowly No 29 in 1990 (and I am), this was the band’s first major hit since “Human” made the Top 10 in 1986. That song had been a US chart topper with American audiences unable to resist the band’s attempt at a soul ballad, aided by Janet Jackson producers Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis. However, their 1995 offering “Tell Me When” was nothing like “Human” and was instead a return to their early 80s synth sound on which they’d made their name. The lead single from seventh studio album “Octopus” (terrible title), it really did sound like an anachronism – a pleasant anachronism but an anachronism all the same. Quite why it cut through with the record buying public of early 1995 I’m not quite sure although it did top the airplay charts so obviously that will have boosted its chances.

Phil Oakey’s distinctive vocals sound ever so slightly wobbly in this TOTP performance, not helped by the amount of words in the lyrics of the verses; there seem to be too many causing him to almost stumble. Still, the chorus is an absolute winner recalling the glories of “(Keep Feeling) Fascination” and “Don’t You Want Me”. The band were being promoted as a trio of Phil, Susan Sulley and Joanne Catherall by this point and I have to say I don’t recognise the other three guys up their on stage with them. I think most of the classic line up had departed by then. The sight of all six just standing in a straight line like a New Romantic chorus line is a bit jarring but they just about get away with it with Susan’s Sally Bowles from Cabaret vibe the standout. And Phil still had hair!

The album was their first for new label eastwest since being released by Virgin Records and performed solidly going to No 6 and producing another hit single in the Susan Sulley sung “One Man In My Heart”. Heartened by their success, the band went back out on tour whilst Virgin decided to cash in on their former charges by rereleasing their 1988 Greatest Hits album but with “Tell Me When” tacked onto it. A challenge this year from Pulp to the title of the biggest band from Sheffield not withstanding, The Human League were back.

Despite a new song to start a new year (albeit from an old artist), the charts around this time were usually stagnated after the Christmas rush and the next song is the first of four that we’ve already seen not that long ago on the show. In fact this one, “Eternal Love” by PJ & Duncan, had already peaked at No 12 and started descending the charts but the slow sales after the Christmas rush had created a rather false scenario which saw the record go back up the Top 40 from No 16 to No 14.

I’ve recently been binge watching the Channel 4 sit com Derry Girls (I know, where have I been?!) and there’s an episode where the gang go to see a Take That concert in Belfast. Inevitably, various events delay them on their journey including an escaped polar bear and a bomb scare. When they realise that they are running late, one of the characters points out that they’ve already missed the support act who are PJ & Duncan. Expressions of crushing disappointment ensue amongst the group. This got me thinking – was that based on fact or a work of fiction courtesy of the script writers? So I checked. As Derry Girls is set in the 90s and the episode concerned occurs at a time when Robbie Williams was still in the band, I checked for concerts between 1992 and 1995 and as far as I can tell, PJ & Duncan did not support Take That. The support acts that I found listed were Eternal, Ultimate Kaos and an act called Overlord X.

Just in case my Take That concert research hasn’t made me look sad enough, I think that I should say, in the spirit of full disclosure, that I have actively attended a Take That concert myself! It was in 2009 and I went because my younger sister (a big fan) had been let down by a friend who was meant to be going with her so I stepped into the breach. And you know what, they were great fun making the crowd forget all about the terrible weather (it was at Old Trafford cricket ground in Manchester). Oh and the support that day? It was meant to be a young Lady Ga Ga and some bloke called Gary Go but Ga Ga went doolally and didn’t turn up so we got an extended set from Mr Go. It could have been worse I suppose – it could have been PJ & Duncan.

A future No 1 incoming. For now though, “Think Twice” by Celine Dion is up to No 4 on its 9th week inside the Top 40. It would get held up at No 2 for a further three weeks before finally getting to the chart summit. Its thirteen consecutive weeks rise to the top was a chart record and when it got there it stayed for nearly two months. Why was it so enduring? Well, the UK record buying public had already shown in spectacular fashion in the 90s that it was an utter sucker for big ballads with the towering stretches at the top of the charts of “Love Is All Around” and “(Everything I Do) I Do It For You” and “Think Twice” was certainly a big ballad so maybe we shouldn’t have been too surprised by its success. Plus, Celine had already put us on notice of her penchant for a huge love song with her cover of Jennifer Rush’s “The Power Of Love” so she had it in her armoury to inflict some major damage on the charts. Added to all of that, “Think Twice” was written by Andy Hill and Peter Sinfield who had a history when it came to writing UK chart toppers having been responsible for “The Land Of Make Believe” for Bucks Fizz. Even so, the song’s tenure in the charts and slow gestation to becoming a No 1 did seem like an anomaly. I think I’ll leave it at that for now. Seven weeks at No 1? Sheesh!

Becoming more regular than Rishi Sunak reciting his five pledges, here comes another future No 1 and unbelievably it’s worse than Celine Dion’s chart topper. Much worse. We have reached a definite low point in 90s music. The time of Rednex is upon us. Who were these people that were responsible for one of the rottenest singles of the decade? Well, they were a trio of Swedish producers who hit upon the idea / dastardly plot to fuse Eurodance and American country folk music into a diabolical hybrid. The first result of this experiment of the devil was “Cotton Eye Joe”, a bastardised version of “Cotton Eyed Joe”, a 19th century song that possibly had its origins in the slave communities working on plantations in the Deep South. It’s a ridiculous notion cheaply executed.

They needed some stooges to front the single so they recruited this ragtag collection of…well…ragtags. To make the whole project look more authentic, they were given rustic stage names which only made the debacle look more risible. Ace Ratclaw, Boneduster Crock, Ken Tacky and my personal favourite Jiggie McClagganahan were just some of the pseudonyms used. With depressing predictability, “Cotton Eye Joe” went to No 1 all around Europe including the UK where it remained in pole position for three weeks. In fact, it would get to the top of the charts before Celine Dion and would be the record they kept her at No 2 for three consecutive weeks. So, let me get this straight; we are looking at ten weeks at No 1 spilt between records by Rednex and Celine Dion. Yeah, 1995, the year of Britpop my arse!

It’s purveyors of melodic UK rock Thunder next who had been having consistent yet decidedly average sized hits since the start of the decade. Albums wise it was a different story though. Their second album “Laughing On Judgement Day” had gone straight in at No 2 and sold 100,000 copies in 1992/3. This single – “Stand Up” – was the lead single from follow up “Behind Closed Doors” which itself went silver and peaked at No 5. However, “Stand Up” couldn’t disrupt the pattern of middling success for Thunder singles when it peaked at No 23. Of the eighteen UK Top 40 hits the band achieved, none went higher than No 18.

I don’t recall “Stand Up” at all but listening back to it, there’s a definite whiff of “Crazy Horses” by The Osmonds to it. No really, listen to that chugging guitar backing. Well, I guess as a rock band they couldn’t really have done a cover of “Love Me For A Reason” could they?! Ahem.

A true one hit wonder next – one huge, mega smash and then zip, nada, nothing although to be fair to Ini Kamoze, he had been around for years making reggae/dancehall material with the likes of Sly and Robbie before his big commercial breakthrough with “Here Comes The Hotstepper”. I didn’t know any of that at the time though. Like most of us I’m guessing, he was the man with the song that went “naaa na na na naaa etc” who also described himself as a “lyrical gangster” as mentioned by Jack Dee in his intro. You had to give it to Ini, his dancehall/hip-hop/ pop fusion tune was damned catchy but then he had lifted said “naaa” hook from “Land Of 1000 Dances” made most famous by Wilson Pickett.

Two other things spring to my mind when talking about “Here Comes The Hotstepper”. Firstly, its use in one of the worst films I’ve ever had the misfortune to see – Prêt–à–Porter. A satirical-comedy (supposedly) on the circus that is Paris Fashion Week, it is one of only two films I have ever considered walking out of. The other was Young Einstein starring Yahoo Serious which I did leave before the end and whilst I made it to the end of Prêt–à-Porter, it turned out that the two people I went to see it with had spent the entire movie on the verge of leaving as well.

Secondly, and I can find no evidence of this online but I’m sure that it happened, when one of those hit compilations came out around this time that included “Here Comes The Hotstepper”, the track listing didn’t show Ini Kamoze but ‘I’m A Kamikaze’. I swear this happened but 29 years later I can’t remember which hits album it was on. My first thought was the relevant entry in the Now series but all the images online of the track listing for Now 31 show the correct spelling. Maybe it was an error on initial copies and any reorders were corrected? I don’t know but I’m convinced that it happened. “Here Comes The Hotstepper” made No 4 in the UK and was a No 1 record the US.

And so to a band who did feel able to do a cover of The Osmonds’ “Love Me For A Reason” but then Boyzone were hardly Thunder. With Take That still at the height of their commercial appeal at this point, was there really a need or indeed gap in the market for another boy band? Apparently there was as the five, fresh faced Irish lads were up to No 2 with their debut UK hit. Before the 90s were said and done, they would have accrued a further 15 none of which peaked lower than No 4 and included 6 chart toppers. Admittedly, two thirds of them (and all of those No 1s) came after Take That had called it a day (or so we thought) in 1996 and there definitely was an opening down the boy band Job Centre. Even so, despite their obvious credentials for the position, you’d have to say they took full advantage of the opportunity.

The band set out their stall early on with this performance. Ronan Keating was clearly the main guy with his gold coloured jacket while the rest of them are in black but, as co-vocalist, Stephen Gateley gets to share the spotlight alongside Ronan. The other three guys are relegated to the back to spend most of their time doing what can only be described as ‘arm dancing’ – seriously, they hardly move their feet at all during the whole thing. Westlife would take this inaction to a new level when they turned up as the decade was ending and seemed to spend most of their time singing sickly ballads whilst sat on stools.

We end with another boy band (of sorts) as East 17 remain at the top with Christmas No 1 “Stay Another Day”. This was literally the moment when the band were at their peak. A week later they were deposed from their throne by Rednex and they would never return to the chart summit. That’s not to say they weren’t heard of again. 1995 would bring two more hit singles from their “Steam” album plus a third studio album in “Up All Night” with the lead single from it going to No 4. By early 1997 though, Brian Harvey had given that radio interview and things would start to unravel…

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	The Human League	Tell Me When	Nope
2	PJ & Duncan	Eternal Love	Nah
3	Celine Dion	Think Twice	As if
4	Rednex	Cotton Eye Joe	NO!!!
5	Thunder	Stand Up	Nah
6	~~I’m A Kamikaze~~ Ini Kamoze	Here Comes The Hotstepper	No but I think my wife did
7	Boyzone	Love Me For A Reason	Never happening
8	East 17	Stay Another Day	No

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001nq1m/top-of-the-pops-05011995

TOTP 08 DEC 1994

Posted on June 29, 2023 by 80stastic

Christmas is coming but the charts aren’t full of facts. The Top 40 announced on the Sunday before this TOTP contained incorrect information. Apparently there were some Woolworths shops that couldn’t retrieve their sales data to send to chart compilers Millward Brown so the tech guys were deployed to extract it. This they did except it was the wrong data. They just duplicated the Friday sales figures instead of Saturday’s and by the time the mistake was noticed it was too late as the Top 40 had been published and announced on Radio 1. Millward Brown chose to style it out by retrospectively compiling the correct chart but it was never made available to the public other than by using it as the basis for the ‘last week’ positions for the following week’s chart. It must have played havoc with the minds of all the Top 40 ~~nerds~~ devotees out there. TOTP decided to go with the chart that Radio 1 had initially announced rather than the revised one but in the end, the cock up hadn’t made that much difference to many records with only minor adjustments of a place or two being required – I think the biggest was that Mariah Carey should have been at No 5 rather than No 6.

Anyway, none of the above is mentioned by guest presenter Neneh Cherry who is the holder of the ‘golden mic’ chalice this week. Neneh had been back in the charts of course in a big way in 1994 alongside Youssou N’Dour on “7 Seconds” but even so, I’m not sure that she had the pull that she would have had 5 years previously. Still, she had a nice delivery style and brought a certain amount of credibility to proceedings. Her first job is to introduce the opening act who is Whigfield who had the unenviable task of trying to follow up a massive selling debut single somehow. And how do you do that? As we have seen so many times in the course of these TOTP repeats, you take the original record, add a few minor changes, give it a different song title and release it all over again. Listen to the banking track on “Another Day” – exactly the same as “Saturday Night”. To try and fool the record buying public into purchasing a single they’d already bought once, the producer behind the Whigfield brand – one Larry Pignagnoli – mixed things up by stealing the groove from Mungo Jerry’s 1970 No 1 “In The Summertime” (main Mungo Ray Dorset would receive a writing credit ultimately). It’s all very unsatisfactory and underhand really but it got Whigfield a Top 10 hit just in time for the Christmas party season. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – nice work if you can get it.

Of course, party dance tunes wasn’t the only way to bag yourself a Christmas hit. A nice ballad was also a strong and proven strategy. Many an artist had pulled off the trick of coming out with a ‘slowie’ in contrast to their previous material over the years – Wet Wet Wet (“Angel Eyes”), The Christians (“Ideal World”) and Bros (“Cat Among The Pigeons”) from the late 80s spring to mind but I’m sure there’s loads more examples. Not impervious to this idea were PJ & Duncan whose previous hits had all been uptempo examples of their brand of pop rap but the fifth single from their album “Psyche” and their fourth hit of the year broke that mould. I guess with a title like “Eternal Love” we shouldn’t have been surprised. Aimed squarely at the teenage girl’s market, it’s as wet and drippy as a poor quality nappy. Do you think this was their attempt at following in LL Cool J’s footsteps when he slowed things down for his hit “I Need Love”?

At this fledgling stage of their career, there were still a few things the duo had to sort out and come to a decision on. Firstly, PJ / Ant’s hat – what was that all about?! So that we could tell them apart?! I’m not sure how long this style affectation lasted but at some point it was ditched. Another style decision that was yet to be resolved was actually more of a staging conundrum. Who should stand where. These days, the fact that Ant stands to the left and Dec the right as we look at our TV screens (in reverse for them of course) is well established but it’s the other way round in this performance and I think it has been like that for every TOTP appearance so far. I wonder when and why they changed it? Is there some sort of feng shui consultant but for people whose services you can call upon?

Next up it’s the familiar video for Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You” after the The Ronnettes pastiche promo last time. Presumably it wasn’t that familiar back in 1994 though. You can’t avoid it now, so immeshed is it in our festive culture. You could just as easily make a case for a game of Mariah-geddon as Wham-a-geddon. In fact, so ubiquitous is the track that I think the fact that she did a whole album of Christmas songs is almost overlooked. Can you name any of the other tracks on that “Merry Christmas” album without either owning it or looking it up?

Apparently, there were other singles lifted from it (either for commercial release or promotional purposes) though not in the UK I believe. In other territories, “Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town” and “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) both charted but I’m fairly confident in saying that if you were to hear those songs played on radio in this country it would be the Bruce Springsteen and Darlene Love versions. Despite being No 1 in certain countries, the album only managed a peak of No 32 in the UK. Still, it’s all about that song isn’t it and it’s so far generated $80 million in royalties.

The first TOTP appearance next of a boy band that would last the decade and beyond despite the most inauspicious of beginnings. Boyzone were put together by Louis Walsh (who later found fame himself as a judge on TV shows X Factor and Popstars) with the direct intention of forming an Irish Take That (who were themselves put together by Nigel Martin-Smith to be a British New Kids On The Block). After auditioning 300 hopefuls, an initial six-piece outfit was established and they appeared on Irish talk show The Late Late Show in late 1993 to do…erm…this:

So when I said inauspicious beginnings earlier, what I actually meant was perhaps the most mortifying, ignominious debacle ever witnessed on TV. Sheesh! What were they thinking?! What was Louis Walsh thinking?! Was anybody thinking?! Despite that…whatever it was…the group weren’t killed stone dead by it and somehow got signed by Polygram. There were casualties though. Two of the original line up were ditched and were replaced by Mikey Graham who joined Roman Keating, Stephen Gately, Shane Lynch and Keith Duffy for the release of their debut single, a cover of the Frankie Valli And The Four Seasons / The Spinners hit “Working My Way Back To You” which was a success on the Irish chart but nowhere else. That was all the impetus they needed though and another cover of “Love Me For A Reason” (made famous by The Osmonds) would make them bona fide chart stars when it made No 2 over Christmas in the UK singles chart.

Watching this TOTP performance back, it’s clear that some drastic styling had gone on since that turn on The Late Late Show. They’ve all been kitted out with suits and super wide collar shirts to create a sense of unity and their dancing has been stripped back to a few synchronised arm movements and sidesteps. No more freestyle workouts for these boys. It just about hangs together well enough to deliver the song. They would go on to have another fifteen hit singles before the decade was out including six No 1s and six No 2s. The time of Boyzone (not Boys’ Own Neneh) was upon us.

Gloria Estefan does U2? Of course not – it’s not the same song at all although their similar titles could cause confusion I guess. Gloria’s hit is a cover of the 50s song “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me” taken from her album of the same name. U2, on the other hand, contributed a song to the soundtrack of the movie Batman Forever called “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me”. Hope that clarifies everything.

Gloria’s single did surprisingly well for her just missing out on the Top 10 by one place and thereby becoming her biggest hit since “Megamix / Miami Hit Mix” made No 8 promoting her Best Of album two years prior. You had to go back to 1989 and “Don’t Wanna Lose You” for her previous Top 10 hit. Maybe it was the Christmas factor that allowed Gloria to hit big with a familiar if not well known love song? She would never have such a high placing single in the UK charts again though she has continued to release albums up to the present day with the last being 2022’s Christmas collection. What with Gloria and Mariah both having done Christmas albums, all we need now is one from Madonna for a full set. Or maybe we don’t…need a Madonna Christmas album that is.

Now here’s EYC following the same game plan as PJ & Duncan earlier in that they’re ditching their usual high tempo mix of pop and R&B for a slow smoocher for the Christmas market. “One More Chance” was all sighs and harmonies but very little in the way substance or indeed a tune. In short, it was a stinker.

PJ & Duncan weren’t the only influence on the trio though. They must have been watching Boyzone in rehearsals with their shirts and suits and decided that they wanted a piece of that action. Are they morning suits they’re wearing?! They also seem to have pinched some of Ronan and co’s stripped back dance moves but then completely blow the whole effect by attempting to outdo them with the addition of a totally incongruous accessory. What were the white gloves all about? They look like snooker referees on the pull! Utter nonsense. Talk about “Snooker Loopy”! Brave heart though as I think this lousy lot have just one more hit single in them and then their table will have been cleared.

Cliff Richard is no stranger to a duet. He’s performed alongside the likes of Sarah Brightman, Elton John, Van Morrison, Olivia Newton John, Cilla Black and this guy – Phil Everly and not just once but twice. Back in 1983, Cliff and Phil took “She Means Nothing To Me” to No 9 in the UK charts. I didn’t mind it actually although obviously I never let anyone at school know this. Fast forward 11 years and the two were reunited for a curious collaboration. How so? Well, there was nothing particularly odd about their choice of song; “All I Have To Do Is Dream” had been a No 1 for The Everly Brothers in 1958 so it was a song Phil had been performing for over 35 years. Cliff meanwhile had his first hit “Move It” in the very same year so was a contemporary of Phil’s and would of course know the song. Cliff was promoting a Best Of collection for Christmas in 1994 called “The Hit List” which rounded up all his highest charting singles to date (those that went Top 5 or higher) but curiously also included one that only made No 15. “Miss You Nights” was a hit in 1976 but was included on “The Hit List” as it was a fan favourite.

“So what?” you may ask. Well, a remix of “Miss You Nights” was released as a single to promote the album which seems an unexpected choice of song given the nature of the album’s track listing criteria. That wasn’t all though. It was released as a double A-side single with a live version of “All I Have To Do Is Dream” which wasn’t on the album at all! OK, then maybe it was on an album by Phil Everly and it was promoting that? Not according to my research – his last solo album had been in 1983. There was a 105 track Everly Brothers box set released in 1994 but surely that would have been for super fans and completists only. I can’t believe the Cliff/Phil single was anything to do with that. So what was the rationale behind its release? Yes, obviously Christmas was on the way and Cliff had absolutely cornered the Christmas singles market in recent years but did his record company EMI really think he could garner another festive No 1 with this? In the end, it scampered up the charts to No 14 so nowhere near replicating the success of “Mistletoe And Wine” or “Saviour’s Day”. Phil never released another solo single after this whilst Cliff would return in 1995 with his musical project Heathcliff which he conceived, starred in and allowed him to release an album of songs from.

https://youtu.be/9W5h34PAumY

Next up is “the very attractive Jimmy Nail” according to Neneh Cherry. Jimmy’s transition from Oz in Auf Wiedersehen Pet, who was an extremely likeable character but hardly a pin up, to the sleek, some may say chiselled, pop star/actor we see here was quite a thing. Obviously he’d lost quite a bit of weight since he first appeared on our screens but was it also something to do with the more endearing roles we were seeing him perform in Spender and Crocodile Shoes? I think it’s a possibility.

Talking of roles, a reader reminded me in reply to a previous post where I wondered whatever happened to Jimmy that as well as the two shows mentioned above, he was also kept busy with a third and fourth series of Auf Wiedersehen Pet in 2002 and 2004 respectively and two hour long episodes called Au Revoir that were broadcast in the Christmas of 2004. As for “Crocodile Shoes” the single, was at its chart peak of No 4 this week; a significant success though I don’t think it ever really had a chance of being the Christmas No 1.

East 17 are No 1 with “Stay Another Day” and will remain there for 5 weeks to become the festive chart topper as well. As I recall, the Christmas chart was actually announced on the TOTP broadcast on the big day itself and I was convinced that Oasis would pip both East 17 and Mariah Carey to the crown with their standalone single “Whatever”. They seemed to have timed its release just right with it being available for the first time just the week before and with the buzz about the band reaching boiling point and judging by the amounts we were selling if it in the Our Price store in Market Street, Manchester, it seemed like a shoo-in to me. I was amazed when they were announced at No 3 and cried foul, stating something didn’t smell right. However, there were no such stories of rigging in the papers and media. I clearly was letting my Oasis tinted glasses cloud my judgement.

The Walthamstow boys were rightly crowned the Kings of Christmas and their song has gone into the great cannon of festive tunes. Although we get another studio appearance here, there were actually two promo videos made for the single though I only remember seeing one of them at the time. I assume they were made at the same time but the one I saw back in 1994 was the one of the bend seen laying down the track in a recording studio. The one that we now see every December of the band in oversized, white fur trimmed parkas shot in black and white floating about in a snow storm shocked me when I first saw it as it was many years after 1994 and I’d long since left working in record shops behind. How could I have missed seeing it in all those intervening years?

And that’s a wrap for 1994 here at TOTP Rewind. The shows broadcast on the 15th and 22nd December were pulled from the BBC4 repeats schedule as they both featured Gary Glitter. I’ve checked the running order for those shows though and we’re not missing much. Rednex, Mighty Morph’n Power Rangers, Celine Dion, Zig & Zag…it couldn’t be much worse. They did show the Christmas Day edition hosted by Take That (obviously) but it didn’t feature any hits I hadn’t already commented on and so I’m not regurgitating all that again. I will do my own review of 1994 post (the epilogue) as usual though.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Whigfield	Another Day	As if
2	PJ & Duncan	Eternal Love	Infernal racket more like! No!
3	Mariah Carey	All I Want For Christmas Is You	Nope
4	Boyzone	Love Me For A Reason	No
5	Gloria Estefan	Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me	Nah
6	EYC	One More Chance	No chance more like!
7	Cliff Richard & Phil Everly	All I Have To Do Is Dream	Didn’t happen
8	Jimmy Nail	Crocodile Shoes	I did not
9	East 17	Stay Another Day	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001mwfx/top-of-the-pops-08121994

TOTP 13 OCT 1994

Posted on June 6, 2023 by 80stastic

Dearie me. The running order for this TOTP looks especially uninspiring. What am I going to say about this lot? Even Simon ‘Smug’ Mayo isn’t the presenter for me to throw the word equivalent of rotten apples at as it’s Mr Nice himself instead, the completely inoffensive Mark Goodier.

*Starts watching the show*

Woah! Stop right there! What am I looking at?! It’s as if Mark Goodier himself had just read my comments about him being incapable of being abused because he’s just too nice and said “Hold my beer!” because he’s had an image change and turned up as a dead ringer for Jazz Club host Louis ‘Nice’ Balfour from The Fast Show. What was he thinking?! This can’t have been deliberate on Goodier’s part to look like John Thomson’s character surely? Or is it just coincidence? Is it possible that Goodier may not have even seen the BBC’s new comedy series? It first aired on 27 September so maybe three episodes had gone out by the time this TOTP aired? Is it feasible that he missed them all and so had never laid eyes on the fictional Mr Balfour? Whatever the truth, there’s no denying the similarities.

Anyway, we start with Ant & Dec when they were still known as PJ & Duncan who I’m sure we’re on the show just the other week with “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble” but are already back with a follow up called “If I Give You My Number”. This was their third consecutive UK Top 40 hit peaking at No 15. Their run of charting singles would extend to 13 in total if you only count those whilst they were an ongoing, active concern as a pop act (i.e. between 1993 and 1997). It’s 15 though if you count their 2002 World Cup song and a 2013 rerelease of the aforementioned “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble”. That’s a lot of hits but how many could you name off the top of your head? Just “Rhumble” right? Don’t sweat it. I worked in record shops selling the damn things for the entirety of their pop career and I could only come up with two more than that – “Shout” and a cover of “Stepping Stone” made famous by The Monkees.

So what was “If I Give You My Number” like? Well it was somewhere on the spectrum of poor to shite clearly. It didn’t have the playground chant appeal of “Rhumble” but instead, in places, seemed like a poor attempt to rewrite “Jump” by Kris Kross. Given the what I always thought of as a manufactured confusion about which one was Ant and which one was Dec early in their TV career, were there signs of this being a genuine problem during their PJ & Duncan incarnation? Ant/PJ seemed to be cast as the one in a hat whilst Dec/Duncan was the one with the oh so mid 90s pair of curtains haircut. As Louis Balfour would say, “NICE”.

What better way to follow up two ex-Byker Grove stars rapping than with some bland Eurodance? As well as having a penchant for song titles which included the letter ‘U’ substituting for the word ‘you’ and the number ‘2’ for the word ‘to’ (“U Got 2 Know”, “U Got 2 Let The Music” and “U & Me”), Cappella now seemed to be branching out to corner the market in dance tracks with the word ‘Move’ in their title. “Move It Up” was their second hit of 1994 to follow this trend after “Move On Baby” earlier in the year. Look, I’m sorry but I really have had enough of Eurodance and I’m not sure I’ve got anything to say about Cappella…except…what’s the deal with the rapper guy sitting on a throne in this performance? The optics on it are rather jarring. A man sits in an elevated position on a symbol of power overlooking five women who seem to be cavorting about for his pleasure and entertainment whilst he appears displeased by their efforts. Who thought that was a good idea?

I’m wondering whether, by the mid 90s, Gloria Estefan was running out of ideas artistically speaking. I mean you could argue (if you were being extremely harsh) that she only ever had two anyway – the Latin flavoured, uptempo dance numbers (“Get On Your Feet”, “1-2-3”, “Rhythm Is Gonna Get You”) and the huge, schmaltzy ballads (“Anything For You”, “Don’t Wanna Lose You”, “Coming Out Of The Dark”). As I say, if you were being really harsh. However, by 1994 her last three albums had been a Greatest Hits, a Spanish language collection and a Christmas album. To complete the set, Gloria chose to record an album of cover versions, the ultimate sign that the creative well has run dry.

However, “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me” would prove to be a wise move by Gloria peaking at No 5 in the UK and selling 300,000 copies over here and 2 million in the US. Featuring covers of songs by the likes of Neil Sedaka, Elton John and Carole King. And Vicki Sue Robinson. Who? Well, she was an American actress and singer who’s biggest hit was the disco staple “Turn The Beat Around”. A Top 10 hit Stateside and on the track listing for many a disco compilation, it was never actually a hit in the UK. Gloria’s version would correct that when it peaked at No 21.

Before the next act, and in anticipation off the new No 1, we get a message from Take That from Belfast where they are on tour. It’s fairly inane stuff only made even noticeable by the fact that Robbie Williams sits with his back to camera for most of it presumably to make him look interesting…oh and to show off the fact that he’s had the figure ‘1’ shaved into the back of his head. How little did we know of the trauma to come for many a young teenage girl in just nine months time when Robbie would leave the band.

Right, this is all very odd. A record by Snap! that I don’t actually mind. “Welcome To Tomorrow (Are You Ready?)” wasn’t an in your face, bass pumping, klaxon blaring dance anthem like “The Power” but a lilting, whimsical tune that was actually melodic and almost charming. How had this happened? Well, yeah, obviously they’d gotten rid of rapper Turbo B. That seemed to be the crucial factor in the transformation. Like Cappella before them, Snap! seemed to be in the midst of a song title fetish that dictated that every single they released had to include some brackets somewhere. The single before this was called “Do You See The Light (Looking For)” and the one after it “The First The Last Eternity (Till The End)”. What was the point of them? Was it the Robbie Williams effect, trying to make them seem more exotic? There have been many an example of this practice down the years but perhaps two of the most irritating are “I Knew You Were Waiting (For Me)” by George Michael and Aretha Franklin and “(Don’t You) Forget About Me” by Simple Minds. Just WHY?

Oh come on now! I believe this is the fourth appearance on the show by Lisa Loeb And Nine Stories with “Stay (I Missed You)” – BRACKETS! – which seems a bit over the top for a song that peaked at No 6. I mean it was in the Top 20 for six weeks, the Top 20 for nine and the Top 40 as a whole for thirteen so it had some legs I guess but four times on the show?! One was a live by satellite performance, one was the video and the other two were in the studio of which this one is just a repeat of the first time. Curiously, Goodier introduces it as “still a Top 10 record” which suggests it’s falling down the chart maybe? There’s no caption for it detailing its chart position so just what number was it at?

* Checks chart rundown*

So it was at No 8. Now given that the record stayed at No 8 for three weeks, it could be a non mover. I’ll check. Wait there…

*Checks chart for this week*

Yep. This was its second week of those three so definitely a non-mover. Historically, TOTP had a policy of only featuring records going up the chart plus the No 1. I can’t recall what the rule was about non-movers but clearly they were deemed still valid in 1994 by head producer Ric Blaxill. Surely this must be the last time on the show for this one though. Lisa, Go (I won’t miss you). BRACKETS!

A future No 1 incoming now as we get the video for Pato Banton and his cover of “Baby Come Back”. I should say Pato Banton featuring Ali and Robin Campbell of UB40 of course. As this will be No 1 soon enough, I think I’ll just leave these chart stats here for this post:

Topped UK singles chart for 4 weeks
Finished the year as the fourth best selling single of 1994 in the UK
Spent 10 weeks inside the Top 10
Spent 4 months on the Top 40
Actually started going back up the charts in week 15 of its chart life

Despite working in record shops for virtually the whole of the 90s, I quite often get tripped up in these reviews by songs or acts I’ve either erased from my memory banks or who had completely passed me by at the time. The next artist is an example of the latter circumstance but watching them back now, how on earth did I miss this uneven paving stone?

Apparently, 2wo Third3 (terrible, terrible name) were the brainchild of pop impresario/manager Tom Watkins whose artist roster also includes Pet Shop Boys and Bros in the 80s and East 17 in the 90s. His new creation were an openly gay four piece pop group – sort of like Bronski Beat but without the credibility and with a much cheesier sound. You’ll notice only three members on stage here though as the fourth member was the non-performing songwriter Richard Stannard who was nicknamed Biff and is represented by the cartoon character displayed behind the band. Well, East 17 had that dog logo – it must have been a thing with Watkins. Also a thing with him was style over content. 2wo Third3 was all about image and promotion – London design firm Form were employed to produce the group’s record sleeves and promotional material which included yellow rubber gloves (check the single glove the lead singer is wearing) and Biff plasters being sent out to fans and promoters. To help get their name (terrible as it was) out there, they supported East 17 on their 1994 world tour (of course they did).

All this promotion finally worked when, after their first two singles failed to crack the Top 40, they finally crowbarred their way in with “I Want The World”. I mean, it’s catchy and all and I’m guessing it went down a storm in gay clubs but it was never going to be anything more than a disposable, here today gone tomorrow pop tune. There is something captivating about their TOTP performance though. I’m not sure if it’s the Biff logo or the way the two keyboard players double up as dancers by deserting their instruments and coming to the front of the stage to bust some moves. Or is it the lead singer’s customised stool that allows him to tower above the studio audience? How very Julian Cope of him!

“I Want The World” peaked at No 20 whilst a follow up “I Want To Be Alone” (make your mind up!) made it to No 29 and that was it. An album was recorded but never released. Biff went on to write mega-hits for Spice Girls and 5ive (another terrible name) whilst the lead singer reappeared in 2007 as 4th Child (what was it with numbers in their names!). As for the other two, one went into music publishing and the other went back to being a plumber. Well, pop songs are all very well but who are you going to call when your toilet won’t flush eh?

https://youtu.be/SsoHUaxyAe4

The biggest name of the night makes an appearance now. Despite his huge success as part of The Police and a solo career that had delivered four massive selling albums (including two No 1s), when it came to singles, Sting was an underperformer – less sting, more minor skin irritation. Up to this point he’d never had a single even make the Top 10 let alone top the charts but “When We Dance” would finally provide him with one by peaking at No 9.

This was one of two new songs written to help promote a Greatest Hits album. “Fields Of Gold: The Best Of Sting 1984-1994” collected the singles from those four solo albums into a handy one stop shop and it was a big seller too. Triple platinum over here, double platinum in the US; it was official – Sting could shift albums. Those pesky singles though. Until “When We Dance”, his highest charting song was “Russians” which made No 12 in 1985 (I’m not counting his part in that trio with Bryan Adams and Rod Stewart on “All For Love” which made No 2). Even singles that still get played on the radio today and which you immediately associate with him like “If You Love Somebody Set Them Free” only made No 26.

Anyway, he finally got his Top 10 solo hit with “When We Dance” but I can think of loads of other Sting songs that are more deserving than this soporific, generic ballad. “Fortress Around Your Heart”, “Love Is The Seventh Wave”, “We’ll Be Together”…all more better tracks in my opinion. Mr Sumner had already done a very slow paced song with the word ‘dance’ in the title back in 1988 on his “…Nothing Like The Sun” album called “They Dance Alone”. Seems Sting liked a slow dance number.

Coincidentally, he collaborated the following year with the aforementioned Pato Banton on a cover of “Spirits In The Material World” for the Ace Ventura soundtrack. Inevitably with such a bad idea, it was awful. Sting obviously liked that sort of reggae hook up though as he would infamously make an album with Shaggy in 2018. He got away with it too – it went to No 9 in the charts.

https://youtu.be/MkTtKV04uKE

And so to the new No 1 courtesy of Take That and we get an exclusive live performance of “Sure” from what I presume is their concert in Belfast from where they did their live message earlier in the show. Curiously though, it sounds and feels like a dress rehearsal – although we can see an audience there, we can’t hear them much. Maybe they were turned down in the mix by the sound people.

P.S. To say I was worried I wouldn’t have much to write about a fairly uninspiring line up, I seem to have written quite a bit. Go me!

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	PJ & Duncan	If I Give You My Number	Of course not
2	Cappella	Move It up	Never happening
3	Gloria Estefan	Turn The Beat Around	Nope
4	Snap!	Welcome To Tomorrow (Are You Ready?)	Pleasant tune but no
5	Lisa Loeb And Nine Stories	Stay (I Missed You)	I did not
6	Pato Banton	Baby Come Back	Nah
7	2wo Third3	I Want The World	No
8	Sting	When We Dance	Another no
9	Take That	Sure	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001m6qq/top-of-the-pops-13101994

TOTP 04 AUG 1994

Posted on May 8, 2023 by 80stastic

Due to BBC4’s relentless schedule of broadcasting two TOTP repeats a week (which is killing me by the way), we’ve already reached August of 1994. And we know what August means…the start of a new football season. On the very day this show aired, Spurs bought Jürgen Klinsmann from Monaco and despite playing for them for just one season, would become a fan favourite, rebuilding his reputation in England as being a ‘diver’ thanks to this celebration on his debut…

Thank God tonight’s presenter isn’t Spurs fan Simon ‘Smug’ Mayo or we’d have to suffer a whole show of him making endless ‘hilarious’ football references. Instead it’s Mark Goodier who I don’t think has ever even attempted to make a funny quip in his life. Looking at the running order for this show, it’s pretty underwhelming I have to say. So underwhelming that to try and big it up, Goodier announces as a future ‘highlight’ that Status Quo will be making their 100th appearance on the show. TOTP seemed to have a weakness for and reliance on The Quo when it came to creating a buzz about the show. In the first show of the ‘year zero’ revamp, they had them on to perform “Let’s Work Together” as a track from their latest album which seemed counter productive to an attempt to relaunch the show for a younger audience. That tie between the BBC and the band was severed though in 1996 when Radio 1 blacklisted their single “Fun Fun Fun” (a collaboration with The Beach Boys) on the grounds that they were repositioning themselves as a youth station and Status Quo were…well, no longer the status quo. The band took it badly and launched an unsuccessful legal action for a judicial review of the ban on their records. In 1994 though, they were still seen as a draw by the Beeb and they’ll be along soon enough.

If Messrs Rossi, Parfitt et al would find themselves in a metaphorical boxing ring with Radio 1, we start the show in an actual boxing ring as Maxx have decided to perform their new single in one. The follow up to No 4 hit “Get-A-Way”, “No More (I Can’t Stand It)” was more of the same, in other words a huge steaming pile of Eurodance dung. Has there ever been a more apt song title? So why the boxing ring? I’ve no idea but the track certainly doesn’t deliver a knockout punch. As it’s nearly 30 years ago, there’s still some sexual stereotyping going on with the boxers being men and the women on stage (apart from singer Linda Meek) are styled as ring girls announcing what round it is. Actually, is that still how it works in 2023? I know that the profile of women boxing is much higher these days but are ring girls still a thing? I’m not a big fight fan. Definitely still a thing are Maxx who reactivated in 2016 after initially folding in 1995, although Linda Meek now goes by the name of Elyse G Rogers and rapper Gary Bokoe has been replaced by someone called Twitch.

Right, I’m calling it. This must be the very last appearance on TOTP by Level 42. Not only is “Love In A Peaceful World” their very last UK Top 40 hit (it made No 31) but the band broke up in the October of this year and didn’t reform until the new millennium and didn’t release any new material until September 2006, two months after the last ever TOTP aired. I think that’s a cast-iron defence of my opening statement. Despite metamorphosing from Britfunk pioneers into a mega-hit making machine, the band have often been pigeonholed as vapid and bland. I have to admit to liking a handful of their songs – “Hot Water” is a great track – but I’ve never been tempted to actually buy any of their stuff.

Looking at their career in terms of a story arc though, a decent documentary could be made of it. A group of friends from the Isle of Wight relocate to the big smoke where one of them learns the bass and becomes one of the world’s most renowned bass guitarists. They start playing a brand of jazz funk fusion attracting record company interest before a change of musical direction towards pop brings huge mainstream success. Alas, the march of time catches up with them and they find themselves marginalised in the musical landscape. Add to that relationship breakdowns within the band causing line up changes (over 20 people have been band members at some point over the years) and finally tragedy with a founding member committing suicide and it’s quite a tale.

As a valedictory single, “Love In A Peaceful World” isn’t the worst way to bow out. A pleasant tune with an admirable message, I could imagine it being used in a rom com film to great effect. Sadly, and as an indication of where the band were, it only got to No 31. They remain, however, active within and a big draw of the live circuit.

https://youtu.be/vk2v6F7i_Gw

Right who’s next? Ce Ce Peniston with a song that isn’t “Finally”? Eh? Yes, well she did have more than the one hit – in fact, she had seven of which “Hit By Love” was the sixth. I think most of us would struggle to name more than “Finally” though wouldn’t we? What? “We Got A Love Thang”? Oh yeah. It made the Top 10. Surely no more than that though? Sorry? “Somebody Else’s Guy”? That’s Jocelyn Brown’s big hit! Say again? Ce Ce Peniston had equally as big a hit with it in 1997 to promote her Best Of album? Oh come on! Nobody associates that song with her! “Hit By Love” sounds like a rewrite of “Finally” to me, trying to recreate that winning formula but not quite getting there. A bit like in Breaking Bad when Todd takes over the production of the blue crystal meth and can’t get the content as pure as Walter White. Erm…anyway, Ce Ce doesn’t need a methamphetamine hit as she is high on love according to her song but the biggest chart high she could achieve with it was No 33. Unlike Roxy Music, love was not the drug for her.

And so to Status Quo who are in the studio for the 100th time with a little ditty called “I Didn’t Mean It”. I don’t remember this one at all and have to admit that my expectations for it were low. It was the lead single from their 21st studio album “Thirsty Work” and was written by one John David, a Welsh producer, songwriter and musician who had performed with some big names like Springsteen, Clapton and Sting and written for the likes of Cliff Richard, Shakin’ Stevens, Alvin Stardust and Samantha Fox. Hmm. I’m noticing a slight disparity between the calibre of artists he performed with and those he wrote for but never mind. He also worked with Dave Edmunds which is not surprising as “I Didn’t Mean It” has a flavour of Edmunds about it or maybe Nick Lowe with some honky tonk piano to the fore. Now I like both Edmunds and Lowe so I’m probably doing them a disservice by associating them with this track which isn’t really worthy of their name. It’s all very predictable and what I would have expected Status Quo to have been churning out at this time. It seems very anachronistic compared to their chart peers at the time. Maybe they should have seen the BBC bust up writing on the wall.

The cover of the single is more interesting than the song with images of famous people that maybe had regrets about what they had done (I didn’t mean it -geddit?) so there’s Ken Dodd (tax evasion court case – acquitted) Diego Maradona (‘Hand of God’ goal – cheated ) Lester Piggott (tax fraud case – guilty), Richard Nixon (Watergate scandal – resigned) Robert Maxwell (Mirror Group Pension Fund scandal – fraudulent misappropriation), Mike Tyson (rape conviction – guilty) Graham Taylor (failed to get England to World Cup in USA) and Ben Johnson (disqualified for doping in 1988 Olympics and stripped of gold medal). The inclusion of some of those names seems a little ill judged, especially Mike Tyson and Robert Maxwell given the damage they did to people’s lives. Sadly for Status Quo, Radio 1 did mean it when it came to not playing their records any more when 1996 rolled around.

Another diminutive dance diva who’s probably best known for just one song next. After Ce Ce Peniston earlier comes Rozalla who is surely best known for her “Everybody’s Free (To Feel Good)” hit from 1991 but who was still knocking about the charts three years later with this track “This Time I Found Love”, the second single from her “Look No Further” album. I haven’t got that much to say about this one – not really my bag but I will comment on the solo male dancer up there with Rozalla. I’m not sure that he really adds anything to the performance with his Marcel Marceau routine. In short, he looks like a prat. While we’re at it, did the two keyboard players need to be there either? Couldn’t Rozalla have just done her turn on her own? Maybe some rules about musician unions were at play. “This Time I Found Love” peaked at No 33.

What the hell are Whitesnake doing on TOTP in 1994 with a song from 1987?! It’s no great mystery really. “Is This Love” was rereleased to promote a Greatest Hits album that was presumably to plug a gap in the band’s career – they hadn’t had a studio album out since 1989. The Greatest Hits package was a reasonable success peaking at No 4 and going gold in the UK. It essentially covered their final three albums of the 80s but curiously didn’t include the two singles from 1984’s “Slide It In” that were actual UK Top 40 hits – “Guilty Of Love” and “Give Me More Time” though the former did feature in a 2022 reissue of the album.

I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again – the intro to “Is This Love” always catches me out as it sounds like the start of Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ On A Prayer”. That slowly rising synth fade in is almost exactly the same in both. The 1994 rerelease of “Is This Love” made No 25 (it peaked at No 9 in 1987) and was Whitesnake’s final UK Top 40 entry. Oh, one final thing, why isn’t there a question mark at the end of the song title? Bugs the hell out of me!

It’s PJ & Duncan next with “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble”. Although this is probably their most well known tune, the duo clocked up an impressive thirteen Top 40 hits in the UK before the end of the 90s with eleven of them peaking between Nos 16 and 10. The last four were released under the names Ant & Dec. They would return to the charts twice more, once in 2002 with the official England World Cup song “We’re On The Ball” (No 3) and again in 2013 when “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble” was rereleased and went to No 1 with sales being donated to the charity ChildLine.

Of course, these two weren’t the only pop band to come out of the children’s TV series Byker Grove. There was also Byker Groove (clever) featuring Donna Air, Jayni Hoy and Vicky Taylor who got to No 48 with “Love Your Sexy…!!”. Two years later, they returned without Taylor and rebranded as Crush with the single “Jellyhead” which should have been a huge hit but which stalled at No 50. With its name checks for Bros and The Prodigy in its lyrics, it’s what The Reynolds Girls should have sounded like and perhaps what Girls Aloud would go on to sound like. It did well in America where it was promoted without any reference to their acting past. Donna Air would go on to have a career as an actor and TV presenter but you’d have to say that she didn’t quite scale the same heights of fame as her two Byker Grove chums.

Finally a record of interest. Even if you didn’t appreciate it sonically, you could hardly ignore this single, probably because you couldn’t avoid it – “7 Seconds” by Youssou N’Dour and Neneh Cherry was the second most played song on UK radio in 1994. The very definition of a sleeper hit, it took nine weeks to break into the Top 10 before rising to a peak of No 3. Such a chart trajectory was unusual around this time and would become almost unheard of as the 90s progressed and record companies discovered heavy discounting of singles in their first week of release to create high chart entry positions. Yet there was something about the summer of 1994 which saw a swathe of records that had incredibly long stays within the Top 40. I’m thinking “Crazy For You” by Let Loose, “I Swear” by All 4 One and of course Wet Wet Wet’s 15 weeks chart topper “Love Is All Around”.

Whilst all of the above though were propelled by a traditional momentum (a classic piece of airplay friendly pop, a big swoonsome ballad and a cover version of a well known song given huge exposure by a runaway box office hit film), “7 Seconds” was different. For a start, the artists involved were not chart guarantors by any stretch of the imagination. Youssou N’Dour was a huge name in World music but had never had a hit single before (his collaboration with Peter Gabriel on “Shakin’ The Tree” was the closest he had ever come). Meanwhile, Neneh Cherry was a long way from the huge breakthrough star she had been in 1989 when the likes of “Buffalo Stance” and “Manchild” were huge Top 5 hits. Her second album “Homebrew” had not done anywhere near the numbers of her debut “Raw Like Sushi” and had provided just two minor hit singles. The combination of the two of them on a track seemed an unlikely proposition for huge chart success. And yet…there was something about this haunting, rich synth heavy ballad that was sung in three different languages that gave it global appeal. A huge hit around Europe (it was No 1 in France for 16 weeks – have that Marti Pellow!), it was a monster both on the airwaves and the cash registers. Youssou would never have another UK hit single whilst Neneh would score a No 1 with “Love Can Build A Bridge” in 1995 as part of the charity collective for Comic Relief and a Top 10 single in “Woman” the following year.

It’s week 10 for Wet Wet Wet and “Love Is All Around” which means we are two thirds through their reign at the top. I struggled to say anything else about this record in the last post and things haven’t improved since. I’ve got some things to say about its demise but I need to keep those back for use in a few posts time. OK, how about addressing one of the record’s most distinctive bits, the guttural sound that Marti Pellow makes as the song heads into its climax. I think he growls “yeah!” and it sounds like that on the version that was released but I’m sure in some of the performances we’ve seen on the show over the weeks it sounds more like a “hey!”.

Whatever. It did get me thinking about songs with grunts, growls, screams or generally unusual vocal noises in them. First to come to mind was the “Ohhh!” by John Travolta in “Summer Nights” quickly followed by the “Ooo!” by Lionel Richie in “Easy” by The Commodores. Then there’s Paul McCartney’s strangled yelp in “Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?” and who could ignore Robert Plant at the start of “Immigrant Song”? think my favourite though comes at 1:43 in this clip…

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Maxx	“No More (I Can’t Stand It)”	I couldn’t have said it better myself
2	Level 42	Love In A Peaceful World	Nope
3	Ce Ce Peniston	Hit By Love	No
4	Status Quo	I Didn’t Mean It	As if
5	Rozalla	This Time I Found Love	Negative
6	Whitesnake	Is This Love	Not in 1987 nor 1994
7	PJ & Duncan	Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble	Nah
8	Youssou N’Dour and Neneh Cherry	7 Seconds	I did not
9	Wet Wet Wet	Love Is All Around	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001ldnz/top-of-the-pops-04081994

TOTP 21 JUL 1994

Posted on April 29, 2023 by 80stastic

After one ‘Julian C’ on the show last week in the form of Julian Cope, we have another tonight as Julian Clary takes on the role of presenter. Now, I’m wondering if this was quite the controversial choice on behalf of head producer Ric Blaxill as just seven months before, Clary had caused a furore at the British Comedy Awards when he had compared the set to Hampstead Heath and joked that he’d just been fisting former Chancellor of the Exchequer Norman Lamont backstage. The uproarious audience reaction meant that his punchline “Talk about a red box!” went largely unnoticed. However, the damage had been done for The Daily Mail and The Sun who campaigned to have Julian banned from TV. Haven’t moved on much in 30 years have we?

Anyway, was seven months a big enough time gap for all that media outrage to have died down? Ric Blaxill must have been hoping that the public were at the stage where the opportunity for offence had dissipated but the potential for a return to the public consciousness moments of “did you see that on TOTP last night?” was still very much alive. I’m thinking the debut of Boy George on the show in 1982 or Nirvana in 1991. Julian was, no doubt, a big name by 1994 and not just because of his Lamont moment. I think I was first aware of him (and Fanny the Wonder Dog) in the 80s on Friday Night Live and then his game show Sticky Moments With Julian Clary. He’d even released a single in 1988 – a cover of “Leader Of The Pack” under the name of The Joan Collins Fanclub. I wonder if Julian’s turn on tonight’s show would have caused a bulging Points Of View post bag or not?

Well, Julian has certainly come dressed for the occasion in leopard print cat suit and a feather boa accessory and he gets us raving (his word) straight away with Clubhouse and “Living In The Sunshine”. Bizarrely, despite working in record shops whilst these Italian house merchants were having a couple of hits in 1994, the only single of theirs I can remember is their Steely Dan / Michael Jackson mash up “Do It Again” from a decade earlier. There’s a scientific term for this phenomenon which is the ‘reminiscence bump’ – people tend to disproportionately recall memories from when they were aged 10 to 30. Well, I was 26 in 1994 and 15 in 1983 so does that prove the theory or not? Maybe 30 is pushing it a bit. Maybe 10-21 is more like it? Or maybe I don’t recall “Living In The Sunshine” because it’s utterly forgettable crap? The only notable thing about this performance is the Punch and Judy show. Not sure that would be allowed these days or are they just dancing together in which case maybe it would? Is this is the one and only case of a Punch and Judy prop being used on the show? I think there’s one in the video for “Look Of Love” by ABC and Mud had that ventriloquist dummy for “Lonely Thus Christmas” didn’t they but not a Punch and Judy. Even Marillion didn’t gave that and they had a song called “Punch and Judy”!

Julian is getting into his stride now (literally) as he walks across the stage in front of the next artist whilst they have already started their song, salaciously referring to testosterone and pectorals but then it is a boy band he’s talking about and as he says, “what else is there?”. Bad Boys Inc were onto their fifth of six hit singles by this point and this one – “Take Me Away (I’ll Follow You)” – would prove to be their second biggest when it peaked at No 15. Dearie me though, this was so depressingly average, even by boy band standards. They really were the dregs of that particular genre and that’s allowing for the fact that the 90s were full of sub par, wannabe hopefuls looking to be the next Take That. The song is so piss weak and sounds like it was written in about the same amount of time it’s taken Julian Clary to get his make up touched up which we playfully get to see whilst Bad Boys Inc are on stage. Apparently Bad Boy Ally Begg (the one in the white long sleeved shirt) went onto become a sports TV presenter and doesn’t really like to talk about his time as a boy band member – his website glosses over that period of his life saying if you want to know about it then just Google Bad Boys Inc. He’s right to be ashamed.

https://youtu.be/DfibBB5ebak

Oh god! This is yet another song that takes me right back to the Summer of 1994 when I was selling loads of it during an unhappy stint working at the Our Price store in Piccadilly, Manchester. Even just seeing the single’s cover in its Wikipedia entry is giving me the fear. “Regulate” by Warren G and Nate Dogg spent eight consecutive weeks inside the Top 10 peaking at No 5 and was taken from the soundtrack to the film Above The Rim. Part of the emerging West Coast G-funk scene, Warren G hung with his hounds Snoop Doggy Dogg and Nate Dogg and was also the half brother of Dr. Dre so I guess we shouldn’t have been surprised that he would bag himself an enormous hit before too long. What was a surprise though, given all those rap connections, was that his hit was predominantly based around a classic soft rock track. “I Keep Forgettin’ (Every Time You’re Near)” had been a No 4 US hit for yacht rocker Michael McDonald in 1982 (not that anyone was using that term back then) but somehow it was able to be recycled for a classic gangsta funk track. Just to make it stand out even more, its intro samples some dialogue from the 1988 film Young Guns, specifically around the Lincoln County Regulators, a deputised posse that fought in the Lincoln County War in the late 19th century and from which the track took its name. The video shown here includes clips from Above The Rim which featured Tupac Shakur just to up the content on the rapper-o-meter for this track as if it needed any more.

“Regulate” was a smash all around the globe leading to Warren G cranking out another five hits in the UK alone including a couple of No 2s before the decade was out. He missed a trick though by not forming a supergroup called G-Force alongside Ali G, Kenny G and Stevie G.

As announced at the top of the show by the lead singer in that direct to camera slot, The Grid are back on the show for a third time I believe with their mega hit “Swamp Thing” As with their previous appearances, they’re doing exactly the same performance with the banjo player stuck under a space age hairdryer or something. They could have thought of a different staging for a third appearance couldn’t they?

https://youtu.be/qEV4q3n91yc

Some 29 years on from this huge track, another dance phenomenon has entered social parlance but this time around it’s not The Grid but ‘The Griddy’*

*With thanks to my teenage son for alerting me to this.

The profusion of reggae fusion chart hits that started in 1993 with the likes of Shaggy and Bitty McLean was still going strong over 12 months later. One of its least worthy proponents was this guy – C. J. Lewis – who’d already had success with his No 3 cover of “Sweets For My Sweet” some months earlier and now he was at it again by desecrating the classic Stevie Wonder song “Uptight (Everything’s Alright)”.

C.J. (real name Stephen James Lewis so shouldn’t that be S. J. Lewis?) tries to make the song his own (to quote Louis Walsh) by reordering the words in the title to read “Everything Is Alright (Uptight)”. Yeah, that’s worked a treat mate. This is just a horrible abomination. C.J. spends most of his time toasting “Ribidibidoo-badey” to a bemused looking studio audience who shuffle about pretending to dance for the duration of the song. Compare it with this TOTP performance of the original by Stevie and…well, there is no comparison.

Two years on from this, the song was in the news again when Oasis recorded “Step Out” and were asked for 6% royalties by Wonder due to its similarities to “Uptight (Everything’s Alright)”. The Manc lads didn’t want to do that so removed it from the track listing for their second album “(What’s The Story) Morning Glory?”. When it did appear as an extra track on the “Don’t Look Back In Anger” single, it included a credit for Wonder alongside co-songwriters Sylvia Moy and Henry Cosby.

I think Julian Clary has kept it the right side of respectable so far given the restrictions of the 9 o’clock watershed but he can’t help himself when doing the link to The B–52’s and their “(Meet) The Flintstones” single banging on about sniffing loincloths and having a gay old time. Well, I guess that was what he was invited on for. A second Flintstones film came out in 2000 called The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas but none of the stars of the 1994 original reprised their roles. The brand new cast couldn’t replicate the success of its predecessor and it completely bombed at the box office. In a nice (if tenuous) little connection to this edition of TOTP, the second film featured Joan Collins in the supporting cast. Joan Collins? Julian Clary? The Joan Collins Fan Club? Oh, please yourselves!

It’s time for some rockin’ next courtesy of Skin. What was it with all these British rock bands of the 90s that they all wanted to be the next Led Zeppelin? That certainly seemed to be the case with the lead singers who were all intent on doing their best Robert Plant impression (I’m ignoring Julian’s comment about all that hair in show making them look like Tammy Wynette!). “Tower Of Strength” was the band’s second Top 40 entry of the year following “The Money EP”, it was also the second hit in 1994 to have the title “Tower Of Strength”. The first had been the rerelease of The Mission’s single that had originally been a No 12 hit in 1988. It made No 33 the second time around.

It got me thinking about the phrase and its origins which are religious in nature with it usually being reserved for God in the Bible. Its usage changed to referring to religious faith in general when Tennyson used the phrase to compare the Duke of Wellington to God. However, it was Shakespeare who changed its meaning to the one we understand today when he used it in Richard III. Blimey! Bit of culture there! Musically, there have been two other chart entries of a song called “Tower Of Strength” and both were in the charts at the same time in late 1961 so I’m guessing they were different versions of the same song – one by somebody called Gene McDaniels but by far the bigger hit was by Frankie Vaughan who went all the way to No 1. As for Skin, it sounds to me like they’ve pinched the melody from “Lean On Me” by Bill Withers which I suppose makes some sort of sense. “Tower Of Strength”? “Lean On Me”? Same sort of thing isn’t it? Oh please yourselves (again)!

Before Ant and Dec were the TV behemoths that we know today, they were of course PJ & Duncan, characters from BBC teen drama Byker Grove who went on to be actual pop stars after performing as the fictional band Grove Matrix in the show. It was almost Monkees-esque. The song they performed in the show was called “Tonight I’m Free” and was the duo’s first actual single release in 1993 but it failed to chart. Second single “Why Me?” did crack the Top 40 but it was third single “Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble” that will always be what people remember about their career as pop stars. Ridiculous and, indeed ridiculed, it was also catchy as hell based around the catchphrase of US boxing and wrestling ring announcer Michael’s Buffer. The addition of the ‘h’ in ‘Rhumble’ was to avoid copyright issues as Buffer had trademarked the phrase. The lyric “Watch us wreck the mike PSYCHE!” far outlives anything else they released and they released a lot of stuff – three studio albums and fifteen singles! There’s also a line that gave a big indication as to their future careers though we couldn’t possibly have known at the time. “I’m Ant (I’m Declan), a duo, a twosome” they…erm…rap? They would eventually rebrand themselves as Ant & Dec whilst still recording music (specifically thejr third album – “The Cult Of Ant & Dec”) before giving it up in 1997.

There were two different versions of the CD single so to differentiate between them in the Piccadilly Our Price, the singles buyer wrote on the masterbags “Twat” (Dec/ Duncan) and “Twat in a hat” (Ant / PJ). When I got transferred to the Our Price in Stockport in the new year, it turned out that the album the staff had played most on the shop stereo had been PJ & Duncan’s “Psyche” and that their favourite track was one called “She Scores A Perfect Ten”. Want to hear it? Sure you do…

Hmm. It’s got a bit of an East 17 “Deep” vibe so better than I would have expected. Also better than expected are the lads moves in this TOTP performance – talk about in sync! PSYCHE!

We’ve reached eight weeks at the top for Wet Wet Wet with “Love Is All Around”. By this point they had drawn level with Shakespear’s Sister and The Archies in terms of length of time as the UK No 1 knowing that one more would see them replicate Frankie Goes To Hollywood, Wings and John Travolta and Olivia Newton John. The sixteen weeks of Bryan Adams was still a way off though. Were we thinking it could be challenged at this point or did we believe that common sense must kick in soon?

The play out song is “Trouble” by Shampoo. Now they might seem like a small footnote in the history of pop music and they may have only had five Top 40 hits none of which got higher than No 11 and their four albums didn’t sell anywhere except Japan but…there is still so much love for this pair online and I know people who swear by them.

Jacqui Blake and Carrie Askew were school friends from Plumstead, London who ran a fanzine for Manic Street Preachers and somehow became pop stars themselves. The TOTP producers managed to get them as the last act on this show but the first on the next so I’ll keep my powder (and hair) dry for the moment before delving into the Shampoo story in the next post.

https://youtu.be/gLDcC2JJKKw

So how did Julian Clary do as host? I think he brought something different to the show and I liked how he shook up the presenting format with his walks across stage and shots of him ‘dancing’ and the pretence of him having his make up retouched mid song. However, it all seemed a bit tame on reflection. I guess he was never going to do a Norman Lamont pre watershed though.

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Clubhouse	Living In The Sunshine	No
2	Bad Boys Inc	Take Me Away (I’ll Follow You)	As if
3	Warren G and Nate Dogg	Regulate	I did not
4	The Grid	Swamp Thing	It’s a no from me
5	C. J. Lewis	Everything Is Alright (Uptight)	Never
6	The B-52’s	(Meet) The Flintstones	Nope
7	Skin	Tower Of Strength	Nah
8	PJ and Duncan	Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble	Negative
9	Wet Wet Wet	Love Is All Around	Didn’t happen
10	Shampoo	Trouble	And no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m001l56h/top-of-the-pops-21071994

TOTP Rewind – the 90s

My memories of 90s chart music

TOTP 28 MAR 1996

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TOTP 30 NOV 1995

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TOTP 12 OCT 1995

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TOTP 27 JUL 1995

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TOTP 23 FEB 1995

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TOTP 05 JAN 1995

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TOTP 08 DEC 1994

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TOTP 13 OCT 1994

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TOTP 04 AUG 1994

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TOTP 21 JUL 1994

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