Ultra

TOTP 15 JAN 1999

Posted on by 80stastic

We’re in mid January 1999 and Christmas is long gone and well behind us. The release schedules have woken up and been reactivated so there are some ‘new’ songs on tonight alongside some of the older hits that are still knocking about the charts which executive producer Chris Cowey doesn’t seem able to let go of. To that end, two of the first artists on tonight both featured in the last show. Indeed, they were the first two songs in that episode from seven days prior. As Men At Work once sang – “it’s just overkill”. Anyway, Kate Thornton is our host and we start with “End Of The Line” by the Honeyz. This was its third appearance on the show and this performance was just a repeat showing of the previous week’s. Having said that, it was a very hardy hit spending five weeks inside the Top 10 including the busy festive period when singles can get swept away in the Christmas rush. With nothing much else to say about this one, I looked to the internet for inspiration and found a piece online that talked about the purple outfits the group are wearing here which they also donned in the video. The article says:

“…the purple overcoats, which were low-key iconic in that they never permeated popular culture but remain a recognisable visual reference point within the Honeyz’ narrative.”

Paul Begaud – cantstopthepop.com – Dec 2020

Look, I’m no expert on the Honeyz so I should defer to Paul but, on the other hand, really?! Iconic?! They were purple overcoats not Geri Halliwell’s Union Jack dress!

The mid to late 90s fascination with the disco era of the Bee Gees was quite a thing. Seriously though, look at all of these hits that were either cover versions or featured samples of the Gibb brothers’ work around that period:

  • “How Deep Is Your Love” – Take That – 1996
  • “Words” – Boyzone – 1996
  • “Stayin’ Alive” – N-Trance – 1995
  • “We Trying To Stay Alive” – Wyvlef Jean – 1997
  • “Night Fever” – Adam Garcia – 1998
  • “More Than A Woman” – 911 – 1998
  • “Tragedy” – Steps – 1998

The trend continued apace in early 1999 with the highest chart entry of the week – “You Should Be…” by Blockster. This was a vehicle for DJ, producer and remixer Brandon Block whose career had seen him play all the ‘super clubs’ such as Up Yer Ronson, Ministry Of Sound and Republica. In 1999, he became a chart star with this reworking of the Bee Gees classic “You Should Be Dancing”. Given the glut of Bee Gees hits at the time, it doesn’t seem a very inventive concept but I guess he executed it pretty well. He’s the guy on the turntables (obviously) who looks a bit like The Apprentice reject, Strictly Come Dancing loser and JD Vance hanger on Thomas “Bosh” Skinner. However, for some of us non-dance heads, he is best known for this incident at the BRITS 2000…

Supposedly he was off his face and was convinced by the friends he was with that he had won an award and that he should go and collect it on stage. Ah, we’ve all been there. For instance, I was once on holiday in New York and found myself in a bar called The Slaughtered Lamb, a horror-themed bar in Greenwich Village. It had props like caged skeletons and werewolves. I’d had a few (OK, a lot!) and my friend Robin convinced me that the werewolf figure had blood dripping down its face and that I should report it to the bar staff. So I did. The woman behind the bar dismissed me like the fool I was whilst Robin and the rest of our group guffawed.

Anyway, Brandon Block seemed to learn from his public embarrassment and in 2009 agreed to take part in an anti-drugs campaign for the government. He followed that up by working with Blenheim the London drug and alcohol treatment service as a project worker and has also been employed by the NHS, working with people who have multiple complex needs. He currently works as a Stress Management and Goal Mapping Coach with people suffering from mental health issues.

Here’s that other hit that was on just last week from Bryan Adams and Melanie C. I’ve got nothing left to say about “When You’re Gone” so I’m going to shamelessly pinch a story from a podcast I’ve discovered called the Eighties Archive Podcast. It’s basically two fellas talking about 80s music but not the obvious stuff. They interview people from back then who may or may not have had hit records and it’s actually very engaging mainly because of their enthusiasm for the period. So you might get say, Leigh Gorman from Bow Wow Wow who was brilliant or Richard Jobson of The Skids and The Armoury Show (again brilliant) or some bloke who used to be in Roman Holliday (not so brilliant). Anyway, in their latest show, one of the presenters told a tale of how he was working in the Our Price store in the Lakeside shopping centre in 1991 at Christmas when all the punters seemed to want to buy was “Bohemian Rhapsody” by Queen (rereleased after Freddie Mercury’s death and that year’s festive No 1) and “(Everything I Do) I Do It For You” by Bryan Adams. So fed up was the presenter with this situation that, fuelled by the bravado of youth (him and his mates thought they owned the shop), he started shouting at people that they didn’t have any more Bryan Adams singles. One customer took offence and said “You’re meant to be a record shop” to which the presenter replied “And you’re meant to have taste!” and flicked him the V’s! Scandalous behaviour that was witnessed by an Area Manager on a store visit which led to the presenter being sacked and quite right too. The moral of the story? Don’t disrespect Bryan Adams…nor flick the V’s at a customer when working in a shop.

A classic case of a record label indulging in careful release scheduling now. Ultra had bounded into the charts the previous year with their debut hit “Say You Do” landing at No 11. However, subsequent hits had seen diminishing returns at play so another big hit was required. The best way to do that? Release a single – “Rescue Me” – when it doesn’t take as many sales to get you up the higher end of the charts of course – early to mid January. Then you double down by copying the sound of somebody else’s recent huge hit – in this case Savage Garden – and bingo! Your boy band has a Top 10 single. Beware though. The effects of a reviving January hit will wear off fairly quickly and you’ll be left with that underlying cause of discomfort which is the absolute knowledge that your charges are, in fact, worthless crud and you’ll have to accept the truth that they are going nowhere. Which is exactly what happened to Ultra who were never seen nor hear from again after this hit. Hurray!

Oh this is just taking the piss now! Why is Chris Cowey showing a performance from four months ago of “Millennium” by Robbie Williams? I suggested in a recent post that the reason behind a repeat showing of him doing “No Regrets” was because he’s Robbie Williams and I stand by that given the decision to re-show this. Just as Jamie Theakston had eulogised about him in his intro the other week, so Kate Thornton bangs on about how everyone loves Robbie including her and her Mum! Cowey justifies the clip’s inclusion in the show by tying it to the fact that his second album “I’ve Been Expecting You” is at No 1 (which was true) but it does rather feel like it was shoe-horning it into the show. Anyway, I’m not about to comment on this one again so here’s what I wrote about it in the 18 Sep 1998 show:

TOTP 18 SEP 1998

And the 28 Aug show:

TOTP 28 AUG 1998

What the Hell is this? Why was Cowey encouraging presenter Kate Thornton to engage with the artists ‘backstage’ in some horribly cringeworthy interactions (they don’t qualify as interviews) that weren’t funny, entertaining nor worthwhile. There have been numerous attempts to spice up the format over the years by conversing with the artists or sometimes just celebrity guests and I can’t think of one that has ever worked. Moving on…

And yet another 70s disco era song revived in the late 90s. At least this one wasn’t a Bee Gees tune. After Blockster earlier comes Da Click, a UK garage group on the FFRR label, who took Chic’s anthem “Good Times”, added a load of rapping all over it, interpolated the vocals from Luther Vandross’ “Never Too Much”, called it “Good Rhymes” and had a No 14 hit with it. The words ‘Yankee Doodle’, ‘feather’ and ‘macaroni’ come to mind. It’s not big and it’s not clever. It also wasn’t any good. I always got this lot confused with Da Hool who is a German DJ and producer. I think my confusion is understandable which is more than I can say about Da Click’s decision to record this rubbish. It gets worse. Two years later, one of Da Click’s number – DJ Pied Piper – was responsible for one of the worst No 1 records ever – the execrable 2-step garage ‘anthem’ “Do You Really Like It?”.

There have been a few very famous Justins in the world of music. Justin Timberlake, Justin Bieber, Justin Hawkins of The Darkness but before all of them came simply Justin. Only 15 years old here, this kid became a name after appearing in a BBC TV show called The Fame Game which followed the hopes and aspirations of young people wanting to be stars. Off the back of it, Justin (Osuji) would have a small Top 40 hit with a cover of “This Boy” by The Beatles. The follow up was “Over You”, a nothing ballad with the most ridiculous opening lines ever given to a 15 year old boy to sing who sounds like his voice hasn’t broken yet…

“I′ve had many many setbacks, misendeavours in my life

But it’s never gotten to me, all that trouble and my strife”

Writer(s): Cody Miller, Justin Stokes, Laurel Tessa Mahoney, Miranda Leigh Berdahl, James Colter Schaffner, Zach Inmon Walker

“Many, many setbacks”? By the age of 15? Now, of course, some kids have had terrible lives by that point and witnessed some awful things but in the context of trying to sell a love song to a TV audience, it just doesn’t seem authentic. Thankfully I don’t remember “Over You” at all. The only one of his that springs to mind is a cover of “Let It Be Me” by The Everly Brothers in early 2000 which would be Justin’s last Top 40 hit. Although his original pop career would end there, Justin would reinvent himself as Sonny J Mason working as a singer-songwriter and producer, collaborating with the likes of Craig David, Sugababes and So Solid Crew whilst also releasing his own solo recordings.

Yes! Finally! A great track gets its just deserts! Although it maybe felt unexpected that Fat Boy Slim was at No 1, it probably shouldn’t have done. After all, “Praise You” wasn’t the first chart topper he’d been involved with. As part of The Housemartins, he’d just missed out on being the Christmas No 1 by a week in 1986 with “Caravan Of Love” and at the very start of the 90s, his Beats International vehicle rose to the summit with “Dub Be Good To Me”. Then, of course, his Fat Boy Slim persona had already delivered him two big hits in 1998 with “The Rockefeller Skank” and “Gangster Trippin” so the writing had been on the wall for us all to read. And yet I do recall being slightly taken aback that he’d done it again in 1999 despite the quality of the track.

I’m not going to list all the source material that Norman Cook sampled to create “Praise You” – all that information is available via a quick search of the internet and in any case, I don’t know any of the originals at all so I can’t see the point in referencing them. What I do know is that he created an almost perfect dance track that had that curious, undefinable quality of being able to cross over into the mainstream. How did he do it? Musical genius? Pure luck? Cosmic forces at work causing the stars to align? If the answer was that obvious we’d all be raiding our record collections and looking to put together a patchwork of sounds that shouldn’t go together but somehow do. Something else that shouldn’t have worked but did was the promo video. Yes, that one. Directed by and starring Spike Jonze, it had the effect upon first viewing of making the audience exclaim “What the f**k was that?” so amateurish and so bizarre looking was it. Its protagonists, the fictional Torrance Community Dance Group, essentially invented the ‘flash mob’ phenomenon when filming the chaotic dance routines unannounced at the Fox Bruin Theater in Los Angeles. Indeed so low were its production values (the whole thing only cost $800 to make) that MTV refuses to air it initially until Cook advised them that it was supposed to look like that. It would go on to win three MTV Video Music Awards making their initial stance look ludicrous.

A small gripe though, why did we only get to see it once? Yes, it only had a solitary week at the top of the charts but that didn’t stop Chris Cowey from allowing multiple repeats of previous No 1s which were now descending the charts. Was he worried about the quality of the video as well?

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1HoneyzEnd Of The LineNah
2BlocksterYou Should Be…Negative
3Bryan Adams / Melanie CWhen You’re GoneNo
4UltraRescue MeNo thanks
5Robbie WilliamsMillenniumNope
6Da ClickGood RhymesI did not
7JustinOver YouNever happening
8Fatboy SlimPraise YouNo but I had the album

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree

TOTP 03 JUL 1998

Posted on by 80stastic

This list marks a true milestone for me. This is TOTP Rewind post No 700! Yes, if you combine all the 80s and 90s shows reviews together, the total is 700. How did I get here and more importantly, was it worth it? Well, I’ll leave the second part of that question to anybody who’s taken the time to read any of the previous 699 posts to answer. As for ‘how did I get here?’ (you’ve got “Once In A Lifetime” by Talking Heads running through your mind now haven’t you?), I’ll tell you. It’s taken me nearly nine years of watching, considering and writing to get me to 700. NINE YEARS! I must be either someone who’s very dedicated to a cause or a complete narcissist.

To mark the occasion, the gods of pop music nostalgia have plotted to provide me with one of the worst running orders in TOTP history but before we get to all that, we have a brand new presenter making their debut on the show in the form of Kate Thornton. A journalist initially (she was the youngest ever editor of Smash Hits magazine aged just 21), she made the transition to TV via ITV current affairs programme Straight Up and is widely credited as the person who placed “Candle In The Wind” centre stage as part of the national grieving process for the death of Princess Diana. Apparently, her bosses wanted some music to soundtrack a photo tribute piece for Diana and Thornton was tasked with sourcing something appropriate. As the news broke on a Sunday, the record library was shut and so Kate was left with whatever she had in her car. A copy of Elton John’s Greatest Hits was on the stereo and the rest is literally history. Big history. The BBC came calling and a place in the TOTP presenter roster was offered. I like that the producers made some attempt at humour by introducing her with a skit as if she’d been pulled out of the studio audience at random to replace a poorly Jayne Middlemiss. Maybe she had, though clearly not in the manner presented. She gives a very confident and assured performance on her debut and would become the host of X Factor in 2004. I never quite understood why she was replaced by Dermot O’Leary. I believe she’s to be found on Greatest Hits Radio these days along with all the other BBC presenters deemed not hip enough anymore like Ken Bruce and Simon Mayo although to be fair, I’m not sure if either of those two were ever hip.

Anyway, we start with a new face with a shiny, new hit from a famous family. Before 1998, the phrase ‘Eagle Eyes’ would have conjured up memories of Action Man toys from my childhood but Eagle-Eye Cherry (his actual real name!) came along to change all that.

The son of American jazz artist Don Cherry and Swedish designer Moki Cherry and the half brother of Neneh Cherry, he had early career intentions to be an actor and enrolled in the High School Of Performing Arts in New York (Fame and all that) being in the same class as Jennifer Aniston. However, he would ultimately choose music as his first passion and returned to his home of Stockholm to write his debut album “Desireless”. His instincts paid off when the album sold four million copies around the world, spearheaded by lead single and opening track “Save Tonight”. Irresistible for daytime radio controllers, it’s actually quite a simple song based around the well established and familiar chord progression of Am-F-C-G that is the backbone of many a huge hit including “Hey Jude”, “Wonderwall” and “Imagine”. It’s slick and smooth though with a vocal from Cherry that has enough interest in it to keep the listener’s attention. Great things were predicted for Eagle-Eye – my wife was enamoured enough to buy “Desireless” and see him live at the Manchester Academy – but the old diminishing returns and changing tastes seem to do for him and the hits had all but dried up come the new millennium. He still recording new material though with his last album released in 2023.

Sticking with the eagle theme come Hanson whose latest hit “Thinking Of You” includes the lyric “Fly with the wings of an eagle” running throughout its length. The fifth and final single taken from their “Middle Of Nowhere” album, listening back to it, you could understand why it hadn’t appeared earlier in the release schedule. The album’s lead single had been the No 1 “MMMBop” and, to paraphrase Kate Thornton in her intro, whether you found it adorable or downright irritating, you couldn’t deny it was insanely catchy. Sadly for “Thinking Of You”, it was no “MMMBop” despite its clear aspirations to be so. However, it was MMBop-lite which sounds like a diet version of a fizzy drink but you get my drift. It seems to have all the component parts but it doesn’t have that killer hook. It’s like an early demo of their most famous song before they’d worked it into shape as the pop mega-hit it became. “Thinking Of You” would be the band’s last hit of the 90s (though they’d have three more into the new decade).

As with Hanson before them, after a couple of years of hits, Space were coming to the end of their time as Top 40 stars. Conversely, this, their penultimate hit, was called “Begin Again”. Another track lifted from their Top 3 album “Tin Planet”, it would peak at No 21, their smallest ever chart hit. Now, I’ve championed Space a bit in previous posts and my wife had their first album “Spiders” but by this point, their quirky flavoured schtick was starting to grate a bit. That eerie sound that they’d cultivated which had initially charmed was becoming predictable. “Begin Again” was another track with swooping strings and a almost mariachi feel to it with singer Tommy Scott banging on about being a man who would kill for love whilst giving his usual wild-eyed stare to the camera. Give it a rest Tommy! After leaving their label Gut Records, the band released their music to the fanbase via their website until they split in 2005. However, they did ‘begin again’ in 2011 and are still a recording and touring entity to this day.

Here’s another link back to Hanson with another boy band. 911 were on to their seventh (of ten) consecutive Top 10 hits with “How Do You Want Me To Love You” which sounds impressive but was it really? Of those ten hits, they all debuted in their peak position in week one and none of them stayed inside the Top 10 for more than two weeks. Clearly their fan base were spending their pocket money to purchase the singles as soon as they were released when they would have been heavily discounted as well to create a high entry point but when the contributing factors of fanbase and discounting were taken away, there was no substance to sustain their chart lives. This one was a prime example. Week one in at No 10, week two dropped to No 35, week three out of the Top 40 altogether. Yes, they did have a No 2 and a No 1 hit but both were cover versions of well known songs so that diminishes those achievements in my book rather. They had three albums that peaked at Nos 13, 10 and 8 selling enough copies for one gold and two silver discs. Is that impressive? Mildly at a push I’d say. Away from the numbers (as Paul Weller once sang), this was a drippy, insipid pop ballad that was forgotten as soon as the last note sounded.

Oh come on! We’ve already had two boy bands and now a third?! And this one, as Kate Thornton tells us in her intro, has toured with 911. So hang on, they were the support act for a group that themselves were almost completely lacking in any discernible merit but who topped the bill ahead of them? Have I got that right? OK so what we’re saying is that Ultra were a poor man’s 911?! Dear Lord. Can you get any worse than that?! After scoring a hit with debut single “Say You Do”, these no marks were back with a follow up called “Say It Once”. Heavens! They couldn’t even come up with two song titles that didn’t crib off each other! This is really poor stuff to mark my 700th post. The bad news is that they had a further two hits after this. Say it ain’t so.

For Pete’s sake! No, for my sake and my 700th post! This is no way to mark the occasion – Hanson, 911, Ultra and now Aaron Carter?! You’ve got to be kidding me?! This guy was the little brother of Nick Carter from the Backstreet Boys and he was just ten years old at the time of this broadcast. By comparison, the youngest Hanson brother was 12. Had we seen anything like this since Little Jimmy Osmond tormented us with “Long Hair Lover From Liverpool” in 1972? I can’t think of a similar act. What on earth was this all about and why was it happening? I’m guessing it was the most cynical act by the little blighter’s record company to cash in on the popularity of the Backstreet Boys but was it really that blunt? Well, he did support his big brother’s band on tour so maybe it was.

Apparently he’d already had three UK hit singles by this point so did we mercifully miss them or have I reviewed them and completely obliterated them from my memory banks? For the record, the fourth hit was a scandalous cover of “Surfin’ USA” by The Beach Boys. Watching the performance of it here just feels wrong. Not as bad as when Channel 4 aired the Minipops series in 1983 which was not just a dodgy idea but one of the most heinous concepts ever conceived and executed but still wrong. Oh, and the intro with Jo Whiley was absolute cringe. Why?! As is sadly often the way when fame comes to someone so young, Carter would have a traumatic and tragically short life dying in 2022 aged just 34 by accidental drowning in a bath following the taking of Xanax and difluoroethane.

TOTP Executive Producer Chris Cowey has finally relented and has allowed a video to feature on the show. Apparently, this was the first promo shown since 1st May 1998 after eight weeks of studio only appearances. I’m not sure why he introduced the policy in the first place nor why he made an exception for the Beastie Boys but in the case of the latter, I’m guessing Cowey couldn’t ignore the return of one of the biggest names in rap especially as their single crashed into the Top 5. I’ve said this before but just about everyone I ever worked with in Our Price over a 10 year period loved the Beastie Boys. Not the “(You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party)” version but the more mature and achingly cool era of the band exemplified by “Paul’s Boutique”*, the eccentricity of “Check Your Head” and the eclectic nature of “Ill Communication”. Accordingly, when “Hello Nasty” came out in 1998 after a four year gap, it was a big deal for many of my colleagues.

“Intergalactic” was its lead single and it came out swinging with a big sound and a video that seemed epic at the time but maybe isn’t viewed as that through 2025 eyes. A tribute to the Japanese Kaiju genre of films (Godzilla and the like) and featuring a giant robot battling an octopus-headed creature (?), it won the 1999 Best Hip Hop Video at the MTV Video Music Awards. The battle scenes between the robot and the octopus thing remind me of the Power Rangers franchise which I had to endure watching when my son was a young boy and it was one of the oddest TV series I think I’ve ever seen. How it ran for 30 years is beyond me. Whatever the merits or drawbacks of the video, and certainly after the crime against music that was NYCC’s brutally bad cover version of “Fight For Your Right” earlier in 1998, it was good to have the real thing back.

*Here’s another link back to Hanson. “Thinking Of You” that was on the show earlier was produced by the Dust Brothers (Michael Simpson and John King) whose other credits include “Paul’s Boutique”.

Baddiel, Skinner and the Lightning Seeds are No 1 for a third week but any chance of the England football team winning the World Cup crown disappeared in dramatic fashion three days before this TOTP aired. They crashed out on penalties to Argentina in the Round of 16 after having had David Beckham sent off for petulantly lashing out at Diego Simeone whilst lay on the floor. For a while, Beckham was public enemy No 1 with even an effigy of him and a noose tied to a lamppost making headlines. With England out, there would be the inevitable drop off in sales of “3 Lions ‘98”. However, it would return to the charts eight times over the years when a football tournament has been played. The nation’s wait for a follow up to 1966 and all that continues however…

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Eagle-Eye CherrySave TonightNo but my wife had his album
2Hanson Thinking Of YouNegative
3SpaceBegin AgainNah
4911How Do You Want Me To Love YouAs if
5UltraSay It OnceNever
6Aaron CarterSurfin’ USA Hell no!
7Beastie BoysIntergalacticNope
8Baddiel, Skinner and the Lightning Seeds3 Lions ’98No

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m002jy45/top-of-the-pops-03071998?seriesId=unsliced

TOTP 17 APR 1998

Posted on by 80stastic

Dearie me! This doesn’t look like the strongest TOTP line up I have to say. In fact it looks completely uninspiring to be frank. As such, my motivation is not at the levels it should be. The 1998 repeats have always been a bit of a slog so far to be honest and running orders like this are not helping. Well, I guess I’ve got to just get through it. Once more into the breach, dear friends, once more…

Our host is Jo Whiley who would hail someone farting “The Birdie Song” as a musical genius if it kept her on TV. Thankfully the acts tonight aren’t quite that bad. We start with Billie Myers who was only just on last week (of course she was in the Chris Cowey era) performing her hit “Kiss The Rain”. I mentioned last time how she was sort of ‘the other’ Billie of 1998 next to Billie Piper and it got me thinking about how many famous Billies there were/had been. Here’s what I came up with:

  • Billie Eilish
  • Billie Holiday
  • Billie Jo Spears
  • Billie Joe Armstrong
  • Billie Whitelaw
  • Billie Jean King
  • Billie from Here Come the Double Deckers!

OK, the last ones a bit of a cheat but the first four are all singers so if you add Billie Piper and Billie Myers to that list that’s six which seems a fair few music artists especially when you consider I haven’t included those whose name is spelt Billy. As for Billie Myers, where does she rank in that list for you?

Sticking with the name game theme, the next artist has quite the moniker. Ultra Naté whose real name is…erm…Ultra Naté – no really, that’s her actual name – Ultra Naté Wyche – is back with a follow up to her massive hit single “Free”. It’s taken almost a year for it to be released but to be fair to her record label AM:PM, “Free” was such a monster spending three and a half months inside the Top 40 that I guess they had to let the momentum of that single finally run out of steam so as not to deflect sales from any new material. Plus, AM:PM released a “Free (The Mixes)” single in the January just to make sure they completely squeezed any remaining sales potential out of the track. With all that saturation, it probably made sense to wait a while before releasing a follow-up and, resisting the temptation to rinse and repeat, it wasn’t just a carbon copy of its predecessor. Sure, it’s still a dance track but, as we have discovered in this long, long journey through 90s music, dance music could be many different things and come in many different colours. Whilst not as immediate as “Free” nor as big a hit, “Found A Cure” still found a market spending two consecutive weeks at No 6.

Next in this unappealing running order is/are Mase (or is it Ma$e?) featuring Total with a rap track called “What You Want”. I can’t say I know much about Mase nor his music but even I, unaccustomed as I am to the rap genre, can tell that the start of this performance is hackneyed and lazy. Did he really just run on stage and shout “Everybody throw your hands in the air and wave ‘em like you just don’t care”?! This is followed up by encouraging the studio audience to chant “Oh yeah” and then, focussing on “all the ladies”, gets them to “scream!”. Really?! There’s then a lot of rapping about Mase’s girl and his money and…shopping? I’m not really sure though he mentions enchiladas and giving her carats until she feels a rabbit. Is that a reference to buying a fur stole? I’m so confused and so as Mase ultimately as he couldn’t decide between a career as a rapper or dedicating his life to God as he retired from the music industry to become a pastor before returning in 2004 with an album called “Welcome Back”. It’s an unusual though not unique choice of career paths (didn’t MC Hammer also become an ordained minister?). It reminded me of my mate Robin who once took a carers advice exercise the result of which was that his optimum careers were either being a social worker or a comedian.

What are the chances?! Two acts on the same show with the name Ultra?! That’s where the similarities end though. I must have deliberately obliterated this lot from my memory banks as there is nothing familiar about them at all apart from them appearing to be a prototype version of Busted. No, wait – Busted playing the music of S Club 7. Their hit “Say You Do” is so annoyingly catchy that it’s…well…annoying. The usual route of support slots on tours by major artists (Boyzone and Louise in this case) helped establish a fan base (they were huge in South East Asia and Italy apparently) but that old music industry banana skin of record company restructuring saw the A&R team who signed them leave and they were released from their contract. Three of the four members continued as Rider who released a football record for the 2002 World Cup featuring Terry ‘El Tel’ Venables but it failed to chart. Conversely, they might have been better off keeping their original band name or at least adapting it to ‘The Ultras’. If you know, you know.

Right, who are these two? K–Ci & JoJo? Sounds like a TV show on the Disney Channel in the 90s. Apparently, they were half of the US R&B group Jodeci who were on a hiatus meaning that the group members could pursue other projects. K-Ci & JoJo were brothers Cedric and Joel Hailey who took the ball and ran with it all the way to No 1 in America with this single “All My Life”. For three weeks it reigned atop the Billboard Hot 100 but over here it had to make do with one week at No 8. It did, however, spend ten weeks inside the Top 40 descending gradually but consistently in an unusual chart journey. Clearly, there were some live vocals going on in this performance but they did seem to lack a bit of control – there was definitely some very elongated ‘ooh ooh-ing’ going on which I have to say caused my dog to howl uncontrollably when I watched this TOTP episode (no really – he did!).

The ‘all my life’ chorus sounded familiar but I couldn’t place what it reminded me of for ages until it finally clicked. Now, they’re nothing like each other in every other respect but the phrasing and intonation on those three words are almost exactly the same.

After some very unstimulating turns so far, we finally get to a song that inspires a tiny bit of excitement (for me anyway). If Ultra were an early version of Busted, then could a case be made that Ben Folds Five were the blueprint for Keane? I know, I know. Putting music into neatly labelled boxes probably isn’t the smartest nor fairest practice (and I’ve no doubt been guilty of it many, many times during the course of this blog). What I will say is that the “Battle Of Who Could Care Less” hitmakers were at the very least out of the ordinary with their acidic, piano driven, power pop tunes.

However, they risked alienating their fan base with this, their biggest hit “Brick” which was a much more subdued and earnest sound telling the story, as it did, of the abortion that Folds and his high school girlfriend went through. There is a beautiful intensity to the track though which can’t be denied. What wasn’t especially beautiful though was its title and it got me thinking of other songs that have titles that don’t seem to match their sound and I came up with this which is surely the ultimate example of the phenomenon…

The rebirth, rejuvenation and resurrection of Robbie Williams is complete! After looking down and out as the end of 1997 came into sight, he was now back at the very top as his debut album “Life Thru A Lens” has finally made it to the top of the charts six months after it was initially released. To celebrate the achievement, he’s been invited onto the show to perform a track from it. “Killing Me” was the one chosen for the appearance. It’s a brave choice in a way what with the dark song title but presumably Robbie wanted something that he believed would show people his depth as an artist. Certainly, “Killing Me” is a world away from his cover of George Michael’s “Freedom” which seemed a lazy and uninspired decision to launch his solo career with. I guess he could have gone with the more uptempo title track but on reflection, I think he made the right choice.

Run-D.M.C. vs Jason Nevins remain at No 1 for a fifth straight week with “It’s Like That”.

Despite all its sales and all its plaudits, is there any better way of demonstrating the legacy of this track than it being used to soundtrack an Australian McDonalds advert in 2025?!

Order of appearanceArtistTitleDid I buy it?
1Billie MyersKiss The RainNo
2 Ultra Naté Found A CureNope
3Mase featuring TotalWhat You WantNever happening
4UltraSay You DoOf course not
5K-Ci & JoJoAll My LifeNah
6Ben Folds FiveBrickLiked it, didn’t buy it
7Robbie WilliamsKilling MeNot available to purchase as a single
8Run-D.M.C. vs Jason NevinsIt’s Like ThatAnd no

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m002hf77/top-of-the-pops-17041998?seriesId=unsliced