I’ve decided that this post will be a Diana’s death free zone on account of it having dominated the last two and that we still have weeks of the Elton John single to come. Right then, let’s get to it starting with tonight’s presenter. Now, I thought that, under executive producer Chris Cowey, the ‘golden mic’ feature where a celebrity would host the show had been done away with and replaced with a roster of young BBC presenters sourced from their existing youth TV output. So why is comedian Mark Lamarr on hosting duty this week? Well, maybe he was considered as a member of the extended BBC family or an associate member if you like seeing as he was a regular on two of the corporation’s popular panel games Shooting Stars and Never Mind The Buzzcocks at the time. Anyway, our host he is and he will lead us through tonight’s acts in a similarly dismissive manner to his Buzzcocks demeanour. Well, did we expect anything else?

We start with Hanson who were only on last week but are back again as they have shot into the charts at No 4 with “Where’s The Love”. I recently met up with a friend with whom I discussed my blog and admitted that after nearly nine years of writing it that occasionally the creative juices can run dry. I summed this position up by saying “Sometimes I ask myself ‘what more can I say about Hanson?’”. And so here I am facing that very question. OK, how about this? Somebody on Twitter described Hanson as ‘Kula Shaker meets The Osmonds’ which I thought was pretty clever but he followed it up with ‘Tuneless meets unlistenable’ which I thought wasn’t. What was unlistenable were some of the comments that drummer Zac made on his Pinterest account in 2020 which were described by Ashley Spencer of Vice Media as “a trove of pro-gun memes many of which were racist, transphobic, homophobic and sexist”. Three years later, Zac Hanson was appointed as a deacon in the Georgian Orthodox Church under the name Father Mercurios. Form your own opinions. I had to.

In the last post, I posited the theory that Ocean Colour Scene had become serial chart stars by 1997 based on the peaks of their last half a dozen or so singles. The same logic could also be applied to Cast. Check out the placings of their last six hits below:

8 – 9 – 4 – 7 – 9 – 7

The last of those was “Live The Dream”, the third single released from their sophomore album “Mother Nature Calls”. It’s a fairly laid back, strolling type number that’s quite pleasant though, on reflection, I’m kind of surprised was considered suitable for release as a single. Its chart high would suggest I don’t know what I’m taking about*. However, I’m pretty sure all of those peaks were achieved in their first week of sales when they would have been discounted as new releases so was it more a reflection of their growing fanbase than the hit potential of the song?

*Actually, I did my dissertation at polytechnic on what makes a hit record a hit record – I think I called it something one the lines of ‘The Mechanics of the Music Industry’. Something wanky like that. Does that mean I did know what I was talking about? Of course not as I came to no valid conclusions. Obviously.

For the aforementioned question “What more can I say about Hanson?”, repeat for Tina Moore. Well, The Guardian no less ranked her hit “Never Gonna Let You Go” at No 11 in their list of ‘The best UK garage tracks – ranked!’ in 2019 which I guess shouldn’t be disregarded assuming that sort of thing means something to you (it doesn’t to me). As for this performance, this is just a repeat of her previous appearance from the other week which Mark Lamarr had clearly watched before his stint as host as he takes the piss out of a part of it that I hadn’t picked up on before. “In the middle of this next track, Tina Moore does some of the snappiest footwork I’ve ever seen since Bambi learned to walk but watch very carefully as it might be too fast for the human eye” he warns. What follows, via a camera situated underneath the glass podium Tina is performing on, are some of the slowest, most plodding shoe shuffle moves ever witnessed on prime time TV!

Next up is Finley Quaye with his second hit single “Even After All”. The follow up to “Sunday Shining”, it would be his biggest ever peaking at No 10. It was again more of that soul/reggae fusion sound on which he made his name with a meandering groove that was perfect for whiling away whatever was left of the weekend after a big night out on the Saturday. Finley’s affectation here for singing with one arm behind his back confused me at first glance and left me asking the question “Finley Quaye didn’t have just one arm did he?”. Of course he didn’t so with that issue resolved my next query was “What is he wearing?”. The 60s went that way *points behind him* Finley!

My final question to myself was “How did I not know at the time that his nephew was trip-hop artist Tricky?”. The clue was right there in the title of Tricky’s album “Maxinquaye” which was literally the name of his Mum (minus an ‘e’) – Maxine Quaye who is Finley’s half-sister. Apparently the family ties are quite distant though – Finley and Tricky didn’t actually meet until 1996.

Here comes the next instalment of the curious tale of Kavana the pop star. I find his story* peculiar because on the one hand, he could have been extraordinarily successful with his classic teen heart-throb looks and catchy pop tunes and on the other, on another day, you look at him and think “How did this bloke become a pop star?” so insubstantial was he.

*Apparently he has an ‘explosive’ autobiography coming out later this year. I’m not so intrigued by his story that I would shell out good money for that though!

For the record, come 1997, Kavana was at the peak of his fame with two Top 10 hits under his belt and a Smash Hits award for Best Male Artist on his mantelpiece. Given all of this, the decision was taken to maintain his career momentum by rereleasing his debut single “Crazy Chance” which had been a minor hit in 1996. Given a remix and retitled as “Crazy Chance ‘97”, it would do the job efficiently enough by returning a No 16 chart peak. It was co-written by Take That’s Howard Donald but I don’t think I’d own up to that if I was Howard as it sounds like an Eternal B-side at best.

Now, what was going on with the staging of this performance? All that hazy camera focus and wobbly, garishly coloured ‘green screen’ effect behind Kavana? Many of the TOTP online community came up with the theory that it must have been a nod to or in joke with Mark Lamarr referencing his time on The Word the look of which Chris Cowey seems to be trying to recreate. Had he taken inspiration for the controversial Channel 4 show or was he just trying out something new?

Maybe Cowey was indeed trying to be inventive as we stick with the ‘green screen’ effect for the next act who are N–Tyce. That’s N-Tyce, not ‘N Sync nor N-Joi but N-Tyce…yeah, I’ve got no idea either. Apparently they had four UK Top 20 hits though of which this one, “We Come To Party” was their second and biggest. I’m sure it’s not as clear cut a divide as this but it did superficially seem like the first part of the 90s were all about boybands whilst the second part was the turn of all girl groups. Eternal, All Saints and of course the Spice Girls are names that trip easily off the tongue but N-Tyce? They would surely have been a perfect choice for the ‘identity parade’ round in the aforementioned Never Mind The Buzzcocks. As if that wasn’t enough indignity, there were those tours supporting Boyzone and Peter Andre that Mark Lamarr mentions in his link – “so it is true there’s always someone worse off than you” he closes his segue with. He’s not wrong though is he?

Just as with Tina Moore earlier, the next performance is just a re-showing of an earlier appearance on the show as we get Mariah Carey and “her wobbly legged sailors” again as Lamarr puts it. I like the way he plays along with the all too easily seen through deception that Mariah is actually there in the studio by craning his neck as if to get a better view. His shout of “Go on love!” is the icing on the cake. I have nothing else to say about her song “Honey” except that it was her 13th of 19 US No 1 singles! *Nineteen!

*You’ve got that Paul Hardcastle song in your head now haven’t you?

Even Lamarr has to stop his cynic act to prostrate himself at the altar of this week’s No 1. After crossing over into the mainstream with “Bitter Sweet Symphony”, The Verve really hit the big time with follow up “The Drugs Don’t Work”. A ballad that redefined melancholy, it was either written about Richard Ashcroft’s father-in-law who passed away after having cancer or his own Dad who died of a blood clot when Ashcroft was just 11 years old – depends which story you believe. One which I’m not sure that I believe is that its success was somehow fuelled by the mood of the nation which was in mourning over the death of Diana, Princess of Wales…Damn! I said I wasn’t going to mention it! Oh well, I nearly made it through the whole post. The theory goes that with the single having been released the day after Diana died, the public were more open to “The Drugs Don’t Work” than they perhaps might have been, that they connected with it more if you like, and bought it in enough copies to send it to No 1 for a week. Just a week mind as then “Candle In The Wind ‘97” would have been in the shops and all bets were off. It was, in effect, a makeshift chart topper until the real mania could take place courtesy of Elton John. I’m just not having that. I just don’t think that those people that were literally buying armfuls of the Elton single at a time would have also bought a song by an indie band, no matter how melancholy it was.

Now I can’t find any reference to it online anywhere but wasn’t there someone within the Irish media at the time, a TV presenter or a radio DJ perhaps, who totally misunderstood the song and called for it to be banned? Apparently, he thought that the story behind “The Drugs Don’t Work” was that of a drug user moaning that their recreational drugs weren’t giving them the required high. I haven’t made that up have I?

Order of appearance	Artist	Title	Did I buy it?
1	Hanson	Where’s The Love	Didn’t happen
2	Cast	Live The Dream	I did not
3	Tina Moore	Never Gonna Let You Go	Negative
4	Finley Quaye	Even After All	No but my wife had his album
5	Kavana	Crazy Chance ’97	Nope
6	N-Tyce	We Come To Party	No
7	Mariah Carey	Honey	Nah
8	The Verve	The Drugs Don’t Work	No but I had the Urban Hymns album

Disclaimer

I make no claim to the rights of this show and all ownership and contents including logos and graphics belongs totally to the BBC or copyright holder(s).

All opinions on the music and artists featured are my own. Sorry if you don’t agree.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0029cfk/top-of-the-pops-12091997?seriesId=unsliced